Porn Zingathandize Ubale, Koma Pitirizani Kusamala. Amanda Pasciucco LMFT, CST; Wendy Haggerty LMFT, CST (2016)

Chikondi: Zithunzi Zingathandize Ubale, Koma Pitirizani Kusamala

TERESA M. PELHAM

Vuto lalikulu la zolaula ndilokuti limapanga zoyembekeza zosatheka. Chabwino, ndi zina.

Kubwerera pomwe zolaula zimatanthauza kuti tipeze Playboy kuchokera m'sitolo yosavuta mumsewu, sitinamve zambiri za anthu omwe ali ndi zizolowezi zolaula kapena zolaula za erectile.

(Kwa kanthawi, chonde taganizirani zomwe mbiri yakafufuzira pa laputopu yanga idzawoneka ngati nthawi yomwe ndatsiriza kulembera ndimeyi. Inde, ndikuyenera kuyang'ana. anasiya zambiri zofunidwa.)

Koma lero, makanema osatha amatha kuwonekera pa kompyuta kapena pa foni yanu ndikudina batani. Ndipo ngakhale kupezeka kosavuta kokha kumatha kubweretsa ena mwa mavutowa, akatswiri amati ndi zochitika zachiwerewere zomwe zitha kubweretsa zovuta m'chipinda chogona.

Olemba za kugonana amanena kuti owonerera akamadzilola okha kudya chakudya chokwanira, amai okondwa kwambiri, akhoza kukhumudwa pamene akukumana ndi munthu wamaliseche.

"Pali kulumikizana pakati pa amuna omwe amaonera zolaula komanso kulephera kwawo kudzutsidwa ndi anthu m'moyo weniweni," akutero a Amanda Pasciucco, wothandizira zachiwerewere ku West Hartford. “Amadzimva kukhala opanda chiyembekezo ndipo wokondedwa wawo sangapikisane. Matupi omwe amawawonawa siowona. ”

Ndazindikira kuti zolaula ndizongopeka ndipo siziyenera kuwoneka ngati chikondi pakati pa anthu azaka zapakati omwe ali ndi tsitsi lakumbuyo ndi ziwalo zogwa. Koma pamene malingaliro amangowonedwa ndi aliyense, ndikosavuta kulingalira zovuta mtsogolo,.

Aphungu a Pasciucco a misinkhu yonse, ndipo akunena kuti njira yobwereranso ku chiyanjano chabwino cha kugonana ndikupanga malingaliro pamodzi.

Iye anati: “Kambiranani zomwe mungachite kuti zibwenzi zawo zithandizire,” akutero. “Kondwerani ndi munthu amene muli naye.”

Malingaliro anu? Ine ndimaganiza kuti ife tikukamba za, mamembala ena am.

Koma kafukufuku wasonyeza kuti pali kusiyana kwakukulu pamomwe ubongo umachitikira mukayang'ana chithunzi chodikirira ndikuwonera kanema. Pasciucco akuwonetsa zolaula zamasiku 90 mwachangu kuti "akhazikitsenso gawo losangalatsa la ubongo."

Chifukwa cha zolaula zomwe zimapezeka mosavuta, kafukufuku watsopano akuti azaka zapakati pomwe anyamata amayamba kuonera zolaula amakhala azaka 12. (Koma osati ana anu, ndipo ayi.)

"Anthu akagwiritsa ntchito zolaula monga maphunziro awo azakugonana, zimatha kubweretsa zovuta," akutero a Pasciucco.

Wendy Haggerty, katswiri wodziwa kugonana ndi maofesi omwe ali ndi maofesi ku Glastonbury, Guilford ndi West Hartford, akunena kuti pali nkhawa yeniyeni yokhudza zolaula zomwe achinyamata amagwiritsa ntchito.

"Kugwiritsa ntchito mopitirira muyeso kwawonetsedwa kuti kumapangitsa kuti anthu azidzipatula komanso machitidwe omwe angawononge luso lawo lopanga ndi kusunga ubale wabwino," akutero. “Nkhani zokhudzana ndi kuphatikiza kwa chikondi ndi kukondana ndi kugonana komanso zosangalatsa zingayambike. Mavuto okhudzana ndi kagwiritsidwe kake ndi kagwiritsidwe kake ka ntchito nawonso angabweretse mavuto. ”

Koma zolaula sizoyipa kwenikweni pankhani za maukwati ndi maubale, a Haggerty akuti.

“Nditha kukumbukira zitsanzo zabwino zambiri momwe ndawonera kuti zimapindulitsa anthu komanso maubale. Ndawonanso anthu ena ali ndi zokakamiza zomwe zikuyenera kuthandizidwa, "adatero a Haggerty. "Poyerekeza, zolaula zimatha kukhala zolimbikitsa komanso zosangalatsa. Kugwiritsa ntchito moyenera zolaula kungathandize kuti munthu azidzikonda komanso… zogonana. ”

Ine ndi Chibwenzi tidaganiza zoyesa malingaliro ake, ndipo tidawonera zolaula pa Showtime. Kupatula mabere osazungulira komanso osasunthika, owonera sawonetsedwa ziwalo zobisika ndipo ochita sewerowo sachita zogonana. Tidasokonezedwa ndi nyimbo ya bow-chicka-wow-wow ndipo tidakambirana pokambirana ngati oimba omwe akupanga nyimbo zamafilimu olaula amathandizidwadi.

Haggerty anapereka zitsanzo zenizeni za momwe zolaula zingathandizire.

"Wokondana naye kwambiri angaone kuti kudzisangalatsa mothandizidwa ndi zowonera kumakwaniritsa bwino zosowa zake ndikuchotsa kukakamiza kwa omwe akufuna kukhala nawo," adatero Haggerty. "Kuphatikiza apo, wokonda mnzake wapabanja angasankhe kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula ngati njira yolimbikitsira kugonana kwake komanso kuti azitha kupeza zibwenzi."

Kotero, kupatulapo malingaliro olakwika a zolaula zambiri, ndi zakumwa zoledzeretsa, ndi zinthu zoipa zomwe zingachititse mgwirizano, ndi momwe zidakhalira m'badwo wonse wa anthu akugwiritsa ntchito ndalama zochulukira ponyamula thupi, zolaula zingathe Khalani owonjezera pa chiyanjano (osati kwa iwo omwe asokonezedwa mosavuta ndi zoyipa, ndi nyimbo zochepa).

Teresa M. Pelham ndi wolemba mabuku a ana "Roxy's Forever Home." Zambiri: www.roxysforeverhome.com.