April 1st, 2013 – day zero of my journey, at the time, I was sitting there casually fapping to porn, as per usual, along with browsing the internet aimlessly. However, the internet held some dissonance that would find me; a certain TED talk by Gary Wilson, The Great Porn Experiment. Being deeply tied to pornography, my interest was naturally piqued by the notion of some grand porn experiment, despite promptly realizing that it was absolutely not what I was expecting I continued watching.
In hindsight I barely understood anything this person was saying, but in an ironic twist my blind pursuit of novelty turned against itself under the pretense of a new experience with seemingly unbelievable results – enter NoFap.
Now at this stage in my life I was in an utter shithole of an existence, and just for the sake abbreviation, I’ll bulletpoint it, here’s a small background from years of daily fapping.
- Fapped from a young age – No memory of when exacly
- Memory & cognition was below average
- Hardly remember whole years of my life
- Although undiagnosed, I now realize I was deeply depressed
- Musuā
- Had crippling social anxiety
- Barely ate food, what I did eat was generally crap
- Trained for Cross Country & Track six days a week – totally underrecovered
- Had no appreciable energy all the time
- Was completely unemotional and irritable
- Testosterone was low/ Estrogen was creeping up – low muscle tone, neurological changes, etc.
The struggle was at times too great, I would succumb, feel like shit, and that was that, however despite this I could never throw this out – it only kept getting better as time went on, the reward was too great, and that was something I couldn’t ignore.
Eventually I started to pay attention to my diet, adopting vegetarianism and veganism with appreciable increases in energy, and now being out of caloric restriction my cognition has improved with the Bulletproof diet ma o nisi Nootropics to top it off.
In brief I’ll go back to the ‘ole bulletpoints to top off the successes, improvements and so forth that have come from harcore mode NoFap (This is just what comes to mind)…
- Faateleina le malosi
- Better attention span
- Less impulsive
- E leai se fofo o le faiʻai lava
- More sociable and fluid with social interactions, massive faʻaitiitia in social anxiety
- Significantly improved memory
- More emotionally in tune (self & others) & greater emotional stability
- Lelei leo maso
- Much happier – depression is entirely cured
- Faʻateleina le toʻa
- Greater intimacy with girlfriend
- Stronger pelvic floor muscle
- Awakening of malosi kundalini
This has been an absolutely transformative experience for me, nothing that I have to resist – no urges, I haven’t even thought about my counter or about porn at all for weeks. It’s difficult for me to fully grasp how far gone I was; much of my memories about those awful times are very suppressed as of now as I shift my focus to improving my life truly – by mindfulness, by living for now.
The future that lies before you is greater than the chains that bind you, break yourself free, and walk freely into paradise.
Observations from the other side
by joxeu
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