Age 28 - (Gay) Sex is completely different - Sooo much better!

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gay coupleReading the success stories has been the most motivating part of NoFap for me, so I just wanted to share my own. 35 days porn-free (28 no m/o) and I just had my first orgasm with another person! :D I completely credit noFap/porn-free/YBOP with this success.

The first few weeks for me were all about breaking my old habits and associations that sexual gratification comes from a computer - it was really a roller coaster, but things seemed to stabilize for me 2.5 - 3 weeks in. I've also been working out, cold showers, intermittent fasting, stopped drinking, and I've been socializing as much as possible to speed my recovery and rewire to healthier habits all around. The one thing missing was physical contact...

I've been online dating for about a year and a half with no real luck, but I stopped when I started NoFap to avoid the trigger (especially, being gay, even the cleaner sites have a lot of shirtless pics - a little "too close for comfort"). Anyway, three weeks in I decided to go back on Plenty of Fish (imo the most legit site for anyone looking for more than a hookup, gay/straight or bi - I know a lot of people who have had success with it), with a strict rule that I would avoid any trigger photos, and my goal was to have a conversation or especially meet up with someone...basically looking for a "cuddle buddy".

Long story short, I did meet someone, we hit it off great and went back to his place. We fooled around and I was really just focused on enjoying the experience rather than getting off. My ED was also greatly improved (maybe 50% or so) It was so much more enjoyable and relaxing than my past encounters where I was obsessed with getting off, unable to even get hard, feeling like I didn't belong in my body, desperately retreating to porn fantasy, STILL FAILING to get hard, binging to porn afterwards, and feeling like crap for a long time...

This time I felt like I was really THERE and responding without having to think about it and just enjoying the experience. I didn't orgasm that night but I was completely happy with the experience. Then when we hung out again a few days later, we fooled around for hours (ED more improved in just a few days), fell asleep together, and when we woke up, continued messing around and both came in a few minutes. It was the first time I have EVER had an orgasm with another person, and from something other than my own hand! Goal achieved.

But the best part was really everything else - waking up in someones arms, being intimate without the desperate craving to orgasm, cuddling, kissing, the CONFIDENCE to just be myself and relax with another person. In the end the orgasm was easy because I didn't focus on it.

So NoFap, THANK YOU! Thank you for helping me reach this milestone (So much sooner than I expected!), but more than that, thank you for opening my eyes to a whole new perspective on sex. I have a third "date" with the same guy coming up, and I'm just focused on enjoying it, and building our relationship, wherever it goes.

I realize I'm still only a short ways into this journey, but I'm revising my goals from here on out:

1) Continue to heal ED

2) Focus on sex as a "full-body" experience with another person WITHOUT the need to orgasm (Check out Karezza on YBOP)

3) Continue dis-associating sex from images (this is the addiction part that seems like it will get weaker but never really go away. However, the more I resist, the stronger I get!)

4) Get used to having so much more energy than when I was fapping all the time, and all the amazing things I can do with it!

5) Continue improving myself in every way (NoFap has lead to so many other benefits, but that's for another post...)

Sorry this was so long, but if your like me, the longer posts are almost always worth reading. Keep at it if you are struggling! If you are on the verge of relapse, read another success story or get away from the screen RIGHT NOW and go do something! (as many push ups as you possible can!!!).

And if you have your own success story please post it! They are SOOOO important!

LINK - Thank you NoFap! Sex is completely different (Sooo much better!) on the other side...

by iheliotrope


 

UPDATE - 90 Days

90 days pornfree and I feel amazing!

I have more energy, am happier more of the time, and and am thinking more clearly than I have in a long time.

And I'm in the best relationship I've ever been in :)

Take it from me and all the others - this works!

Keep going! :)