Moni kwa a Fapstronauts, uthengawu ndi wa aliyense amene akudutsa mu HOCD. Ndikufuna kukudziwitsani kuti mutha kumenya, chifukwa ndidatero. Ndakhala ndikupezeka pano pafupifupi chaka chimodzi ndipo pamapeto pake ndidakhumudwitsa. Izi zikhala zazitali, koma ndikudziwa kuti aliyense amene akufufuza mayankho atenga nthawi kuti aziwerenga ... kenako ndikuzisiya. Ndifika kwa izo, posachedwa.
Choyamba, maziko pang'ono pa ine. Sindikudziwa ngati ndinayesedwapo kapena chiyani, koma ndinali ndi mbolo yamnyamata wina mkamwa mwanga ndili ndi zaka 4 komanso mosemphanitsa. Ndimakumbukira ndikuganiza kuti zinali zoyipa kuyika mkamwa mwanga ndipo sindinaganizirepo mpaka ndikafika pagulu lachiwerewere. Chibwenzi changa chinali "chochita zachiwerewere" kotero amalankhula za kugonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ndipo mchimwene wake nayenso anali gay. Nkhani yayitali ndidakwiya chifukwa ndimaganiza, "chabwino, tsopano ndiyenera kudzitchinjiriza ku mbali zonse ziwiri za mafunde." Pambuyo pake ndidazindikira kuti adayesapo za akazi ndipo tsiku lina, ubongo wanga udayamba kupita patsogolo. Ndinayamba kuganiza, "bwanji ngati ndili ndi amuna okhaokha ndipo sindimadziwa?" Monga ndikudziwa ambiri a inu omwe muli ndi HOCD muli nawo. Ndinkangokhala ndikukula nthawi zonse pamoyo wanga wonse ndipo ndidayamba PMO ndili ndi zaka 12. Ndasiya zolaula kwa maola 6 + mpaka pomwe sindinakhalepo. Zolaula zomaliza zomwe zidandipangitsa kuganiza kuti, "OMG NDIKHALA NDI GAY," zinali zolaula za Ulamuliro Wachikazi pomwe munthu wina anali kuzipeza ndi zingwe. Kenako ndimaganiza, ngati ndili gay, ndikhozanso kuyang'ana zolaula, zomwe zidalephera chifukwa sizinadzutse. Kenako ndinapita ku zolaula zolaula zomwe zimandipangitsa kuti ndikhale… panthawiyo. (Ndipita ku izi) Ndinasokonezeka. Zitha kukhala ngati mwana wowongoka koma zidaponyera HOCD yanga kuchitapo kanthu. Ndinasokonezeka tbh.
Pakadali pano ndiyenera kufotokoza china chake. Ndinali ndikumva izi, kukhumudwa, nkhawa, OCD, komanso ubale wovuta. Munthawi imeneyi ndimakumana ndimdima wa anthu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha nthawi zambiri. Sindikupita mwatsatanetsatane chifukwa sindikudziwa omwe akuwona komiti iyi. Tiye tingonena, kuti zinayamba kundipangitsa kuti ndizisangalala ndi amuna kapena akazi anzanga, zomwe sindinakhalepo. Sindinkafuna ngakhale kukhala ogonana amuna okhaokha, ndinangokhala choncho chifukwa cha zomwe ndinakumana nazo. Kotero ine ndinapita kukaonana ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo yemwe anali wamkazi. Ndidamufotokozera ndipo adandiyankha yankho lomwe ndimayembekezera, "suli ndi mantha ndi kugonana kwako." Ndiroleni ndikuuzeni anyamata china, palibe munthu wowongoka kapena wachiwerewere, amene ayenera kuwona zachiwerewere pamaso pawo ndikukhala ozizira bwino, sizabwino kwa anthu ena. Nyengo. Ndinasiya kumuwona ndipo ndinazindikira kuti ndiyenera kuzilingalira ndekha. Umenewu unali mwezi wa March chaka chino.
Ndinakhumudwa kwambiri. Ndidataya chidwi chonse ndi atsikana, ndimakhala ndi nkhawa pafupi ndi amuna. Ndimaganiza kuti ndimakonda amuna, koma ndimadziwa kuti china chake sichili bwino. Ubongo wanga umangotulutsa malingaliro achichepere kwambiri mozungulira amuna. Zinalibe kanthu kuti anali ndani, akanakhala wamkulu kwambiri padziko lonse lapansi ndipo ubongo wanga ukadachitabe izi. Ndataya ubale wanga ndi mtsikana wokongola yemwe ndinali naye pamapeto pake chifukwa ndimakhala wokwiya nthawi zonse kapena sindimatha kuyang'ana china chilichonse kupatula OCD yanga. Ndinalinso ndi mitundu ina ya OCD koma iyi inali yoyipitsitsa.
Kenako tsiku lina ndidaganiza, ndichiyani. Ndikufuna mankhwala, ndikudzipha, ndilibe chidwi ndi kalikonse, ndipo ndimamva ngati ndilibenso mphamvu. Chifukwa chake ndidatenga Celexa 20mg. Sizinathandize konse… poyamba. Ndiye tsiku lina ndinadzuka ndipo pamapeto pake ndimatha kuganiza. Potsirizira pake ndinazindikira kuti sindinakopeke ndi amuna konse, ndipo, ndinali nditakumana ndi zowawa ndili mwana ndipo ndinali nditakumana ndi zochitika m'moyo wanga wonse zokhudzana ndi amuna omwe anali oyipa. Abambo anga ondipeza adanditcha fagot chifukwa ndimakhala nyumba zanga kuti ndizicheza. Ndinkatchedwa gay ndi fagot m'moyo wanga wonse ndipo ndichifukwa choti ndimavala ma jeans owonda ndipo sindimamvera Korn kapena zoyipa. Nkhani yochitika. Atsikana ena omwe ndimawakonda amaganiza kuti ndimagonana chifukwa ndimavala bwino. "Zachidziwikire kuti munthu yemwe amadzisamalira ayenera kukhala gay, herp derp." Chifukwa chake ndidatuluka. Pamene ubongo unayamba kuthamanga ndi ine nthawi zonse. Ngati ndingapange chibwenzi changa, zimatha kuganiza, "Ah amuna nali lingaliro la munthu wamkulu, akufuna kuyamwa tambala?, Mmm watentha kwambiri." Zinthu zonse zomwe ndikudziwa ndizabodza. M'malo mwake ndizoseketsa.
Kotero ine ndinapeza YBOP ndipo ndinayamba kuwerenga chifukwa cha kusimidwa, ndinapeza Neurotic Planet, ndipo ndinawerenga maphunziro onse okhudza kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ndikuloleni ndikuuzeni kena kake. SIZITHANDIZA. SEKANI. Mumangopititsa patsogolo nkhawa yanu mwanjira imeneyi. Pali kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa nkhawa ndi zokopa. Sindinakhalepo ndi atolankhani a Liberal (Mutha kupenga ngati mukufuna koma ingomverani) chifukwa ndikawerenga zinthu zokhudza kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, aliyense amangoti, "Ndani amasamala munthu, ingoyesani kuti muwone ngati mumazikonda. kugonana ndi sipekitiramu. etc. ” Ndiloleni ndikuuzeni zinazake, sizowona choncho. Ndiloleni ndifotokoze, pitani mukauze mwamuna wina WABWINO kuti azigonana ndi akazi. Yankho lawo lidzakhala lotani? Ayi. Chifukwa chiyani? Chifukwa amakonda amuna. Pitani mukauze munthu aliyense wowongoka kuti agone ndi abambo. Yankho lawo lidzakhala ayi chifukwa amakonda akazi. Chimodzimodzi ndi akazi. Komabe pali zachiwerewere. Amakonda kugonana ndi onse awiri. Zilibe kanthu kochita ndi anthu. Sosaiti sinakakamize aliyense kuchita zinthu mwanjira inayake, zomwe zimandibweretsa ku mfundo yotsatira. Wothandizira wanga watsopano anandiuza izi. Palibe amene angakukakamizeni kuti mukhulupirire chilichonse. Italowa, ndinazindikira kuti, sindine gay, ngakhale anthu atayesera kundiuza kuti ndine ndani, kapena ndikukana, kapena ndimakhala ndi lingaliro loti ndiyenera kukhala, ndakhala wolunjika nthawi zonse, ndinali Nthawi zonse ndimakopeka ndi mawonekedwe achikazi, ndimakonda umunthu wa mkazi, ndipo ndifa ndikonda izi. Zofanana ndi za munthu yemwe amagonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Ngati zili choncho, gulu kwa ine limanena kuti mupite ndikukhala ndi aliyense amene mukufuna, mnyamata kapena mtsikana, ndikungoyang'ana. Ndiroleni ndikuuzeni kena kake. OSA. Ndimakhala mowolowa manja kwambiri ndipo ndimangochita chilichonse chomwe ndikufuna ndi njira yamoyo, koma kwa munthu yemwe ali ndi HOCD kuti azikakhala ndi ma dudes sikungakuthandizeni, mwina mumakonda ndipo mudzakumana ndi mavuto azakugonana. Sindikunama, ubongo wanga udatsala pang'ono kupita kumeneko, koma ndimadziwa nthawi zonse pansi pomwe sindinamvepo choncho. OCD ndi chiwanda chamalingaliro, koma chitha kugonjetsedwa. Ndimaliza izi ndikulemba njira zothandizirana ndi inu omwe akhudzidwa ndi izi.
- Ngati mwayang'ana zolaula za Shemale / zolaula / zolaula zivomerezeni. Izi zikuwoneka ngati zovuta kundidalira, koma mukadzatero, ndizosavuta kuwona ngati mumakondadi kapena ayi. Mwinamwake munali ndi chidwi? Kapena adachitiridwa nkhanza ndi anyamata kapena atsikana, kapena mungokhala ndi malingaliro otseguka ndipo mukufuna kuti mufufuze, koma muyenera kuvomereza zomwe mwachita, ngakhale zitakhala zosemphana ndi inu nokha.
- Palibe munthu, osati katswiri wa zamaganizo, osati bwenzi, osati webusaitiyi, angakuuzeni yemwe inu muli. Izi ndi zofunika kuti mumvetse bwino. Ubongo wanu umapangitsa zinthu kuti zikuwopsyezeni, kukuyesani kuti musachite chilichonse m'moyo wanu. Dziwani kuti izi ndizo nkhawa osati kuganiza moona
- MUSAMAMVELE munthu amene akunena kuti muyenera kupita kukayesa zinthu zogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Izi zitha kukhala zotsutsana koma sindisamala. Ngati mwakhala mukuwongola moyo wanu wonse, mudzakhala owongoka nthawi zonse, palibe chifukwa chodutsira zovuta. Zingokulepheretsani, komanso chimodzimodzi ndi anthu omwe ndi achiwerewere, omwe akufuna kuyesa kuwongoka. Mutha kudana ndi anzanu ndipo si za munthu amene ali wowongoka kapena wogonana.
- Lekani kufunafuna mayankho pa intaneti. Kodi izi zikutanthauza chiyani? Osapita kuma foramu, osayang'ana HOCD, osafunsa aliyense amene amagonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena wowongoka. Siyani izo zokha. Mumangowonjezera izi mwa kufunafuna mayankho. Khulupirirani ine, ndinkachita mantha kuti ndisintha kwamuyaya. Ndinali wamantha kuti, "OMG IYENDA KUKHALA GAY." Ndiye tsiku lina, ndinasiya kupereka. Ndinasiya kuwerenga, ndinasiya kuganizira za izi ndikuganiza, zokopa zanga kwa akazi zidabweranso kwathunthu ndipo ndidakwanitsa kuzindikira izi. Zomwe zimandibweretsa kumapeto.
- Nkhawa ndi nyama. Ikhoza, komabe imawongoleredwa. Zidzakupangitsani kukhulupirira zinthu zomwe sizili zoona, koma muyenera kuzindikira kuti zonsezi zimakhudzidwa ndi inu. Inu ndi amene mumayambitsa. Zinthu zitha kukupangitsani kutuluka kwambiri koma ndiye kuti mukuwongolera. Ndiloleni ndingokuyankhulani monga chonchi, kudana ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kwatha, kubwerera momwe ndimaganizira, inde, pali opotoza pagulu lililonse la anthu, sizitanthauza kuti aliyense ndi wopotoza. Ndimakopeka kwambiri ndi akazi ndipo ndakhalapo. Tsopano chatsalira ndi chiyani? Zolaula zanga. Ichi ndiye chinthu chomaliza chatsalira. Malangizo anga kwa aliyense amene achita izi, siyani zolaula. Zimathandiza, osakhulupirira zomwe akatswiri ena akunena zakugonana, dzikhulupirireni. Izi zikuyitanitsa olamulira mulimonse zomwe zimachitika NJIRA nthawi zambiri pa reddit. Khalani kutali ndi reddit nanunso. Dzipatseni mwayi woganiza ndikuchira. Ndizotheka anyamata. Palibe amene angandiuze kuti ndinali gay pakadali pano chifukwa ndimaseka bulu wanga. Ngati zili choncho, izi zidandipangitsa kukhala wamphamvu kwambiri kuposa kale. Dziwani kuti OCD ndi matenda ena okhudzana ndi nkhawa amathandizadi kuposa china chilichonse.
TL: DR - Ndidagonjetsa HOCD, ndimamvetsetsa zambiri zamatenda okhudzana ndi nkhawa, palibe amene angakuuzeni kuti ndinu ndani kapena kuti mudzakhale ndani. Pali kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa nkhawa ndi zokopa. Zonsezi zidzaululira china chake chakuya kuposa zolaula zokha koma dziwani kuti ndizosatheka kuti musinthe zomwe simuli, ngakhale mutakhala kuti muli pachiwopsezo chazovuta. Ndizosavuta, ngati ndiwe wamwamuna, ndiwe wachiwerewere, ngati ulunjika, ulunjika. Tsopano ndichotsa akaunti iyi koma ndidzakhala masiku angapo kuti ndiyankhe mafunso omwe aliyense angakhale nawo. Ndikufuna kuthandiza ena, chifukwa ndikudziwa momwe izi ziliri ndipo aliyense akuyenera kuthandizidwa ngati ali ndi vuto.
by trowaway456
MAFUNSO NDI POSITI YOYAMBA:
Ndinkakonda kupita ku Google HOCD tsiku lililonse, koma zimadzetsa chisokonezo chachikulu ndikuyenera kusiya. Osayang'ana matanthauzo aliwonse okhudzana ndi kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena kukhulupirira zomwe mumawerenga zokhudzana ndi kugonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Ndinachita zonse zomwe simukuyenera kuchita. Pakapita nthawi, mutha kuwerenga nkhani zomwe zikubwera ndikuzindikira kuti simunali inu. Simunafikebe komabe. Muli komwe ndidakhala miyezi 6 yapitayo kapena apo. Inde, zimatenga nthawi yayitali kuti muthetse, sindingakunamizeni. Kumbukirani chinthu chimodzi, sikungakane! ICHI chinali chinthu chovuta kwambiri kuti ndimvetse. Ngati mumakonda atsikana, mwakhala ndi atsikana, ndipo mumangoganiza za atsikana. Zikhala choncho nthawi zonse. Tsopano ndichifukwa chake OCD ALI WOCHITA. Ndinu ubongo uli pamalo odabwitsa ndipo zizindikilo zanu sizikuwombera moyenera. Muyenera kuvomereza kuti mutha kukhala amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Izi zikumveka ngati zamisala, ndikudziwa, koma ayi. Mukadikirira kuti muchitepo kanthu kena za izo zimafika poipiraipira. Ndikhulupirireni. Nyamula bukulo ndikufotokozera wodwalayo zomwe zikuchitika. Akakuwuzani kuti mwina ndinu gay, dzifunseni ngati ndizo zomwe mukufuna. Ngati sichoncho, pezani wothandizira yemwe amadziwa za OCD. Komanso musapeze wothandizira yemwe amakulimbikitsani nthawi zonse. Izi sizothandizanso. Komwe ndili pano, sikunapite 100% koma ndiyabwino kwambiri. Ndikhoza kuganizira kwambiri za moyo.
COMMENT:
olembedwa bwino - Ndine wachiwerewere (chabwino, 80/20 gay / bi) ndipo ndimayamikira malingaliro anu ndi chowonadi chomwe mumalemba. Khalani okayikira pazomwe wina akuwuzani za yemwe inu muli - mutengere zomwe zili zoyenera - malingaliro a wina - osati zowona!
Zikomo bambo, ndikuyamikira izi. Zimatanthauza zambiri zomwe mukumvetsetsa. Chinthucho ndi anthu omwe alibe mavuto ngati awa sangapeze. Ndikungofuna kuthandiza ena omwe ali m'mavuto omwewo mwanjira yomwe ndikuganiza. Ndibwino kuti mumve bwino pakhungu lanu ndipo ndikumvanso ngati inenso. Tsiku lina anthu akadzasiya kusamala zakugonana, titha kuyang'ana kwambiri pazinthu zofunika. Ndimamva kupusa chifukwa choganizira kwambiri za icho koma ndiwo chikhalidwe cha chilombocho. OCD ndi wopusa kwenikweni.
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