Relapse rebound - I project confidence & warmth, relationships vastly improved
I have been a fapstronaut for a year now but deleted my old account. Several months ago I started fapping regularly again, but am now two months in to my new streak. I feel as though I have made large-scale changes to my state of mind. I regularly feel awesome.
Here are some things I learned.
Who I am when I fap regularly I sleep in. I suck at getting out of bed. I am awkward. I fear interactions. You can see fear in my eyes. My state of mind is defeat. I crave attention and validation. Looking at porn is more rewarding to me than real social interaction, because it is cheap and totally accessible with no risk. But there is a price to pay, and the price is that you act like a fucking lame person instead of the awesome person that you are.
Who I am after just two months of NoFap/no sex I am energized. I feel awesome. I endure pain. I throw myself at my hobbies and goals. I much more aware of my behavior and my thoughts. Music sounds better. When I go out I dance like I own the place. People love it, and they become energized themselves because of your confidence. I find girls flocking around me because I project confidence and warmth, and yet I seek no attention. Nature is awesome. My computer broke about two months ago and I haven't fixed it, because now I actually live my life instead of staring at a screen. When I look at a girl, I think "that girl is gorgeous" instead of "I want to fuck her". Funny shit just pops out of my mouth instead of just saying boring shit. Women notice you appreciating their beauty and personality instead of just seeing your thinly veiled fear and lust. And they LOVE that.
My relationships with men and women are vastly improved. I love "guy time" so much more. I love talking with women. I don't really care if they are a "10" or a "5", I will treat them all the same. I interact from a position of great personal wealth. I have so much more of my personality to offer people and I love to give it.
This sounds like a lot, and the discerning reader is probably skeptical. But here's the reason why this has worked for me. The reality is that You get "superpowers" by being awesome, and NoFap is just a part of being awesome.
Each person knows deep down how to be awesome, but they are too lazy to start doing that shit. Here's what I do to be awesome.
I run hard five days a week. Honestly this is just as effective or more than NoFap in bringing confidence. When I run I give it my all. I run five miles at a time now. Often when I am about to reach the end of my run I just say "fuck it," turn on something like "Till' I Collapse" or "Lose Yourself" by Eminem. Shit gets suddenly real and I run another three miles. The music syncs with me, everything makes sense, and all therAt the end of a hard ass run there is about an eight hour window where you just feel like a boss. You just did something that is hard as fuck, you had to give it your all, and now you get to bask in the glory. If you want this feeling, then get off your ass and run until you are swamped with sweat.
I meditate daily Just do it. 15-30 minutes a day. Just direct your mind to the sensation of your breath. Study what happens. Examine feelings. View thoughts and let them go. This is a critical practice if you want to learn more about yourself and increase your awareness.
- Take risks Tell the girl at the sandwich shop that her hat is totally cool. No, not to get in her pants or get any attention from her, just because her hat looks cool.
- Walk up to a group of people at a party, and just talk to them. Be friendly and smile. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy them.
- Go out on the dance floor and go wild. Even by yourself. Who cares.
- Go learn a song on guitar or piano and play it for people.
- Get off your computer!
- Love everything unconditionally. Even that obnoxious kid you can't stand.
This is what it takes to change your life, people.
Edit: And a final note. For those who are doing NoFap for better erections or better sex. It happens when you are confident. So do this stuff.