Ndinganene moona mtima kuti sindine munthu yemweyo momwe ndidalili pamene ndimayamba izi. Ndili ndi mphamvu yokwanira pandekha, malingaliro anga, zochita zanga. Ndine wolimba ndipo ndili bwino m'moyo wanga. Sindikufunanso mkazi m'moyo wanga kuti andisangalatse, ndimadzisangalatsa. Ubale wanga ndi anzanga ndi abale ndiwofunika, ndimayamikiradi anthu ochepa awa omwe ndimawakonda. Sindimakondanso zinthu zazing'ono, kapena chilichonse. Sindimavutikanso pazifukwa zilizonse (chinthu chomwe chinkachitika nthawi zambiri ndimakhala wokangana). Ndimatha kuyankhula ndi azimayi, kuwayang'ana m'maso, osapereka kanthu. Ndimamva chilichonse, mozama, kwambiri. Ndili ndi moyo tsopano, ndayamba moyo.
Ndidayamba zovuta izi m'mwezi wa 2012. Ndidakhazikika m'maganizo mwanga ndipo ndidakwanitsa masiku angapo a 86. Ndinali kumva bwino komanso osagonjetseka, ndipo m'mene ndinatopa, ubongo wanga unandinyenga, ndipo ndinayambiranso.
Ndimamva ngati zoyipa. Ndinavutika maganizo kwambiri, ndipo kudzimva kuti "kuyesayesa konseku kunali chabe" kunadzaza moyo wanga. Koma, patatha pafupifupi sabata limodzi ndikudzimvera chisoni ndipo 2-3 imatha tsiku, ndidati ndikwanira, ndipo ndidaganiza zoyambiranso.
Anzanga ogwirizana nawo anali chilango, chiyembekezo, komanso chikhulupiriro. Nkhondoyo idamenyedwa tsiku limodzi. Ndinali ndi nkhawa komanso nkhawa, ubongo wanga unkadwala, ndipo ine ndimatha nawo. Ndinali ndi nthawi yayitali kwambiri m'moyo wanga. Kulephera kuyikidwa kangapo sikunathandize konse. Ndinamva kuti ndatsala pang'ono kugwa. Koma sindinataye mtima.
Mkuntho utatha kudakhala bata. Ndinazindikira kuti nthawi zonse kumakhala mdima kwambiri kusanacha. Tsopano ndili ndi chidaliro chokhazikika, chokhazikika, ndikutsanulira kuchokera mkati. Ndili ndi malingaliro amkati kuti chilichonse chomwe ndasankha kuchita, ndikhoza kuchikwaniritsa. Ndizodabwitsa kwambiri.
Izi ndizosavuta. Ndidazindikira kuti ngakhale ndikangobwereza kamodzi, zidanditengera theka la chaka kuti ndisiye kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, omwe ngakhale panthawiyi adakali achangu kwambiri. Kuposa china chilichonse, ndimadzinyadira. Ndimakumbutsanso aliyense yemwe akukayika ngati ayenera kuyambitsa vuto la nofap, kuti ayambitse nthawi yomweyo. Moyo wanu udzasinthiratu.
Ndipo kwa inu omwe muli kale panjira, ndikunena izi. Khalani ndi chikhulupiriro mwa inu nokha. Unabadwa kuti ukhale wopambana, osati wolephera. Panalibe aliyense amene adzalephera pamoyo. Chilichonse chomwe mungasankhe kuchita nchotheka, ngati mungachigwirizane ndi kulimbikira ndi chikhulupiriro.
Mumangogwa kuti mudzuke, njira yokhayo yokula ndikuphunzirira ndikuchita zolakwitsa. Ngati ndikadatha kuchita, inunso mungathe.
Ndipo ngati zinthu sizikukuyenderani bwino, ndipo mukufuna kudzipereka ku zokhumba zanu, kapena ngati mungalole kuti bongo wanu uzikupusitsani kuti mubwererenso, ndikufuna kutchula wolemba waku America Harriet Beecher Stowe: "Mukayamba kulowa pamalo othina ndipo zonse zikukutsutsani, mpaka zikuwoneka ngati kuti simungapirire kwa mphindi imodzi, osataya mtima nthawi imeneyo, chifukwa ndi malo ndi nthawi yomwe mafunde adzasinthire. ” Amuna onse opambana m'mbiri adakumana ndi zovuta, ndikugonjetsedwa kwakanthawi. Koma amunawa adaganiza, ngakhale atagonja, kuti ayesere, kamodzi kokha.
Ndikukufunirani zabwino zonse.
LINK - Kufunafuna kwa tsiku la 90
by BaronJCG
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