I finally came! 90 days have cured my ED, but I still have a way to go.
I am over two months into nofap. It has been a crazy ride, and I wanted to share my experiences.
First three weeks:it was pretty easy at first. Honestly, I expected to be a lot harder, but once I decided to give up, I never had any big temptations at first. Also, early on I got a big boost of testosterone. I met a girl four days and we started dating. I have to say when I was with her at first I had crazy painful blue balls. We had sex at some point, but I still was not able to really feel good, though it was a somewhat enjoyable.
I begin to gradually decrease into flatline. I have a weekend that I spend with my girlfriend. By the end of it, I feel very disconnected to her and to people in general. I feel nonsexual. I'm sick of touching her and doing sexual things. I have very little drive.
Week 5 and 6
this week was extremely tough for me. I have never felt so depressed and nonsexual. I got sick of talking to my GF, even though she's very cool. I didn't want to do sexual things, and all the sudden her mouth and her smell was appalling to me. I decided to break up with her, because I wasn't happy, and I wanted to be alone. I don't regret this now. There are plenty of fish in the sea. In addition to my apathy with girls, I was extremely unmotivated these weeks. While I normally do it hot yoga regularly during these two weeks I didn't do it once. I have no real temptation to fap. My libido is so low. I recognize girls are attractive, but sexually I desire nothing.
Last 3 weeks:
I have never felt so horny in my entire life. If you have trouble approaching woman now, when you know you can't masturbate when you get home and you are constantly getting boners, you will start talking to girls. Seriously I'm going crazy right now. I want sex so bad. Before in my life, I thought I was not a very sexual person. I thought, I'm just not into sexuality that much. I was so wrong. It was merely suppressed, and now it is being unleashed. In addition, I've noticed my voice is a lot deeper right now. In addition, my memory is really good. People are amazed that I always remember their names. I don't know if these things are from not fap ping, but I'm happy about that. I am able to endure pain and focus longer. I really hope this continues, though the horniness drives me crazy sometimes.
Some other things I want to comment on:does no fap increase your motivation?:
I don't think not fapping magically will make you motivated and successful. However, I think the biggest reason that I am doing a lot better in a lot of areas of my life, is that choosing not to fap is a decision to go against the instantaneous pleasure, for long-term happiness and success. When you start making this decision on a daily basis, I believe that habit will start to affect other areas of your life. I might think, hey I'm giving up FAP ING for my long-term happiness, maybe instead of eating this high carb meal, I should eat something healthy.
I have no problem getting and maintaining an erection with a condom on now. I have still not had an orgasm with a girl yet, but at the very least, I know the girls can really enjoy sexuality with me.
What to do when I reach the 90 day mark - Also, I'm debating what I will do when I reach the 90 day mark. I intend to cut out porn from my life forever, but I might resume fapping but I'm not sure yet. According to your brain on porn, fapping is not a problem, porn is. I already feel more attracted to real woman now and less to weird fetishes.
I waited to post my 90 day post because I was planning on having sex with some girl and I wanted to relate how it went in my 90 day post.
A little background on my journey into NoFaP. I lost my virginity one year ago, and I had ED problems. I sometimes had trouble getting up, but mainly the problem was that I would last forever and never cum. Towards the end it would always be miserable, and eventually I would get tired just stop. I thought it was because I was on this drug because I have neurological pain problems. I stopped taking the pills, but when I had sex nine months later, I was still having problems. I searched the Internet and discovered your brain on porn. I immediately quit cold turkey, and did not relapse. I realized that porn was destroying me as a man and a completely needed to stop.
I then 4 days into my NoFAP journey, started dating some girl. While I enjoyed the touching and physicality in general of the relationship, when we actually had sex, I did not enjoy it still. That, and the flatlining I went through during the relationship, led me to break up with her.
Two months into my journey I had sex with a girl. I also did not enjoy it. And I still did not cum, though I had no problems getting and staying hard with a condom on.
This last month I have been extremely extremely horny at times. I've also noticed that I think some of my interest in fetish porn has died down, and I am more into real woman.
Anyways, 95 days into my journey I had sex with another girl. I finally was able to cum with a condom on. I didn't last very long the first time once I was inside her. This is very new to me. We had sex again 30 minutes later. I think because of NoFaP, my Dick is a lot harder. During our second session she came three times, while she was on top. Then we switched, and I came again.
While I am happy that I finally was able to actually ejaculate, my orgasm was not as good as an orgasm I'd have during masturbation. However, I think more time and experience, things will get better. I do not think this is the end, but merely the beginning. In addition, I still feel an uncomfortable distance emotionally and physically from my partner after being sexual. I hope this will improve in time as well.
I started NoFAP in May of 2012 because I had delayed ejaculation (sex basically sucked) and I wanted to enjoy it. I found out about your brain on porn, and I quit cold turkey and didn't relapse once. During the next three months I had sex with 3 different girls, and for the third girl, I finally came for the first time. However, after that, I ran into a lot of difficulties. I was meeting girls, but all the good ones weren't seeming to go for me. They all have boyfriends it felt like.
I had originally said I would probably integrate occasional masturbation after I recovered. I hit on some girl one night, and we connected but she also had a boyfriend. I thought to myself, there's no way I have a chance with this girl, so I might as well masturbate to her. It felt really good and at the time I didn't regret it. However, I masturbated seven times in the next two weeks. While I still had motivation to go out, I noticed it dwindling. My brain had relearned that it can get action if this doesn't work out.
Then in late November, I decided to stop again to really motivate myself to meet women. While I miss it, I feel that the benefits a lot more strongly this time. I think it is really helped me both approach girls and make moves on girls (go in for the kiss). You see, before, if I saw some really hot girl and I didn't go talk to her, I could masturbate to her, or the thousands upon thousands of girls online. However, now I will agonize in painful hornyness for hours. After a while, your brain learns that the discomfort of approaching someone is far less than the pain of not approaching them. Now when I go out, I don't have to push myself to socialize with people and girls. I just want to, and it just sort of happens.
In conclusion, I think in order to meet girls, you have to push yourself through an incredible amount of discomfort in social interaction and move out of your comfort zone. A lot of people do this out of sheer willpower, but this is very difficult. A lot of people burn themselves out during this. I believe the hornyness you feel should be the driving force that makes you meet women, not willpower. Meeting women is not a chore for me anymore, but a pleasure.