Loaʻa kūpono:
Ua kōkua nō hoʻi wau i nā kuhi he nui i hoʻoponopono ʻia i nā pilikia hana hana i ulu ʻia mai ka hele ʻana i ka wikiwiki, a me ka orgasm mai kahi wikiwiki wikiwiki, e waiho nei i ka mea hiki ʻole ke hoʻāla a hōʻea i ka orgasm i kā lāua moe kime.
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ʻO kekahi o kaʻu mau mea hoʻomanaʻo mua o ka noho ʻana i ka ʻauʻau i loko o kā mākou hale i ka makahiki 1960 i loko o ka hale ʻauʻau ʻo Stokes Valley; he kauhale kahili liʻiliʻi e noho manawaleʻa ana i nā puʻu ma waena o Upper Hutt a me Lower Hutt, ʻākau o Wellington. ʻO wau, ʻehā paha ma kahi o 4 a 5 paha i kekahi manawa, ʻo koʻu kaikuahine nui ma kekahi ʻaoʻao a ʻo ko mākou kaikaina i waenakonu. ʻ standinglelo mai ka mumū ma luna o mākou, me kāna pinani, e lūlū i kona manamana lima i koʻu kaikunāne, me ka ʻōlelo ʻana: "Inā ʻole ʻoe e hoʻomake i ka hana ʻana i kēlā mea a hāʻule ia mea, e hiolo ia!" Ua hiki koke mai ia mea iaʻu, IT 'O ka mea i hiki ke hana i kaʻu.
I kekahi mau makahiki ma hope mai ua loaʻa iaʻu kahi ʻano kupaianaha ʻēkika lele e lele ana ma luna o ka noho kaukau. Ke holo nei i ka lumi kīhāpai e hōʻike i kēia komo ʻana iā Mum, ua haʻi aku au ʻaʻole i ka naʻaupō a he ʻoiaʻiʻo, ke kū nei wau i lalo i ke alapule e nānā hou aku, ua nalo aku.
E hele i mua i kekahi mau makahiki ʻē aʻe a aia wau i waena, e nānā ana i ke kiʻi ʻoniʻoni e pili ana i ka hana hou ʻana me Mum i ka pō o nā kaikamahine, a ukali ʻia e kahi huakaʻi mālie lōʻihi i ka home. I hoʻokahi makahiki a ʻelua paha ma hope ua hala koʻu kaikuahine i kāna puke e pili ana i nā wā, i hana ʻia e Johnson & Johnson, nā mea hana i nā kāwele hoʻomaʻemaʻe. Ma ke ʻano he mea hoʻomohala lohi, loaʻa iaʻu kahi manawa e maʻa ai i kēlā manaʻo a no koʻu makemake nui ʻana i nā umauma e kupu. I ka papa ʻelima, ua loaʻa i kaʻu kumu aʻo biology i kāna wahine e aʻo iā mākou i ka haʻawina hoʻokahi e pili ana i ka hana hou ʻana, me ka hopohopo ʻole e pili ana i ka mea ana e hoʻohālikelike ai no mākou ma ka hemo ʻana.
Maʻā kekahi kāhāhā ʻana, ʻoiaʻiʻo, i ka wā i ʻike ai wau i ka kiʻi ʻana i nā kiʻi kikowaena ʻaʻohe oʻu ʻike e hana ai. Na Mum lāua ʻo Papa i kahi kalapu no ʻekolu mau makahiki mai ka wā o koʻu 14 makahiki, e hāʻawi ana iaʻu i ka hele mai i kēlā me kēia mahina ma hope o kēlā mahina Playboy a Penthouse. ^ E Ha yM. Ke kuhi nei akā i ka manawa like, hopohopo wau i nā ala a pau aʻu i HUA ʻole ai e like me nā kaikamāhine ma nā kiʻi a inā paha he kumu wau e hana like ai ʻole a ʻaʻole paha. Mum aole; ka mea wale nō i ʻaʻa ai iā ia e lipstick a ke nānā wau iā ia e wehe i ke kūlou luna kaua a ka ʻalāʻau i kū ai iā ia i ke kapa polū māmā a me ka hana, i ʻōlelo ʻia he tarty. Ua hoʻoholo wau e koho ma waena o ke kaikamahine maikaʻi a me ke kaikamahine kaikamahine? He kūlike a i ʻole paha ka mea nui aku, kahi i makemake ai nā keiki kāne?
He mea wānana ka manawa i ka wā o kaʻu hana mua i ka moekolohe he mauʻu, ʻike ʻole ʻia a maikaʻi ʻole ʻia. Ua ʻike ʻia i kā mākou poʻe keiki i kēia manawa ma 2020 ma mua o ka makahiki o mua? ʻO kekahi akā hopohopo wau ʻaʻole nui, no laila ʻaʻole wau i kahaha i ka ʻike o ka mea i hoʻopuka ʻia e ko mākou poʻo helu, ʻo David Shanks, o ka ʻimi hou ʻana o kāna keʻena i ka ʻōpio a me nā kiʻi paha. Ua hōʻike kēia haʻawina koʻikoʻi, ʻoiai e makemake ana kā mākou poʻe ʻōpio e hiki iā ia ke kamaʻilio pū i ka pākeke e pili ana i ka mea a lākou e ʻike nei i mea e kōkua ai i ka hoʻopōmaʻa ʻana, ʻo ka hapa nui e kamaʻilio me ko lākou mau mākua, ua hāʻawi ʻia i ka papa ʻaina a puni ke nānā ʻana i porn. ʻO ke kala a hilahila e hoʻokele i kā lākou nānā ʻana ma lalo o ke kula, no nā kaikamahine i kahi ʻoi aku ka nui o nā keiki. Ke hoʻomau nei ka dilemma: pehea e nani akā aloha.
Ua ʻike ʻia ka ʻimi noiʻi, no ka mea, ua maʻalahi loa ke kiʻi i nā kiʻi me nā keiki a me nā ʻōpio a me nā poʻe ʻōpio - a i ʻole nā hoaaloha - aia ka wahi, ʻaʻole ia. Ua hōʻike nā poʻe ʻōpio i ke ʻano o ka ʻike ʻaʻole ia he ʻano maoli, akā, ʻo ia nō naʻe, ke kuhi nei i ko lākou manaʻo. Ma muli o ke kaomi o ka peer pressure, ua hōʻike ʻia nā hōʻike hohonu e, ʻoiai inā ʻike lākou i ke kiʻi wahine ʻaʻole i ka wahine maoli, he mea maʻamau no nā ʻōpio ke hana i nā mea a lākou i ʻike ai i ka porn no ko lākou manaʻo ka mea ka makemake o kā lākou hoahele a i ʻole hoʻokau. Ua hoʻomaopopo lākou he pīhoihoi lākou e makemake e aʻo e pili ana i ka moekolohe a me kā lākou moe kolohe, he mau sex sex zinging a puni o lākou mau kino, no laila ke lilo nei hoʻi ʻo porn i mau ala maʻalahi a me ke kōkua masturbation, a me ke ʻano he hana maʻamau.
Aia anei kēia makemake o kā mākou poʻe keiki e aʻo e pili ana i ka moe kolohe? Ka ʻike ʻana a me ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana i kā lākou makemake i nā moe i kau ʻia i ke ʻano o nā ʻano hana porn i huli lākou iā lākou? ʻO ka pane mai iaʻu a ke manaʻo nei wau he hapa nui loa o kā mākou lehulehu.
He nui a keu aku ka moekolohe a me ka wahine ma ke ʻano he kiʻi like ʻole ma kahi o kekahi wikiō me kahi pahuhopu e hoʻoweliweli ʻia e hoʻoulu. ʻIlepōnaʻi, ʻike wau i ka nui o nā kāne i nele i nā mākaukau koʻikoʻi no ka pili pili ʻana a he nui nā poʻe i manaʻo ʻino i ko lākou kino a i ka "hana" ma kahi o kā lākou i ʻike ai ma ka pūnaewele. ʻO nā mea hou aku, hoʻohālikelike pinepine nā kiʻi porn ia kahi "hana"; ka hoʻohana ʻana i kahi hoa, a ma ka mālama ʻana iā lākou. I ka hōʻeha ʻana, a me ke ʻano hōʻino, ua hōʻike pinepine ʻia ia i ke aʻo ʻana mai ka hele mua ʻana i ke kiʻi i kiʻi ʻia i kiʻi ʻole ʻia a mālama ʻia.
Ua kōkua nō hoʻi wau i nā kuhi he nui i hoʻoponopono ʻia i nā pilikia hana hana i ulu ʻia mai ka hele ʻana i ka wikiwiki, a me ka orgasm mai kahi wikiwiki wikiwiki, e waiho nei i ka mea hiki ʻole ke hoʻāla a hōʻea i ka orgasm i kā lāua moe kime. ʻO koʻu nānā pilikino e pili ana i ka pornstream ma ke ʻano like, e like me ka meaʻai a me ka wai inu, ʻaʻole ia ka huahana e like me ka pehea āu e hoʻohana ai - ʻoiai aia kekahi o nā huahana ma ia mau ʻano ʻekolu o kēia ʻano ua ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi i ka ola ma mua o nā poʻe ʻē aʻe. ʻO koʻu hopena mai ka ʻekolu mau makahiki o ka ʻike mau ʻo ia hoʻi he hana ʻo ia me ka maikaʻi ʻole o ka lawehala.
Manaʻo ʻia nā kūkākūkā makua e pili ana i ke kiʻi porn e hele mai ma hope o ka hoʻonaʻauao kamaʻilio maʻamau, i kapa ʻia ʻo “ke kamaʻilio wahine,” he mea maʻamau ma mua o nā keiki ʻehā a i ʻole paha he ʻumikūmāwalu mau makahiki, inā paha. ʻO koʻu manaʻo ʻaʻole wale nō i hope kēia akā ke koho i ke ʻano he “kamaʻilio” he mea hōʻeha nui ia i nā mea e pono ai.
ʻO ke ala maikaʻi loa a ʻoi loa ka hele ʻana o ka hoʻonaʻauao kamaʻilio ʻana mai ka hānau ʻana a hiki i mua. Hoʻoikaika ka pā pono e pili ana i ke kino ponoʻī a he home. E nānā i ka pīhoihoi i ka maka o kahi pēpē i ke ākea a lākou e huli nei i kēia lima ma mua o lākou, aia i lalo o kā lākou mālama. E nānā i ko lākou hoʻoholo inā hoʻāʻo ʻoe e hoʻihoʻi i ka lapalapa aku iā lākou e hana ana i kahi hana ikaika loa i ka holoi ʻana i ko lākou ulu ʻana, no ka mea ua ʻike lākou i kona ʻano maikaʻi. ʻO ka manawa ʻauʻau a me ka lole ʻaina he manawa kūpono nui e kapa ai i nā ʻāpana kino. ʻO nā keiki i loaʻa i ka ʻōlelo a nā mākua e ola ai ko lākou mau kino a me kā lākou pākiki. E hōʻike kekahi i ka nīnau ʻana i nā nīnau, ʻike ka poʻe ʻē aʻe, hana ʻelua kekahi.
Manaʻo kekahi makua i kona hele ʻana i ke kamaʻilio e pili ana i nā "ʻāpana pilikino", e hilinaʻi; e hoʻomaikaʻi me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa. I koʻu mau lā aʻo ʻana ua hana mua wau i ka wā e haʻi ai i nā huaʻōlelo "penis" a i ʻole "masturbation". ʻAʻole wau i hoʻohana maʻamau i ka haʻi ʻana i kēlā mau ʻōlelo, ʻoiai he wahine heterosexual wahine me ke keiki kāne! Ke kākau nei wau i kupanaha, mea ʻoluʻolu wau i ka ʻoluʻolu a i ʻole hoʻi e pili ana i ka ʻōlelo clitoris, vulva, vagina? Ke kānalua nei wau. I kēia manawa, i kekahi hui, ʻike wau e ʻoka maʻalahi i kēlā mau ʻōlelo.
Ke ulu pū nei lākou nui nā manawa e aʻo aku i nā keiki e pili ana i ka pilikino, ka mahalo, ka leʻaleʻa a me ka ʻae ʻana. ʻAʻole pono kēia mau kamaʻilio a ʻaʻole pono e kali i ka wā'ōpiopio. ʻO ke ala i ka manawa e kamaʻilio e pili ana i ka hana i ka hana ma ke ʻano he mea hana, ʻike mua nā manaʻo a ʻike pono nā kahe o ke kamaʻilio a me nā mākaukau e hoʻohana ai iā lākou. Ua lilo ʻoe i mea hele i palekana no kahi nīnau a hopohopo paha a me nā kumu waiwai a me ka ʻike kumu no ka hoʻolālā ʻana i ka ʻike puke porn. Aia nā alakaʻi koʻikoʻi i ke kūkākūkā e pili ana i ka porn a me nā pono pili a me nā ʻikepili ma kahuaimanakalia.govt.nz , pū me nā hōʻike kikoʻī e pili ana i ka noiʻi ma kēia kumuhana.
ʻO kaʻoiaʻiʻo, ʻo ka mea āu e hoʻohālikelike ai i nā makahiki o kāu mau keiki e ulu aʻe ana ka hopena ma mua o ka mea āu e ʻōlelo ai. I ka wa i kūkulu ai ʻoe i kou ʻohana i kahi moʻomeheu o ka kūkā kamaʻilio ʻana, i kekahi manawa e lohe ʻia ʻoe i nā hiʻona e like me nā mea āu e makemake ai e hāʻawi aku i kou poʻe ʻōpio. Akā inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e hōʻike i ka makemake a mahalo i kā lākou ʻike, no ke aha lākou e hoʻolohe ai a noʻonoʻo i kāu? A inā hoʻohewa ʻoe i kekahi o ko lākou mau manaʻoʻiʻo a koho ʻana paha, no ke aha lā lākou e hele mai ai iā ʻoe i ka wā e hilahila ai a makaʻu paha paha lākou i ka mea a lākou i ʻike ai i ʻike ai. Aia nā ala e hōʻike ai i ka hopohopo e pale ai i ka huhū ʻana.
Hiki i nā mākua ke kōkua nui i kā lākou hana e kōkua ai i kā lākou keiki i ka ulu ʻana i ko lākou ʻano pilikino a me nā hilinaʻi. Hāʻawi ʻia kā mākou mau kula e hāʻawi i nā hola 12-15 o ka aʻo ʻana i kēlā me kēia makahiki mai ka wā kamaliʻi a hiki i ka hopena o ke kula ʻelua. Ma kahi kaumaha paha kēia ka hoʻonaʻauao ʻana i ka liʻiliʻi i loko o nā kula, akā i ka wā i loaʻa ai iā mākou nā kumu āpau i hoʻomaʻamaʻa ʻia a ʻike ʻia i ka ʻike pilikino i loko o kā lākou mau haʻawina, e lilo hoʻi i hana hou i ke kōkua ʻana i ka poʻe ʻōpio he mālamalama a maikaʻi. kekahi mau manaʻo nui. A laila ma hope lākou e lilo ai i mau mākua no lākou ka hana. Maikaʻi ʻiʻo wau he, pū, hiki iā mākou ke hoʻomākaukau i kā mākou mau keiki no nā mea a lākou e ʻike ai e pili ana i ka moekolohe a me ka moena i ko lākou wā ola.
ʻO ka mahalo, pono wau e hoʻopau i kahi leka laka. ʻO nā keiki ʻaʻole i hoʻomākaukau ʻia i hōʻike ʻia i ka porn e like me ka hōʻino o ka moekolohe. E hopohopo paha lākou a hopohopo paha paha lākou i ka mea a lākou e ʻike ai, me ka hopena o ka hopena trauma a me ka hiki ʻana o nā pilikia kelepona ʻo nā kāne e pili ʻia ma luna. Ma mua i ke kamaʻilio ʻana o nā keiki i nā hihia o ka moekolohe me nā mākua, e hōʻike hou i kēlā mau ʻike a loaʻa i ke kōkua a lākou e pono ai e hoʻoponopono a hoʻoponopono i kā lākou ʻano. Makemake nā mākua / ʻohana a me nā kahu hānai e pale aku i nā keiki a me nā ʻōpio e hiki ke heluhelu i ka hōʻuluʻulu ʻana i nā ʻanoʻano maʻamau i kēlā me kēia makahiki. Noa i nā keiki. ^ E Ha yM. Hoʻonohonoho ʻia kēia e ka poʻe akamai loea ʻO Toni Cavanagh Johnson.
Ma ke kaʻina hana o ka puke ʻana, i kaʻu hoʻomaʻamaʻa e like me ka ʻomaʻomaʻi a ma koʻu ola ponoʻī, ke kani leo nei nā mana like a me ka manawa: ʻo ka wehe a me ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ka mea nui i nā pilina a pau, a ma lalo aʻe nā mea a mākou me kā mākou mau keiki a me nā ʻōpio. Inā 'oe e hana i kou home he wahi palekana kahi e kamaʻilio ai nā keiki i nā mea a lākou i ʻike ai ma ka pūnaewele me ka hopohopo a me ka hilahila, e lilo ana nā mea i ʻike ʻole ʻia ʻole o nā kiʻi i nā kiʻi.
He loea lapaʻau lāʻau ʻo Robyn Salisbury, ma ke kolamu ʻoihana ma ka lā Lāpule a kākau ʻia a Hoʻokaʻawale i nā Keiki: Ke pale aku i ka hana hōʻino kino i nā keiki ma Aotearoa / NZ.
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