Age 16 - (ED). Good news: Over HOCD; Bad news: I keep jumping back to porn

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JUNE 13, 2014

Ok so I remember last summer I was in tears over the thought that I was Gay not in my own choosing because I got hard when I saw or thought about dicks. This was just porn and after many succesful days for about half a year this went away. Now I am at the stage where even if I try to think about dicks or homosexual situations, nothing happens. This is good news and things were going great with girls.

However now that I am not at the rock bottom I was last summer, I cannot find the motivation to keep going and quit porn, for I still have some ED troubles that I know will go away if I did my 60-70 days w/o MO and quit porn all together.

Problem is in someways life has been harsh on me and I keep jumping back to porn, I don't want to go back to the way things were last summer. Can someone give me some advice or motivaiton as to how i can start my streak again and actually quit porn for good ?

Thanks so much

LINK - Good news OVER HOCD and bad news, need some help :/

BY - Rusescu


 

INITIAL POST: 8/15/13

Anyone else thought they were gay because of PI ED?

So I'm still a teen. But I had this one gay encounter and I hated myself and never forgave myself. However I probably did this because I couldn't get hard around girls and at the thought of them. I've always loved girls , only ever dated them and have had 4 girlfriends overall. However was failed to be sexually fulfilled by them, could never get hard enough. All this makes me very deeply upset, because these gay thoughts and constant memories would constantly make me hard, I even was more turned on by gay porn. I've heard this is the dopamine that get's bored of always watching straight porn and makes you watch more twisted things, heck at one point it was so bad I was watching animal porn. I feel so terribly ashamed.

I managed 2 weeks without PMO ( a lot for me as I'm used to it everyday ) I didn't have gay thoughts and relapsed to a picture of a really hot girl. But i had to stimulate myself manually to get a full erection even though I could feel myself aroused.

I guess my question is , is anyone else having this trouble and questioning their sexuality? In my heart I've always known I wasn't gay, and that I wanted to get married , have kids. But since PI ED stopping me from doing this, my dick has made me think I'm gay by getting turned on by gay stuff. I hate it...
thanks for reading, it's really very depressing...