Age 25 - 1 year: A better boyfriend & a better man. Increased level of intimacy

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couple sharing a strawberryAfter a full year of NoFap I have learned a few things about myself and this community on the whole. So I've decided to post my thoughts a bit and answer any questions people may have.

Q: Did NoFap really give you superpowers?

A: Sadly, No. NoFap has instead helped me become a better boyfriend and a better male though. My level of intimacy with my girlfriend of 1.5 years has been much stronger since I started and stuck with NoFap. I found myself wanting and desiring her as a person and not just as an idealized fantasy shaped by pornography. As you become unattached to Porn you start to realize how much it really has shaped your perception of women and sex in general.

Q: Why Do NoFap to begin with?

A: I started NoFap because I had long been secretly ashamed of my addiction. I had rationalized it's existence by thinking that "everyone does it, it's normal." When in truth, it really isn't something a healthy male needs to do. A well-adjusted healthy male fills his need to be intimate and desired through human companionship in meaningful relationships and in-turn you realize that they in turn need you back.

Q: What Advice can you give to someone new to NoFap or thinking about starting?

A: When I started NoFap a year ago it was a community of not quite 10,000 and now its nearly 5 times that amount. Use the community and talk about how you feel, why you Fap, and what you can do to help break your addiction. One of my greatest motivations to keep my streak going, especially when I was very tempted, was the shame I knew I would feel when I had to reset my badge counter that I hard worked so hard to build. The quote that has stuck with me the most throughout this whole experience is, "Dont give up what you want, for what you want RIGHT NOW"

Q: What's Next?

A: Well, for me the next step is to keep going one day at a time and realize that even a year in, the temptation to succumb is still there. Yes, it does get easier as time passes, but the urge to revert to your old self will probably never go away. I hope to harness the habits and discipline I have obtained from this experience to be a better boyfriend, father, and, hopefully one day, husband.

Thank you to everyone who has supported me this past year, to this community for realizing that I wasn't alone in my addiction, and any potential readers of this who find even the smallest bit of help in the things I have learned.

If you have any questions or comments feel free to post them below or privately message me if you are more comfortable that way. Best of luck Fapstronauts and stay strong!

LINK - My Experiences 1 Year Later

by Aznfeatherstone


 

INITIAL POST - The Start of My NoFap Journey

I discovered this subreddit earlier today and it intrigued me. I read through the FAQ and watched a couple of the videos and instantly understood. I was thinking about post this on a throwaway, but I realized it was finally time to own up to what it really is...... an addiction.

I started like most guys and discovered porn through secret means in my early teens, but I didn't really understand what the point was. It wasn't until I discovered masturbation and shortly thereafter pornography. Getting my own computer and eventually unfettered access to the internet only exacerbated my growing addiction. I rationalized it as just teenage hormones and that it was normal for me to do it everyday sometimes multiple times in the same day.

I have been in a long-term relationship that lasted over 5 years and even got married and even that did not end my addiction. I always just assumed that my "need" to masturbate was because I wasn't in a stable sexual relationship, but I eventually found that the urge and allure was still there even when I was in loving sexual relationship. I just rationalized as it being "normal" and "supplementary," but I have always secretly been ashamed of my base desires. I assumed that I would eventually just mature out of it and that maybe if I found the right relationship I just wouldn't feel the urges anymore.

I'm 25 years old now have met a wonderful girl whom I care deeply about. We have been dating for nearly 5 months now and I feel extremely optimistic about our future as a couple. We haven't engaged in intercourse yet as we are being very deliberate about it and she's a virgin, but we are being intimate in other ways (read: oral/mutual masturbation) I feel fulfilled by our contact, but when shes not around I find myself falling prey to the same urges and find myself slipping into old habits. I told her about my problems, but I downplayed what it really was and she didn't seem surprised, but I still felt dirty.

After discovering this community today I have decided to take control of myself and conquer my base desires. I know I will probably fail somewhere along the line, but I am finally owning up to what I really have..... an addiction.

tl;dr: Been masturbating for the last 15 years, finally decided to quit.