Mulungu. Chaka.
Ndizopusa kuti nthawi imangoyenda chonchi, sichoncho? Zikuwoneka ngati nthawi yayitali koma musanazindikire kalendala yathunthu yakudutsani ndipo mwabwerera komwe mudayambira.
NoFap yakhalapo m'moyo wanga kuyambira pomwe ndidapunthwa pa subreddit chaka chapitacho. Koma ndiyamba ulendowu pobwerera miyezi 13 - mwezi umodzi ndisanapeze NoFap.
M'mene wophunzira wanu amayendera Big Ben
Ndinasiya ntchito yanga yogulitsa, nditanyamula chikwama ndikupita kudziko lina (Ndimakhala ku EU, kotero kuti ndi mgwirizano waukulu) ndicholinga chokhala chilimwe chonse. Inali nthawi yopuma ku yunivesite. Imeneyi ndi njira yabwino bwanji kuti mwamuna wamwamuna wazaka 21 adzichepetse kunja kwa nkhawa yodzazidwa ndi chiyembekezo chobwerera ngati "munthu wosintha".
Lingaliro labwinolo bwanji!
Mofulumira milungu iwiri ndipo ndili mnyumba yocheperako ku London, ndikukhala ndi alendo, ndikitsekera mchipinda changa ndikugogoda kuti ndichite zolaula. Ndimaliza mpaka minofu ndikudutsa kwa maola angapo.
Mmodzi mwa anzanga omwe ndimakhala nawo m'chipinda chimodzi anali mwana wankhuku ku Italy. Anali wokongola, nthawi zonse akumwetulira komanso kuvala zovala zowonekera (koma zabwino) kuzungulira nyumba. Sindingathe kulankhula naye. Ndisokonezeni .. Ndimadzimva ndikamaganiza momwe ndimayanjanirana naye. Sindingathe kutulutsa chiganizo, ndikutuluka thukuta osayang'ana kumaso. Ndimamuyang'ananso pomwe samayang'ana. Ndimachita manyazi kunena kuti ndinali WOKHALA wanyumbayo. Amamva zoyipa…
Kupatula zolaula, lingaliro lokhalo lomwe lidabwerera m'mutu mwanga linali "ndikhala mpaka liti mpaka nditabwerera kunyumba osawoneka ngati womasula kwathunthu yemwe adawononga chilimwe, ndikudzitsekera kutali ndi zokumana nazo kudziko lina ? ”.
Ndimakumbukira kuti ndikulakalaka nditangobwerera nthawi osayambiranso ulendowu.
Ndiyenera kunena tsopano kuti nkhaniyi sikutenga mwanjira yankhondo. Osachepera posachedwa. Palibe mwayi wamasewera achikondi mwangozi wokumana ndi msungwana wokongola waku London pa chubu chomwe chimakula kukhala chibwenzi. Chenjezo chabe.
Patatha milungu ingapo ndinali wamisala. Monga ndimatha kudzuka nditagona pabedi langa thukuta lozizira usiku. Ndimadandaula osayima za moyo wanga. Ndinkaona ngati ndalephera.
Kwa milungu ingapo yoyambirira, nthawi zokha zomwe ndimachoka mnyumbayo (ndipo makamaka chipinda changa) ndikupita ku masitolo akuluakulu kukagula zakudya zotsika mtengo (palibe ntchito = ndalama zochepa). M'chipinda changa ndimangolimbitsa thupi, ndimawonera makanema, ndimathamangitsidwa ndipo ndimalota masana.
Anzanga anzanga ankandifunsa ngati ndimakhala ku London kwenikweni. Ndidakonzekera kupeza ntchito koma kuda nkhawa, kukhumudwa, kudwala kwakunyumba, chifunga chaukadaulo ndi kusowa kwamphamvu zidapha mwayi uliwonse wa izo. Chifukwa chake, kuti ndipewe mafunso awo ndinayamba kutuluka mnyumbamo masiku ambiri.
Inali nthawi yachilimwe ndipo ndimayamba kupita ku Hyde Park tsiku lililonse. Ndimangopeza mtengo wokhala ndi mthunzi ndikutuluka pansi pake. Ndimagona, kumasuka kenako ndikuchita mantha ndi momwe zinthu ziliri.
Wonse waku London kuno adzadziwa kuti paki ya Hyde imakhala yotanganidwa kwambiri nthawi yachilimwe ndi alendo, ogwira ntchito muofesi ndi achinyamata onse akusangalala ndi dzuwa. Ndinkangokhala ndekha ndikuonera anthu masauzande ambiri akusangalala ndi MOYO.
Monga momwe mungathere pofika pano, zowonadi zochepa zapanyumba zinali kumenyadi kunyumba. Sindingathe kudzisokoneza pamavuto anga onse chifukwa ndinali yekhayo kampani yomwe ndinali nayo.
Masabata ena owerengeka adadutsa monga chonchi. Ndinaleka. Ndinavomera. Ndinasungitsa ndege yopita kwathu. Ndidanyamula chikwama. Ndidachoka.
M'momwe wofotokozera wanu amayambira njira zake zakale
Ndili ndi anzanga ochepa. Pamaso pazinthu ndimakhala wabwinobwino. Ku koleji ndi ntchito ndimangokhala munthu wamba. Ndilibe mwayi ndi akazi kuyambira mochedwa. Sindine namwali ndipo ndakhala pachibwenzi chakale. Zachikondi kwazaka zingapo zapitazi, chidaliro ndi chilimbikitso zatha. Komabe, ndikuwoneka wabwinobwino. Sindine wonenepa ndipo ndimatha kuvala bwino. Ndine wamwamuna wabwinobwino, makamaka.
Cholinga cha ichi ndi chifukwa chomwechi Fapstraunauts ena ambiri atha kukhala moyo wabwinobwino: Timakhazikitsa miyezo yochepetsetsa ndikuwamatira. Dzukani. Pitani ku koleji. Pitani kukagwira ntchito. Pitani kwanu. Adawombera. Gona. Bwerezani.
Palibe kusiyana. Palibe mayeso. Palibe zovuta. Palibe chovuta. The Sims 3 paketi yofutukula moyo weniweni, ndikuganiza.
Ingodzukani, pitani momwe mukukhalira wamba ndikumapemphera kuti palibe aliyense amene adzagwira dzanja pamanja anu ndikusindikiza Ctrl + H.
Ndidakhazikika m'moyo uno ndipo kwakanthawi ndidakhala wokondwa kwambiri chifukwa sindidawonanso ziwanda zanga monga ndidachitira ku London. Ndipo tsiku lina ndinapeza NoFap.
*M'mene wolemba wanuyo amatulukira NoFap
Sindikukumbukira makamaka momwe ndinapezera NF. Akadakhala kuti anali nkhani ya TED, akanatha kukhala wolumikizana kwina pa reddit. Sindikudziwa ... ndani amene amakumbukira zinthu zomwe amaziona kuti ndizosafunika panthawiyo.
Chomwe ndikudziwa ndikuti ndinayamba kugaya zinthu zambiri za NF (mavidiyo, YBOP, izi / r) m'malo ochepa kwambiri. Ndipo tsiku lina zonse zidangodinidwa. Chilichonse chimandifotokoza bwino. Zomwe zimayamba ndikuwerenga za gulu la anthu aku Internet kuganiza zosiya kudulira mafuta zidatha ine ndikuzindikira.
Zovuta za pagulu. Kuperewera kwamaso. Mantha. Kusowa kwa chilimbikitso. Kuzindikira kwa akazi. Kuyika kwa akazi pazoyala. The chifunga ubongo. Chilichonse. Uyu anali ine ndipo zopanda pake zonse zomwe ndimadana nazo ndekha zimavomerezedwa ndi reddit.
Ndimamva ngati chochitika ku Fight Club pomwe azindikira kuti ndi Tyler Durden - * "Tangotaya kukakamizidwa kwa kanyumba". *
M'mene wolemba wanuyo amakhala chojambula chake choyamba Miyezi ingapo idadutsa ndisanapange chisankho pa NoFap. Sindikukumbukira chifukwa chomwe ndinachedwetsera nthawi yayitali. Komabe, kunali kumapeto kwa Okutobala 2013 pomwe ndidayamba mndandanda wanga woyamba.
Ndinali ndi zokwera komanso zotsika. The ups - oh my sweet jesus the ups. Nthawi zina ndimafuna kulira chifukwa ndinali wokondwa kwambiri. Ndinawona kukongola kulikonse - makamaka mwa akazi.
Sindinawatsutsenso. Msungwana amatha kuseka ndipo ndikazipeza zokongola. Osandimvetsa - sindinayendeyende ndikusilira anthu omwe amaseka. Ndangoyambitsa chidwi ichi kwa akazi chomwe chinali NJIRA yakuya kuposa "mawere abwino / abulu / chilichonse". Ndidayimitsa atsikana omwe ali pamalingaliro pamlingo wa 1 mpaka 10. Ndipo kunena zowona, ndidazindikira kuti atsikana wamba a 10/10 ndiabwino, abwinobwino.
Ngakhale azimayi omwe anali odabwitsa, mawonekedwe a quirky anali okongola.
Ndimangofuna kulankhula nawo ngati anthu. Ndipo ndinatero. Ndipo moyo unayamba kusangalatsa.
Patsiku 28 la streak yanga (ndimakumbukirabe nambala ya tsiku!) Ndinapita kuphwando lanyumba yaying'ono. Ndinali pa gawo "lalitali" la mzere wanga. Sindimapitako kumakalabu / maphwando ndi cholinga chopeza mwayi. Ine sindinayambe ndakhalapo. Ndine wolowerera ndipo sindichita bwino munthawi imeneyi. Sindine wokongola (6 ft 1 ′, osati wonenepa, nkhope yabwino), sindinakhalepo ndi chidaliro chokomera ena ndi zina ... yada yada.
Komabe, ndimangosangalala. Wonyansa. Zolankhulidwa. Zayamba kulira. Woyambitsa.
Anamaliza kukhala pafupi ndi mtsikana wokhala ndi tsitsi lakuda, khungu la porcelain, maso amtambo. Iye anali wokongola. Ndine wotsimikiza kuti tinayamba kucheza kudzera mwa bwenzi la mnzathu kapena china chake (IDK… anali ataledzera). Komabe, amaphunzira mapulogalamu apakompyuta. Tinakambirana za mapulogalamu a Android ndi zinthu zina. Zinali zokambirana zenizeni ndipo ndinali wokonda kwenikweni malingaliro ake. Sindimayembekezera chilichonse chogonana / chibwenzi. Ndimangoganiza kuti anali wanzeru komanso wosangalatsa. Ndinkasangalala kucheza naye.
Mwachiwonekere ndidaganiziranso kuti anali wokongola komanso wokongola, koma monga munthu, osati chinthu.
Kukambirana kunapitilira. Kuyang'ana m'maso. Kupsompsona. Ndikupita kuchipinda chapamwamba kuchipinda chake. Zovala zikubwera. Pogona. Onse amasangalala nazo. Zodabwitsa. Dick wanga sakugwira ntchito. Ndiwokongola kwambiri. Dikirani. Chani?! DICKI WANGA SAGWIRA NTCHITO.
"Ikani chigoba cha oxygen pankhope panu, chotsani mwamphamvu kuti mpweya uyambe kuyenda bwino kuti musakhudze".
Ndangotuluka kumene. Mwadzidzidzi koma mwaulemu momwe ndingathere, ndinangochokapo. Ndine wotsimikiza kuti amaganiza kuti adachita china chake cholakwika. Ndimayendetsa chidutswa cha Rembrandt kuposa momwe angaganizire. Sindingadziwe. Sindinayankhulane naye (chifukwa cha manyazi / manyazi).
Ndinakuwuzani kuti iyi sinali nkhani yachifundo.
M'mene wofotokozera wanu amayambiranso
Masiku angapo otsatira anali ovuta. Chilakolako chobwereranso chinali chachikulu. Pambuyo polephera kwakukulu chonchi nthawi imodzi ndidakhalapo ndi mwayi wonga kuti ndimamva ngati turd. Ndinagona pabedi, ndinkathamanga, ndinali ndi masana ozizira, ndinachezera gawo ili .. chilichonse. Masiku ena ndimakhala bwino ndikumangolemba kuti "zokumana nazo". Masiku ena ndidataya maenje achisoni.
Ndinanena kuti ED ndi kuledzera. Koma mwina zidayambitsidwa ndi PMO. Sindinayambe ndakhalapo ndi vuto ndi chibwenzi changa chakale koma izi zinali zoposa miyezi 18 kuchokera pamene ndinayamba kugonana. Zitha kukhala mwina kapena kuphatikiza zonse ziwiri. Sindikudziwa.
Chingwecho chinatha milungu ingapo.
Kodi mukufuna kudziwa momwe pamapeto pake ndinayambiranso? Ndikukuuzani. Ndimasakatula tsamba la intaneti la mankhwala enaake. Pazifukwa zina za mulungu ndimaganiza kuti ndi lingaliro labwino kudina pagawo la "chidole chogonana". Chimodzi mwazithunzi zowonetserako chinali ndi mtundu, erm, yosonyeza chinthucho. Sindimayembekezera izi. Kuthamanga kwanthawi yomweyo kwa dopamine. Kupsinjika konse ndi chisoni kuchokera kulephera kwanga milungu ingapo mmbuyo zidakwezedwa nthawi yomweyo. Ndinapita mofulumira ku malo olaula. Kubwereranso.
Otsika. Palibe chomwe chinali chotsika kuposa chotsikacho. Ndinagona pamenepo, ndikusowa mpweya ndipo ndinangoika nkhope yanga mtolo wanga. Ndinadziwa kuti ndalakwitsa kwambiri. Masiku 44 akupita patsogolo mu Kleenex woyamwa. O anali zoyipa. P inali zinthu zachilendo zomwe ndimayesera kumenya. M idali yopanda tanthauzo komanso yopanda mphotho.
Mphindi yomweyo, Ndinakhumbanso kanthawi makina. Ndimangofuna kubwerera mphindi zochepa ndikudziyimitsa. Ndinkafuna kudziletsa kuti ndisawononge zochitika zonse zomwe ndinali nazo mwezi watha kapena NF. Kulephera kwanga ndi msungwanayo kunalibe kanthu poyerekeza ndikulephera ndekha. Zotsika…
Upangiri: Kucheperako komwe mumapeza chifukwa chobwereranso kumatenga pafupifupi masekondi awiri musanalowe m'mbuna yolephera.
Kwa miyezi isanu ndi umodzi ikubwerayi ndimapeza masiku 10, 14, 12, ndi zina zambiri. Nthawi zina, ndimangopeza 2 kapena 3. Ubongo wamaubongo umabwereranso. Sindingathe kuyankhulanso ndi atsikana. M'malo mwake, ndinawatsutsa kuchokera kutali.
Nthawi ina mozungulira Marichi ndidakweranso mpaka masiku pafupifupi 30 ndikuyamba kumva pamwamba padziko lapansi. "Mphamvu zazikulu" zidayamba kubwerera. Ndipo pazifukwa zina ndidaganiza zowonjezerapo chisangalalo changa mwakuzimitsa. Maganizo obwerera m'mbuyo.
Sindinakumanenso ndi akazi. Kuda nkhawa kwabwerera. Kusunthira kumanzere. Ndidasiya NF. Ndinaleka kuyendera izi. Wakale ine ndinali nditabwererako. Ndinali chipolopolo cha munthu.
Momwe wolemba wanu amasankha kuti ndi nthawi yoti musinthe, kachiwirinso
Chabwino amayi. Ndi chaka chimodzi nditabwerera kuchokera ku London ndikupeza NF. Chaka. Ndipo, ngakhale ndikupita patsogolo ndikukumana ndi mavuto osangalatsa, ndibwerera kumalo oyamba.
Ndine tsiku 5. Enanso 300 apita. Ndikhala pagawo lalikulu m'miyezi ikubwerayi kuti ndikapereke upangiri, thandizo komanso chilimbikitso. Ndi kulandira.
Khalani abale olimba. Osabwereranso kapena nthawi yino chaka chamawa mukhala mukusewera "bwanji ndikadangokhala ..." masewera. Ndipo zidzapweteka. Zambiri.
Koposa zonse, musachite izi kwa akazi. Osamachita izi kuti mukhale PUA kapena chifukwa mukuyankhula piritsi lofiira (mozama, intaneti ili yodzaza ndi ng'ombe zamphongo. Nditha kuyika zonsezi ngati zoyipa monga zolaula pamalingaliro athu).
Chitani izi kuti mukhale munthu wabwino. Mtundu wamunthu womwe munthu (wamwamuna kapena wamkazi) akamayang'ana angafune kuyankhula nawe. Kapenanso amakuonani kuti ndinu munthu woyenera kulemekezedwa.
Chonde zero.
Zamgululi Moyo suchepera. Chitani.
by Bukowski14
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