Age 40 - Porn-induced ED & escorts: From misery to happiness

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I'm recovered. You can read what I went through with porn addiction and escort addiction in the link. Basically, I read some stuff on YBOP and tried to stop using immediately. I continued to use escorts. My errections came back. Then it was tough because I had all this positive energy and I knew I needed to find a girl.

Eventually I found a girl. It's only been a few weeks but it's going well. The sex is amazing and getting better. We were a week apart recently and it was tough and I was using porn during periods of separation and anxiety. This doesn't cause a relapse but there is ongoing awareness required of porn and how it is triggered by difficult feelings and emotional states and recognising the impact of porn on me and on my body. Very happy right now and so happy for this website and YBOP.

LINK - Recovered 40 year old - from misery to happiness

BY - Smash


 

INITIAL POST  (6 months earlier)- PIED and Escorts

I’m 39 I’ve been using internet porn and visiting high class escorts as a way to deal with frustration and disappointments in dating and relationships. In my 20s it was mainly escorts more than porn. I was earning enough money to pay for what I needed. Some would say I have an enviable lifestyle although it is more isolated than most would care for.

During my 30s the porn and escort use has increased and the real relationships have decreased. The internet porn use has increased a lot in recent years to the extent where it has become excessive.

I’m not sure if its the increased use of porn that has affected my ability and desire to create and sustain relationships or if it is my inability to create and sustain relationships that has caused my increased addiction to porn. Maybe its both.

At my age, and with my disappointing relationship history, I now consider escorts as my only reliable source of sex with a sufficiently attractive young woman. I have tried to control my use of escorts because I am mindful of how much I can afford to spend. Very good looking escorts are expensive.

The sexual act has never been a problem before. It’s always been very natural with a girlfriend, one night stand or with an escort. My last girlfriend was two years ago and my performance was fine while I was interested. Many of my earlier experiences with escorts have been awesome.

My internet porn use increased a lot in the last 6 - 8 years. The first thing I noticed was that it took me a long time to climax when I was with a girl/escort. I didn’t consider this a problem. Seven months ago I was with a very attractive escort but my erection went soft during penetration. I still managed to complete the act but the whole experience was not as enjoyable because I kept going soft. I experienced a loss of erection or inability to orgasm a few more times and I became concerned. When penetration and blow jobs didn't work, I often had to use my hand with a firm grip to climax, it was the only way.

I thought it was something to do with the use of condoms or perhaps a loss of sensitivity caused by excessive masturbation, or maybe my age. I did not consider that viewing porn could be a contributing factor. I was with an exceptionally attractive escort two days ago and I was going soft! Again, I managed to complete the act but it was very annoying.

I can get hard and orgasm several times using porn, but I have trouble staying hard with a real woman (escort) for one round of foreplay and sex. My erections are not as hard or satisfying as they used to be but I can sometimes masturbate and orgasm to porn several times even if my dick isn't fully hard which is another problem associated with porn addiction and porn induced erectile dysfunction.

I considered porn as something to use when I didn't have the time or money to meet escorts. Now I cannot enjoy my sexual experiences with escorts like I used to. I have stopped using porn since I found out about PIED yesterday. I have an arrangement to another escort in a few days. I will see how this goes. I am considering trying Karezza Sex with her perhaps as a way to rewire. Really I just want to get hard and enjoy my experiences with escorts. And, I don't want to assume that any girl in real life won't be able to get me hard.

If I quit porn will I get back to how I was in my 20s or are the escorts also part of the porn addiction? I'm happy to stop porn 100%. I can even arrange meetings with escorts without viewing the websites if I build trust with the high end agencies to understand my likes and dislikes and meet my requirements. But if I stopped porn and escorts then I would end up celibate, which is not my aim.