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It is probably safer to stop reading them entirely. Since some authors don't always lable the scenes and it was probably one of the reasons it got me in this mess the first place. Thank you for your advice

If you have a girlfriend and you get an erection focusing only on her and she is the cause is it okay to have sex? I understand the reboot is to remove the association of watching/reading porn online on a computer. But if it's with a girl and you both weren't watching porn would it be alright?

the rebooting basics?  http://yourbrainonporn.com/node/79

and - START HERE: Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction

We discuss the pros and cons

Is it okay to watch non erotic anime or tv? Or books? Will it set me back if I were to watch hours of tv/anime or read a book for hours?

I'm not sure why you would think movies or books would cause a problems. See -

What stimuli must I avoid during my reboot (did I relapse)?

Sorry I discovered this site 7/6/13 and been PMO free since then. Feel a little odd and my focus is off. Plus I am a little anxious and when that happens I ask a lot of questions and worried a lot. Thank you for your advice and for the site

Sorry for all the questions I'm just very interested in this topic. I'm sure like usual there is no simple answer to this, but is the lack of emotions porn users suffer from that has been recently discussed (that I have first hand experience of) something seen in all addictions (such as gambling, alcohol, cocaine), or is it something specific to porn, or at least is the extremity of it something specific to porn?

what is different is that most users who show up on YBOP grew up using internet porn. It may be the result of spending one's adolescence addicted, or sexually conditioned by porn.

I just started my reboot! I want to get sexual with real woman so i've found this great website called girlschase. It gives the best dating advice i have ever seen ( with it, i have become a better man) it real is a site that teach you how to be seductive with real woman ( not the pc :p).Also, i know this great site called peaktestosterone. It tells you how to boost libido, better erection, improve testosterone, etc naturally.

David Edge

I am 51 and have been hooked on porn since I was 13. In my life I met amazing women that would have been my companions for life if it had not been for my addiction. The realization that gradually I could not perform anymore unless I watched porn was heart braking and couldn't figure out why.
Having real sex become a chore and had to get kinkier and kinkier in order to get aroused... as per the porn I was watching.
I was not having sex with a person but with fantastic images on a screen where there were no limits.
If I could think it, I could find it!
Eventually I could not have sex with a real person anymore... my mind was not there. I tried Viagra and even though it initially worked with a strange feeling of having sex but not actually being there, it too stopped working.
What was wrong with me? I went to many doctors and everything was fine. I spend years trying to find the reason and couldn't find any until I found this site; it all made sense and could finally take action... just wished I would have known before because I broke the heart of many lovely women unaware of the real reason.
Porn seemed harmless enough and if anything sneaked up on you as a pleasant escape from the harshness of real life.
Whenever I was over stressed, anxious or depressed I would go to it and immediately found my perceived world of happiness and pleasure. It became my escape and how could it possibly be bad for me.
The fact is that it is not real; it is fictitious! I was staring for hours on end at a monitor that is not alive and can't love.
II found this site and became very angry; porn had robbed me of many years that could have been filled with meaningful relationships.
Because of this anger it was very easy for me to give up PMO... I detest it because I CRAVE LOVE with a real person.
30 days with no PMO and have experienced absolutely no desire even though I get morning erections.
When I am over stressed I feel the compulsion for it to alleviate the tension inside me but am certain that I will never go there again.
I have been meditating visualizing being with a real woman in the hope of changing the pattern for what I should be aroused to... it seems to be slowly working. I need to retrain my brain.
Since I stopped PMO the worst are my bouts of anxiety, depression and extreme fatigue. I find myself lying in bed with no desire, motivation or wanting to do anything because I am denying myself my fix.
It feels like my brain got so used to it that it is now starving for it; it is not getting the Dopamine rush.
I am confident things will gradually improve and readjust itself to what is normal.

I'm 38 years old and can remember different sexual thoughts started at 17, interestingly the birth of the Internet. But it wasn't until 4 years later I discovered Internet Porn.

I'm dealing with a lot of addictions, but nothing that isn't manageable, from cigarettes, marijuana and compulsive sexual thoughts. My sex addiction takes up a lot of hours in most days, some days maybe an hour to several hours a day.

I enjoy being humiliated publicaly on my webcam. I was in a relationship for 2.5 years with a woman where we lived a cuckold relationship. She would have sex with other men, and we'd seek out men to dominate her and humiliate me. I had the chance to live out most fantasies you'd find online. Our last night I was tied in a cage, fed alcohol, left to pee on myself while she was intimate with my neighbor.

This created a worldwind of emotion for both of us. We broke off that night, a month ago. While we had sex twice a day, I numbed my pain with masturbation and explored online humiliation again. I would pay women to humiliate me. I'm to the point that the humiliation needs to be more, I'm degrading myself, asking for my name and phone to be shared. I'm on the verge of asking for blackmail, perhaps through my facebook group.

I'm a single dad. I have a marketing company. I'm a published author and I'm on the verge of ruining it all with my sexual fantasies. I feel like I can't stop, for very long. Once I relapse, I'm full on. I'm spending my days away from the office at home, hoping to find a girl to humiliate me.

I'm going to win. I have no choice anymore. I'm not happy. I'm depressed, I have little motivation. I cry. I feel shame. I feel worthless. I feel these things, even though I know I'm a great father, great friend and good at business. But I feel them.

I just know there are people are happy. Couples who truly love each other, bring each other up.

I am THANKFUL for this site, right now i'm addicted to this site. I'm thankful for these resources and that I'm not the only one. Thank You.

the forums under the support tab? Lots of resources there. It's rare to have anyone answer a comment, other than me.

Good luck

I'm 29 years old and my fiancee and I have been together for 9 years. During the entire course of our relationship, we have never had any issues in the bed room. In fact, it's been pretty awesome. I've been able to give her multiple orgasms and last very long. Until........

Recently, for a little bit over a month now, we have been having issues in the bed room. It first happened at the beginning of last month when I lost my erection when we were about to start having sex. I panicked. And we were obviously both upset by the situation. So we tried again a day or two later. Only this time I lasted maybe 5 minutes at the most. There were a few more times we attempted to have sex within the month and it was the same story. Either I lost my erection and/or ejaculated too early, and left her unsatisfied.

Anxiety overcame me. I scoured the internet for answers. I thought "what if I have to start taking viagra?" or "what if I have some medical condition causing this?". However, to make a long story short, I found porn was the cause of my problems. I've been masturbating to porn on and off since my early teens. Never before has it affected me, until now. It's not like I had the uncontrollable urge to masturbate to porn. It's just a lot of times when I'm home a alone I would just do it out of boredom. Not because I was horny or needed to get off. I would do it more when my fiancee's work schedule would get busy and work long hours. 2 years of our relationship were long distance, so I spent A LOT of time looking and porn and masturbating then.

Anyway, I read much information about rebooting, and I'm doing it now. I'm a highly motivated individual. I've been eating healthier and hitting the gym hard. I haven't masturbated or looked at porn for over a week now. I haven't had the urge or temptation. However, I think I'm in my flatline phase. I have no sex drive right now at all and that bothers me because I want to start having sex again. I did wake up with morning wood yesterday though which I haven't in awhile (celebrate small victories I guess). I'm just curious as to how long this flatline phase is going to last and if I should go to a doctor or not.

I'm just curious as to how long this flatline phase is going to last and if I should go to a doctor or not.

Everyone should see a doctor, and there's no pattern to the flatline. It's the most unpredictable part of the reboot.

Today full 7 days. This period of abstinence is driving me crazy. I can not even sleep. I feel weak and worried. It is a symptom of addiction? Excuse my English, I'm not American.

Hii... everyone here. My slight background is I'm 32 years old and started watching porn when I was just about 15 years old and had been milking my bull since then. I would fap for may be 4-5 times a day till I realised that I had developed a severe ED and PE. I attempted sex 10's times but failed even to wake up my bull. I went to see a urologist ..he started with Viagra but nothing ever happened. he ordered a bunch of tests like T levels but all were fine. He said every thing is fine and it is all your performance anxiety. I told him that I had been fapping like a monster but he said it has nothing to do with my ED. Few weeks ago while searching on internet I came across this site and immediately started NO PMO. I'm on 43RD day of NO PMO. I haven't entered into any flatline kind of thing but have been feeling horny as hell with lots of urge to M but not to P. I can feel erections all the day even while working but they are weak. I can feel semi erected (sometimes like 50%) almost any time of the day and huge sexual urge. out of this I tried to have sex using Cialis few days ago . the erections were better than before like 40% bt came to know I have developed severe PE. Last thing ..last night I had big urge to M (to a real partner)and I almost edged out . Few good things that happened are like I had few morning woods and mid-night woods but they are weak.Please help me out..

on YBOP. I suggest looking under the support tab for fourms.

Good luck

Have a case here of someone who managed to get rid of the addiction and now has a normal sex life?

Dear Sir,

I would like to express my gratitude towards you for all the work you have put into this website. I am a 23 years old man and I have been watching porn on a regular basis for around a half of my life. I come from Europe and as it turns out - Internet may bring both bad things and good things across continents :) My story is perfectly typical. When I first came across your website, I was shocked by the amount of parallels I found between what I've been doing and the porn addiction scheme you're describing. My quest for no porn-induced ED started bit less than a year ago. I once relapsed for a quick while, but got back on right track. It's been tough, but with sheer determination and support from my girlfriend and your site, I'm making it happen. Let me share my story, as for me - first 3 months was just the beginning. I hope word of encouragement reaches whoever struggles right now - hold on, be strong!

I was first exposed to porn in as young as 10. I would sometimes watch soft porn that was played late at night on public TV. I remember I was actually planning on saving money to buy video recorder to store it :) But soon there was no need. Since I was 13, I was connected to a proper internet cable. Pretty much from then on, I would regularly watch porn. Sometimes it was once or twice a week, sometimes 2-3 times a day. I would actually be considered a social teenager, played lots of sports and hang out with popular kids. My body has always been in great shape, too. I had no luck with girl though. There is no doubt in my mind it was influenced by porn. Busting my nut so frequently meant I had no necessary drive. When I turned 20 or so, normal porn didn't turn me on so much. I frequently turned into shemale or gay porn - again a typical behavior from what I've read. I felt ashamed instantly after orgasm. It's not I'm against gay people, I just knew that wasn't my sexual taste.

I felt attracted to women on the streets, but I somehow didn't manage to find a proper one. I would sometimes meet with a fine woman over a coffee, but it would all finish before it had started. I never had sex until last year, when I finally met my current girlfriend. When after a while it became intimate... You guess what happened. Stone-cold ED. I can't describe how did un-manly that felt. I was depressed and strived for answers. I then suspected it might be porn-induced. I thought of dumping porn on numerous occasions, but I then I thought "why would I?". Now my reason was good enough. I googled it and found your site. It all made sense.

I decided to tell her about my problems and found her really supportive. But I was struggling nonetheless. After a week of no masturbation I began having typical addiction withdrawal symptoms. My head would hurt, I would become irritated, my urge to wank was at it's limits. I found relief in exhaustive exercise, whether it was running or gym. I sometimes went to sleep sooner than usual, I wasn't struggling so much at sleep and usually it felt better in the morning. I made through this period because I simply made up my mind. I would often repeat Rorschach's "Never surrender" quote. It pumped up my agression and that helped as well.

The withdrawal symptoms ceased a lot after a month or two, but my ED wasn't yet gone. It took me much longer than usual 3 months - presumably because pixels were the only sexual stimulus I got for 10 years or so. Once it was better and we had good sex, at other times we still struggled. I've felt true progress since a month or so, not only physically, but at last... the smell, my girlfriend's cute body, her heat, the feel of our skins touching... That turns me on as well. And yes, I relapsed for about two weeks in a process. I would be so turned on by internet porn I could cum without even touching my penis. Of course, porn escalated very quickly, too. [My sexual perfomance dropped for a while, of course.] That was scary, now that I think about it. But I'm glad I stopped again. It just reminds me I'm like an alcoholic. I will probably never be able to enjoy porn any more. For me it's like a poison and I have to stay away. I'm not saying others should do the same - I guess it's just me who's so susceptible to porn addiction. I'm glad I'm aware of my weakness, though. And believe me - the idea of opening my favorite porn sites was sprung my mind numerous times this month. But now that I have some perspective and know I can withstand my cravings and that I become so intimate with my woman - it's easier than ever.

for writing your story. I've placed it on the rebooting accounts page, here - http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/age-23-porn-induced-ed-escalated-gay-tran...

Questions - how long was your reboot? Anything else you want to add to it?

To be honest, I don't think I'm quite there yet. It's been nearly a year and I suspect it will still take months from now to reach my "porn performance", the quality of erections that I used to have watching porn etc. Maybe this will never happen. Maybe porn is just "too good to be true" kind of thing. Or maybe it will get even better :) I don't know and it's not that important for me. I'm not going to be a porn star and as long as I can share those intimate moments with my partner, express my arousal, all is fine. I don't have strict expectations. I don't count days in my calendar. I don't parent-block my internet connection. I simply made up my mind, stick to it (for most of the time) and reap the benefits :)

I am 35 and have always enjoyed great sex with my wife but lately i have been suffering ED from porn addiction . I know it is from this since when during my long term studies I have been without my wife and I was stuck to porn everyday and masturbations. After coming across this great website of yours I recognize exactly my addiction in many of you. I am now rebooting and very determined … no porn , no masturbation but my question is can I still have sex with my wife and try orgasm even though i am rebooting?

Porn-induced ED recovery involves so many variables that YBOP can only generalize. We don't have rules. Our generalizations are in the START HERE ARTICLE - START HERE: Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction

Guys your age who did not use high speed at a young can usually get away with orgasms with a partner, and still recover in a reasonable time. But there are no guarantees.

best of luck to you

 

Thanks a lot for your quick reply . I shall certainly take the advices on board. All the best to you all.

Hi everyone. I think the subject pretty much explains a lot about me. The thing is I have been trying to get rid of porn forever (seriously forever and ever!) and I always fail. My longest time has been 21 days without porn and I started to see the benefits, but I lost my way. Anyway, I have joined this website to receive some advice and to help others (as I have intent to do) overcome this addiction.

You hate to start over? Then STOP QUITTING

It is unlikely that anyone will answer your post...other than me. YBOP doesn't have a forum, so few people stick around. I suggest looking under the support tab above for active forums.

good luck

I can not stop. Stopped 16 days, was the maximum. My life is horrible and I do not know where to go.
I'm an attractive guy, so many girls call me for sex and I have no desire or leaving home, my life sucks and I do not get excited me just seeing a naked woman.

I'm thinking about leaving college, work and disappear into the world, or commit me to some clinic for crazy, I do not know.

16 days was a great start. If it were easy to quit, they wouldn't call it "addiction."

Keep in mind that the stress from quitting gets worse for several weeks, due to neurons sprouting in your brain and other changes...as your brain tries to go back to this "valuable" activity. Read this for more:

What does withdrawal from porn addiction look like?

Remember, discouragement is the addicted brain's most potent "rationalization" for rushing back to the addiction. So don't fall for it.

Get some support. You might like these guys' vids:  http://www.youtube.com/user/NoFapAcademy/videos

It also helps to learn more about what's going on in your brain: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvyejdlmKpE&feature=youtu.be

Stay in college. You'll be feeling better in a matter of weeks if you grit your teeth and get through this. And keep a sense of humor because relapses are not unusual. Read this guy's story, for instance: http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/age-25-ed-cured-no-more-depression-anxiet...

And this link:

http://yourbrainonporn.com/age-19-6-months-i-dont-even-remember-myself-s...

Thanks, I'm trying ... But the memories are very strong. And I think my body got used to take pleasure in this way. Therefore, it is a psychological and physiological strength.
I think I have to stop thinking about sex to save me from addiction. But I think about sex all day. I just have erection when I think of porn. No libido while kissing or when she touches me or just staring at her.

Hello, I'm 20 days of abstinence. I was angry. Some symptoms said here.
have spontaneous erections during the day is good or bad in the recovery phase?

I don't understand your question.

I'm a 19 year old male who up until now had no idea that ED from porn actually existed. I began to masturbate at age 11 and between ages 13-14 began watching high-speed porn. Little did I know that a little later on in life this would make me sexually retarded. Let me tell you, i'm not an ugly kid you would normally pass up. From what I've been told I have looks, as well as fitness. There is nothing that is physically stopping me from performance. Yet one night me and a girl in my math class were in the back of my car kissing touching, the usual. She was beautiful, blonde hair, blue eyes, full package. Yet when the pants came off..so the Johnson did too. This threw me into a spiral of depression and future performance anxiety. Eventually, between smoking plenty of marijuana and watching porn, I began to discover more extreme genres such as gay. Now let me just say that never in my life starting from an early age have I ever liked another boy or man. The butterflies in my stomach always came at the sight of a girl which I have had a few partners, but the ED is so bad that I can only get an erection in sex to a girl way below my standards or just porn. Men were seen only as friends or enemies....but not lovers. Idk what it is that made me look at these videos, but I still feel discusted about it. This fact is what made me come to this website....as a last resort. It's been less then a week, but already i'm determined to rewire this corrupted brain of mine. I don't know how long it's going to take, but i'm willing to not masturbate or view porn(ever again) for a full recovery. I pray that this could be the end of this nightmare

Patrick

So like many people I've picked up a bit weed smoking habit to counter the pain of porn withdrawal. Where as the effect of any other drug seems to be numbed (including alcohol), weed seems to somewhat override the pain of low dopamine.

I've decided to give it up for about three weeks and I'm currently on five days and feeling better than I have for a while after a few days of feeling worse than usual, is it possible that excessive cannabis smoking can slow down recovery from porn addiction? Is this a good thing for me to be doing?

Hey all, this is my first post but I figured I would share my story as reading everyone elses has been really useful!

I am a 22 year old guy and have been sexually active since I was 16 and been viewing porn regularly since I was 18. From the age of 18 until mid way through 22 I was in a long-term relationship and so was extremely sexually active but also masturbated to porn in spare time. I could maintain erections and did not have many problems but thinking back on it, my erections were getting weaker slowly and my porn interests were becoming more specific.

Anyway, the real problem began after this relationship ended about 6 months ago. I retreated into myself and began to rely on porn for comfort and was masturbating without even getting proper erections and doing this at twice a day! I didn't really seem to care until I met another girl about 3 months ago and began to start being sexually active again. The first night with this girl, I suffered from ED for the first time in my life but put it down to nerves however I decided to slow down on masturbating and porn and see if that helped. After about 3 weeks, I saw her again and had better erections and great sex. However, later that week, still on a high from having great sex, I used porn to get off and then my libido just seemed to disappear and I got really freaked out. I failed two nights in a row with the new girl I was seeing and was getting extremely worried.

Then I came across this site and everything was explained. Since then (about a month ago) I have avoided all porn and self-masturbation and only orgasmed with my new GF. I am regaining my erections but still suffering from some ED and major mood swings and fatigue. It has been an interesting journey and far from over but this site has been extremely useful and a constant comfort!

Dear all,

I have seen some great success stories here. I hope I can be one too.
My willpower is questionnable but I have definitely notice rewards from abstinence.
I am unfortunately in a sticky situation. I have been married for 10 months, to a university sweetheart. We met at 19. Like people of this age the sex was great and plentiful. But i noticed I never came. I had to resort to finishing myself off. This was never a problem then. I was also always hard. I worked out a lot/healthy etc. I did however start watching porn at 18. There was less then, I am 29 now. But like any teenage I fanstasised a healthy amount and when I had a girlfriend I decreased use. The issue was I did a difficult degree (medicine) and when not in class/revising i used porn as stress relief, as well as being with my gf. The degree is 6 years and towards the end I was not getting as hard, less turned on. I still fancied her but masturbating to porn and ejaculating that way was more satisfying. Last year I married this girl. We have had relationship difficulties for other reasons but we pulled through and I thought this would be it. Since being married I can count the number of times I have had sex. They have all been after a period of abstinence. The longest I have abstained from no FAP is 3 and a half weeks. It was terribly difficult but my wife noticed how intimate I was. I was hard all the time....but struggled to ejaculate.

I feel I have often used porn as an antidepressant/stress relif and when I want to procrastinate. However no matter how patient my wife is I want to please her and myself through real regular sex, we are still both young. For some people porn can be used in healthy amounts but for me, I think I am passed that. Therefore I am going cold turkey tomorrow and need all the help I can get. I find this really difficult but I want reality like life was 15 years ago. Our predecessors had more real sex than we do because there was none of this hi-speed streaming porn bullshit. I want resal love and real sex.

cheers
determined to recover

strugglingmarriage

So don't get discouraged. Try not to force your sexual performance, as it can slow things down. She may find this helpful:

Boyfriend Quitting Porn? 5 Tips | Your Brain On Porn

And here's some inspiration:

Guys Who Gave Up Porn: On Sex and Romance | Your Brain On Porn

Good luck!

I just found out about a week ago that the ED problems my 19 year old boyfriend was experiencing are porn induced. He had always hidden his problem from me, and this was the first I was hearing that he even watched porn at all. He has accepted that he has an addiction, and has decided to go through the reboot process. The thing is, there are always so many resources and blogs out there for the person going through the problem, and not so many for the significant other. So I started a blog that will track our process (he consented to the idea) and just typing out what's happening has really helped me get through these past few days. I was wondering if you could include my blog in the blogs link on the left side of the page. It could hopefully help the people going through the problem understand what their significant other is feeling through the process, and maybe help the significant others feel some sense of not being alone. Please get back to me on this, I really just want to be able to help people get through this.

Hi,

That blogs section is new, and only has a few people who have long since rebooted, like Gabe. We also have a section where I have traditionally placed ongoing blogs - http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/external-rebooting-blogs-threads

 

Do you think you could take a look at putting mine there? I took a glance and there doesn't seem to be much for the significant other on there. I don't mean to seem pushy.

First, those blogs are by people who have been blogging elsewhere and helping others for years. Their blogs are few and far between and only occur when they have something useful to say on a specific subject.  It's a new experiment, and the blogs are not recovery journals. Each blog post automatically goes to the front page. If we allowed individual recovery journals on YBOP, our front page would soon look like nofap - http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/

We have purposely avoided having a forum, and having journals that chronicle individual's journey's. If you haven't already set up the journal (wordpress, for example), I would suggest visiting a few of the forums under the support tab that do have journal capability.

Just to let you know, there are partner support sites under the support tab. Again, I can place a link to your blog on this page once you have it up and running - http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/external-rebooting-blogs-threads

 

I have no problem with being put on the external rebooting blogs page (that is what I was talking about in the last post). I do have it up and running through weebly.com. Do you want me to post a link here?

Yes post the link.

Here's the link and I just want to thank you for all that you've done. This website is what has really helped my boyfriend and I understand what we have ahead of us. I really appreciate it. http://crazyjourney.weebly.com/

I'm on 103 days (been trying this for years but this is by far my longest streak) and my emotions have really started to come back recently, it's at times nice but at times incredibly painful. Some OCD thoughts pop in now and then and those are the ones I really can't stand. I know it's different for everyone, but do you know in general how near the end this kind of stuff happens? Could it be just a few more days or weeks?

be aware that this occurs with other types of addictions (probably not cigarettes) where the addiction has greatly impacted your life. That is, emotions, dreams, thoughts will come and go for a long time. It's as if one is processing the effects.

im 20 years old, and have only recently discoverd this problem when i got a girlfriend after many years, i wouldnt say im addicted to porn but i do enjoy it often, though when i was younger 15+ i did watch alot of porn and masterbate alot, sometimes once a day, someitmes five, it never escalated to "worse" porn, but i do have many symptoms such as ejaculating whlst semi erect, and only getting a erection briefly while masterbating, does this sound like porn induced ed?, i have tried to stop masterbating but find it quite hard, i also cannot simply tink what else could cause this as it wasnt a problem when i was younger and with former gfs at ages 14-16, someone please give me some advise, thanks.

for everyone -

1) see a urologist to eliminate physical causes

2) Reboot. Eliminate porn and porn fantasy. Some guys also drastically reduce masturbation.

 

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