I’m 24 and probably started the combination of pmo at about 13. Since maybe the age of 19 that routine would last an hour and would be done daily.
I came to know of this community through Gary Wilson’s tedx talk while browsing for ted videos on youtube but didn’t really do anything with the information other than thinking it was quite interesting and keeping a note of it in the back of my head. So on to my nofap journey: towards the end of 2014 my application to grad school was accepted, even now I don’t know how I got in. I’m by no means smart and perhaps the person doing the admissions failed to see on the transcript that I was required to hand in showed that I had to take one of the classes three times before passing, or maybe the school was just after money. I realised I would have to get my head straight coming into this thing and that’s why I started nofap, which was around November 2014. When I began I only gave half-harted attempts, holding out for a week or two here and there before binge-relapsing, because really, lets be honest porn is just so good (read on I’m not trolling).
I last fapped on March 5 2015, and last glimpse of porn was about a week later. Some people report really enjoying the first few weeks, but let me tell you it was pure hell. I experienced withdrawal symptoms like sudden and intense cold and aching feelings running from the neck, through the arms to the wrists, and I felt as though I couldn’t think straight, like the feeling of a fading hangover but for almost two weeks. I really only began to notice benefits a month and a half in, but the withdrawal convinced me this addiction was real and I kept reminding myself “the fact that you’re feeling like shit is tangible evidence that your brain is rewiring”.
The stuff we all like to hear: nofap helped me shrug off much of the anxiety I experienced, so bad was it that a lecturer referred me to the school counsellor. But now the only indication I get which makes me realise I’m staring at girls is that I find them staring back; previously I would never look at girls, or anyone, I would just wait to get home then fap it out (would you believe I’ve never had a girlfriend or had sex?). Now, I see a cute/hot girl/woman walking in the opposite direction to me and without even thinking about it maintain eye-contact all the way until she’s right next to me, It startled me the first few times this occurred and I would have to stop where I’m standing for a minute and think about what just happened. I feels pretty good now but I know pre-nofap me would dwell and obsess over something like this for days, not at all healthy.
What other good things have happened? With traffic becoming more of a pain in the arse and the train route I take filled with weirdos at the hours I commute, I decided to get a motorcycle licence and a cheap motorcycle so I could get to the library to study, where if anyone’s being an obnoxious knob it would just take a casual look in their direction for them to stop and sometimes get up and leave (come on, kinda funny right?). Such was the power of nofap! lol. I spent about the first five weeks of the semester waking up from a fap induced hazy slumber so not much study or effort was put in there, I threw everything I had at making sure I didn’t fall back into old habits (you can probably see where I’m going with this).
After a face-to-face assessment task where a practitioner looked me in the eye and said I have to do better (without being mean or anything), I fell ill for a week but that was because the day before some arsehole had sneezed on me (it’s winter here). Not completely getting over the cold but remembering what I was told, I jumped into my first cold shower, that was a month ago and it’s been cold showers every day, 2-3 times a day since. I had come across this in the posts of some nofappers who said it helped their mindset or something along those lines. I would definitely agree. You know when you accidentally look at a really tough guy, I don’t mean a gym fool but guys who seem like they’ve gone through tough experiences, and you immediately falter and look away and pretend like it didn’t happen? Not that I intentionally seek out such people and try to stare at them, but after cold showers combined with nofap I will not falter and even get respect like a slight nod. Also, due to the cold showers I dropped a pants size without any exercise besides walking the dog and a few push-ups in the bathroom before jumping in the shower. I before nofap I would run approximately eight km three to four times a week.
Nu se face niciodata mai usor, lupta este in cel mai scurt timp. Chiar dacă am avut o zi aglomerată, am întâlnit cu familia sau cu prietenii de la liceu, indiferent cât de mulți kilometri am rulat, nevoia de a viziona porno este întotdeauna prezentă. Am trecut peste 90, iar acum zilele 120 sunt scopul. Am incercat o mare parte din sfaturile oferite de nofap, inclusiv adoptarea unei diete vegane; logica este o dietă sănătoasă, cu mai puține produse de origine animală, scade libidoul sau orice altceva. Ea avea efectul opus complet pentru mine, m-am simțit de două ori excitat și m-aș simți nevoia să-i împrăștie; M-am simțit și mai frustrat și am vrut să mișcăm tot timpul. Presupunerea mea se datorează faptului că mi-am condiționat mintea de a împerechea sexualitatea cu PMO, aceasta fiind singura modalitate de ao exprima. Apoi, în mod inconștient, am început să văd ce părea că ar fi privit concursurile cu fiecare fetiță în vizor, fără să-și verifice biții și să le obiecteze, dar cu ochii în ochi.
Și acum am nevoie de sprijinul tău. Nu sunt sigur dacă am făcut destul pentru a răsturna prin primul semestru al uni. Dacă nu, crezi că școala mă va lovi? Munca pe care am făcut-o a fost acceptabilă, dar a fost întârziată. Acest lucru a devenit foarte important pentru mine. Ca pe cineva care a luat întotdeauna calea cea mai mică rezistență, nu mi-a păsat prea mult nimic și am fost întotdeauna ocupat fiind o prăjitură încăpățânată. Nu m-am aplicat niciodată așa cum am avut la sfârșitul semestrului. Având tot conținutul pentru a acoperi cu adevărat m-au făcut bine și m-au păstrat luptând spre ceva. Nu eram neapărat fericit, dar pentru prima dată în viața mea simțeam că am un scop. Chiar dacă trebuia să reiau toate clasele, nu m-aș simți descurajată, ci pentru că am văzut prietenii pe care i-am făcut un pas departe de mine (așa că am făcut prieteni, ceva ce nu făcusem în timpul burlacilor mei), cu plăcere sari inapoi inapoi.
tl; dr: Prin nofap am văzut persoana pe care vreau să o fac. M-am lovit într-o cameră greșită, doar din colțul ochiului mi-am văzut lucrurile de care aveam nevoie, dar acum mi-e teamă să fi dat afară înainte să-l prind. da, dușurile reci sunt destul de bune.