Fillt méi no an méi mat menger SO an all ronderëm houfreg. Liewen ass wierklech gutt

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You should have fun with your food. Meaning you should take your reboot seriously because it’s good for you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. I’m going to tell you my success. Where I started, my journey here, and how even though I’m one year one month and two weeks PM free, I still have to work every day to stay successful.

Sixty-five days ago I had a relapse, well what I consider a relapse. I looked up sports illustrated swimsuit issue using and app on my phone. I knew it was wrong and I did it anyway, and if my SO hadn’t caught me I probably would have fallen a lot further down the rabbit hole. She was furious with me and all the success I had previously achieved was moot. In her eyes I had completely failed and let her down, and I had. It really open my eyes to how much I love her and how I couldn’t lose her. How stupid I was for choosing pictures over her.

For me my P addiction started when I was nine. I found my dad’s nudy mags in the garage and started looking at them. Not M’ing just looking. It was the feeling of I know I’m doing something wrong and I like it, so I kept doing it. Around thirteen is when I started PMO. I always felt guilty afterwards but kept doing it anyway. Later when smart phones and the internet became so popular and accessible my addiction only got worse. It started to affect my work and my relationship. I suffered from PIED, and I couldn’t focus.

After I relapsed and my whole world came crashing down I knew I needed to change. That’s when I admitted I have an addiction. I started to make real changes in my life. My SO found nofap and started journaling. I started looking for ways to rebuild trust in our relationship. Some of the things I did was I started my Promise List and I redid the Boundaries List my SO and I had written together. I also started seeing a councilor to talk about my addiction.

Slowly I’ve been getting better. I don’t miss P at all. I feel closer and more connected with my SO and all around happier. Life is really good. I know I have a long way to go and am still learning and getting better every day. I know this kinda short but I wanted to keep it that way and not drag it out. All I can say is that it gets better, and the grass, in this case, is greener on the other side. If you’ve read this, thank you, and I hope this blip into my story can be helpful to anyone who is trying to get better.

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by Rock_Star