Kotero mwezi umodzi wapitawo ndinasiya zolaula, chifukwa chake ndikulephera kugwira ntchito. Ndine wathanzi, wazaka 23, wopanda kunenepa kwambiri, ndimachita masewera olimbitsa thupi pafupipafupi, sindimamwa mankhwala aliwonse, koma pafupifupi chaka chapitacho ndidayamba kupanga zovuta kuti ndikhale ndi nthawi yocheza ndi akazi. Ndinayamba kuchita mantha chifukwa vuto lomwe ndimaganiza kuti nkhawa zina zimangowoneka kuti zikuchulukirachulukira. Ndinazindikira pafupifupi miyezi isanu ndi itatu yapitayo ndinasiya kukhala pagulu, zomwe sindinakhalepo ndisanathe msinkhu, ndipamene ndinazindikira kuti pali china chake cholakwika ndi ubongo wanga. Ndimatha kukhalabe wolimba ndikamaonera zolaula, ndipo ndimakhala ndi matabwa m'mawa uliwonse, koma popanda zolaula, ndimangoganiza, zinali zovuta kuti ndikwaniritse, ndipo ndimakhala ndi akazi pakamwa pakadali pano (osapatula, mudalingalira, mukuganiza zolaula zomwe ndimaziwona).
Ndinkadziwa kuti vuto linali chiyani, ndimayang'ana zolaula kwambiri, ndimakhala wambiri kangapo patsiku komanso ndimalo anga ena (monga azimayi enieni komanso malingaliro anga) osandidzutsa mokwanira kuti andisangalatsenso , Ndinali kuwonjezera kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula, motero kukulitsa nkhaniyi. Ndinadziwa kuti ndiyenera kusiya, ndinayesa kwa miyezi itatu ndikulephera kangapo, koma kubwereranso kwanga kunali kutalikirana, ndipo ndipamene ndinazindikira kuti ndikuyamba kuyambiranso pagulu, ndikuti ndikhoza mosavuta ndimalimbikira kwambiri ndikugwiritsa ntchito malingaliro anga, kuti ndidaganiza kuti ndiyenera kudzipereka pazabwino izi, ndipo sindinayang'ane zolaula pafupifupi masiku 35. Ndikudziwitsani kuti ndikadali kanayi pa 4 pa sabata (osatinso kamodzi patsiku), uku ndi kusiyana kwakukulu poyerekeza ndi china chake ngati 14 / sabata monga kale. Ndinaganiza kuti ndikadula pang'ono ndikubwereranso ku zolaula chifukwa chosowa chochita, nthawi iliyonse ndikakhala ndi chidwi chowonera zolaula zomwe ndimaganizira, zidandithandizira kuthana ndi izi. Mwina nofap ndichinthu chamtsogolo, koma ndili wokondwa kuti Johnson wanga tsopano wagwiranso ntchito.
Chibwenzi changa chidakondwera pomwe membala wanga adayambiranso kugwira ntchito, ndidamuwuza kuti a ED anali chifukwa chakuti ndinali wopanikizika kuntchito ndipo mwina ndinali wokhumudwa kwambiri (moona mtima ED iyomwe imandipangitsa kukhumudwa), amadziwa kuti ndimayang'ana zolaula koma osati kangapo patsiku Tsiku lililonse, moona mtima ndichomvetsa manyazi kuti ndimamunyalanyaza kwa miyezi ingapo chifukwa ndimatha kuwonera china chake "chotentha" pa intaneti, ndipo ndimamulipira kwambiri chifukwa chokhala wosalimbana ndi ine pomwe dotolo wanga sagwira ntchito (palibe chilango chofunira). Timagonana pafupipafupi, ndipo sabata iliyonse zikuwoneka kuti libido yanga yawonjezeka, panali cholumikizira pafupifupi sabata limodzi ndi theka kapena apo pomwe dick wanga anali wopanda chidwi koma atadutsa ndimamva ngati ubongo wanga "wachira" mwanjira ina, zinali zolondola ndisanayambe kuyambiranso pagulu ndikuyamba kuwona kupita patsogolo kwakukulu. Ndine wokondwa kuti sizinapitirire miyezi iwiri (kapena kupitilira) monga anthu ena akuwonekera, biology ya aliyense ndi psychology ndiyosiyana mosiyana ndi kutalika kwa ma flatline. Ndikuganiza kuti ndi chinthu chokhumudwitsa kwambiri pankhani yosiya zolaula, koma moona mtima ngati mukuwerenga izi ndikukhalabe ndi zolaula, kutsetsereka kwanu kumatha kukhala kochepa kapena mwina simungapeze, simukudziwa mpaka mutayesa, choncho don osataya mtima.
Ndikungofuna kuthokoza kudera lino komanso kwa aliyense pa intaneti pothandiza anthu onga ine kudzera mu izi, ndikufunanso kunena kuti ndingonyalanyaza anthu omwe akuyesa kukukhumudwitsani, chifukwa samamvetsetsa ndipo akungoyesera kuti azikhululukire zolaula zawo, pamapeto pake palibe chilichonse "chabwinobwino" kapena "chachilengedwe" chokhudza zolaula zamasiku ano ndipo simukukhala "wachilendo" pakuchotsa m'moyo wanu.
LINK - Nkhani Yopambana Ya (Oyamba) Wogwiritsa Ntchito Zolaula
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