Ndinayamba zolaula ndili ndi zaka 18. Panthawiyo zinali zolaula zolaula. Ngakhale pamenepo nditangoyamba zolaula ndikuchita maliseche sindimatha kusumika nthawi yanga yakusukulu. Izi zisanachitike, aphunzitsiwo adazindikira kuti kuthekera kwanga kuyang'anira kwambiri. Ndidasiya chidwi sukulu ndipo theka ndidakwanitsa chaka chotsiriza. Zachidziwikire kuti sindinapeze magiredi okwanira kuti ndikalowe maphunziro omwe ndimafuna koma ndidakwanitsa kulowa chisankho chachiwiri. Chifukwa chokha chomwe ndidasankhira chisankho chachiwiri chinali chakuti ndidachita chaka chimodzi chomaliza chaka chatha ndisanachite zolaula. Zachidziwikire kuti sindinakhalitse ku yunivesite. Mavuto omwewo adachitika monga kale. Kunali kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula komwe kunandilepheretsa.
Chifukwa chake ndidakwanitsa kuthana ndi vuto langalo nditasiya kuyunivesite. Zaka ziwiri zotsatira ndi pang'ono zinali zabwino kwambiri. Cholinga changa chinali chachikulu (mwina nthawi zambiri). Kukhala ndi atsikana kumawoneka kuti kovuta. Ndataya chimunthu chambiri. Ndinaganiza zobwerera ku yunivesite kuti ndikachite maphunziro ena. Chifukwa cha kupsinjika ndinapitanso ku zolaula. Nthawiyi zinali zolaula zolaula. Ndatulutsanso.
Chifukwa chake ndinayesa kusiya. Ndinayang'ana pa intaneti za momwe ndingapewere zolaula ndipo ndinapeza nofap.com. Zomwe ndakwanitsa kwambiri popanda zolaula zinali masabata a 2. Mapeto ake ndidasiya pamalopo pomwe anali kupanga makampu obwezeretsanso omwe mumayenera kuwalipirira ndalama. China chake chimangomva cholakwika ndi izi. Mwa zochuluka ndimatha kukhala pafupifupi masiku a 3 popanda zolaula (sabata ngati ndimagona kuntchito) pazaka zotsatira za 4. Ndinali nditasiya. Ndinaganiza kuti kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula sikungatheke.
Moyo wanga unali zinyalala. Anthu amsinkhu wanga anali kukwatira ndipo anali ndi ntchito zabwino ngakhale zokwanira kugula nyumba yawoyawo. Ndinali wonenepa, waulesi, wokwiya msanga osatha kuyang'anitsitsa kopitilira sekondi, ndinalibe libido ndipo atsikana amawoneka onyansa ndi ine. Ndine wamanyazi mwachilengedwe koma ndinali wamanyazi komanso wosakhazikika pagulu kuposa kale. Magonedwe anga anali owopsa chifukwa ndimakhala ndikugona zolaula usiku wonse.
Chifukwa chake ndidataya mtima mpaka nditapeza kanema uyu ndi Black Pigeon Speaks. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKcxOqvty3c. Pomwe amalankhula za momwe porn imawonongera kufuna kwanu ndikuchepetsa zofuna zanu zimandigwira kwambiri. Ndinadabwa kwambiri ndi ndemanga. Anthu ambiri amaganiza kuti zolaula zilibe vuto ndipo adatuluka ndizifukwa zosiyanasiyana. Pambuyo pazolakwika zonse zolaula zomwe adandichitira ndidadziwa kuti zidadzaza. Nthawi yomweyo ndinayang'ana ku Google momwe ndingapewere zolaula. Kenako ndidakumana ndi yourbrainonporn.com. Kanemayo https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series adasinthiratu chilichonse. Ndinamvetsetsa za sayansi ya zomwe zolaula zimapangitsa bongo wanga. Ndikupangira aliyense amene angakane zolaula kuti aziwonerera vidiyoyi.
Kotero tsopano momwe ndinafikira masiku 90 opanda PMO. Chifukwa chake kanema wa Black Pigeon asanakwanitse kuyamba kugona nthawi zonse nthawi ya 10:30 pm usiku uliwonse. Pambuyo pake ndimakhala mpaka 4: 00 ndimafufuza pa intaneti ndikuwonera zolaula. Ndinkamva kutopa kwambiri tsiku lililonse. Ndimadana nazo kwambiri koma ndimavutika kuti ndiyambenso kugona bwino. Kugona mochedwa kunayambitsa zolaula. Pambuyo pake ndinatha kuyambiranso chizolowezi chabwino chogona koma zinali zovuta poyamba. Usiku woyamba ndinali nditagona pabedi ndikuyang'ana kudenga mpaka 4:00 am. Ndinayesedwa kuti ndigwiritse ntchito intaneti koma sindinatengeke. Ngakhale patatha sabata limodzi ndinatha kugona mwachangu kwambiri.
Pambuyo pake ndisanaganize zosiya zolaula ndidasintha zakudya zanga (wopanda zakudya zonenepetsa, Palibe nkhumba, Palibe tirigu, Palibe mkaka ndi tchizi, Chipatso chokha chomwe ndimadya ndi malalanje) ndikuyamba kuchita zolemera katatu pasabata. Ndinkayesetsanso kukwera njinga yanga usiku uliwonse. Ndataya 30 kg mpaka pano zomwe zili zabwino.
Chifukwa chake zinthu izi zinali kukonzekera kusiya zolaula. Pa nthawi yomwe ndinali nditataya mtima ndipo sindinachite nawo poyambira kuti ndisiye zolaula.
Pambuyo pa kanema wa yourbrainonporn.com ndinayesa kuwerenga zinthu zambiri ndikuwonera makanema ochuluka momwe ndingathere pa sayansi ya zolaula (osati zonse mwakamodzi. Pang'ono pang'ono tsiku ndi tsiku) patsamba lino. Kenako ndidayamba kuyambiranso ndikuwerenga magazini ena osokoneza bongo komanso maupangiri. Ndinadzipangira ndekha kauntala. Ndikuganiza kuti chinthu china chomwe chikadathandizapo ndikuti inali nthawi yotanganidwa kwambiri pantchito kotero nthawi yayitali kwambiri ndimagwira masiku 7 pasabata makamaka mpaka usiku. Ngakhale nthawi yomweyo nditatha ntchito ndimayang'ana zolaula kotero mwina mwina sikunali kupitilira kwaulere.
Ndinaphunzira kuti kudziwa zolaula kumandithandizadi. Ndikulingalira kuti zimakulimbikitsani chifukwa chomwe muyenera kusiya. Chachiwiri kuchokera m'magazini omwe ndidawerenga ndidaphunzira kuti zolaula zitha kukugwirani nthawi iliyonse. Anthu amatha kulemba za momwe zonse zikuyendera bwino komanso momwe akupezera zosavuta ndiye mosadziwika tsiku lotsatira abwereranso. Nditakhala ndimasabata a 2 opanda zolaula kalekale ndinkaona kuti ndili nacho m'thumba koma chilimbikitso sichinatulukire ndipo ndinabwereranso. Ndikudziwa kuti anthu abwereranso atakhala masiku 90 opanda PMO. Chifukwa chake ndikudziwa kuti ndilibe m'thumba. China chomwe ndidaphunzira ndichoti ndigwirizane ndi kuwerenga zolaula pa yourbrainonporn.com ndikupita kuma foramuwa kuti muyambitsenso dziko. M'mawa uliwonse tsiku lililonse ndimapita kumawebusayiti awiriwa. Ndimakonda kukhala kwa theka la ola. Ndikuganiza kuti ndibwino kupitiriza kudziwa ndikukumbutsidwa zomwe mukutsutsana nazo.
Ndinali ndikulimbikitsidwa panthawiyi koma iwo sanali opondereza monga kale. Nthawi zambiri ndimangopita kukakwera njinga kapena kuchita zolemera zina kenako nkumapita.
Ndine wokondwa chifukwa zaka 4 zapitazo sindikadaganizira zofika pano. Tithokoze aliyense amene adandithandizira paulendo wanga wamasiku 90 ndipo ndikuyembekeza kuti ndidzakhala wopanda zolaula. Tithokze Black Pigeon pondikumbutsa chifukwa chake zolaula zimawononga moyo wanga. Tithokoze a Gary Wilson, Gabe Deem ndi Noah Church chifukwa cha makanema awo odabwitsa komanso zolemba zomwe zandithandiza kwambiri. Thokozani Gabe Deem kachiwiri pamsonkhano waukuluwu.
Ndikudziwa kuti anthu abwereranso pambuyo pa masiku 90 awo. Chifukwa chake cholinga changa chotsatira ndi masiku 112. Ndiye ndikudabwa kuti ndiyenerabe kukhala ndi kauntala yanga zitatha izi?
LINK - Ndapita masiku 90 opanda PMO (Hard mode)
NDI - Wamkulu H
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