My Brain is rewired. Now it's just time to reinforce it.
So I was sitting in the bathroom, the computer in front of me, with erotic photos of my girlfriend as wallpaper. I leaned back. Suddenly, I was exactly in the position I've been for 10 years or so of PMO. It was the same context : I was leaning back in this particular way, looking at some erotic stuff as wallpaper. For YEARS, it has been the beginning of my PMO routine. I felt nothing. Nothing else than a healthy and true desire for my girlfriend. PMO didn't even crossed the borders of my mind. My brain is rewired. Now it's just time to reinforce it. That's so awsome. I'm close to crying.
Now I'm going to do something with my life. Brothers, do it. 100% worth it.
LINK - Brain rewired
UPDATE - I'm comitting again
I'm posting this in hopes that I will find some encouragements.
I discovered Nofap something like a year ago. I managed to end up with a 162 streak and find my first real sexual partner.
Now, after I broke my streak (10 months ago), I'm used to masturbate around 5 times a month and maybe one time with porn.
However, I've noticed that :
- each time I masturbate, I spend the following week in a bad mood and I can't enjoy anything
- each time I masturbate, I end up doing nothing with my time, sleeping 12 hours a day which is bad since I'm in college and need to work
- I have a heart disease. My doctor said specifically to me 2 months ago that this is due to excessive masturbating and orgasming too much. I also have dead serious lungs issues because of that and he was very clear that if I kept on like this I would see my life's expectancy significally reduced. According to him I can masturbate all I want, watch all the porn I want but I must NOT ejaculate. I've done that too much and it has destroyed my body.
- because masturbating transforms me into a ghost of who I am, I have a much more less satisfying life : early to get out of bed, doesn't enjoy the simple things, always grumpy and without energy, no interaction with women. There are so many downside of masturbating and orgasming that I can not list them but you get the point.
So here is my challenge. Well actually, no, it's my reality now. Masturbating has impacted my health, my wealth (not making money because too lazy/too tired) and my relationships with women (obviously, who would want to be with someone who stays at home alone and jerk off at pixels rather than going out and having fun?).
I am not going to fap or edge for 90 mother-fucking days.
However, I know things need to change in order to reach my goal. For instance, internet. I have a filter but I can tell you, I always stumble upon a sexy image. So, no internet anymore. I will use it to check my e-mails and come here and that's it. Good-bye reddit and my other favorite websites, I have plenty of more interesting books to read anyway. So I will use the time I usually spend on internet, doing nothing, reading, playing guitar or focusing on my health (I have specifics exercices the doctor gave me to improve my condition. I tried them once and it helps tremendously. However, I often have a lot of excuses not to do them)
I will also keep up with sport. When I stop doing sports, everything falls apart.
So here I am. 90 days. Jeez. That's a mother-freaking high number.
All advices welcomed, they will be needed.