Age 40+ - 90 days for the third time: The defeat of ED
So my counter ticked over 90. I would like to do a full report, but don't have the time right now. So I'll just record some observations top of head. This is my 3rd successful streak to 90. I got to approx 100 days the first two times.
Between the last streak and this I had a big relapse. Almost back to the old ways for about 2 months. (Which was prolonged edging. Not very frequent, like twice a week. but it still dominated my life ). Looking back on that relapse now, it was a weird time. Who was that relapse guy? I really can't understand why I let that happen, or who was that animal. Because it all seems such wierd behaviour now. Anyone else have that feeling? But I needed it for a final reminder about why I am doing this.
This time it feels different. I have no inclination/curiosity to fap, which I did at this point before. And I'm not interested in going back to a regular "healthy fap" schedule. I'm really done, and I can see how when I said that in the past, I didn't really mean it, and my actions showed that.
But right now, I have not felt more confident/stable as I am now, in about a decade. ( almost literally to the month, bizarrely ). I have recently had some of the happiest free-est moments of my life, which a couple years ago I thought were behind me.
This is not about getting with a woman, although I have been single for a few years now, which I put down to the edging addiction - also a major cause of the demise of my LTR, but not the root cause. I understand that now. Having said that, there are now women who appear to be after me. Wanting to set stuff up- chasing me. This is a novel experience. I suspect this was happening in the past, but I never noticed it. It's great.
Favourite superpower? Connecting to other people, and being genuinely interested in doing so. Like a normal person. I previously didn't really want to connect. But now almost everyone is interesting, everyone is beautiful in some way.
All this is not just down to not fapping, I "did something else instead", but nofap was the key that opened the door that I chose to walk through. Hardest steps I ever took in my life. I started to work out what i wanted to do for the first time in my life and started to try doing it. I did have the dead embers from some past connections with people that I was able to kindle back into life, a little. Slowly I am rebuilding myself - and this is giving me a reason to never go back.
Anyway. I'm now properly at the start of a long journey that is the rest of my life, and it's going to be a great adventure!
by Throwfapthrow92 days
Hi guys, I'm really sorry not to write a longer post, but I've not been in here in ages, and I just checked in and saw I hit 150 days last week.
Basically I'm here to say that for this person, it totally and fully worked. All ED gone, (not a hint of PE either!) I'm off hard mode, and sex is better than it has ever been.
This is going to be a bit rambling and littered with nsfw which I have marked up as per nofap etiquette. If you want to ask me anything please do, but it might take me a while to respond, as I don't really do reddit anymore. But I will check back tomorrow.
Check my post history for my story. I'm in the older demographic, but was single for quite a while in the last few years, and definitely had a problem. Managed 2 long 100 day streaks before this one, which really feels like will now go on forever.
But I'm now on a different planet, and really there is truly no going back.
Really, the counter doesn't matter any more. I'm done. Fully rebooted. A couple of months ago I met a new woman and, in the last 6 weeks I've overcome all the things I was afraid of.
ED overcome, and have managed to come from straight sex, and also from a handjob - the latter of which I have never done in my life before. I'll admit I have not yet come from a blowjob, but that is more out of choice than because I can't.
It was difficult at first, and the first time we had sex, I did suffer a little ED. Thanks to nofap I could at least get it up, and maintain an erection, but I could not come, and she was a little worried as to what was going on, but we persevered, and over the next day and week it got better, now it's better than it has ever been.
This stuff works! I also told her about it, although I've not completely explained everything I used to do, I did explain that I decided not to fap again, and a little of the journey, and reasons why.
I would also like to say that I don't suffer the feared chaser effect, but I think that's really because I have had so many long streaks on hard mode that I am a little immune to it.
Also have found that I am not really suffering from having O'd. The "nofap confidence" is still here. I'm really only suffering from being tired. from staying up late with the lady, if you know what I mean.
Anyway, I just wanted to thank this community, because although my journey is not all about nofap, I could not have started to pull my way out of where I was without fixing this first.
Fapstronauts I salute you. I feel I have totally won this, with your help. I'd almost forgotten about fapping and PMO - it was only when I remembered about reddit that I thought to come here and post.
OK - hope that came out as useful data point rather than an extended brag. It was never about the sex for me. And the benefits of connecting with people are by far the most important for me. I just wanted to report on those in this post.
Stay strong brothers and sisters!
UPDATE - One year PMO free, over 40 male. AMA
Hi brothers and sisters.
So I did it- made over a year of nofap. I'm pretty sure that I'll never PMO again, and fairly likely that I won't masturbate.
I just thought I would check in to mark the occasion. Overall life seems sort of normal. PMO seems like a wierd way to spend your time.
Check my history for my journey. This was my third serious streak.
I did have a wierd dream a week ago which I woke from, when I realised I was dreaming I was about to fap. That was strange - first time that has happened to me for about 18 months. Maybe because I've not had sex for a month. I guess it shows I've still got something left to do!