How do I masturbate without porn?

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Learning to masturbate without porn and porn fantasy can ease porn addictionAsk anyone over thirty! Remember your ancestors didn't have the Internet. Therefore they didn't fall into the trap of numbing their pleasure response as thoroughly as you have (if you can't masturbate without porn or porn fantasy). It's also possible they didn't masturbate nearly as much as men do today. See Masturbation, Fantasy and Captivity and WEIRD Masturbation Habits.

Your sexual responsiveness will increase automatically as your brain returns to full sensitivity. You don't have to do anything to make this happen; the solution is not doing. Here are one man's observations about how masturbation was without porn:

I've realized I have subverted my ability to reach orgasm by sensual touch. When I first went through puberty I would experiment with seeing just how softly I could touch myself and reach orgasm. When I did this I wasn't looking at porn or fantasizing. It was all about purely experiencing the pleasurable sensations arising from my own body, and these would build in a type of feedback loop until I exploded in orgasm. I suspect this isn't uncommon given I had a friend mention he had done the same sort of thing. My home had a lot of porn available so I pretty quickly started relying on it to help me release. I think I then trained myself to only be able to cum through porn and fantasizing. (He's reversing this now.)

Frequent ejaculation is not necessary for health reasons, so there's no need to force your body to ejaculate while you're waiting for it to return to normal sensitivity. See Don't I need to ejaculate frequently for good health?

Some men wait for two wet dreams without masturbating, so they can see what might constitute a normal interval for their bodies.

Below are some insightful comments on the effects of porn on masturbation. I think it captures so much of what we are trying to get across on this site:

Subject: Cause and effect. I've been reading these articles with some interest, and also participating in my own anti-porn/anti-masturbatory experiment. Here's what I've been thinking about: the two things, porn and masturbation, seem to be continually lumped together as a common cause of the sexual dysfunctions men are reporting. I realize men don't usually look at porn without masturbating. However, has there been any attempt to conclude whether it is porn with masturbation, porn w/o masturbation, or masturbation alone, that might be the cause of the problem? I realize this is a relatively new issue, and not many studies have been done. It just seems like from a scientific perspective, the researcher would want to try to separate these activities to refine the results. Speaking purely from personal experience, I tend to think its the porn that is the hyper-stimulus resulting in dysfunction, not the masturbation. The odd thing I am finding about my personal experiment is that without the porn, I don't really feel like masturbating and even when I try, I am not aroused enough to masturbate. My mind doesn't fantasize anymore, like it used to when I was a kid in the pre-porn days. I am interested in discovering if, after another month or two, my fantasy life returns. I kind of miss it.

Here are guys' comments about the differences between masturbation with and without porn:

  • If I just masturbate, then I may have that somewhat yucky feeling afterward, but if I use porn, then I feel a certain amount of revulsion. I guess what I'm noticing is that if it feels like the need for intimacy, the feelings are better or not quite as unpleasant. But when I use porn it's also because I've decided to let go of my self-control and give in to a more powerful compulsion, so probably my brain is far more stimulated, which could account for the stronger reaction afterward.
  • The most striking thing I noticed after stopping porn was how difficult it was to masturbate without visual stimuli. I think that's what I'd say to the person who wants to give up porn but continue masturbating. You may not want to, or be able to, masturbate without porn. For about a month after giving up porn, I really couldn't get hard enough to masturbate, and when I "forced" it my orgasms were pretty unsatisfying. Fortunately, sex with my wife improved pretty quickly after I went on my porn fast. So I didn't miss masturbation all that much.

Here's another guy with an excellent account of the differences between masturbation with and without porn:

In the last four weeks since my realization that PMO was a far-too-impairing part of my life, I have relapsed twice, and made new discoveries about myself, even my past sexual issues.

Almost two weeks into my first time without PMO, I went through enormous sexual tension. One night I writhed in bed, aching to touch myself or look at something arousing. My body was in high hormonal gear, and I thought the experience would make me orgasm spontaneously! When I awoke the next morning, I had not wet dreamt, nor did I feel the 'buzz' I always had after a PMO session. But I knew one thing: my body was crying out for sex. Real sex.

This is where things are more difficult, seeing as I'm not in a relationship. So I tried something completely different - M and O without P - something I've never considered. I've never even had real sex, so how was this supposed to work?

Two days later, I added the P to the MO on a whim and relapsed.

The two experiences were so vastly different. Just MO was almost shocking at the finale, because I had no buzz, no shift of perception. It turned out to be a sweet, invigorating feeling.

The full PMO session felt like I was totally on a DRUG. Every picture turned my body into a searing blast of tension, each new one more powerful than the last. I felt almost like a "dope surge" run from my brain through my body.Suddenly I could hear and feel EVERYTHING more intensely. Then it was like a cloud of idiocy swept over my being, and everything went numb. That feeling lasted FOREVER. Like, two days at least.

Reading about all this stuff here on YBOP was one thing, but experiencing it, and actually having the chance to NOTICE... That was really enlightening.

At the bottom of the page is an excerpt from a book that discusses masturbation without fantasy.

Finally, a friendly warning from a guy who tried to incorporate masturbation-without-porn too soon in the rebooting process:

I ended my 2nd attempt a few days ago and went on a 3-day porn binge. My 1st attempt lasted around 30 days and my 2nd attempt ended at 45 days. The relapse after the 2nd attempt was very discouraging and caused me to completely waste a weekend, but I'm back to give it another shot.

On the first two attempts, I only eliminated porn. I continued to have sex and still masturbated occasionally, but less frequently than before. Masturbation led to my demise both times and drastically impeded recovery since it seems to be a gateway to porn relapse.

I would decide to 'masturbate once just to release tension.' This would go OK, so I would decide to do it again a few days later. But, porn fantasies would creep back into my head on the second attempt and I would end up masturbating to visually intense thoughts. The next time, I would start looking at sexually suggestive images online while masturbating. I convinced myself that it wasn't porn, so it was fine.

As you can guess, the next time I decided to masturbate, I ended up on an full-fledged porn binge. So, this time will be a complete abstinence from porn, masturbation, and sex.

Here's what one guy said (who successfully rebooted, thought he would be able to use porn again...and ended up caught in his addiction again for months):

I would not mind masturbating if it's inevitable. But it must be without porn. I am now afraid of binging if I use porn. I already know from my recent experience that if I masturbate while watching porn, I would do it continuously for days. The "chaser effect" is gonna be very strong.

Comments

"Below is an excerpt from a book that discusses masturbation without fantasy."

where is the excerpt?

it's the link at the bottom of the article - "Think About Genitals, Not Scenarios"

Hello, I've been addicted to all kind of porn, but one kind of porn that I will have a hard time forgeting is the one that I made myself.

Is it possible to have a few masturbate session per month to my own movies if I can manage to stay out of my old habbits?

I would say that I had ED before, because I could jerk off to a movie without even being hard. And many times when I stayed with girls I couldn't get hard without viagra, and sometimes that didn't even work.

Im on day 5 atm on my reboot and when the reboot is done, I still want to be able and look at my old pictures and movies from past girl friends. so Will I be able to do that if I can keep it in moderation ?

We have no rules, only suggestions gathered by the experts - former porn addicts.

I wouldn't worry about what you might or might not do in the future. Make that decison after you feel fully rebooted and healthy. I suggest staying focused on your rebooting process.

Be aware that asking that question indicates that your addict brain is trying to negotiate a way to get what it wants - "its not porn, because I'm watching me.....or girlfirends".