Age 31 - ED Cured. I met a nice girl we are in a serious relationship

Printer-friendly version

couple staring at each otherNo shit! Well, this is probably my last post in this forum. I have been a member since dez 2013 and now I can say with confidence that ED is not a problem anymore.

You can find my posts here:

http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=17992.msg348310#msg348310 http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=19616.msg345824#msg345824

I want to share my story here as a way to pay back to the community. When I first started, I read most of the posts in the "success stories" as a way to motivate myself during the hard times (aka urges).

First, I want to start saying that there is no bullshit on what we are discussing here and that the method does work! If you are having long term erection problems and you are a healthy young (<50) guy and watch porn and masturbate on a regular basis (1-2 week), then there is a good chance you have ED related to desensitization of your brain.

The situation:

Ok. Same old story: lots of masturbation to internet porn over the last 10-15 years and frequent ED issues with real flesh girls. For a guy, not being able to perform as well as you wish can really put you down. This had a big cost on my quality of life and I wish I could go back in time so that I could enjoy better my twenties. I could still get an erection and perform, but I would either ejaculate fast or lose my erection while doing certain positions.

The worst of it was that I felt that masturbating was a masculine thing. If I failed to have a proper erection with a real girl, the next day I would binge on porn in order to show to myself that I was a normal guy, with no ED issue whatsoever. My reasoning for the ED was that I was not finding the right girls. My wishful thinking was that once I was with a girl I really liked, I should have no problems in getting an erection.

Well, I did find that girl eventually and yes, there were ED problems. We could still have sex, but it was a bit forced and I had trouble keeping it up if not in certain positions. The relationship did not work out and while she didn’t say it, I know that the sex played a big issue in her decision of stopping seeing me. I was really frustrated at the time and I could not understand how a healthy guy like myself could easily get an erection with a picture or video but not with a real girl that felt right to me.

Eventually I decide to seek help. Before going to the doctor I googled for it and found the website we all know about. I instantly realized that the porn induced ED was a real issue to me.

My plan:

The first thing I did was to cut off porn. To be clear, I don't mean decreasing it but really cut it off. No more porn sites and not more masturbating to pictures or videos whatsoever.

This is when I realized that porn is really addictive. Some time ago I quit smoking and the urges in both cases felt the same!

Be aware that your brain will play tricks on you. As an example, once late at night I convinced myself that soft porn on the TV is not "really" porn and ended up relapsing and masturbating to it. Clearly a mistake that set me back some weeks of holding off porn. In another day I had good news at work and again my brain argued that I “deserved” a nice PMO session after work. Only this is time it did not tricked me.

At first I did not stop masturbating 2-3 time a week, only cut off porn. I did that because doing the hard mode at that time was impossible. I felt that I would never be able to instantly stop masturbating all together.

After 2-3 weeks the changes were clear. Masturbating to my imagination only was much easier, the erections were stronger and I could last longer doing it. Normal girl suddenly felt very attractive and I was much more driven toward them. At this time I started to go on a lot more dates than I used to.

Within 2-3 months of no porn I felt better at the process since I was seeing the positive changes so I decided to slow down masturbation. I kept a log where I decreased my masturbation frequency from 2-3 times a week to 1-2.

Once I had more confidence, I started doing 1 time per week and eventually 0.5 (1 time each 2 weeks). This is when things really started to show progress. I always did sports on a regular basis. But, with the extra energy I could easily push my boundaries. I started to swim and run every day. Sometimes I even did both, swimming in the morning and running in the afternoon after work. And man, it felt good! In 1-2 months I started to develop a fit body and with that came the benefits. I started to meet a lot more women. In the streets girls would look at me with interest. In bars and clubs it was much easier to meet girls.

Then I decided to go for the hard mode. I was difficult and I relapsed once or twice to MO (no porn). My record was around 45 days with no masturbation but I had a lot of sex in between.

The present situation:

Right now, I can say with confidence that I have no more ED problem. I met a nice girl last couple of months and we are in a serious relationship.

Having an erection is much easier now. It just happens naturally, like a kiss or a hug. Sometimes, just looking at her gets me going. The sex is better more sensorial (smells, sounds) than before. I can also last for much longer than I used to. And, it feels so good when I just lay there after sex and I see that look of satisfaction in her face. This is so good to since I had a  long road before I reached this place.

Yes, I still masturbate now and then. My gf lives in a different city and I don’t see her every weekend. I think it should be masturbating around 0.75 times per week (once every 10 days), just to keep the pipes clean.

Porn? Never again..

My advice for anyone starting the process are:

  • Don't try to be a hero. Start the process with small changes. First cut off porn and once you feel ready, go for the hard mode and cut off masturbation
  • You can relapse. Don't be too sad in relapsing. Yes, it will slow the process but it is not an overall defeat. From what I have read, most of the guys that overcame ED eventually relapsed
  • Don't rush it. This is not a sprint race but a marathon. You have to realize that what’s important is to keep your commitment to the process. It can take 1-2 weeks to notice improvements and 6-8 months before you fell that ED is not a problem.
  • Keep your mind busy. Find a sport or hobby that works for you and invest time in it. This is the best thing to fight the urges, which are likely to show when you are bored and alone.
  • Be humble about it and take this experience with your life. If you have experienced having ED problems you know how hard it is. If you are cured, be aware that it can easily come back if you start to PMO again.
  • Enjoy life, sex and respect women. Don’t be a douche about it. Be nice with girls, they can be one of the best things that happen to a man. If you find one that you love, work hard to keep her at your side
  • Communicate with your friends. If you think your friend might be having the same issue, tell him about this forum and make your point about the destructive side of porn. He will thank you latter in his life.

I hope you guys find it instructive. If you have any questions, please let me know.

Best,

A. G.

POST - Last post (a success story) - Thanks guys

By AltGr