Female - Nofap has taught me patience, happiness, understanding, satisfaction, effort, sociality and concentration, and that my body and mind are one

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265 official days behind me and 100 far from a year of no pmo. Healthy streak. Why would I be quitting? When I first started this I had no other goals to stay clean for a very long time, probably forever until I'd get a partner. Porn was shit and masturbating worthless, draining and life-worsening.

I wouldn't care to take a step forward. Life was dull, that all, so on.

At start I replaced useless times with reading instead which improved my versatility.

After 2 months of nofap I started training which has lasted persistently to this day.

After 3 I started a new hobby.

After 4 I got my childhood gift for Christmas, the reason being my persistence for such a thing. I wouldn’t had that exact type of spunk if not been NoFap. Finally got it, drowning myself in it every week to today.

At probably 5 or 6 months I overcame my anxieties five times better than before, and it was rewarding, soul feeding, cleansing and achieving. My mood became better after that. Got a bit more confidence and I was finally happier.

At the boring times from those days on I wrote; it's a thing I'll forever love. The trigger to that had probably also been the fact that I was in better shape then. And then, one thing I remember with tears, accidentally I hit my toe to a drawer and it cracked back into place after a really long time. But as the months went on I had more and more confidence and I started to be more outgoing, and my music taste expanded to understand something as sensual as classical music and enjoy it.

Of course there were boulders, but I can't look back into smashed obstacles no more. I just don't see them.

Nofap has taught me patience, happiness, understanding, satisfaction, effort, sociality and concentration, and that my body and mind are one and that I truly can do anything if I want it. And oh, do I.

[To demonstrate the last one: my crush (actually I've been in such emotional hormones throughout last month’s I find her very much more) literally writhed against me today (and that's why I'm quitting, keep reading). Would it make a rookie insane? What if she'd get her thigh on the entirety of your arm? Her hind in front of you? For long enough time? My cheekbones just stung painful as hell and more. But I just thought: It's all going to be ok. (Counting out the times I thought about not going to the bathroom) That's something you can't learn from a book.]

Back to the question: Why quit nofap?

I feel like the time has come when I'll look at what'll I want to do with my life from this point on, how will I be handling sexuality, because I trust myself and my mental capacity on a level that'll challenge myself, and I sort of want that in my life. Like an intelligent person needs to think, and an athlete needs excercise, so will a spunky person need something to have their spunk towards. I want to feel myself free but now tame in the modern world.

I hope I never go back.

As a failured mood raiser for this dramatic post: Although I'd relapse after my goal of 365 days, I'd still be an astronaut: I'd get shot into space.

Cheers, community, and keep pushing!

As a P.S, I'm a female and I understand men's struggles. If you feel embarrassed about what might happen just think about how women reveal themselves so openly and you (probably) look. You'll force yourself through the process.

LINK - My first and last post