Age 39 - (ED) married, Karezza
I made it! 90 days reboot from PMO. Background: 39 y/o, married with PIED that started getting bad after I switched to Tube sites. Read my original introduction post
I won't lie and say I never masturbated, but it wasn't anything like typical masturbation. It was more the light massage that is referred to here. I'd almost call it admirabation. More like a sensual celebration of having a good solid erection again with kegel squeezing, slow rubbing, with no orgasm or even an attempt to get close to orgasm. I started that around day 75. Basically exactly what http://yourbrainonporn.com recommends for rewiring.
Things I've learned
Couldn't have gotten this far without her knowing. Grateful for my wife. She has been supportive, never judgmental.
Luckily, I timed my reboot just right. We were at a all-time peak, ready to go even higher. Sex life was great, but it was starting to suffer because of my PIED from PMO. After making it through the flatlines, we're getting back on track, and I'm able to get a good erection.
I told my wife that once I started NoFap, my mood (on scale of 1-10 with 10 best) went from averaging 5 or 6 to about 7 or 8.
While practicing semen retention, I'm much closer to a 9 out of 10 mood-wise.
Having gone back to sex with orgasm after my flatline, I decided to go back to Karezza, and I've discovered that Karezza is responsible for at least +1 in my mood.
Avoiding Orgasms During Reboot
If you have PIED, http://yourbrainonporn.com recommends limiting orgasms.
I never thought I would be into having sex and not having an orgasm, but I tried it and loved it. I learned to go into sex with the mindset that I'm going to have sex and keep going until I am satisfied and then stop. After about 10 days of that, I start feeling amazing.
/r/karezza describes a motionless sex with a meditative state. I don't do that. I don't meditate, focus my energy, or any of that. I just have slow sex for about 30-40 minutes, and I back off and slow down if I get too close to orgasm.
Give a try for 3 weeks and then decide for yourself. What do you have to lose?
- My confidence level got a boost
- Self-image boost
- I noticed that I am more vocal and friendly
- More assertive
So far, much better. Here in the last few days, it's really been a strong erection again.
Before, I was having a semi-erection. Good enough for sex most of the time, but sometimes a dead-dick. And I would get an 75% erection during foreplay and lose it by the time I was able to penetrate. If my wife wasn't wet enough at the vaginal opening and I had to do the slow in and out to slowly get inside: forget it. I would have nothing.
Just this week, that exact situation came up and I was able to penetrate just fine. I didn't have to worry that I'd lose my erection before I was inside.
I use to love having sex in the jockey position, but I realized recently why I hadn't asked for it in a long time: it doesn't work with a semi. You need a fully-erect penis. And I've got it back.
I noticed distinct phases:
- Hyper-sexual (withdrawal) - Day 0-37
- This was an easy stage thanks for my wife and karezza, and physical bonding, was actually fun
- Flatline - Day 38-53
- Dead dick at times
- Weak erections at others
- I started having orgasms again at this point with the wife, which led right back to a flatline
- Sleepy Libido (4 or so days)
- Orgasm again
- Mild flatline (about 5 days)
- Not sure what I'd call it. I may or may not end up in a flatline, but being back on no orgasm mode is helping erections, mood. I'm back to feeling awesome
- Sleepy libido
- Mild flatline (another 5 or so days)
At this point, I'm feeling rebooted, but this is my new lifestyle. No more porn. On to 180 days!