Age 20 - Masturbation is a pretty natural behavior, but porn clogs up your brain by super-stimulating it

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So, I finally hit 90 days, here's my full and honest report:

I've been fapping and watching porn for over 7 years. First time I came across porn was when I was 13, I found my brother's hidden stash on our computer. I became aware of fapping after watching a video of a girl jacking off a guy. I've been having erections long before that but never associated an erection to sexuality, I didn't knew anything about sex. Ok sure, I knew sex existed, I knew that men and women had different physiologies and that man and woman could have sexual intercourse, but I didn't imagined masturbation was a thing.

After I saw that video, I added 1 + 1 in my mind and realized I could have "sex" with myself. First times I did it I was actually ashamed of doing it, and mostly afraid I got caught. Over time, porn and masturbation have became a routine.


I've had my first girlfriend and sexual interaction with another human being when I was 18. I found that it was hard (no pun intended) for me to maintain and erection with her. I didn't associated that with my masturbation and porn habits. My vision of sexuality was totally distorted by porn.

At that time, long before I found out about this subreddit, I started abstaining from jacking off. I could go about a week or so without it. It definitely helped with the erectile disfunction issue.


I'm 20 now, and I've been single for the past one and half years. After I went to college, I lost most of my social connection with my high school friends. I've lost my girlfriend about that time too. Me, being the socially awkward guy that I am (actually diagnosed with social anxiety) found myself in a trap: I had no friends and I couldn't make new ones because of my anxiety, I had a very hard time integrating my new group of peers. Since last April, around the time I've found this subreddit, I actually started taking anti-depressives, two months ago, I've tried to kill myself.


I was impressed with all the benefits people described, the so called "super-powers". My longest streak before this one was about 45 days. Now, I finally hit 90. I've always went hard-mode, I'm the "all or nothing" kind of person.

In this 90 days, here's what I've learned:

  • There's no such thing as "super-powers". Nofap won't change your life all by itself, but it will help you fix part of it that's not right
  • My acne didn't cleared up, as so many people claim it would. There's yet to be a study showing if there's any correlation between both.
  • I didn't became an "alpha male", I'm still the socially awkward guy I ever was and I don't think it has anything to do with masturbation.
  • Didn't really experienced a flat line, there were days I woke up with a huge boner and felt really horny throwout the day, there were times I didn't feel horny at all.
  • Never had a wet dream.
  • Your mileage varies a lot!

All this being said, I'm considering going soft-mode from now on and just fap If I ever feel the need to release. We, as humans are sexual beings, masturbation is a pretty natural behavior, as long it's not an obsession. Porn, on the other hand, clogs up your brain by super-stimulating it with fake images of what sexuality is not.

TLDR: finally hit 90 days, always keep in mind that your mileage my vary!

LINK - [90 days report] My longest streak ever

by kurocat


 

UPDATE - 111 days report

Hi guys,

So, it has been 111 days since I last fapped. 111 days on hard mode. I don't have a girlfriend, but that's not why I started this challenge.

111 days ago, I decided I wanted to change. I've been battling a depression for almost a year now, last September, I tried to kill myself. I hit rock bottom, life seem really pointless. Trying to end my life was, though, an enlightening moment. I realized there was more to life than feeling miserable about myself, I just had to learn to see beyond the shadows.

Nofap for me has been about self-control, about trying, little by little, to fix my life, about stop lying to myself. I'm in college, my grades aren't perfect but at least I'm not failing ever single class I'm enrolled in, I'm still the socially awkward guy I ever was but at least I don't have a panic attack every time someone speaks to me, I still feel pretty lonely but I finally realized fapping won't make any of those problems go away.

I accept who I am, I'm not afraid of my demons anymore. More than anything, I think Nofap is about acceptance.

Well, that's about it. I know it's not the most inspirational post you ever read here, nor the most exciting story, but I just felt the need to share a little of my experience so far. Feel free to ask me any questions, I'll gladly answer them :)

Keep strong!

by kurocat