Age 42 - 5 weeks: lots of positive changes
(Thirty-something) I didn't write a 30 day report but some changes that are keeping me on the straight and narrow:
- Confidence and calmness grows every day. It's not fearlessness but a lack of anxiety. People respond to it. I feel less compromised and more myself than ever.
- Time for others and insight into what makes them tick. I've always loved being with people but fap and porn often put up a barrier in understanding, made me impatient or unkind - total turnaround.
- Determination and productivity. Things are getting done that have taken me ages to tackle (years in some cases).
- Better appearance and physically stronger. Many comments on how good I look (especially my skin). Lost weight and take diet and exercise seriously.
- Emotions returning to life. This can be painful and sometimes they are out of proportion but I feel alive. Someone on this subreddit wrote success is partly about living with discomfort - I'm beginning understand that. The alternative is to deaden an emotion (or never to realise you even have an emotion) with a five hour wankfest?
- Feel better about myself and my life. My mum said yesterday that she thought I seemed happier than I had in a long time. I normally tell her most things but this one will remain my little secret.
- Enjoy feeling horny. If I see / meet someone I like I don't immediately feel desperate, inadequate and sad. I enjoy them and, if the situation allows, enjoy flirting with them in a relaxed, inventive way. People like that and respond. Even walking down the street is an erotic adventure at the moment.
Overall I am sold on NoFap. Sometimes I have bad days but it is one step back, two steps forward. Why stop?
PSI never kept records :o) but I'd say PMO was nearly every day edging for at least 1 - 2 hours, and every few weeks I'd binge for up to 7 hours.
I used porn for the first time in my mid 20s and my PMO career took off properly when broadband came to town. I was mid 30s when i first realised I was hooked and first tried to stop. Not thought of this before, but i may have been fapping addictively before the porn.