Ndinali ndisanazindikire kuchuluka kwa zolaula zomwe zidatenga moyo wanga mpaka nditayamba ulendowu. Zinasokoneza ndikusokoneza maubale ambiri. Poyamba ndinali munthu yemwe amadziwa aliyense komanso maphwando. Nditakula ndikukula msanga, ndidayamba kudzitchinjiriza ndi anthu. Ndinayamba kuyambiranso ntchito. Ndinaleka kukhala munthu amene amadziwa aliyense.
Zaka zingapo zidadutsa ndipo ndidadzipeza ndimalumikizana ndi anzanga awiri okha komanso bwenzi langa lapamtima. Ngakhale ndili ndi chibwenzi, ndimakhala ndikulandila m'mawa ngati chinali chikho cha joe komanso scone, zinali momwe ine anali kuyamba tsiku langa. Zingwe zanga za tsiku ndi tsiku mwachidziwikire zidapangitsa kuti ndisamagonane pang'ono, zomwe, pambuyo pake zidadzetsa mwayi wosakwatiwa. Komabe sindinasamale, ndinali ndi zolaula ndipo ndinali kupita ku mzinda watsopano kuti ndikayambe moyo watsopano ndekha.
Kusowa kwabwino kwambiri mumzinda watsopano kunakulitsanso koma ndinayamba kufufuza ndikupanga anzanga. M'kupita kwatsopano kunatha ndipo ndinayambanso kukhala ndekha. Sizinayambe kundigunda kuti ndinali ndi vuto mpaka nditachita opaleshoni ya hernia ndipo ndinangotha masiku 9 osayiyika. Kenako, ndidakumana / r / nofap tsiku lina ndikuyamba kulilingalira. Miyezi ingapo idadutsa ndipo ndidaganiza zopereka. Uku kunali kuyamba kovuta kwamilungu iwiri ya milungu chifukwa sindinali wodzipereka. Sindingathe kudzichotsera zolaula zomwe ndakhala ndikudziunjikira zaka zambiri. Tsiku lina ngakhale, nditayambiranso, ndidangodwala, ndikudwala chifukwa chosagwira ntchito komanso ndiribe abwenzi. Sindinachite chilichonse ndi masiku anga chifukwa cha izi. Ndinapita kukafunafuna ndikuwononga zolaula zilizonse zomwe ndinali nazo, ndikuzichotsa. Zinali ngati kuti katundu wolemera wachotsedwa paphewa panga. Mwadzidzidzi, ndinadziwa kuti ndingatonthoze wina aliyense pogwiritsa ntchito kompyuta yanga popanda kuda nkhawa kuti apeza zolaula zanga. zoyipa zoyera, chinali kumverera kodabwitsa.
Ndi kuwala kwanga kwatsopano komwe ndidapanga kunali masiku 57, osakhala ovuta. Chifukwa chodalira kumene, ndimakhala ndikupita kokakumana ndi atsikana atsopano nthawi zonse, ndinali ndi anzanga atsopano angapo nawonso. Koma, sindinali wosagonjetseka, tsiku lina ndidayenda ndikubwerera m'mbuyo… ndikubwereranso, ndikuyambiranso, ndikuyambiranso. Sindingakwanitse kupitirira sabata chifukwa kumapeto kwa sabata iliyonse ndimatha kunena kuti "Chabwino, ndi sabata limodzi lokha, ndimatha kuchita sabata lina". Choyipa chachikulu. Zomveka. Nthawi zonse. Ngakhale ndimakhala ndikubwereranso, ndinali ndikadali panjira yodzipangira kukhala munthu wabwino. Kukhala ndi chidwi chodzipanga bwino ndikudula P ndi M zidandithandiza kukhala ndi chidwi chodzipangitsa kukhala wabwino m'malo ena a moyo wanga. Ndinapeza ntchito ndipo ndinayamba kukumana ndi anthu atsopano ndipo ndimakhala wolimba kwambiri pamzera. Mwadzidzidzi ndinalibe nthawi yobwereranso, ndinali kugwira ntchito ndikumacheza ndi anzanga omwe ndapeza. Inde, pali nthawi zina zomwe zidadutsa malingaliro anga, koma sizinali zoyenera. Ngati sindinachite bwino kunapangitsa moyo wanga kukhala chonchi, bwanji ndikufuna kubwerera?
zomwe zimandibweretsa ku masiku ano, masiku 90! Wakhala gehena wapaulendo wokhala ndi zokwera ndi zotsika zambiri. Koma zonse zinali zabwino. nditayamba ulendowu, ndinali wotsutsana ndi anthu ndipo ndinali ndi abwenzi ochepa, ndimakhala masiku ambiri ndikulankhula ndi anthu ena. Tsopano? Ndili ndi ntchito yomwe ndimakonda ndipo ndimagulugufe ochezera, ndikukumana ndi anthu atsopano tsiku lililonse. Chidaliro changa mwina ndipamwamba kwambiri kuposa kale lonse. Inde, moyo wanga umakhalabe ndi zovuta komanso zotsika monga zachilendo, koma sinditembenukiranso kwa PMO ndikakhumudwa. Ndimadzizungulira ndi anthu abwino kapena ndimachita zabwino. Sindinganene kuti "ndachiritsidwa", chifukwa ndikadali ndi zolimbikitsa, koma ndikupita njira yoyenera, ndipo ndizofunika. Tsopano ndikakhala ndikulimbikitsidwa si "Damn, ndiyenera kuthira rocket mthumba". Ndipafupifupi, "Damn, ndiyenera kutuluka sabata ino kuti ndikakumane ndi wina". Ngati mwafika pa gawoli, zikomo powerenga ndipo ndikhulupirira kuti zingakuthandizeninso paulendo wanu. Komanso, pepani kuti ndi phokoso pang'ono, ndimangokhala ngati ndatulutsa ziganizo ndikuyembekeza kuti ndizomveka ndikamapita.
LINK - Masiku a 90 a mode hard adanditengera pang'ono miyezi ya 9 kuti ndikwaniritse.
by Zachinsinsi
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