Sindinalembedwepo pano koma ndakhala ndikubisalira kwa miyezi ingapo tsopano, Ndiyesetsa osapanga motalika koma ngati ndi choncho ndidzafotokoza mwachidule kumapeto. Nkhani yanga nayi, ine ndili ndi zaka 25 ndidayamba kuthamangira mwina ndili ndi zaka pafupifupi 11, kenako ndidayamba MO'ing ku Magazini ndi makanema olaula omwe ndidaba m'nyumba ya amalume anga. Kenako tinakhala ndi bokosi lakuda lomwe linaba chingwe ndipo ndimatha kutero.
Ndinagonana ndichichepere mozungulira 13 ndipo sindinakhale ndi mavuto, kenako kuzungulira 15 Kuthamanga kwambiri pa intaneti kunachitika ndipo zipata zamadzi osefukira zinatsegulidwa. Ndikanatha maola ambiri, ndimatha kugona ngati 3 kapena 4am ndikungoyamba, tsopano kuyang'ana mmbuyo sindikudziwa momwe sindinawone kuti ndili ndi vuto, ndimangoziona ngati zabwinobwino. Chifukwa chake ndinali ndi GF ngati 16 ndipo ndimakonda kukhala ndi PMO'ing ndipo ndimayamba kupunduka nthawi zina, koma ndimatha kuwadzudzula poti ndabwera kale tsiku lomwelo kuti ndilimenyetse ndiye sizinali zazikulu . Pafupifupi 18 tinasweka ndipo nthawi iliyonse ndikakhala ndi msungwana watsopano sindimatha kuyimilira kapena ndimakhala wolimba komanso ndimakhala ndi nkhawa zogonana motere.
Moyo umayamwa, sindine munthu woyipa ndipo sindinakhalepo ndi vuto lopeza atsikana, koma kudziwa kuti ndikudziwa kuti dick wanga sakugwira ntchito kumangondipangitsa kukhala ndi nkhawa ndipo nthawi zambiri ndimakhala ndi mwayi wogona nawo Atsikana ndipo timagwiritsa ntchito mtundu wina wazifukwa kuti titulukemo chifukwa ndimadziwa kuti mzanga kumeneko sangagwirizane. Pafupi ndi tsiku langa lobadwa la 22nd ndidakumana ndi msungwanayu ndipo timacheza, anali wabwino kwambiri ndipo ndidamupempha kuti akhale GF wanga ndipo adati inde, tangoganizani kuti nthawi yoti tigone idafika bwanji sindinathe kuvuta. Ichi chinali chinthu chokhumudwitsa kwambiri, chidadya tsiku langa lonse, ndizo zonse zomwe ndimaganizira. Chifukwa chake bulu wanga wopusa adafika kunyumba ndipo ndimayamba zolaula kuti nditsimikizire kuti dick wanga akugwirabe ntchito. Takhala limodzi zaka 4 tsopano ndipo Dick wanga wagwira ntchito kuno ndi uko, osati maboners abwino kwambiri omwe ndimapeza ndi zolaula.
Zaka 3 ndili pachibwenzi ndiyambanso kuyankhula ndi mwana wankhuku wamkulu waku Asia ndipo nthawi yoti ndikagone ikafika, palibe chomwe chidachitika kumeneko, nthawi yonseyi ndidayimba mlandu pakukhala ndi nkhawa ndipo ndikutsimikiza kuti zikukhudzana nazo koma sizinali chifukwa, PMO anali. Pambuyo pake dick wanga amatha kugwira ntchito apa ndi apo ndipo ayenera kuti adazikonda mokwanira kuti andilole kuti ndimuchite, koma miyezi ingapo yapitayo idangokhala ngati siyigwira ntchito ndikubwerera ndikupita kukhumudwa koyipa, chinthu chabwino kuti titha kukhala ochepa pomwe tinkasokonekera chifukwa mwina ndikadakhala kuti ndimakhala ndi nkhawa nthawi zonse pomwe dick wanga sankagwira ntchito.
Mulimonse pano akupita tikiti wagolide ndi zomwe zidandigwira ntchito. Chifukwa chake ndimayang'ana zolaula tsiku ndi tsiku, ndimagona usiku uliwonse kuti ndigone, ndikugona pang'ono ndi ola kapena zolaula ndisanafike usiku uliwonse. Nditha kupita ku Google vuto langa chifukwa ndinali nditapanikizika kwambiri za zomwe zidachitika ndipo ndidakumana ndi YourBrainOnPorn mwina 3 miyezi yapitayo, ndidasiya kuyang'ana zolaula kuzungulira 2 miyezi yapitayo ndikupereka ndikutenga sabata kapena awiri. Ndidayesa kuti ndisasewere ndipo ndimatha kuchita izi kwa masiku angapo kenako ndikubwereranso, m'miyezi iwiriyi mwina ndinayang'ana mphindi za 20 zolaula ndikujambula mkati ndikumachita kenako ndikumva ngati ndikuyesera. Komabe ngakhale sindinayang'ane zolaula ndimangopitiliza MO ndikuyamba pang'ono.
Ndiye ndizomwe zidandichiritsa, ndidasiya kuyang'ana zolaula molondola, komabe ndidasiya kukhudza dick wanga, ZOSANGALATSA, Ndikulingalira ndinalinso ndiimfa chifukwa yakhala ikuzungulira masiku 15 ndipo sindinaigwire ndikulingalira. milungu iwiri yapitayo ndinayesa kugonana ndi GF yanga ndipo sindinathe kulimba, sindinathe kulimbana ndi mwana waku Asia kwa miyezi iwiri. Dzulo dzulo ndinagonana ndi GF yanga ndipo ngakhale ndinali ndi nkhawa komanso mantha nditangoyamba kucheza naye ndinali ndi boner wovuta kwambiri ndipo kugonana kunali kwakukulu. Simukudziwa momwe zimamvekera bwino osati mwakuthupi komanso kwamaganizidwe, kenako tsiku lotsatira lomwe linali dzulo msungwana waku Asia amafuna kucheza ndipo ndinakhalanso wamantha kwambiri chifukwa sindimamuwona nthawi zambiri koma kamodzi adayamba kupanga Dick wanga atangoyankha! Ndidakwanitsa kumunyengerera gawo lonselo osachita ofewa! ndipo ndimakhala wofewa nthawi zonse tikamagonana naye. Amuna inu anyamata simukudziwa momwe zimakhalira bwino kusewera ndi atsikana awiri osiyana usiku ndiusana wopanda vuto.
Chifukwa chake musakhudze abale anu achidwi, ngati kuli kofunikira kuti mukhale ndi dick wogwira ntchito ndiye ingozisiyani, musapemphe osachita zoyipa zilizonse, ingogwirani ngati mukufuna kutulutsa kapena mukasamba ndipo ndikhulupirireni maubwino omwe amapeza ndi omwe amalephera kuvuta. Ndizovuta kwambiri koma ndizoyeneradi, mudzakhala ndi ma hardon ovuta kwambiri patatha masiku ochepa koma osawakhudza kapena kuwakhudza! Zitha pambuyo pakangopita mphindi zochepa kenako mutha kugona kapena kupita tsiku lanu. Osanama tsopano ndikupeza maboner pazinthu zazing'ono, ndinawona chithunzi cha Sasha Grey atavala siketi yayifupi ndikulimba, izi zisanachitike sindinayenera kuwona kanema wakugundidwa ndi anyamata ochepa kuti Pezani Dick wanga kugwira ntchito. Tsopano ndikulephera kupsompsona GF yanga ndipo tsopano dick wanga wopanda pake amawoneka wokulirapo pazifukwa zina zomwe ndizabwino.
Osataya mtima anyamata, sungani m'mutu mwanu kuti mutha kuchiritsidwa komanso kuti chinthuchi chitha kugonjetsedwa ndipo mugonjetse, muli ndi mphamvu, tonse timatero.
Chidule
Zaka 25, wakhala PMO'ing kwa zaka 13, akuchita izi pa intaneti yothamanga kwazaka pafupifupi khumi. Ndinayamba kugonana ndili ndi zaka 13 ndikuyamba kukhala ndi PIED pafupifupi zaka 17, chifukwa chake ndathana nawo pafupifupi zaka 7 kapena 8, ndinali ndi nkhawa zambiri ndipo ndimatha kuthana ndi kukhumudwa kwamasabata kapena miyezi nditalephera kukhala ovuta ndi atsikana. Anayamba kupewa zochitika zogonana chifukwa cha nkhawa yoti sangathe kuchita.
Pa 21 Ndili ndi GF yatsopano ngakhale timagonana theka la nthawi yomwe ndinali wochepa kapena sindinathe kuzimvetsetsa ndipo nthawi zomwe ndimakhala wovuta ndimatha kuyenda pang'ono nthawi yogonana. chaka chapitacho ndidapeza msungwana waku Asia wotentha kwambiri ndipo ndimapitilizabe kukhala ndi mavuto pantchito ndipo lingaliro loti lidadya moyo wanga, sindinathe kuthandizira koma kukhumudwa chifukwa ndimamva ngati sindingathe kukhala ndi moyo wamba wogonana.
Miyezi 3 yapitayo ndidasiya zolaula koma ndimangoderabe Edge ndi MO pamaganizidwe, ndipo ndimavutikabe zovuta ngati 5 kapena 6 milungu yopanda zolaula. Komabe masabata atatu apitawa ndidaganiza zosiya kukhudza dick wanga, osadzipaka kanthu pokhapokha nditakumitsa kapena kutulutsa, ndimakwiya kwambiri tsopano ndikungozisiya zokha kenako zimatsika, Mbolo yanga ikuwoneka kuti yakhala ikumverera ndipo nditatha zaka zambiri ndikulimbana ndimagonana bwino ndi atsikana awiri masiku obwerera kumbuyo. Ndinali wamanjenje kwambiri ndi onsewa koma pomwe timayamba kupanga mbolo yanga imangoyankha ndipo panthawi yogonana sindinakhale wofewa! Chifukwa chake muli nacho, ngati muli ndi mphamvu ndipo mutero chifukwa tonsefe timachita izi ndiye kuti musiya zolaula ndipo musiyiratu kukhudza dick wanu, tsopano zimamveka zokulirapo zikakhala zofewa komanso zazikulu zikakhala chilili chilichonse chomwe chinandipangitsa ' nditenge.
Amuna abwino, osataya mtima ndikupitilizabe kugwira ntchito, kaya mukuganiza kuti ndi nkhawa kapena PIED (Mwinanso zonsezo) siyani kukhudza dick ndipo patapita kanthawi idzayambiranso kuzindikira ndipo mutha kukhala ndi moyo wabwinobwino wogonana. Zikomo chifukwa cha nkhani zonse zopambana zomwe zidandilimbikitsa ndikakhala wopsinjika komanso kwa inu omwe mukuvutika, ndikumva kuwawa kwanu, ingokumbukirani kuti simuli nokha ndipo mudzapambana izi.
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