Chifukwa chake sindinaperekeko malipoti a masiku 30, 60, 90 ndipo ndidamva kuti inali nthawi yoti ndipereke. Ulendo wanga wa nofap udayambiranso ku 2005 nditawonera kanema "Masiku 40 ndi Mausiku 40" komanso Seinfeld nyengo ya 4 gawo "Mpikisano". Anzanga angapo ndipo tidaganiza zopanga mpikisano wathu ndikuyika ndalama nawo. Ndinakopeka ndi dvd ya zolaula winawake andilole kuti ndibwereke masiku 20 ndikutayika, koma ndinali ndi chidwi chofuna kudziwa ngati ndingapite patali. Nyengo ya Lenti ikafika ndidaganiza zokoka masiku 40 ndi Mausiku 40. Ndinapangadi. Ndimamva bwino kwambiri kumapeto kwa mzerewu. Koma sindinadziwe zonse za zotsatira za nofap panthawiyo kotero ndinangosangalala chaka chimodzi mpaka Lenti yotsatira. Ndinadutsa masiku 65 kachiwiri, ndi masiku 40 kachitatu.
Sindinadandaule ndi nofap kwa zaka zingapo zotsatira pambuyo pake. Ndikayang'ana m'mbuyo, ndidazindikira kuti nthawi iliyonse yomwe ndidasiya pmo ndimakhala ngati munthu wosiyana kotheratu. Wowopsa kwambiri, ndinali wolumphira kale koma popanda pmo ndimathamanga kwambiri pa zokoka. Umunthu wanga unali wamphamvu kwambiri. Ndinazizindikira pomwe ndimapita ku yunivesite. Ndimangodikira masiku angapo osakhala ndi pmo kuti ndingoona mawonekedwe kuchokera kumakole, koma kupsinjika kusukulu kumatha ndipo ndimathanso kuthawa. Ndinaganiza kuti kuseweretsa maliseche ndi njira yabwinoko yopezera chibwenzi kapena ma fwb angapo ndikuwagwiritsa ntchito pogonana, chifukwa chake ndidakana zomwe ndimalandira kuchokera kwa atsikana okondweretsedwa. Poyang'ana m'mbuyo ndikadakhala kuti ndimamvera kwambiri. Sindingataye nthawi yambiri kuchita zolaula ndikadakhala pachibwenzi chenicheni. Sindinali kwenikweni mkati mwa chilichonse kinky mwina, koma muyezo porny chindapusa. Ndinkakonda kukopana, koma ndinkachita mantha kwambiri kugogoda aliyense kapena kuwagwiritsa ntchito monga cholandirira ndi kusewera nawo.
Pambuyo pake nofap yanga idayambiranso pakatikati pa sukulu, koma panthawi yokhoma. Komabe, panthawiyi, ndimatha maola ambiri kapena ndimakhala wotanganidwa kwambiri kuti ndipeze nthawi yowonera zolaula. Ndipo nthawi zonse ndimabwerera kukakumba pambuyo pake. Mofulumira kwambiri mpaka 2013; Ndinaganiza kuti ndatopa ndikungowononga nthawi ndikumverera ngati zopanda pake. Kusaka ntchito ndi ngongole za ophunzira zitha kuthetseratu kupsinjika, koma si chowiringula kuti musakhale opindulitsa. Chifukwa chake ndidayamba kulembetsa nofap chakumapeto kwa Seputembala nthawi yomweyo ndidayamba madzi a masiku 5 mwachangu. Nthawi yosala pang'ono madzi ndidaphunzira zambiri zakutsimikiza kuposa momwe ndimayembekezera. Zinandithandiza kupitilira mpaka February mpaka nditapeza "dzanja lothandizira" kuchokera kwa mayi yemwe ndimacheza naye. Patatha sabata ndidawonera kanema wa cheesecake 80 womwe umakhala ndi blonde wokongola. Iye anali wamaliseche mu kanema koma sizinali kwenikweni kalikonse kupatula maliseche chabe. Koma zinali zokwanira kuti ndisiyire pomwepo ndipo pamapeto pake ndidadzikongoletsa ku umm… ”kumaliza” patatha miyezi inayi. Ndinaganiza zololera tsiku limodzi ndikutulutsa m'dongosolo langa ndikukhala ndi pmo mpaka Lent.
Chifukwa chake ndidayambiranso zolimba komaliza, ndikukhulupirira, mu Marichi. Ndakhala ndikukwera pamwamba komanso wotsika kuyambira pamenepo. Ndipo amuna, mapamwamba kwambiri ndipo ndi otsika kwambiri, anzanu anzanu, monga ndikutsimikiza kuti mukudziwa bwino. "Mphamvu zazikulu" zachizolowezi zidagwira. Sindinakhalepo ndi vuto loyang'ana m'maso, koma nthawi zambiri sindimayang'ana kwambiri ndi anthu osawadziwa chifukwa chowopseza mosazindikira. Tsopano sindisamala nkomwe. Ndine wolimba mtima kulankhula ndi alendo. Ndimazindikira chilankhulo cha anthu ena. Pofotokoza mwachidule Sherlock Holmes, ndikuyamba kuwona zambiri zomwe ndikuwona. Ndine waukali, koma wodekha kwambiri komanso waulemu. Ndidafunsidwapo ntchito lero ndipo ndidapumira pomwepo, ndinali wodekha komanso wotsimikiza.
Ndimakopeka kwambiri kuposa momwe ndinkakhalira, koma pambuyo poti mwatsatanetsatane, ndakhala ndikugunda kwambiri. Zimakhala ngati ndazolowera kuwongolera, makamaka, ndipo zachilendo zake zatha. Ndakhala pachiwopsezo chazoyambitsa zochepa, koma sindinakule kwambiri (samalani atsikana a cam! Amacheza nanu ndikulamulidwa ndipo ena mwa iwo ndiomwe mumakonda zolaula!). Nditayamba ndinali wokonda kwambiri za chibwenzi, koma posachedwapa ndaziyika pazowotchera kumbuyo. Kuthamangira ma dud ambiri sikunabwezeretse chikhulupiriro changa kuti ndipeze mkazi komwe ndimakhala, inenso.
Komabe, ndili ndi zambiri zoti ndinene koma ndizilola pakadali pano. Ndine wokondwa kuti ndapeza "ubongo wanu pa zolaula.com" mmbuyo mu Ogasiti zomwe pamapeto pake zidapangitsa izi. Ngati simunayang'anepo young-goddess.com, nkhani yabwino kuchokera kwa winawake wazogulitsa zolaula. Onaninso Don Jon kuti muwone zolaula ku Hollywood. Khalani otakataka ndi moyo wanu ndikukhala atcheru. Kumbukirani kuti zolimbikitsazi ndizachilengedwe, koma simuyenera kuzichita ndipo simuyenera kuchita maliseche kuti muwathetse. Mwamuna amasankha. Kapolo amamvera. Osadzitaya pazithunzi ndi makanema. Khalani omwe mukuyenera kukhala. Ngakhale mutagwa patali bwanji, mumatha kuwuka.
LINK - Lipoti la tsiku la 150
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