LINKT TO THREAD -Nice Guy Symdrome. Nkhani yofunika kwambiri kwa ophatikiza / owerenga zolaula.
Tsopano ndikuwerenga buku lonena za Nice Guy Symdrome. Wolemba adatchula zambiri za "Nice Guys" zomwe ndikufuna kugawana nanu. Poyamba ndinali "Nice Guy" isanafike vuto langa la NoFap - ndikusintha tsopano. Ndikuganiza kuti anyamata mudzadzizindikiritsa nokha ndi zambiri mwazomwezi. Mfundo imodzi yomwe wolemba sakudziwa: "Nice Guy Syndrom" ndi YONSE yokhudzana ndi kubzala. Ndikuthokoza Mulungu ndi NoFap pondipulumutsa. Nazi:
Anyamata okongola ndi opereka. Atsikana okongola amanena kawirikawiri kuti zimawapangitsa kukhala omasuka kupereka ena. Amuna awa amakhulupilira kuti wowolowa manja ndi chizindikiro cha momwe iwo alili abwino ndipo amachititsa anthu ena kuwakonda ndi kuwasangalatsa iwo.
Anyamata okongola amakonza ndi kusamalira. Ngati munthu ali ndi vuto, ali ndi chosowa, ali wokwiya, wopanikizika kapena wowawa, Anyamata okongola nthawi zambiri amayesa kuthetsa kapena kuthetsa vutoli (kawirikawiri popanda kufunsidwa).
Anyamata okongola amafuna chisomo kuchokera kwa ena. Chikhalidwe chonse cha Nice Guy Syndrome ndikufunafuna kutsimikizika kuchokera kwa ena. Chilichonse chomwe Nice Guy amachita kapena kunena pamlingo wina wake chimawerengedwa kuti avomereze wina kapena kupewa kuvomereza. Izi ndi zoona makamaka mu ubale wawo ndi akazi.
Anyamata okoma amapewa mkangano. Anyamata okongola amafuna kuti dziko lawo likhale losalala. Pochita izi, amapewa kuchita zinthu zomwe zingagwedeze ngalawayo kapena kukwiyitsa aliyense.
Anyamata okongola amakhulupirira kuti ayenera kubisala zolakwa zawo. Amunawa akuopa kuti ena adzawachitira nkhanza, kuwachitira manyazi, kapena kuwasiya ngati zolakwitsa kapena kusowa kwachinyengo zikuwonekera.
Nice Guys amafuna njira "yoyenera" yochitira zinthu. Anyamata okoma amakhulupirira kuti pali chinsinsi chokhala ndi moyo wosangalala, wopanda mavuto. Iwo amakhulupirira kuti ngati iwo angakhoze kokha kupeza njira yoyenera yochitira chirichonse, palibe chomwe chiyenera kuchitika molakwika.
Anyamata okoma amadandaula maganizo awo. Anyamata okoma amakonda kufufuza osati kumverera. Iwo amakhoza kumverera ngati kusokoneza nthawi ndi mphamvu. Kawirikawiri amayesa kusunga maganizo awo ngakhale pa keel.
Atsikana okongola nthawi zambiri amayesa kukhala osiyana ndi makolo awo. Ambiri a Nice Guys akusimba kukhala osapezeka, osachokapo, osasamala, okwiya, achiwerewere, kapena abambo oledzeretsa. Si zachilendo kuti amuna awa apange chisankho pa nthawi ina mmiyoyo yawo kuti ayese kukhala madigiri a 180 osiyana ndi Adadi.
Atsikana okongola amakhala omasuka kwambiri okhudzana ndi akazi kusiyana ndi amuna. Chifukwa cha mkhalidwe wawo waubwana, anyamata ambiri a Nice ali ndi abwenzi ochepa amuna. Nice Guys nthawi zambiri amafuna kuvomerezedwa ndi azimayi ndikudziwatsimikizira kuti ndi osiyana ndi amuna ena. Amakonda kukhulupirira kuti sali odzikonda, okwiya, kapena ozunza - mikhalidwe yomwe amalumikizana ndi "amuna ena".
Anyamata okongola amavutika kuti awononge zosowa zawo. Amuna awa nthawi zambiri amawona kuti ndi dyera kuyika zosowa zawo patsogolo. Amakhulupirira kuti ndichabwino kuyika zosowa za ena patsogolo pa zawo.
Kawirikawiri anyamata okongola amapangitsa wokondedwa wawo kukhala ndi maganizo awo. Ambiri a Nice Guys akunena kuti ali osangalala ngati wokondedwa wawo ali wokondwa. Chifukwa chake nthawi zambiri amaika mphamvu zawo pa ubale wawo wapamtima.
Kodi Cholakwika Ndi Kukhala Mnyamata Wabwino?
Titha kuyesedwa kuti tipewe vuto la Nice Guy Syndrome. Pambuyo pake, kukhala okoma kungakhale bwanji choipa chotere? Tikhozanso kunyansidwa ndi makhalidwe a Marvin Milquetoast a amuna awa monga momwe amachitira ndi zojambulajambula ndi malo otulutsa TV. Popeza anthu akuyimira zovuta pa chikhalidwe chathu, kujambula kwa mnyamata wovuta kungakhale chinthu chosangalatsa m'malo modandaula.
Nice Guys nawonso nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi nthawi yovuta kumvetsetsa kuzama kwa zikhulupiriro zawo ndi machitidwe awo. Ndikayamba kugwira ntchito ndi amuna osangalatsa awa, pafupifupi osasankha, onse amafunsa, "Cholakwika ndi chiyani kukhala Nice Guy?" Mutatenga bukuli ndikusokoneza mutuwo, mwina mungakhale mukuganiza chimodzimodzi.
Powapatsa amunawa dzina loti Nice Guy, sindikunena za machitidwe awo enieni, koma kuzikhulupiriro zawo zazikulu za iwo komanso dziko lowazungulira. Amuna awa akhala okhulupirira kuti ngati ali "abwino," adzakondedwa, kupeza zosowa zawo, ndikukhala moyo wabwino.
Dzina lakuti Nice Guy kwenikweni ndi wosokoneza chifukwa anyamata a Nice nthawi zambiri amakhala abwino. Nazi makhalidwe ena Osati-So-Nice a Guys Nice:
Anyamata okongola ndi osakhulupirika. Amuna awa amabisa zolakwitsa zawo, samapewa mikangano, anene zomwe akuganiza kuti anthu akufuna kumva, ndikudandaula maganizo awo. Makhalidwe amenewa amachititsa a Nice Guys kukhala osakhulupirika. Anyamata okongola ali obisika. Chifukwa amatengeka kwambiri kufunafuna kuvomerezedwa, Nice Guys amabisa chilichonse chomwe akukhulupirira kuti chingakwiyitse aliyense. Mwambi wina wa a Nice Guy ndi wakuti, “Ngati poyamba sizikukuyenderani, bisani umboni.”
Anyamata okongola ali mkati. Anyamata okoma ali odziwa kuyanjanitsa zidzinso zotsutsana za iwo mwa kuwasiyanitsa iwo muzipinda zawo m'maganizo awo. Choncho, mwamuna wokwatiwa angathe kupanga chidziwitso chake chokhalira wokhulupirika, chomwe chimamupangitsa kukana kuti ali ndi chiyanjano ndi mlembi wake (kapena intern) chifukwa samayika mbolo yake m'mimba mwake.
Anyamata okoma ali osokoneza. Atsikana okongola amakhala ndi nthawi yovuta kupanga zofunikira zawo kukhala zofunika kwambiri ndipo amavutika kupempha zomwe akufuna mu njira zomveka bwino. Izi zimapangitsa kukhala opanda mphamvu. Chifukwa chake, nthawi zambiri amayamba kugwiritsa ntchito njira yolunjika poyesera kupeza zosowa zawo.
Anyamata okongola akulamulira. Chofunika kwambiri kwa anyamata a Nice ndikuteteza dziko lawo. Izi zimapangitsa kufunikira nthawizonse kuyesa kulamulira anthu ndi zinthu zowazungulira.
Anyamata okoma amapereka kuti atenge . Ngakhale anyamata a Nice amakonda kukhala opatsa, kupereka kwawo kawirikawiri kumakhala ndi zingwe zosadziwika komanso zosagwirizana. Amafuna kuyamikiridwa, amafuna kuti ena aziwauza, amafuna kuti wina asiye kuwakwiyira, ndi zina zotero. Atsikana okongola nthawi zambiri amanena kuti akumva wokhumudwa kapena wokwiya chifukwa cha kupereka zambiri pamene akuwoneka akupeza ndalama zochepa.
Anyamata okoma ndi osalimbikitsa. Anyamata okoma amakonda kuwonetsa kukhumudwa kwawo ndi kukwiya mwachindunji, kuzungulira, komanso osati njira zabwino. Izi zimaphatikizapo kupezeka, kusaiwala, kuchedwa, osadutsamo, osakhoza kupeza erection, kutha msanga mofulumira, ndi kubwereza makhalidwe omwe amakhumudwitsa ngakhale atalonjeza kuti sadzawachitanso.
Anyamata okongola ali odzaza ndi ukali. Ngakhale anyamata a Nice akukana kukwiya nthawi zonse, moyo wamakhumudwa komanso wokwiya umapangitsa kuti anthu ena azikwiya kwambiri. Mkwiyo umenewu umawombera nthawi zina zosayembekezereka komanso zowoneka zosayenera.
Anyamata okongola akuledzera. Chizoloŵezi chogonjetsa chimathandiza kuthetsa nkhawa, kusinthasintha maganizo, kapena kupweteka mankhwala. Kuyambira pamene anyamata a Nice amakhala otetezeka kwambiri mkati, ayenera kutuluka kwinakwake. Chimodzi mwa makhalidwe omwe amadziwika kwambiri kwa anyamata a Nice ndi kugonana.
Anyamata okongola ali ndi vuto lokhazikitsa malire. Ambiri a Nice Guy amavutika kunena kuti "ayi," "siyani," kapena "ndipita." Nthawi zambiri amadzimva ngati osowa chochita ndipo amawona kuti winayo ndiye amene amachititsa mavuto omwe akukumana nawo.
Anyamata okongola nthawi zambiri amakhala okhaokha. Ngakhale anyamata okongola akufuna kuti azikondedwa ndi kukondedwa, makhalidwe awo amachititsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuti anthu aziwayandikira kwambiri.
Atsikana okongola nthawi zambiri amakopeka ndi anthu komanso zinthu zomwe zimafunikira kukonzekera. Khalidwe ili nthawi zambiri limakhala chifukwa cha makulidwe aubwana wa Nice Guy, kufunikira kwake kuwoneka bwino, kapena kufuna kwake kuvomerezedwa. Tsoka ilo, izi zimapangitsa kuti Nice Guys azigwiritsa ntchito nthawi yawo yambiri kuzimitsa moto ndikuwongolera zovuta.
Atsikana okongola nthawi zambiri amakumana ndi maubwenzi apamtima. Ngakhale a Nice Guys nthawi zambiri amalimbikitsa kwambiri gawo ili la miyoyo yawo, ubale wawo wapamtima nthawi zambiri umakhala wovuta komanso wokhumudwitsa. Mwachitsanzo: l Nice Guys nthawi zambiri amakhala omvera owopsa chifukwa ali otanganidwa kwambiri kuyesa kudziwa momwe angadzitetezere kapena kukonza vuto la mnzake. l Chifukwa choopa kukangana, nthawi zambiri amakhala achinyengo ndipo sapezeka kwenikweni kuti athetse mavuto. l Si zachilendo kuti a Nice Guys apange maubwenzi ndi anzawo omwe amakhulupirira kuti ndi "mapulojekiti" kapena "diamondi pamalo ovuta." Ntchitozi zikapanda kuphulika monga momwe amayembekezera, Nice Guys amakonda kuimba mlandu wokondedwa wawo chifukwa chokhala pachisangalalo chawo.
Anyamata okongola ali ndi vuto ndi kugonana. Ngakhale anyamata ambiri a Nice amakana kuti ali ndi zovuta zogonana, sindiyenerabe kukumana ndi wina yemwe sakhutitsidwa ndi moyo wake wogonana, amakhala ndi vuto logonana (sangapeze kapena kukhala ndi erection, amafika pachimake mwachangu kwambiri), kapena adachitapo zachiwerewere (kudzera muzochitika, uhule, zolaula, kuseweretsa maliseche, ndi zina zambiri).
Anyamata okongola nthawi zambiri amakhala opambana. Ambiri mwa anyamata a Nice omwe ndakumanapo nawo anali ndi luso, anzeru, komanso ochita bwino pang'ono. Pafupifupi popanda kusiyanitsa, amalephera kuchita zomwe angathe. ”
Ndikungofuna kugawana nawo maganizo, ndikumasuka ku Maketani: Ndinaphunzitsidwa kukhala WOLUZA. Bambo anga ndi amayi anga anandiphunzitsa kuti ndiLECHITIKA. Iwo ndi a m'banja langa onse ankanditsutsa nthawi zonse, nthawi zonse ankandisiya. NDINADZIWA ZONSE. Ndimaphunzira kuyunivesite yabwino kwambiri mdziko langa. Ndidawerenga mabuku ambiri ndipo ndine munthu wotukuka kwambiri. Ndayamba kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi chaka chino, ndili ndi masewera othamanga tsopano. Ndimalankhula zinenero zinayi. Ndinathetsa mantha anga ambiri. Ndidadzipangira dzina langa, umunthu wanga. Ngakhale china chake chinali kusowa: Icho chinali kukula. Ndinali wosuta ndipo zinali zikuwonongabe moyo wanga. Koma tsopano ndigonjetsanso izi, ndili kale pa tsiku la 77 ndipo sindidzapanganso. Monga ndidanenera NDINADZIWA ZONSE Zomwe ndinganene ndikuti: Ndine munthu watsopano tsopano ndipo ndi chiyambi chabe.
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