120 days - A stud is born :-), increased motivation & social interaction
Brothers and sisters, I am transmuting. To experience the true power of NoFap, use it is as a catalyst for complete transmutation. Since NoFap, not only have I stopped masturbating, but I have channeled my sexual energy into other tasks:
- Increased diligence at work
- Increased social interaction (with girls, guys, old ladies, homeless dudes, babies!)
- 36 and counting straight days of running and lifting
- Pushing myself to do things that previously made me uncomfortable
- Appreciating life and taking things as they come
Since I started taking NoFap seriously in early November, I made a vow that I would not cut the hair on my face or head until I felt I had conquered my addiction. I now have an epic four-month-old beard and sweep my long hair out of my eyes. It is a constant reminder of my struggle. Jealous guys give me shit and call me a hobo, a terrorist, etc. I could care less because my confidence level is at 9000 fng (fucks not given).
On Friday, I went to a bar with a group of friends. One of my friends (let's call her Britney) had brought a friend (let's call her Anna) from out of town that was visiting the area for the weekend. Anna would normally be a girl I would be too afraid to talk because of how attractive she is or because I would be worried of what Britney might think, but I no longer have such stupid thoughts any more. I flirted with her hard and I could tell she was into it.
On Saturday, I went to a party because Britney and Anna told me they were going. I made my move and took Anna home the night of day 28/morning of day 29. The sex was crazy. I made her breakfast the next morning. Britney came to pick her up and was so flabbergasted she could barely speak to me.
On Sunday, I got a call from Anna inviting me over to dinner. We double dated with Britney and her boyfriend. I took Anna home again. I only got 2 hours of sleep sandwiched between many more hours of sex!
On Monday morning, Anna left to fly back home. She practically begged me to come and visit her soon.
On Monday night, my best friend invited me over for dinner. Word had already gotten around. At one point he went to use the bathroom, and his girlfriend came up to me and said "You have become the biggest player in the department. Girls are swarming over you" while playfully touching my shoulder!
Ladies and gentlemen, the results I am seeing are insane, more than I could have ever imagined possible. All of this because I now grab life by the balls instead of diddling with my own. You can do it too.
INITIAL POST - My story of PMO and more
Hello everyone, it is truly an honor to join such a wonderful community. My story is very similar to the many already described. My infatuation with P started when I was twelve years old when I saw images with some classmates in the computer lab of our middle school. I've been PMOing daily or more ever since.
I am an introvert and have trouble keeping friends. People seem to like me well enough, but I often times don't feel the motivation to keeping up friendships and socializing. It seems like such a chore and being alone seems easier. PMO keeps me comfortable in my isolation.
I've always done very well in school. I recently graduated from a top 10 university at the top of my class. Academics have always been the focus of my life and still are now that I'm in graduate school. I've rationalized PMO as a way to help me "focus" during my studies. I'd say "just a 20 minute PMO break and then I'll go back to work."
In college, I was in one long-term relationship (3+ years). She initiated and asked me out. I went along for the ride. Romantically and sexually, it was abysmal. I PMO'd behind her back regularly. She only stayed with me because of her own insecurities and because I provided her with much needed emotional support. I moved 2000 miles away from my home and family to go to graduate school with her close to her home. After a month together in graduate school, she left me for another guy. I went into PMO-aided depression. Even my passion for academics began to fade.
Somehow, I have persevered and am still in the early stages of graduate school at the same school. I have since been in one relationship (lasted 5 months) with a girl I met online. Sexually, it was more than any guy could want. She wore me completely out as we performed the deed 2-3 times a night. But somehow I still PMO'd regularly. I felt empty. Intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally, we did not click. I knew this going in to the relationship but stayed for the sex. It took me 3 months to gain the courage to break up with her. She was in love with me, but I could not reciprocate.
After I broke up with this second girlfriend, I realized that something in my outlook had be severely twisted and maligned ever since I could remember. I had just had access to all of the sex I could ever want and yet was unhappier than ever. She was the living version of the P with which I was so enamored, yet neither she nor the P satisfied me. I began to realize that sex for sex's sake in our society is totally overrated. I needed something more, both in myself and in my partner.
This is when I began considering NoFap. I began taking it seriously in November. I have relapsed several times since then, but think I finally have the willpower to abstain for very long periods of time. Here are some things that I have noticed while trying to break through more than two weeks of abstaining (currently at day 18 which is my personal record).
- MINDSET: Blocking access to P did not work for me. I just became obsessed with trying to get around the various complicated blocks I would set up and this just got me wanting P more. Instead, I am trying to adopt the “P is not an option” attitude.
- IMPLEMENTATION: It is easier for me to give up P, if I give up M and O completely. Edging makes things horrible and always leads to M then O then PMO cycles. I have adopted a no touching policy with regards to my nether regions. This has helped me a lot. If I touch at all, I have it in my head that this is a failure and I will have to reset my counter.
- CONTIGENCY: Any time I have a bad urge, I come here for motivation and distraction.
- MEDIA: I threw away my TV. Too many triggers and it’s full of crap anyways.
- SYMBOLISM: Since I started taking NoFap seriously in November, I also made a pledge to not shave or cut my hair during my personal transformation. Every time I look in the mirror, I have a powerful reminder of what I am trying to accomplish. Acquaintances make wry remarks about my beard and these, too, are daily reminders of my pledge.
- SUPPORT: I confided in a friend about my problem. He knows if I shave any time soon, something went wrong.
- HEALTH: My urge for sexual relief is heightened if I am tired or hungry so I try to eat well. I need to start exercising.
- SOCIALIZING: Girls are disappointed that I don’t talk to them. I am beginning to notice that with my coworkers. I still need to man up and start talking to them. I need to improve here.
- SELF: I am planning not to be in another relationship for at least 90 days, maybe longer. No sex during this time either. I need to figure out myself first. I need confidence. I need to erase my intellectual and social bankruptcy.
- DISCIPLINE: I am trying to adopt discipline in other aspects of my life now that I can see that it is possible not to PMO and there are so many obvious benefits. I have devised a strict daily regimen which includes waking up early, meditating, exercising, and reading. I am current struggling to implement this new schedule.
I am excited to see where my journey takes me now that I have embarked. Thank you all for this wonderful program. I am so grateful I found you all.