Since I was about 13 years old I PMO’d. It started off with pics of beautiful women and slowly progressed to videos. I never thought anything bad of it because I was told it was healthy to jerk off and nothing was wrong with porn. On top of that literally all my friends watched porn and anyone that was asked in school would say they watched it too.
I PMO’d anywhere from 3-10 times every week since the age of 14. I am now 20 years old, never kissed a girl, and never thought addiction to porn was a thing. I have lots of mental illnesses that I am certain it was worsened from PMO.
I found NoFap when playing a League of Legends game (was someone’s club tag). I decided to read some of the posts and holy shit did it hit me hard. I had a panic attack and became very frustrated from my ignorance. I was someone if you told me you didn’t PMO I thought you were weird or were lying. A lot of parts in my life started to make sense now that I knew I had this addiction. I was so pathetic and I finally realized that now.
Some things I am not so proud of:
I would always try to make time in my day to PMO
Wouldn’t go to social events cause I couldn’t PMO
Hated going on trips because it made it harder to PMO
Constantly anxious about my search history even when it was incognito
Very possessive about my computer and phone (search history/pictures)
Didn’t feel the need to have/want a girlfriend
Was watching very strange porn
Could not keep it up without porn
I even stooped so low that I bought 3 fleshlights :/
Now to where I started to improve my life. So as I said, I found NoFap 100 days ago, and since then I have not PMO’d 1 time (tips for how I did this at the end). The first 3 weeks were pretty difficult as I constantly had an urge to PMO and I constantly would have sperm come out after I pissed (wtf, still occasional). I did notice a big improvement in my social abilities. I had a much easier time talking to people that normally would spike my anxiety. Also my depression became less severe and for the first time in years I started to really want to have a girlfriend. I began to read again and have finished 8 books, doing cold showers everyday, wim hof method, and working out some. Pretty much NoFap has accelerated my recovery time tenfold (was trying to get mentally healthier for the past 2 years). I still have a lot to work on but this has given me more confidence to attempt improvement. One thing that has happened a lot to me is having dreams that I PMO’d and waking up sweating and disappointed in myself until I realize it didn’t happen.
People on here that get 3 day streaks or around that time period and say you can’t do it, you are right,l it’s because you don’t want to. I was ADDICTED to PMO and my first try I am at 100 days and still going strong. You are the only one who is going to change your life, no one else should have to lend you a hand. If you give it your all you will be able to stop the cycle and it only gets easier. To those who are struggling keep trying and those who have made it don’t be an enabler like so many on this sub are.
Things I did to quit PMO -When I started NoFap I stayed away from negative relapse stories because you want to read inspirational and motivating posts to help me out. -Deleted every bit of porn from all my devices. -Cold showers/working out. -Reading/video games when wanting to PMO. -Having a very solidified goal, mine is the next time I cum it’s with a girl that I love and I don’t care if it’s 5 years from now. People on here saying that the goal of NoFap shouldn’t be to have sex, but if it motivates you enough to stop PMOing use that to your advantage. -Don’t tell most of your friends unless you trust them. They will probably make fun of you. -Make sure to not let others opinions change what you want to do. NOFAP WORKS OKAY, stop reading these stupid posts about people saying it’s BS. -Threw out fleshlights. It was a temptation I didn’t need to have. -Filled in my time with other things so I wasn’t thinking about NoFap.
Good luck to everyone on the sub. You have changed my life for the better.