Age 19 - This process is about a lot more than just not fapping
Happy Monday everyone! I’ll preface this with a little bio: My name is ojdidit, I am a 19 year-old student athlete at a small liberal arts college, I play football and rugby and have come to really enjoy my study as a math major.
Personal change: When I started nofap at the end of November last year, I was at a low point in my life. I was a depressed, self-conscious virgin (not that that’s a bad thing ;) ). After watching the TED video and starting nofap I noticed an immediate change in my usually disposition within a two weeks, for the first time in a long time I was feeling optimistic and happy. I was even getting comments from my friends like, “Someone’s giddy today” or “Why do you look so happy” (like it was a bad thing ha-ha!). So whilst having urges, I felt like I couldn’t give in as I never wanted to return to that depressed state. This was a period where while I should have been focused on self-improvement, I was much more focused on not relapsing.
Self Improvement: I got to about 30 days when I then made the transition from that mindset of focusing 100% on not relapsing to worrying a lot more about self-improvement and self-actualization. I began reading as a hobby for the first time and began learning a ton about social dynamics with books like “The Game” and “The Art of Seduction” (both of which I would recommend). I slept barely 6 to 7 hours a night, but found myself with way more energy, leading to me being far more productive and finding time for all of my work and plenty of leisure all while taking better care of myself. As an athlete I am an avid weightlifter. I was in shape and committed before nofap, but with nofap I found a new drive, a new gear that I could “shift” and force myself to dig deeper during brutal workouts. I have had tremendous progress in the weight room in the past 90 days and I would love to hear if other nofappers have had a similar feeling. At this point I was still relatively unsuccessful sexually, but it began not to bother me.
Story time: And then came spring break. I was stuck at an airport hotel after mechanical problems had delayed my flight and picked up a girl I had met on the plane (luckily staying at the same hotel). Before nofap, I was absolutely terrified that I would have no idea what I was doing in bed, but at this point (roughly 70 days in) my instincts took over and I had a confidence (and a raging boner) that I had never felt before. And then about five hours after I lost my virginity to a 26 year old, I joined the mile high club with the same girl (we both had the same flight the next morning). I felt like a total badass and carried that confidence into a job interview I had in LA the next day. Killed the interview and got a job for the summer (at a hedge fund!). I also asked a girl out that I had been interested in since high school. All that shit happened in the span of 48 hours, it was pretty fucking crazy.
That’s one of the main themes I want to leave you dudes with, is that instead of waking up obsessing about not fapping, lets make each day an adventure. Each day packed with exciting, even frightful experiences. Lets all push each other to break out of our comfort zones socially, academically, etc. I listened to a lot of Joe Rogan (and London Real – both of which are podcasts I would recommend listening to while doing work or something) and one of the greatest things he’s ever said was, “to be the hero of your own story”. Essentially fuck what other people think and do what you want to do. Have integrity and self-discipline and do what you need to do to accomplish what you find desirable.
While I have made a significant improvement in my life the past few months, I am by no means even close to where I want to be. 50 days ago I would have told you that making it to 90 days would be “the end all be all”, and while its a meaningful accomplishment, it means nothing if I don’t continue to improve myself on a daily basis. That’s another message I want to leave you guys with, is to never stop trying to get better. While nofap has been an amazing community for me the past 4 months, my interests have changed and I have outgrown 95% of the content that reaches the front page. I have graduated in a sense, but I need to thank all of you, for being awesome and for being there for me. I hit some real lows during my journey and nofap was always there for me. I’d like to leave you guys with a quote my dad told me when I was struggling through a really hard workout (my dad was my coach). After I told him I was ready to give up, bending over at the knees, dripping with sweat, my dad told me, “the only time you really reach the bottom is when you stop digging”.
Amen brothers and sisters, its been real
by ojdidit12390 days