Age 34 - ED, performance anxiety & premature ejaculation. (Amazing update - 4 years after this first rebooting story)
I am 34, single. I been using PMO for 20 years multiple times a day I was shy approaching women. Lost virginity at 27 with prostitute. Before my libido was so high, I could be aroused with just looking at woman. Now, it is so low I get aroused only on porn.
I stopped porn when I saw that I go for more harder and harder stuff. When I masturbate I am erect, but when I am with a women I get anxiety and ED, all I think of is - "Will it go up?" And it doesn't go up. I can't get those thoughts out of my head.
Now I am 1 month without PMO and I am determined to go as much as it takes to reach objective. Before one week I had sex with girl. It did not go up. I had to masturbate to get it somehow up, and I succeeded. Yesterday I tried with the same girl, no response. I masturbated, it did not go up, but when I touched her vagina I came instantly. I did it two times.
So now I suffer from ED, Performance anxiety and premature ejaculation. I get morning wood, mentally and physically I am OK, but something is wrong with me. Did I damage myself with the overuse of PMO so that I am now freak of nature, a man that can not do what man is supposed to do?
Will rebooting help, is there any help or hope please? Like Be the first of your friends to like this.
Well, it has happened a lot. It has been almost three month since my last blog entry. First I have to say to Marnia,and all other members: Thanx, your support means a lot to me, and second: REBOOT WORKS GUYS!
All you need is loving partner, trust and patience. My gf and I stopped PMO addiction together, quit phone sex,and started having, good and passionate sex. The result? The baby is on it's way, and we're getting married in two month.
Problems? Well,guys reboot is ongoing process and it takes time to gain confidence. A week ago I went on the porn site and I started thinking: "What is this crap, it is not a true sex,what do I needed this for anyway?" And I went of the site, and installed porn blocker (MetaCert), because man is weak and needs help to avoid a "just one peek "situation, to win an addiction.
I remember one day, a whole day of sex, I think I orgasmed 13 times. Sometimes, thoughts like: "Will it get up?" emerge the surface, but they vaporize in the passionate sex. Few days ago, I had wonderful sex in the morning and in the night I couldn't get it up. Perhaps I was exhausted from multiple sex every day, perhaps my head is full of wedding preparations pressure, perhaps I felt that sex was something I have to do, a task that I have to perform, which I did not.
Sex is about relaxation and enjoyment, not a task and reboot is a process that takes time and it has it's ups and downs, but the main thing is: REBOOT WORKS.
UPDATE (almost 4 years later) - A STORY OF SUCCESS!!!
Long time no see people!
I just want to tell my story as an example and support to all of you who were or are in the same situation like I was. I have been through a lot ,and all of it has been my weakness, my inability to say no!
You can all read my posts and see what and where I was. By the help of Marnia,Gary and the members on this forum Emerson and rest of the guys, slowly I got out.
I had my relapses, yes I was saying:"It is over" and then I went back in the spiral of PMO. Now I reject porn and masturbation with such ease that I can't believe I was so weak once.
The only orgasm I have are those with my wife. Porn and masturbation are totally out of the question.
The biggest danger is that little moment when you have to be strong, the moment when You say:"OK .I`ll just take a peek, or I`ll just want to touch my "hero" a bit, and off you go way back.
Trust me people, I used to look vintage nude photos and lie to myself it is not porn, it is black and white art photo, but in a couple days after I was watching Jenna Jameson ...
Same like any other addiction it starts with small steps, but they all lead down the hole.
Now I know what is like to be normal, small things arouse me, my wife`s hair, kisses, skin, smell, I love her and we enjoy sex very much.
Few times I caught myself fantasizing about other women, colleagues from work who were flirting with me, and I say to myself: ˇ"stop ,you do not need this, you have loving wife, crazy sex life, you do not have to prove to yourself nothing, go to your wife and love her, hug her, make love to her.
Horniness is a side effect of PMO abstain, but that is good, that is a sign that you are healthy, you just have to keep your horniness as a sign your body is telling you, I am healthy, I need my partner.
Now I am a father of two, boy 3 yrs old and a girl 1 year old. I love my family, I love my wife ,I love sex, I love life.
REBOOT WORKS, DO NOT QUIT!!!