Dear Sugars, Should I marry my porn-addicted fiancé? With Noah Church

Listen to the episode here. Cheryl Strayed (author of Wild) and Steve Almond invited me onto their wide-ranging advice podcast “Dear Sugar Radio” to help them tackle the issues of porn addiction and problematic porn use in a relationship. Together we answer a letter from “Unsure”, who is engaged to a man who can’t seem to stop using porn and (worse) lying to her about it. We also cover my story and general info about porn addiction and porn-induced symptoms.

Age 29 - My brother and I both quit porn

Hey guys, I'm 29, I've been involved in the nofap community for about 2 years. I've probably had 4-5 streaks of over 10 days, the longest being 24 days. This time is so much different than before. A) I'm completely hardmode B) I also quit drinking at the same time, so I'm feeling pretty holy right now.

No more floppy dick!

I haven't posted here in over a year, and my flair hasn't been updated for a long time. But guess what? My flair is up-to-date. The last time I fapped was in September 2015. The last time I had an inexplicable floppy dick was in January 2016.

Age 37 - First date in months

Will try and sum up my life here. Quit booze this year and made lots of positive changes in my life, cutting out negative things, took up positive things. On way to sorting out finances, sober all year, diet/exercise/weights good at times, overall ok. Quit porn/fap 32 days ago.

Age 20 - Greater pleasure in the simple things in life, More confidence, Assisting people has become more automatic, Function better at work & social gatherings

I have been trying to quit for the past two years, and this is the first streak where I have gone more than a month without masturbating. I quit porn because I wanted to experience more of my emotions, and handle them like normal humans do. It really blunts me, it didn't bother me until I became aware of how cold and callous I was compared to others.

Age 24 - PIED & escalated to HOCD and weird abusive porn: I didn't think I'd ever be normal again

I have successful sex once every other day with no added help. This is a big success for me as I didn't think I'd ever be normal again or get a normal erection real life with a girl due to so many failed attempts. I love my life now the only problem is I am too horny for my gf! She can literally rub her bum against me and I am rock hard  for ages.

Decoding AASECT's "Position on Sex Addiction"

We have written about the public “debate” over sex and pornography addiction, and have been especially critical of news stories that attempt to reduce complex issues into simplistic headlines.  Intentionally or not, news articles blaring “Porn/Sex Addiction Isn’t Real” perpetuate the stigma of problematic sexual behavior. 

Age 29 - I'm feeling actual feelings, More outgoing, Connecting with people more, I have a girlfriend

I’m a smart and disciplined guy. I believe in learning from the mistakes of others. I know that I swing into the extremes of things (oh doing magic tricks are cool… so I’ll spend all my time learning magic tricks). I was warned about tobacco and alcohol. I’ve never tried either because I knew that I didn’t want to get hooked and wanted to be happy without them. No one ever warned me about the perils of masturbation.

Do Women Get Addicted To Porn?--Jessica's Story

Jessica Harris shows us that porn hooks many women too and discusses how it distorted her self-image, her relationships, and her sexuality:

Check out her site:

-Noah Church

Age 21 - I no longer objectify women, My ability to connect with people is stronger, Feel like a new man

Hello everyone! A little background about me, I am a junior in college who is now once again undecided. I have been participating in challenges from this sub for years and my longest streaks have been around 100-110 days. I am about to break my record and go even further on my NoFap journey.

Age 23 - I was VERY skeptical: even on Day 161 I’m still experiencing more and more

It's this Empowering, Loving, Liberating energy that i have now, I still can't believe it. And the strangest part is when I started nofap, I was VERY skeptical, which in a way worked in my favor because I DIDN’T EXPECT ANYTHING. I thought it was nonsense. But it's these feelings all mixed together and it makes you say "No matter what happens in my life or what happens around me, I know everything will be fine, and I will keep moving forward!"

Age 20 - First time having sex in a year

Past history:  started masturbaiting around 14...... got heavily addicted around 16,17 ........ started masterbaiting about 2-3 times a day ........had a relationship for 4 years we broke up ......then when i tried getting with another girl THATS WHEN I REALIZED I HAD CHRONIC ED. Its been a little over a year now , i faced extreme anxiety and depression .....waking up everyday not feeling anything down there scared the living hell out of me ....... i go to a counselor here at college ..... i really thought life was pointless ..........UNTIL YESTERDAY EVERYTHING CHANGED

Age 26 - My erections are harder of a magnitude of 1million. Simply the thought of kissing my girlfriend is enough to stimulate a full-chub - is this real?

I relapsed a few times so far but I can happily say that I've watched porn 5 times in 2 months which is incredible considering that it would normally be 60+ times in 2 months. Despite those setbacks, and badge resets!!! :'( - I am proud of myself for continuing the struggle. I'm still masturbating when I feel too crazy but I still feel magnificent.

Age 36 - I don't believe in super powers, but I definitely have changed for the better.

I sometimes get exposed to [porn] with popups but I just close them and they don't do anything for me. Not even curious. Really not interested anymore. I've noticed a huge difference in my social anxiety & shyness. I look people in their eyes and people want to be around me because I’m in such a happier more positive mood. I really feel happy, clear minded and I feel like i smile more and laugh. I definitely talk to people more and I don't worry about what they think.

NoFap cured my delayed ejaculation

Results of NoFap: It has been 3 months without any P or M, only sex with my wife. About 80% of the time now I can finish inside of her in about 10-15 minutes. This is real success in my book, (and my wife's).


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