Pāʻoihana Pākahi: Ua makemakeʻoe iā ia (2011)

ʻO ka pilina paʻaʻana he papahana olaʻole kahi hana kūlohelohe

Ma nāʻano likeʻole o nāʻano likeʻole o ka nohona likeʻole, ke aloha nei nā kānaka i nā wahi a pau, pili pono i ka lōʻihi o ka wā, a me ka hoʻopunipuniʻana i ka wā e hana hewa ai nā kāne. ʻO kēia nā hana i lokoʻole,ʻaʻole nā ​​hua o nā hanana ahupuaʻa. E kuhikuhi i kēia wahi i kekahi ala'ē aʻe: Ka nui o nā mea maʻi hana ole Hōʻailona ka inoa o kā lākou hoa kāne ma kā lākou pēpē, a aole malalo o ke ano o ka huhu huhu.

Hoʻokumuʻia nā Haumāna kanaka e hāʻule i ke aloha, kahi pou ma mua, ua wehewehe i nā ʻano pilina paʻa i loaʻa nā ʻano neurobiological ma hope o lākou. I kēia manawa, nui nā ʻike noiʻi o kā mākou papahana paʻa paʻa paʻa. Hiki ke wānana ʻia, laina ia me nā hōʻike e puka mai ana mai kahi vair prairie vole kaulana. (Nā mea hou aku i kēlā manawa.) Nūpepa nūhou o New York Times Hōʻikeʻo John Tierney i ka noiʻi hou penei:

Ua hoʻomaʻamaʻa pono ʻia ka wahine 21 makahiki ʻaʻole e pīpī me kekahi mea i hele mai i loko o ke keʻena hoʻokolohua i loko o kekahi mau mahina. Ua nānā ʻo ia i ka maka a me ke kamaʻilio ʻana i kahi liʻiliʻi. ʻAʻole ʻo ia i hoʻohana i nā mea hoʻonaninani a me nā mea ʻala, mālama i kona lauoho i loko o ka ponytail maʻalahi, a komo mau i nā jeans a me kahi T-shirt maʻalahi. …

Ke noi mua ua hōʻike ʻo ia i kahi wahine ma ke kūlana momona o kāna pōʻai menstrual me he mea lā ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi, a ua ʻike ʻia kēlā hopena like ma aneʻi - akā i ka manawa i helu ʻia ai kēia wahine e kahi kāne i pili ʻole me kekahi mea ʻē aʻe.

ʻO nā keiki'ē aʻe, nā mea i pili i ka pili aloha, uaʻikeʻiaʻo ia ma keʻano koʻikoʻi emi he uʻi ke hele ʻo ia i ka pae kiʻekiʻe o ka momona, no ka mea ma kekahi pae ua ʻike lākou a laila ʻo ia ka mea hoʻoweliweli nui loa i kā lākou pili lōʻihi. I mea e hoʻowalewale hewa ʻia ai, ua ʻōlelo lākou iā lākou iho ʻaʻole ʻo ia ka wela. …

Hoʻohui houʻo Tierney i kēlāʻano,

ʻO ke kohoʻana i ka poʻe i noho lōʻihi i ka manawa e hānai ai i nā keiki:ʻo nā kāne a me nā wāhine e hiki ke mālama i ka pilina ma ka mālamaʻana i kā lākou mau hoa. Ua loaʻa iā lākou ka pono o ka pono e hoʻomau i kaʻoiaʻiʻo, aiʻole ia ma ka makemakeʻole e hele me kaʻoiaʻiʻo i ka hoʻopunipuniʻana i ke akamai.

Ua haʻi pū kekahi ʻo ia i ka psychologist UCLA ʻo Martie Haselton: “Hoʻopilikia ʻia nā wahine a me nā kāne e ka hoʻoipoipo ʻana, akā ʻaʻohe manaʻo o [nā kānaka] ʻo ia ke kumu o kēia mau hoʻololi nui i kā mākou hana. [Ke ʻano o ka noiʻi ʻana] ua maopopo he mea like mākou me nā māmela ʻē aʻe ma mua o kā mākou i manaʻo ai. ”

Pehea kaʻoiaʻiʻo. Ma ka'ōlelo, ua wehe mua nā meaʻepekema i ke kumu nā'eneke'ānana e hoʻoponopono ai i ka hoʻopaʻaʻana i nā pālua nā ʻano, a lawa pono, ʻo kekahi o lākou kahi ʻano hana e hoʻoulu ai i ka huhū pale kāne kāne i nā wahine makemake ʻole (ke hana ʻo ia i kahi paʻa paʻa me kāna kaomi nui). ʻAʻole kū kēia hana no nā kumu moʻomeheu. Kūleʻa ia ma muli o ka piʻi ʻana o ka vasopressin neurochemical i kahi ʻāpana nui o kona lolo. (Ma ke ala, ʻaʻole ia e mālama iā Mr. Vole 100% ʻoiaʻiʻo. ʻO Mrs. Vole kekahi, ua ʻike ʻia he fling kāna.)

ʻImi e pili ana i nā mīkini e kuhikuhi ana inā hiki i ka mammal ke hoʻopaʻa paʻa? Hoʻohuli i loko o nā voles monogamous i koho maoli ʻia i ka mahele o ka oxytocin a me nā mea loaʻa vasopressin i ka ʻōnaehana limbic o ka lolo. ʻOiai e loaʻa i nā vole āpau ka uku ʻana i ka wahine, loaʻa nā manaʻo maikaʻi i nā vole monogamous mai kahi hoa. ʻO ke ʻano paʻa, ma ke ala, ʻo ia ke kumu keʻano hoʻolālā (ʻo kēlā me kēia mau mea hōʻalo'ē aʻe). ʻO kēia ke kumu e hiki ai i ke kuhi hoʻopilikia i nā mea kaulike.

ʻOiaʻiʻo, inā hoʻonāukiuki ka poʻe ʻepekema i ka hana ʻana o ka nui loa o ka dopamine me ka hoʻonāukiuki kūlohelohe, ʻaʻole paʻa wale kahi holoholona, ​​akā lilo pū kekahi me ka huhū i nā wāhine a pau. Hiki iā ia ke kōkua e hoʻomaopopo i ke kumu o kahi mau mea hoʻokani porn e lilo ana ka makemake i nā wāhine maoli?

ʻO ke kumu koʻikoʻi ka mea e kū mai ka piʻina hoʻopaʻa paʻa ʻelua mai nā hanana hanana, ʻaʻole wale ka nohona kaiapili. Ua ulu ia mai ka mīkini mālama pēpē, a paʻa mau nā ʻano ʻelua i ka circuitry uku o ka lolo. No laila, ʻoiai he nui nā poʻe komohana e ʻike ʻia i loko o kahi moʻomeheu hook-up chaotic no kēia manawa, ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo he kanaka mākou, ma ke ʻano maoli, me he promiscuous e like me nā bonobo chimps a i ʻole nā ​​manaʻo hoʻopaʻa paʻa ʻelua he kūkulu moʻomeheu superficial. .

E hoʻomanaʻo i keʻano o ka loiloi kanaka a me ka bonobo i ka makahikiʻeono miliona makahiki i hala. Loaʻa ko mākou mau pili pili makou lala o ka lāʻau evolutionary, ʻoiai inā ʻaʻole lākou i puni. Ma kahi o kēlā lālā lālā i lilo ai nā kāne i mau mea paʻa ma muli o ka loli o ka lolo.

ʻOiaiʻo ka paʻaʻana o nā mea mammalian he meaʻole,ʻo ka hoʻololiʻana i ka hoʻohuiʻana i nā mea likeʻole e like me ka meaʻole. Eia kekahi laʻana,ʻano like me kā lākou mau hoahānau pilikino me keʻano pilikino e hiki ai i nā meaʻepekema ke hoʻololi i kahi kīʻale e hoʻokuʻu i nā mea paiʻole ma o ka wikiwikiʻana i ka'ōlelo hoʻokahi pahu ma kona mua mua. (Hoʻonuiʻia nā lohe o ka vasopressin). I ka pōkole,ʻo ka hana a ko mākou mau kaikunāne bonobo mamao loa he pāʻaniʻoli, akā,ʻaʻole loa i ka piliʻole i kaʻikeʻana i nā kumuhana o ke kāne.

"Ah, akā e nānā pehea kāua!" ke noʻonoʻo nei ʻoe, ʻeā? E noʻonoʻo i nā manaʻo ʻē aʻe ʻelua e pili ana i kā mākou lawena hoʻokiki i kēia manawa:

ʻO ka mea mua,ʻo nā haʻawina a mākou e hana nei ma ke Komohana (ke hoʻohana nei i nā haumāna o ke kulanui) me keʻano pilikino i kaʻikeʻana i nā hana a pau o ke kanaka ma luna o nā'āpana liʻiliʻi o kā mākou. ahupuaʻaʻole. ʻOiaiʻo ka nui o nā kāne maleʻole ma keʻano maʻamau o nā kānaka,ʻo ka nui o nā wāhine e ola mau nei. (ʻO nā lāhui he nui i hiki ke hāʻawi i kahi wahine'ē aʻe, akā heʻuʻuku hiki hāʻawi iā ia.)

I ka pōkole, ināʻoe e kuʻi ana me nā hoa he nui no ka hoʻolimalima oe hiki i kahi outlier. ʻAʻole kū maʻamau kāu ʻano kanaka - kahi kihi e nānā maʻalahi ʻia e nā kānaka noiʻi Komohana. ʻO kahi laʻana, kahi noi 2007 o 1,500 kāne lae pua kāne a me nā wahine i koi mai e haʻi iā mākou.No ke aha i mau ai ke kāne i ka wahine. ” Ua ʻike he nui nā haumāna i moekolohe no ka leʻaleʻa, ʻaʻole hānau. (Maoli ??) Ma nā moʻomeheu ʻē aʻe, paʻa pinepine ke kanaka i ka pili mua o ka wahine kope a kūkulu hale. ʻOiai ʻo ka moekolohe me nā hoa he nui paha e loaʻa nā pēpē ikaika ("mālama i ka seminal") Me kāna pahuhopu. (Lele paha ka poʻe heluhelu i nā hopena kuhihewa, he kolohe wau no ka leʻaleʻa, akā he pā wau no ka nā pono o ka hoʻomalu.)

ʻO ka lua, ʻo ka huaʻōlelo "pālua bonder" ʻaʻole ia e hoʻohālikelike i ka wahine moekolohe piha. ʻO ka manaʻo wale ia e hoʻopili i nā kāne a hānai i nā keiki (ʻike ʻia ka pilina pili kaiaulu). ʻAʻohe mea hoʻohālike i nā mea mammal e pili wale i ka wahine; he hana loiloi ka mea likeʻole. No laila,ʻo kaʻoiaʻiʻo,ʻaʻole hiki i nā kānaka a pau he hoʻokahi haneli haneli mau mea pono no ke ola aʻo kekahi o mākou e moe kolohe me ka pilinaʻole he mea hōʻoia. Ka nui no hoi lawelawe i ka hanana.

Eia nō naʻe he mea pono e hoʻomanaʻo i kēlā me kēia-lolo lolo, me kāu, i hoʻonohonoho mau ʻia e hoʻopili i kāu kāne. No laila, ʻoiai inā kolohe nui kāu milieu no kēia manawa, ʻaʻohe āu mea e kala aku ai inā ʻike ʻoe i ka ʻiʻini i kahi paʻa paʻa i waenakonu o kou moekolohe. Aia nā kumu i kou lolo, ʻaʻole kou hānai ʻana, a hiki iā ʻoe ke noʻonoʻo e kī i kēia pono kūpono.

I kā mākou moʻomeheu, nā makana a me ka wā ʻōpio, he mea ʻokoʻa paha ia e hauʻoli a ʻoluʻolu hoʻi kekahi mau kāne ʻelemakule e kekahi i ka hala ʻana o nā makahiki. … Inā ʻike ʻoe i ka piha lima o nā kāne makua, e noʻonoʻo e pili ana i ka poʻe i waena o lākou e ʻumeʻume nei kekahi i kekahi. ʻO ka nānā ʻana iā lākou he hōʻike lawa ia no ka mea ʻaʻole i hoʻokumu ʻia ka ʻumeume i ka uʻi. … ʻO ka ʻike ʻana, hoʻopā ʻana, a me ka hoʻolohe ʻana i ka hoa hoʻolaʻa i loaʻa ka nui a me ka nui o ka mana ma luna o ka manawa e hoʻomaka i ka hoʻokuʻu ʻia ʻana o ka [the bonding hormone, oxytocin] .— Mark Chamberlain PhD

ʻO nā mea likeʻole i loko o kahiʻano pilina e like me mākou.

E nānā “ʻO ka Hui i Manaʻoʻia he Pīpī:ʻO ka hoʻonaʻauao kūikawā ke hoʻonuiʻia i nāʻanoʻokoʻa o ke kāne?"

(Kope) Pākī Pālua

ʻO ka hoʻopaʻa paʻa ʻana (a i ʻole monogamy) kahi ʻōnaehana moʻo nui laha ʻole i waena o nā māmela, i loaʻa ma lalo o 5% o nā laha (Kleiman, 1977). Eia nō naʻe, ʻike ʻia he mea kikowaena i ka repertoire hānau kanaka. No laila he mea hoihoi ia i ko mākou ʻōnaehana moena nui e like me ka ʻōnaehana moena maʻamau o nā manu ma mua o ka hapanui o nā mammals, e like me ko mākou mau hoahānau kokoke loa, ʻo nā kika nui. I ka hana ʻana i kēia hoʻopiʻi, he mea nui e akāka e pili ana i nā mea ʻekolu. ʻO ka mea mua, ʻaʻole ka hoʻopiʻi ʻo ia nā paʻa paʻa e pono ai no ke ola. I ka loaʻa ʻole o ka monogamy o ke ola āpau, ʻo ka hapa nui o nā paʻa paʻa he mau mahina a mau makahiki paha akā e hoʻopau loa (Fisher, 1992). E hoʻomaopopo naʻe, ʻo ka hapa nui o nā paʻa paʻa e mau a hiki i ka hopena o ke ola, ʻoiai ma nā kaiāulu forager i nele i nā koʻikoʻi koʻikoʻi ma ka hemo ʻana (e nānā, e laʻa, Marlowe, 2004).

ʻO ka lua, ʻaʻole ka hoʻopiʻi he mau moe kolohe nā kāne ʻelua. Hōʻike ka hapa nui o nā ana ʻimi he ʻoi aku ka emi ma mua o 50% o nā kāne a i ʻole nā ​​wahine i ka pili pili lōʻihi lōʻihi loa (Blow & Hartnett, 2005). Eia nō naʻe, kekahi, a ma muli o ka hopena, ua aloha ʻia kekahi hapa o nā keiki e kahi mea ʻē aʻe ma mua o ka makuakāne kaiaulu (ʻo nā koho maikaʻi loa e waiho ana ma kahi o 1-3%; Anderson, 2006; Wolf, Musch, Enczmann, & Fischer, 2012). ʻO ke kolu, ʻaʻole ka hoʻopiʻi ka hoʻopaʻa paʻa ʻelua kā mākou ʻōnaehana moʻo maoli. Hōʻike nā kānaka i nā ʻōnaehana moena āpau i loaʻa i nā ʻano ʻē aʻe, e like me ka monogamy, polygyny (hoʻokahi kāne, ʻelua a ʻoi paha wahine), a me polyandry (hoʻokahi wahine, ʻelua a ʻoi paha kāne; Murdock, 1967).

ʻAʻole ia he mea maʻamau no nā poʻe e komo i ka hoʻopiliʻana o ka moe, aiʻole e komo i ka moe kolohe ma mua o ka mareʻana ma waena o ka pili lōʻihi. ʻO nā alapine likeʻole o kēia mauʻano maʻamau i loaʻa ma nāʻano likeʻole a me nā manawa o ka wā i hala. Eia naʻe, koe naʻe ka polyandry lōʻihi, he mea maʻalahi nā mea a pau, a pēlā nā mea a pau loa o ka papahana o nā holoholona a ke kanaka. No laila,ʻaʻole kā mākou koiʻana,ʻo ka paʻaʻana o nā pilinaʻo ia keʻano pilikino likeʻole o ke kanaka. ʻO kā mākou koiʻana,ʻo ia wale nō ka paʻa o ka pilina ma kahi maʻamau no ka moekolohe a me ke kāpiliʻana i loko o ko mākouʻano, he lōʻihi loa ia, a ua waiho kēia i kahi hohonu hohonu i ko mākou kino.