[Mbiri, Tsiku 12] Ndine bambo wazaka 35. Ndinakwatirana pafupifupi zaka khumi ndipo ndinalibe mavuto konse, kuyankhula zogonana. Komanso, ndinali ndisanawonepo zolaula. Ndinkakonda kucheza ndi mkazi wanga kwa maola ambiri. Kugwira ntchito ndichinthu chomwe sindimaganizira konse.
Atasudzulana zaka 5 zapitazo, ndinali ndekha ndipo tsiku lina ndikuganiza zolaula. Nditangowona koyamba, chinali chinthu champhamvu kwambiri. Zinkamveka kuti munthu wina wabayira pafupifupi botolo la kachasu m'magazi anga, ndipo ndinatsala pang'ono kuti ndiwone. Chosangalatsa chopanda dongosolo. Thupi langa lonse ndipo makamaka chilichonse chomwe ndimachita m'maso mwanga chimakhala chotentha komanso champhamvu, komanso chodabwitsa. Ndinkangoyang'ana zolaula zamtundu winawake (zolaula) zomwe ndimazipeza kuti ndizokongola kwambiri ndipo sizinakwiyire kwenikweni. Koma kwa zaka ziwiri mtsogolo ndikungoyang'ana izi zimandipatsa mayankho awa.
(Ndisanayambe kuwona zolaula sindinakhale ndi vuto ndi ED ngakhale.)
Mofulumira ndipo chaka chimodzi kapena ziwiri pambuyo pake ndinali ndi mkazi yemwe ndimafuna kukhala naye ndipo ndinazindikira kuti ndinali ndi ED wowopsa ndinayesa Cialis katatu koma sizinayende bwino konse. Libido yanga inali kutha. Ndimapita milungu ingapo osakonzeka. Chifukwa chake ndimayesetsa "kudzipezera" ndekha zolaula. Zinthu sizinakhale bwino.
Ndinawona kuti ndikanangodzipatsa erection yabwino poganizira zopeka zinazake. Chosangalatsa ichi chiri pafupi kwambiri ndi china chake chomwe ndachita, koma nthawi zina pamakhala mitundu "yapamwamba". Ndimawerenga zonena zabodza, ndikuganiza, chabwino, ngati malingaliro anga angandilimbikitse, ichi ndi chinthu chabwino. Koma tsopano sindikudziwa.
Komabe, sindikudziwa choti ndichite chiyani pazopeka komanso zolimbikitsa komanso kumva kulira kuti ndithandizirenso kuchira. Ndikupeza kuti tsopano ndikhoza kubweretsa chidwi chongoganiza zogonana, kapena kuyang'ana mkazi. Nthawi zina izi zimandipatsa chiyambi cha kukonzekera. Ndipo nthawi zina ndimamva ngati ndikhoza kukhala ndi vuto pakangoganiza. Ndipo pano tsiku la 12, ndikungoyamba kulakalaka imodzi.
[Tsiku lotsatira] Ndinachita mantha kwambiri ndipo sindinagone usiku wonse.
Ndinayimitsa P chaka chimodzi kapena chapitacho ndipo sindilakalaka kuyang'ananso. Koma nthawi zonse ndikafuna kupuma kuchokera ku MO zikuwoneka kuti ndizosavuta sabata yoyamba kapena apo, ndiye mwadzidzidzi zimangotenga ubongo wanga wonse. Ndimaganizira za MO komanso zosangalatsa zosachepera zana patsiku. Chifukwa chake, inali pafupifupi 6 m'mawa uno ndipo ndimadziwa ngati ndikanangodandaula ndimayamba kugona. Ndinali ndikulimbana kwamasiku awiri ndili ndekha, ndikungofuna O kwambiri. Ndinagonja. Ndinagona maola ochepa, zomwe zinali mpumulo.
Ndiyenera kunena kuti, panthawi yodziletsa ndimamva mosiyana ndikakhala pagulu. Olimba ngati munthu wokhalapo. Kulimba mtima kwambiri. Nthawi zambiri ndimakhala ndi nkhawa ndikuyang'ana pansi. Koma ndimangoyenda ndikukweza mutu, ndikulankhula ndi anthu, ndi zina zambiri. Ndimayenera kupewa kuyang'ana azimayi okongola kumsika kwambiri chifukwa ndimayamba kuzindikira kuti ndatsala pang'ono kuchitapo kanthu nthawi iliyonse, ndipo kwakhala kwakutali kuyambira pomwepo, sindinadziwe choti ndichite.
Koma komabe sindimadzimva kuti ndili ndi mlandu wakubwezeretsanso o-dometer m'mawa uno, chifukwa sindinakhale ndi nkhawa komanso kutopa ndi chikhumbo, komanso, ndili ndi chidaliro kuti nditha kupitilira nthawi ino , makamaka popeza ndidamva pang'ono za momwe kusungaku kungandithandizire.
Tonsefe tiyenera kukumbukira kuti tikulimbana ndi zizolowezi zomwe mwina tidayika kupitilira zaka zisanu, khumi, makumi awiri, ndi magawo masauzande ndi zikwi, zithunzi, kubwereza. Chifukwa chake sizikhala zophweka, ndipo padzakhala ziphuphu zambiri panjira.
[Miyezi ingapo pambuyo pake] Ndinapita masiku 15 popanda PMO nthawi yomweyo isanakwane masiku 16 awa. Pafupifupi tsiku la 13 poyeserera koyambirira ndidasokonekera. Ndimaganiza zogonana kwambiri, komanso mopitirira muyeso, kuposa momwe ndimachitira ndili kusekondale. Ndili pakati pa 30s tsopano. Mwinanso nthawi zana patsiku nthawiyo, kumangolota za izo, kupindika, kumva kulira, kufuna kwathunthu.
Tsopano sizingodutse m'malingaliro mwanga. Zinali kudandaula izi pang'ono. Koma tsopano ndikuyamba kukayikira zomwe malingaliro azakugonana adachita m'mutu mwanga. (Ndakwanitsa kuzipewa pafupifupi kwathunthu nthawi ino.)
Ndikuganiza kuti ayenera kuti nthawi zonse amangokhala othawa kwathunthu, osalakalaka kulumikizana ndi mkazi. Chifukwa chake lero ndimayenda mozungulira masitolo. China chake sichimachitika kawirikawiri. Ndipo zowonadi panali akazi ena okongola kumeneko, ndipo ndinayang'ana ena a iwo, koma sindinasokonezedwe kwenikweni, monga momwe ndakhalira. Sindinachite mantha kwenikweni.
Ndipo pambuyo pake, ndili m'kalasi ndi azimayi omwe ndakhala ndikuganiza nawo kwazaka zambiri, nditamaliza kalasi ndimaganiza kuti anditsata kupita pagalimoto yanga ndikupempha kuti ndigonane. Ingomuganizirani kuti akumuuza mawu, osati zongopeka zogonana. Ndipo ndimaganiza kuti ngati zachitikadi nditha kunena kuti, "Sindikumva kulumikizana kulikonse ndi inu." Izi ndichifukwa choti sinditero. Ndi munthu wabwino chabe amene amapezeka mmoyo wanga. Sindikufunika kulowa nawo malo azakugonana.
Uku ndi vumbulutso kwa ine. Kukhala wokonda zongopeka kumapangitsa zenizeni kukhala zokhumudwitsa. Ngati azimayi amalankhula nanu ndipo mukuyembekeza kuti mudzatha kunena zinazake zoseketsa komanso zokongola kotero kuti thambo limatseguka ndikulowa m'malo oyera oyera otentha, chabwino, mumakhala ngati mukuchita mantha, ndiyeno aliyense ali wovuta.
[Tsiku 22] Kumva kukhala wokhuthala komanso wopanda chiyembekezo. Ingowerenga mndandanda wazambiri pano. Panali positi yolumikizana ndi vidiyo ya malingaliro pa YouTube ndipo ndinalowa nawo makanema oonera zanyumba ndipo pamene banjali limakumbatirana ndikupsompsonana kothera kumapeto kwa kanema ndimangomva kukhudzidwa kwakuya, kozama. Ah, chabwino.
[Tsiku 40]Ndili pa Tsiku 40 ndilibe PMO ndipo ndikufuna kukuwuzani zina mwa inu pa Tsiku 3 kapena 13 kapena kulikonse komwe mungakhale.
Sindinapite patali motere popanda M. Ndinayamba M ndili ndi zaka 3. Sindinawonjezere zolaula mpaka 35 kapena apo. Tsopano ndili ndi zaka 37.
Komabe, kwa ine chinthu chopanda pake chinapita kwa masiku 20, ndiye kuti panali chilimbikitso chachikulu kwa O. Ndikumva kuti ndamwa mowa, koma sindingakhale ndi erection. Masiku ena, ndikakhala ndikumavala nkhonya za silika ndikuyenda mumsewu wophulika, ndimamva ngati ndikhoza kukhala ndi O ndikuyendetsa, ngakhale ndinalibe erection. Basi mafunde ofunda, osakhazikika.
Kungowona, zikuwoneka kwa ine kuti kutsuka kwa chiwerewere chonse popanda erection ndi mtundu wina wotsalira pakuwonera zolaula. Nditangoyang'ana koyamba, ndimamva ngati ndidzakhala ndi O osakonzeka. Ndi momwe zolaula zimakhudzira ine. Ndikuganiza kuti ubongo wanga mwina wangotaya dopamine mopitirira muyeso ndipo inde zimamveka bwino.
Chifukwa chake kwa anthu omwe adawonera zolaula kwazaka zambiri, ndikuganiza kuti kulolerana kuli komweko, ndipo samamvanso kutsuka uku, komabe amafunikiranso zolimbikitsa zolaula kuti azigwira ntchito, ngati junkie yemwe amafunikira mankhwala osokoneza bongo kungomva ngati ali pazoyambira zawo.
Chifukwa chake, nditatha kufunitsitsa kwa masiku ochepa okonda kwambiri O, ndinapita kumalo amtundu wamtundu wina, kwa milungu ingapo.
Pali china chake chabwino pankhaniyi. Kwenikweni, tsopano ndiyenera kunena kuti ndikuganiza kuti ndibwino kukhala bwino ndi flatline. Ichi ndichifukwa chake. Takhala tikulakalaka kwambiri zithunzi zolaula. Osangokhala zithunzi, koma mitundu yolimbikitsira yomwe ilibe m'moyo weniweni. Pazithunzi kamera imayenda mozungulira, chochitika chimodzi chimachepetsa chotsatira, zamatsenga, ndi zina zambiri.
Ndipo chojambulira chimabwera chifukwa tikupezananso ndi moyo weniweni. M'moyo weniweni timadzuka chifukwa takhala pafupi ndi dona pabwalo la zisudzo ndipo amalankhula zinthu zanzeru komanso kusewera ndi tsitsi lake, kapena chifukwa amapitilira timadziti ta madzi a kiranberi ndikuwonetsa ma eyelashes ake, kapena tikungoganiza zopanga kunja ndi msungwana wathu pabedi.
Chifukwa chake, timafunikira kuti flatline ichoke kuchokera kuzowonjezera za dopamine zosokoneza bongo kuti tibwererenso kudzazidwa ndi dziko lenileni.
Ndipo m'masiku angapo apitawa ndakhala. Ndazindikira kuti panthawiyi pakhala pali zovuta nthawi zonse m'mawa, ngakhale nthawi zambiri zimakhala mbali yofooka ndipo zimangokhala masekondi pang'ono ndikadzuka. Koma masiku asanu apitawa kapena apo, ndakhala ndikudzuka ndimaganizo abwinobwino pamutu panga ndipo zokhalazo zakhala kwakanthawi.
Ayambanso kuchitika nthawi ndi nthawi, akuyendetsa galimoto osaganizira chilichonse
Masiku awiri apitawa ndidasainira kuti ndikhale pachibwenzi ndipo azimayi ena adalumikizana ndi ine, ndipo m'modzi mwa iwo akuwoneka kuti ndiwanzeru komanso wodekha ndipo adanditumizira chithunzi chake ndipo chithunzi ichi cha mkazi yemwe wakhala pa tebulo lake chandipatsa njira. Ndiwanzeru komanso wokongola kwa ine. Umu ndi momwe amayenera kugwira ntchito.
Tsopano, ndili ndi nkhawa pang'ono kuti ndikudzuka ndili pa laputopu ndikuyang'ana chithunzi, choncho ndikuganiza kuti mwina ndiyenera kusankha ngati ndingakhale bwino ndi tsamba la zibwenzi, kapena ngati mwina Ndiyenera kuyimitsa mbiri yanga ndikudikirira masiku ena makumi anayi. Mulimonsemo, ndimamva ngati zinthu zikuyenda bwino.
Ndikupita kukavina ndi mzanga yemwe ndimadziwana naye sabata yamawa. Ndiyesera kutuluka ndikungolankhula ndi anthu pang'ono.
China chomwe ndikunena ndikupeza kuti azimayi akuwoneka ochezeka kwa ine tsopano. Amayi okongola omwe samandiyang'ana ngakhale pang'ono tsopano akumwetulira, nthawi zina amagwedeza mutu. Ndikamayankhula ndi akazi, sindimva ngati wopanda pake. Sindikudziwa kuti M-ing kwa masiku 40 amasintha zina zokhudza umunthu wanu zomwe simungasinthe mwachindunji, zomwe mwina simungathe kuzizindikira.
Chinthu chimodzi chomaliza pano. Chifukwa china chokhalira ndi phokoso. Zolaula zabzala zodabwitsazi m'malingaliro athu. Monga kukumana kulikonse kuyenera kukhala kuphulika kwa zogonana, ndipo ndikuganiza kuti mwina zimatipangitsa kuti tipewe kufupika.
Koma kumbukirani, kumangidwa sikatikati pa chilengedwe. Mutha kukhala ndi usiku wabwino kungopita kokadya ayisikilimu kenako ndikupanga chakudya ndikupatsani mayi anu kutikita kumasuka kotero kuti amagona pachifuwa panu chifukwa akumva kuti ndi otetezeka ndipo amakukondani ndipo mumangogona mumdima mumamuyang'ana , wothokoza chifukwa cha iye, ndikudabwa kuti udakhala bwanji ndi mwayi - kwa maola awiri kapena atatu, kenako nkugona, wokondwa.
Ganizirani izi mukamachita bwino. Izi ndizabwino.
Komanso, sindinakhalepo ndi chidaliro chilichonse chofika kwa akazi. Koma popeza ndili tsiku la 40, ndimamva ndikakhala ndi chidaliro nthawi zina. Ndipo ndikuganiza kuti azimayi ali ndi chidwi ndi chidaliro chobisika chomwe sichingasokonekere pomwe tili PMO nthawi zonse kapena kuda nkhawa kuti tidzachira.
[Tsiku 45] (Upangiri kwa wina) Ndi vehehehehehry zowopsa koyambirira kwa PMO chifukwa zimamveka ngati kuti simudzatha kudzukanso, komanso ngati moyo wanu wogonana wapita bwino.
Ine ndi anyamata ena ambiri pamsonkhanowu takhala tikudutsamo kapena tikudutsamo tsopano. Lero ndili patsiku 45 la PMO ndipo zinthu zikuyenda bwino, koma muyenera kukhala oleza mtima ndikulola thupi lanu kuti libwerere bwino. PMO nthawi zonse amakhala ngati mankhwala osokoneza bongo kotero mvetsetsani kuti zitenga kanthawi.
[Tsiku 68] (Upangiri kwa wina) Kufewa ndi kufota ndi gawo limodzi. Inenso ndinachita chimodzimodzi. Ndikanapita sabata limodzi kapena ayi ndikukhala ndi PMO ndikudzipereka chifukwa ndinali woopsa kwambiri, kapena ndikanachita PM ndikuyembekeza kuti ndilipiritsa libido yanga. Izi zinangoipitsa zinthu. Muyenera kudutsa milungu ingapo - anthu ena amapita miyezi - komwe mukuda nkhawa kuti libido yanu ikupita kwamuyaya komanso nkhawa yanu kuti mbolo yanu ikuchepa kwambiri mukuganiza kuti ikubwerera m'mimba mwanu ngati mutu wa kamba.
Ndizowopsa. Zili choncho. Koma ingoganizirani kuti mudzikhala okhwima kuti thupi lanu likhale ndi nthawi yobwereranso bwino. Mukumveka ngati munthu wolangika, othamanga komanso benching. Mwavulaza machitidwe anu azakugonana ndipo tsopano muyenera kuyikapo pompopompo ndikuchiritsa. Ngati ndikadakhala inu (ndipo izi ndi zomwe zimandipangitsa kuti ndisasinthane) ndimapeza pepala, ndipo tsiku lililonse mumapita opanda PMO, mumthunzi m'bokosi laling'ono, mwina musanagone. Mutha kubwereranso kangapo, koma mukayamba "kuthamanga" bwino, mpikisano wanu umalanda ndipo musanadziwe kuti miyezi iwiri yadutsa ndipo mudzakhalanso.
Ndadutsa miyezi iwiri tsopano ndipo zinthu zili bwino.
(Ponena za kuyanjana ndikupulumuka, ndinganene kuti ngati ubalewo sungadikire kwa miyezi iwiri, kapena sungakhale limodzi ndi kuchira kwa miyezi iwiri, ndiye kuti mutenge miyezi iwiri kuchokera paubwenzi. Pali njira zopangira nzeru. mukufuna ndipo muyenera kuyisamalira, choncho ikani patsogolo. Zabwino zonse!)
[Tsiku 69] (Malangizo kwa wina) Ndakhala ndikulimbana ndi kukhumudwa kwazaka zambiri. Ndinganene kuti kuthera nthawi yochuluka pakompyuta nthawi zonse kumandipweteketsa mtima. TV ndiyabwinoko, koma ndimamva ngati ndikungoyizimitsa, chifukwa ndikuganiza kuti imakokomeza. Kulibwino kungokhala ndikuwerenga buku ngati muyenera kukhala. Ngakhale zili bwino, pitani panja ngati mungathe.
Chinthu chapafupi chimatha kukugwetsani pansi mukamaganiza za izi, ndipo ndizosatheka kuti mitundu yachisoni ingokhalani "osaganizira" china chomwe chikuwasokoneza. Chifukwa chakevomerezani kuti muganiza kwambiri za izi koma tsopano yambani kuziganizira mwanjira ina. Ganizani, "Thupi langa likukonza izi tsopano." Simuyendetsa galimoto yanu ikakonzedwa ndipo simumasewera vayolini pomwe ikukonzedwa. Thupi lanu ndi lovuta kwambiri kuposa chimodzi mwazinthuzi. Ndipo tsopano mukuupumitsa. Ichi ndi chinthu chabwino. Imafuna mpumulo kuti ichiritse. Dzikumbutseni za izi nthawi iliyonse mukayamba kuda nkhawa.
Izi ndizovuta, mosakaika konse za izi. Sindikutsimikiza kuti pali njira yochira, koma mutha kuyesetsa kuyigwira, ndipo mtundu uwu wokhudzana ndi moyo ndi njira yabwino. Onani ngati mungakhale ovomereza pang'ono ndikumvetsetsa kwanu. Palibe wangwiro. Palibe amene ali pafupi kwambiri ndi ungwiro. Khalani pamenepo. Khalani okonzeka kwa anyamata anu. Ndibwinonso kukhala pabenchi yapaki kwa maola awiri ndikudya chidebe chonse cha chimanga cha caramel ndikuyang'ana mosazindikira mumsewu. Khazikani mtima pansi pang'ono. Pakadali pano zinthu zakuthupi zimadzisamalira zokha.
[Tsiku 70] Ndikayang'ana m'mbuyo ndekha moona mtima, ndiyenera kuvomereza kuti pomwe ndimayamba ntchitoyi mwina ndinali wokonda kwambiri "kuchita" kachiwiri. Ndinkafuna libido yanga yowonongeka, ndipo ndinkafuna kukhala wokonzeka kuchitapo kanthu.
Koma lero, patadutsa miyezi iwiri, ndapeza kuti libido yanga sikukwiya. Ndikumva chisoni pang'ono, chifukwa pali gawo langa lachichepere lomwe limakonda kusinkhasinkha za mayi aliyense yemwe ndidakumana naye, ndikutsegulidwa ndi zolaula zomwe ndimakonda, ndikukongoletsa, kuzunguliza, kuzunguliza, ndikumverera ngati kuti ndimasungunuka chifukwa ndinali wamanyazi kwambiri.
Ndikuwona tsopano — zonse zomwe zinali zachichepere. Ndi achichepere kukhala otanganidwa kwambiri ndi kumasulidwa kwa chiwerewere. Pambuyo pake, malingaliro onse amasanduka nthunzi, ndipo ngati simukukonda munthu amene muli naye, mumazindikira msanga m'maso mwawo, chifukwa fumbi la mngelo lomwe linakonkhedwa ponseponse ndi mamiliyoni a zaka zosinthika likupita… .POOF… ndipo mukuyang'ana moyo weniweni, womwe siwowoneka bwino nthawi zonse komanso wosangalatsa.
Kwa inu achichepere okwapula, "fumbi la angelo" ndi mankhwala, ndipo ndikuganiza kuti ndibwino kuganiza zodzutsa ngati mankhwala. Chifukwa imasokoneza zenizeni. Ndipo ife oyambiranso tonse tinayamba kuzolowera. Ndipo kenako kuzolowera. Ndipo zina mwazinthu zofunikira mthupi zidasokonekera, ndichifukwa chake tonse tili pano tikucheza patsamba lino.
Koma mfundo ndiyakuti, ndimamva ngati milingo yanga ndi madzulo kwanthawi yoyamba m'moyo wanga, ndipo ubale wanga ndi chikhalidwe changa chogonana ukusintha kukhala bwinoko. “Hei, kugonana sikunayenera kumeza umunthu wanga wonse! Ndi gawo chabe la moyo! ”
Osadandaula, horndogs. Makina amabweranso ngakhale mutakhala a pansy ngati ine. Masiku ano, nthawi zina ndimayenera kukhala mgalimoto kwa mphindi kapena ziwiri ndikafika kwinakwake chifukwa, ndili wokonzeka kuchita kanthu. Zinthu zamtunduwu sizinachitike kwanthawi yayitali. Zinthu zina zimachitikanso, koma sindilemba zonsezi, chifukwa sichofunikira kwambiri padziko lapansi.
Khalani pamenepo ndipo mukafika kumeneko. Khalani atcheru za izi. Ndikukhulupirira kuti mupezanso ndalama zatsopano, chifukwa mudzakhala olimba, komanso omasuka ndi inu nokha, ndikudziyang'anira nokha, ndipo, amuna, izi ndizabwino kwambiri.
[Tsiku 71] Ndakhala ndikukumana ndi kusintha kovomerezeka pamalingaliro, malingaliro, bata, ndikayambiranso.
by peteypete
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