Ndine bambo wa 23yo ndipo ndakhala ndikulimbana modekha mpaka ED chaka chatha. Ndinkakonda PMO kamodzi patsiku malinga ndikukumbukira ndipo pamapeto pake zidayamba kuwononga machitidwe anga ogonana. Sindingakhale wovuta konse panthawi yogonana ndipo ndinkadzichitira manyazi ndimayesetsa nthawi zonse.
Ndakhala ndi mwayi wambiri wogonana ndi akazi okongola ndipo mwayi uliwonse udatayika chifukwa cha ED. Ndinayamba kuganiza kuti ndikusintha chiwerewere ndipo sindimakopanso akazi. Ndilibe chilichonse chotsutsana ndi amuna ogonana amuna okhaokha, koma zinali zachilendo kuganiza kuti ndikusiya kukonda akazi kwa akazi. Makamaka ndikadakopeka nawo, ndimalephera kugona nawo. Ndinawerenga za Asexourse ndipo ndimaganiza kuti mwina ndikhoza kukhala ndizosiyana ndi izi. Koma NOPE, ndinangobowoleza ubongo wanga ndikudzisangalatsa nthawi zonse moyo wanga wonse. Ndi pamene ndinayamba NoFap.
Ndakhala ndikuchita NoFap kwa miyezi ~ 7 tsopano ndikubwereranso kwakanthawi kamodzi. Zinatenga kanthawi, koma pamapeto pake ndinazindikira kusintha. Ndinali ndi ED pamene ndimayesa kugonana, koma pang'onopang'ono kumakhala bwino. Koma zinatengera mtsikana m'modzi kuti andiwonetse momwe ndingakonzere ED yanga.
Umu ndi m'mene ndinakonzera ED yanga:
Ndinakumana ndi mtsikana sabata yatha. Koma kusiyana pakati pa iye ndi ena onse omwe ndakhala nawo ndikuti sitinayese kugonana usiku woyamba uja. M'malo mwake ndamuwonapo kanayi ndipo sindinagonanepo. Ndinali ndi nkhawa kwenikweni chifukwa ndinali nditabwereranso ndisanakumane naye ndipo ndimadziwa kuti sindingathe kuzimva. Mwamwayi, sanafune kugonana nthawi yomweyo. Tidakhala usiku wonse tikulankhula ndikupanga (Ndinkasangalala nawo mphindi iliyonse, koma sindinamvepo kanthu mu buluku langa).
Tsiku lotsatira, sindinasiye kuganizira za iye kuntchito.
Tinapita kokacheza masiku angapo pambuyo pake. Nthawi ino tikumaliza masewera, ndidayamba kumva kukwezedwa mu thalauza langa. Zinali zabwino, koma palibe zofunikira. Half-mast inali yonse yomwe ndinali nayo, komanso sindinalandire chilimbikitso chongopanga zaka. Nthawi zonse ndimasowa kukondoweza.
Apanso, sindinathe kusiya kumuganizira akakhala kuti palibe.
Tinapita tsiku lachitatu. Komabe sindinagonane, koma nthawi ino ndikamasewera, ndidakwiya kwambiri! Palibe kukondoweza mwachindunji komwe kumafunikira kumeneko, kumpsompsona kwenikweni. Sizinakhalitse, koma zinandimwetulira pankhope panga kunena pang'ono!
Kuntchito tsiku lotsatira, ndinkavutika ndikungoganiza za iye. Sindinakhalepo ndi zotere kuyambira ku Highschool. Ndipo ngakhale zimakhala zochititsa manyazi kugwira ntchito molimbika, ndinali wokondwa kwambiri! Apa ndipamene ndidazindikira kuti vuto langa lasinthidwa!
Ndinayenera kumuwona tsiku lotsatira.
Adabwera ndipo pomwe tidali osagonana, tidavala zovala zamkati. kupsompsonana, kugwira, kugaya, komabe osagonana. Ndipo zinali zabwino !! Ndinafika povuta kuposa momwe ndakhalira zaka. Ndipo sikuti ndimangogwedezeka mwamphamvu, komanso sichimatha. Ndikadakhala kuti ndasunga mbenderayo kwathunthu kwa maola 4 omwe dokotala akukulangizani !! inalidi mphindi yodabwitsa kwa ine, yosavuta momwe inali.
Sindinagonepo naye ndipo ndikadali ndi njira yayitali yoti ndipezeke, koma tsopano ndikutha kuwona kuwala kumapeto kwa mumphangayo. Upangiri wanga kwa aliyense kunja uko omwe ali ndi mavuto ofananawo ungakhale kuti uuchedwetse. Ngati ndingayese kugona ndi msungwana uyu usiku woyamba, mwina sindinamuwonenso chifukwa cholephera kuchita. Sizinali zakuthupi zomwe ndimasowa, zinali zam'maganizo. Ndinafunika kuti ndipange mgwirizano pakati pa mtsikanayo ndisanagone naye (zowonekeratu, ndikudziwa. Koma zidanditengera kanthawi kuti ndizindikire). Inali sitepe yomwe ndidadumpha ndi wina aliyense ndipo ndidalipira. Sindidzakhalanso PMO ndipo ndidzakhala munthu wabwino chifukwa cha izo.
Zikomo NoFap posintha moyo wanga mozungulira. Ndikufunirani zabwino zonse nanu paulendo wanu kuti musinthe. Osadzimenya kwambiri, chifukwa mutha kudzikonza. Ndine umboni wotsimikizira izi!
BY - womenyedwa
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