Uwu ndi uthenga womwe ndimalota kuti ndipange kuyambira pomwe ndidayamba paulendo wanga wa nofap. Zakhala zovuta, zovuta kwambiri ndipo chakhala chimodzi mwazovuta kwambiri m'moyo wanga. Uwu ukhala utali wautali choncho ndikupemphani nonse kuti mukhale oleza mtima pamene mukuwerenga .. ndikhulupirireni ziyenera kukhala zofunikira.
Choyamba ndiloleni ndifotokoze za ine ndekha komanso momwe ndinalili munthu panthawi yanga ya PMO ... Ndinakumana ndi zolaula ndili ndi zaka 12 ndipo kuyambira nthawi zonse ndakhala ndikukumbukira .. 1-2 nthawi patsiku. Pakadali pano mpaka ndili pafupi ndi 18 sindikukhulupirira kuti ndimakonda zolaula, monga mwina ndikadatha masiku ochepa osapezekanso .. Ndinali ndi sukulu yabwino kwambiri .. Ndinali wophunzira kwambiri .. Ndinali wosewera mpira wabwino ndipo ndakhalanso mkulu woyang'anira sukulu .. kotero kunena zowona sindinakhalepo ndi unyamata wovunda. Koma sindinakhalepo ndi bwenzi nthawi iliyonse ino. Kuti ndikudziwitseni, ndine mnyamata wokongola (lol) monga momwe ndauzidwira ndi akazi ambiri pofika pano ..
Chimodzi mwazinthu zofunikira zomwe ndikufuna kutchula ngakhale chinali chizolowezi changa cha facebook. Ndimakhulupiriradi kuti zoulutsira mawu zidasokoneza moyo wanga m'njira zambiri. Ndinkakonda kuthera maola 4-5 + tsiku lililonse ndikuwononga nthawi yanga pa izo. Chifukwa chake ndikukulimbikitsani nonse kuti musiye zoulutsira mawu kuti mupindule kwambiri. Chifukwa chake ndipitilira pomwe ndidayamba kupeza zovuta za PMO.
Ndinkakonda mtsikana ndili ndi zaka 19 .. aka kanali koyamba kuti ndikondane kwambiri. Koma monga momwe mungaganizire, monga munthu wina aliyense yemwe amachita PMO sindinakhalepo ndi chidaliro chomupeza, koma ndinalimba mtima kuti ndimuuze zakukhosi kwanga ndipo mukuwona kuti ndinali bwenzi. Ndimamukonda kwambiri ndipo izi zidakhudza kwambiri moyo wanga. Ndidataya chiyembekezo mwa ine .. ndidayamba kukhumudwa kwambiri. Ndinayamba kumwa mowa kwambiri kuti ndithawe njira monga PMO ndipo ndipamene ndinayamba kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula kwambiri. Ndinayamba kukhala m'modzi mwa anyamata omwe amangokonda kukhala kunyumba, ndikusaka pa Facebook tsiku lonse, kusewera ndikusewera masewera apakanema. Ubongo womwe umalimbikitsidwa nthawi zonse ndi dopamine ndipo ndidayamba kukhala wotayika kwathunthu. Izi zidapitilira kwakanthawi .. atleast kwa zaka zina zitatu. Pambuyo pake ndimalowetsedwa kusukulu ya med (kudzera pampando woyenera, zonsezi pomwe maphunziro anga sanakhudzidwepo, ndimatha kukhala ndikulemba mabuku bwino).
Ndimadutsa chaka choyamba choyipa, pafupifupi kulumikizana ndi atsikana zomwe zimandipangitsa kukhala wokonda kwambiri kubala zipatso ... Izi zikupitilira mpaka semester yanga ya 4 pomwe tsiku limodzi labwino ndidakumana ndi mutu wokongola wa reddit wotchedwa nofap. Ndikukuuzani chifukwa chake ndinayambitsa izi. Sindinayambitse izi kuti ndikhale ndi moyo wabwino kapena china chilichonse .. chifukwa changa chachikulu choyambira ichi chinali chakuti patsiku lomwe ndimayesetsa kuthana ndi Jack ndimangoganiza momwe zingakhalire ngati d wanga ali munyini m'malo mwake za dzanja langa. Kodi ndikadatha kupitabe? Ndinayamba kukhala ndi mantha nazo .. Ndinayamba kuda nkhawa ndipo ndimayesa njira zosiyanasiyana kuti ndingosunthira d wanga m'malo moyendetsa dzanja langa kuti ndidziwe zomwe sindingathe. Izi zinandiopsa kwambiri. Ndinazindikira kuti ndafika poti ndikufunika kuti ndikule kwambiri ndipo ndimafunikira zolaula kuti ndizisangalala nazo ndipo ndipamene ndimayamba kusaka pa Google za izi ndikupeza izi.
Chabwino .. siziyambira apa. Linali tsiku lokongola la Meyi 18 2017 ndimazindikira za nofap. Ndipo ndiyamba… Ndikumva kudabwitsa tsiku lina popanda kufalikira. Ndikumva kuti ndatsitsimutsidwa komanso ndili bwino koma ngati wina aliyense amene amapita ndi kuyesa kwake koyamba ndalephera. Ndimangopita masiku 4 okha. Ndipo izi zikupitilira… Moyo wanga ukuyamba kuipiraipira chifukwa chakulakalaka kwambiri pa nofap komanso chifukwa chomwe ndimabwererabe nthawi zonse ndipo ndimadzimva kuti ndikulephera komanso kuyipira chifukwa sindingathe kumaliza. Kenako pambuyo pake ndimachotsa zanga zonse .. pa 21st Seputembala 2017 .. Zonsezi pomwe nthawi yanga yayitali kwambiri mwina inali masiku 18… ndidapitilizabe kulephera ndipo zimandipweteka. Zotsalira zomwe ndili ndi kulumikizana kwa atsikana zero ngakhale pano. Pambuyo pake chaka ndimakhala ndi mayeso ku yunivesite ndipo ndimayesetsa kupitiliza ulendo wanga wa nofap koma sikugwira ntchito. Sindinathe. Ndikumva chisoni .. Ndinayenera kuthana ndi nkhawa zanga pamaphunziro .. kotero ndimatha mpaka tsiku lomaliza la mayeso anga omwe anali Januware 10th 2018. Ndipo inali nthawi yomaliza yomwe ndidakhalapo. Zomwe zakhala zikuchitika kuyambira pamenepo ndiye chinthu chachikulu kwambiri chomwe chachitika kwa ine… Tsopano ku nkhani yopambana….
Ndimapanga chisankho mwamphamvu kuti ndisadzayambenso ndipo mu semester yatsopanoyi, ndikuchita zonsezi kuti ndikhale bwino ndi anthu komanso pandekha. Ndinali mnyamata wamtali kwambiri wonenepa mozungulira 60kg panthawiyo .. chifukwa chake ndidaganiza zodzilimbitsa ndikulowa nawo masewera olimbitsa thupi. Ndimayamba kulimbitsa thupi madzulo aliwonse kwambiri. Masewera olimbitsa thupi komanso chitukuko chaumwini chimakhala chizolowezi chachikulu kwa ine ndipo ndimayamba kuchulukana ndikung'ambika ndipo anthu amayamba kundiyamikira .. (kotero izi mwachilengedwe zimakulitsa kudzidalira kwako ndipo umadzimva wowoneka bwino pagulu). Pa Feb, panali mpikisano wampikisano waku mpira waku yunivesite. Monga ndimakuwuziranitu kuti ndimasewera osewerera koma zaka ziwiri zapitazi sindinali ndekha ndipo sindinathe kuwonetsa luso langa. Ndidayitanitsa uwu ngati mwayi wodziwonetsera ndekha komanso wow .. ngati chithumwa chomwe ndimachita bwino. Ndipo ndimazindikira kwambiri..ndipo kwa nthawi yoyamba kuchokera kwa atsikana. 😉
Ndipamene zimayambira .. kumapeto kwa mwezi wamawa ndimayamba kutenga nawo mbali pazochitika zaku koleji (kwa nthawi yoyamba m'moyo wanga) ndimasewera ndi kuvina. (Sindinayambe ndavina moyo wanga wonse lol) ndipo zimafika pokhala zangwiro ndipo tsikulo lidasintha moyo wanga .. Ndinali tsiku la 59 pomwe izi zidachitika. Atsikana anali ponse pa ine m'bale .. monga ZONSE ZONSE. Ndinadziwa kuti atsikana ambiri anali kundiphwanya .. amafuna kundifunsa .. amafuna kudziwa ngati sindili wosakwatiwa komanso zonse zomwe mukudziwa. Ndimamva ngati nyenyezi yovuta.
Ndipo ndine nyenyezi yovuta ku koleji tsopano. Kuchokera kwa woluza yemwe palibe amene adamudziwa nyenyezi yeniyeni. Apa ndipamene chinthu chabwino kwambiri chimachitika .. Ndimalumikizana ndi chidziwitso cha msungwana yemwe wabwera ndikusintha moyo wanga ndipo kwa nthawi yoyamba ndipo ndimalumikizana kwambiri ndi mtsikana.
Chifukwa chake kuti tiwerenge mwachidule .. kuchokera kwa bambo wowonda ndidamangidwa. Kuchokera ku nkhaŵa zambiri za anthu ndinakhala wotsimikiza kwambiri kuti ndikuyenera kuvina pa siteji ndi swag (lol). Kuchokera kwa bambo yemwe sanazindikire kuthekera kwake konse, tsopano ndikudziwa momwe ndilili komanso zomwe ndingachite m'moyo wanga. NDILI ZONSE ZOFUNIKA KUKHALA ZABWINO TSOPANO ndipo ndikufuna kukudziwitsani kuti palibe chilichonse m'moyo chosatheka. Zonse zimatengera mphindi kuti mupange chisankho chotsimikiza kuti musiye kukula ndikusunga zomwezo.
Ndikulimbikitsanso ndikuchotsani mafayilo azolowera pafoni yanu chifukwa zimapangitsa kuti pakhale nthawi yambiri ndikuwonongerani nthawi. Ndikukhulupirira kuti kusiya zolaula kunali kofunika monga kusiya zolaula kwa ine. Ndimangokonda moyo wanga tsopano ndipo mudzatero, ngati mukhala odzipereka ndi cholinga chochita bwino. Zikomo chifukwa cha nthawi yanu 🙂
LINK - Tsiku 109 - Nkhani yanga yopambana - sindimadziwa kuti izi zichitika.
by abz_medico
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