Alter 23 - Et ass méi wéi 6 Joer well ech Porn gekuckt hunn

Let me start this by saying I am somewhat new to the NoFap Reddit community, but my journey to giving up pornography started a long time ago (6 years ago infact).

A short story of my life: I began looking at pornography when I was 12 (I’m 23 now) and was fully addicted for 5 years. In those 5 years I have seen some things that are so utterly shameful that it scares me to think of where I would be today if I hadn’t gotten out. This includes beastiality, incest (my family sadly has a dark history involving incest), and pedophilia (my excuse was I was looking at girls my own age, which was true, but I know it would have continued into my adult years). Writing this now it’s crazy just to even look at those words, to believe that was me is so sad. I know this community is not necessarily based on religious beliefs, but for me I would still be that person if it were not for God changing my life through Jesus Christ, and through the people he put in my life to show me what true love is.

I met a girl when I was 15 and we had a wonderful relationship. Looking back on it with the beliefs I have now I wish that I would have commited to wait until marriage to have sex with her. But that point aside, we had a very healthy sex life and I was the happiest I had ever been… but I never stopped looking at porn. To make a long story short my addiction to porn along with other various issues with my home life eventually destroyed the relationshp I had with a truly amazing girl.

It was out of this pain that I realized my life needed to change. I began the fight to give up porn and to commit myself to God’s will for my life. It was over a period of a few months that I fully gave up porn, but it has been years of reconstructing my mind to view women in an appropriate and healthy way (I had an emotionally incestual relationship with my mother [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_incest ] so that didn’t help with my view of women). : End short story

I believe that to look at a woman with lust is, in a persons heart, the same as having sex with them. I also believe that the most joyful sex is sex enjoyed by a man and a woman who have commited their lives to one another, that in marriage a couple can enjoy sex to the fullest with no shame, no guilt, and no fear.

Although some of my beliefs might not line up perfectly with everyone else here on NoFap, I truly appreciate and respect each and every one of you for making a conscious effort to put an end to this vile habit that has plagued both our culture and our personal lives.

Keep fighting the good fight!

P.S. Me and the girl from the story still have a very good friendship, regardless of all we have been through. Who knows, there could still be something there… Someday I may be able to top this story off with an ending of full circle healing and redemption 🙂

 

LINK - My deep appreciation for NoFap.

by Romans_I_XVI