"Uphuma Njengeziyobisi Ezingamanyala" (IAtlantic)

Ngaphambili kule nyanga the Atlantic Ndacacile indlela ndiza ngayo ukuba ndibonise ukunyakaza kwezilonda ze-porn, ukuba ngaba ndingaqinisekanga ukuba ndihlala ngaphantsi kwesi sambulela. Ilebula yandenza ndakhululekile ukufikelela kumaqela angamaqabane kwaye ekugqibeleni ndifuna unyango endicinga ukuba ndiyadingayo.

Ngokukhawuleza, yazala iiyure zokuzama ukufumanisa ukuba: Bangaphi abanye abantu ababukela iphonografi njengam? Ngelixa kungekho phononongo lweziyobisi ezingamanyala, kukho indlela yobomi evelayo yepesenti ethile yabemi ebhijelwe yi-Intanethi.

Umyinge weminyaka engumntwana wase-US kuqala waboniswa kwi-pornography I-11 ngokwemiSebenzi yoKhuseleko lwezeMpilo, nangona kunjalo abanye bathi lisondele kwi-14. Ngoku ka Intsapho yaseNorton, ze-3.5 ukusesha kwiwebhu kwi-2009 ngabantwana, Igama lesithandathu elalisoloko lisetshwa “yayingu-porn.” Kwabantwana abangaphantsi kweesibhozo, bekuyikota yesine efunwa ngokuqhelekileyo.

Ngokucacileyo, abaninzi abanjengaye baqala ukubukela ii-porn xa bengabonakali, kwaye baphandi bathi ukuba kukho unxibelelwano phakathi kokusetyenziswa gwenxa kwe-porn kunye neengxaki zokunyanzelwa ngokwesini ezantsi kwendlela.

Ngokwe-2009 uphando lwabafundi beekholeji ze-30,000, ngaphezu kwe-10 ekhulwini labafundi besilisa base-US baqikelelwa ukuba babasebenzisi abanobugqwetha obunzima (iiyure ezintlanu ukuya kwezingama-20 ngeveki), kunye neepesenti ezingama-62 zabafundi beekholeji ababukela iphonografi kwi-Intanethi veki nganye. KwiYunivesithi yaseBrigham Young kwi2007, iipesenti ezingama-21 zabafundi beekholeji abangamadoda baxele ukubukela iphonografi “yonke imihla okanye phantse yonke imihla.”

Njengabantu abadala, iingxaki zinokuqhubeka. Kwi-2003 American Academy ye-Matrimonial Lawyers nganiso, i-sibini yesithathu yabameli bachaza ukuba ukusetyenziswa kwe-intanethi ngokunyanisekileyo kwendima ebalulekileyo ekuqhawuleni umtshato kulo nyaka, kwaye Ipesenti ze-56 zala matyala omtshato kwakuquka iqabane elinesithakazelo esikhulu kwiiwebhusayithi zoononopopasho. Kwiminyaka eyisibhozo ngaphambili, iifoto zoonografi zazingadlala nendima ekuqhawuleni umtshato.

Kwaye njengelizwe, sibukela uninzi lwe-porn- Abantu abayi-40 bavakashela isayithi lezonyango ubuncinane kanye ngenyanga (malunga nomnye kwabaseMelika abasibhozo). Kwaye njengendawo ye-Intanethi, iipesenti ezingama-25 zezicelo zethu zeinjini yokukhangela kunye neepesenti ezimangalisayo ezingama-35 zokukhutshelwa zethu zezamanyala.

Nangona ezinye iiphando eziye zaphinda zihlolisise abantu ngokubanzi zigqiba ukuba I-intanethi ye-intanethi ayinayo ingxaki, kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba ipesenti ye-intanethi "imilutha" iphezulu kakhulu kubantu abasemngciphekweni: abancinci, amadoda axhunyiwe kwi-Intanethi. (75 kwi-85 ipesenti abasebenzisi be-intanethi abasebenzisa i-intanethi ngabantu).

Kwaye ngelixa umlutha we-intanethi ungakhange uhlolwe ngokukodwa, olunye uphando lubika oko Umlutha we-intanethi ngokubanzi uphakamileyo njengama-23 ekhulwini kwezinye iikholeji zabantu abadala, kunye noonografi kubonwa ngathi kakhulu umlutha ukuvuselela i-intanethi.

Ndandibukela nje iiyure ezimbalwa zoononophala ngeveki kwaye andizange ndibukele iphonografi kwiminyaka, kodwa iyaqhubeka ichaphazela kakubi ubomi bam-ke kwabanye, umda awukho phezulu ngaphambi kokuba i-intanethi ibangele iingxaki. Sele kubonakala ngathi ubuncinci banokuba lishumi ukuya kumashumi amabini eepesenti abantu abakwikholeji abaneminyaka yobudala abahlupheka ngenxa yemicimbi enxulumene ne-Intanethi, kwaye abantwana abaninzi bebukele kwiminyaka emincinci njengoko isantya esiphezulu se-Intanethi sifikeleleka ngakumbi, luya kuba lukhulu kangakanani olu luntu ixesha labantwana besizukulwana sam baneminyaka yobudala ekholejini?

Ngethamsanqa, lo mphakathi sele uququzelele.

Ukufumana i-intanethi ye-intanethi yoluntu IiForam zokuxoxa ngokusetyenziswa kwezilwanyana kwaye ukunyanzelisa i-masturbation kuhamba ngewebhu. Ezi ziquka I-NoFap yeReddit (apho amalungu axhasa omnye komnye ukuba "angafaki," okanye ukuphulula amalungu esini), Ubungqina bakho beBrain (apho abasebenzisi bakhicilela iincwadi zamaphephancwadi e-porn-quitting) PubMed, kunye nokubulawa kweziza ezakha umzimba (ezinxulumene kakhulu ne-Erectile Dysfunction ngokukodwa), kunye neenkundla ezithile ezijoliswe ngqo kwiinkqubo zokuzilahla iifostile ezifana Ukutya I-Wolf Wolf.

Ngaphezulu kuneenkcukacha zamanani, ukukhula ngokukhawuleza kwezi ndawo zedijithali kubonwa ngathi njengesibhengezo sokukhonkotha ukuba abantu abaninzi, ubuncinci baxelelwa, baxhatshazwa ngoononophala: i-NoFap yaqhawula ababhalisile be-60,000 ngenyanga edlulileyo.

Amanye ala maqela aqokelela ulwazi olunomdla malunga "neziyobisi ezingamanyala" kunye nokusombulula izixazululo-kusetyenziswa i-Intanethi ngokudibeneyo ukulwa into eyenziweyo kumsebenzisi ngamnye yedwa. Umzekelo, i-fdstronaut yoluntu yaseReddit iqhube ukuphonononga ngo-Apreli 2012 kunye nabangaphezu kwe-1,500, abaphi na iinkcukacha zabo, imikhwenkwezi kunye neziphumo ezizibileyo zokuzibamba i-masturbation.

Ngezantsi igrafu evela kwiphononongo echaza ukunqweneleka kwezesondo, into eyenziwa ngabaphandi abathile ibonakaliso lokulutha kwezilwanyana ze-intanethi:

Kakade ke, abantu baququzelele kwinxalenye enkulu ukuba bafumane oko kuphuculise ubomi babo bahluphekileyo kwesi sifo esaziwayo. Kule ndawo, uGary Wilson kunye noMarnia Robinson, abasunguli be Ubunjani bakho kwiSigonyo, ungenele ukudlala indima yomcebisi kunye nomlondolozi.

Ngokusekwe kuhlalutyo lwabo lophando ngeziyobisi, uWilson noRobinson bacebisa ukuba kwenziwe ulingelo: akukho pixelated ngesondo ixesha elide njengoko kuthatha "ukuqala kwakhona." Eli gama ngokukhululekileyo lithetha ukubuyela "kwesiqhelo" ukusebenza ngokwesondo kunye ne-libido ngokudodobala kweendlela ze-neural ezinxulumene nokuvuka kunye ne-porn-based stimuli. Ukusuka kwisakhelo se-neuroplasticity, bacinga ukuba ii-neurons ziyeke ukudubula kunye, ziyeke ukudibanisa kunye-ukuba singazitshintsha iingqondo zethu ukuba zikhuthazwe okanye zingafuneki kwi-Intanethi.

Le sibini ipapasha amava omsebenzisi ngenkqubo "yokuqalisa kwakhona", abathi banikele ingxelo ngesiqhelo zithatha malunga neenyanga ezimbini ukuya kwezintandathu. Kwisiza, uninzi lwabafana abancinci abane-erectile dysfunction baxela ukubuyiswa ngokukhawuleza ukuba bayayeka ukuphulula amalungu esini kunye ne-orgasm okwethutyana, ke abasebenzisi babhala uvavanyo "akukho PMO" (iphonografi, ukuphulula amalungu esini, i-orgasm).

Ubunjani bakho kwiSigonyo uyancoma le ngcebiso ngeforum yintoni omele ulindele xa uyeka ukusuka kwi-PMO-esekwe kwiiakhawunti ezivela kwiindawo ezininzi ezikwi-Intanethi- njengokulahleka okwethutyana kwe-libido kude kube "ngumgangatho ophantsi," kunye ne ixesha lokubuyisela elongezelelweyo ukuba mncinci, ngakumbi ukuba uqala ukuphulula amalungu esini usebenzisa i-Intanethi. Isalathiso sombulelo Ubunjani bakho kwiSigonyo Ucacisa ukuba olu khokelo luye lwabathintela abafundi abaninzi ukuba baphinde baphinde baphinde baxakeke.

Kum, ulwazi lwaludubulekile. Ndingu hayi okuphela kwakhe ngaphandle oyekile ukusebenzisa iphonografi kwaye akakaphili. Imeko yam is ngokuqhubekayo kuba ndiqalise ubomi bam ngokwesondo kunye noonobumba. Kwaye nam kufanele uqhubeke unamathela.

Ngaphaya koko, ekugqibeleni bendinemithombo yokuphanda ukuzama kwam "ukusilela" ukuqala ngokutsha. Esikolweni esiphakeme, xa ndiziva ngathi iminqweno yam iphonografi yayihamba ngendlela endandingayithandi ngayo, ndathatha iinyanga ezintlanu kwi-masturbation. Kodwa, ubusuku obuninzi ngaphambi kokuba ndilale, ndicinga ukuba le mibono ephefumlelweyo ye-porn njengoluhlobo lomvuzo kum. Xa ndaphinda ndaqala ukubelana ngesondo ndodwa, kwakulula ukunqanda iphonografi, kodwa ukucinga kwam kwakusaphambuka ngokukodwa kunye neengcambu ezibonakalayo kwi-porn endandibukele.

Ndithumele oku Ubungqina bakho beBrain, kwaye umntu wachaza ngokucacileyo kum: i-neurons umlilo kunye kunye, ucingo kunye, kwaye ukuba ndandingenayo loo nto, ndandisoloko ndigcina loo mivuzo ibomeleleyo. UGary Wilson Ubunjani bakho kwiSigonyo iyaqhubeka, ixelela abafundi ukuba baphephe ukukhuphela kwimiqulu yokubhala okanye yokulahla kunye nokungena kwi-intanethi okanye ii-apps-hook-up ezifana ne-Grindr okanye iTinder, kuba inkqubo yokunikezela ngokuchofoza umfanekiso emva komfanekiso ekukhangekeni kwintshukumo ingaba ngumlutha.

Nangona uncedo kakhulu, olu uphando olungacwangciswanga kunye nee-anecdotes alingekho indawo yeengcebiso zonyango. Ngoko ndaphendukela kwintlalo yesifo sengqondo ukuba ndibone ukuba ngaba nantoni na yokuthetha. Ngaba beyazi ukuba le nto yinkinga?

Iingcamango zobuchwephesha ekuphatheni umlutha wobulili Ngelishwa, kubonakala ngathi iingcamango ezazisasazekayo malunga nokuxilongwa kwezilwanyana ezingcolileyo zoononophelo kwizenzululwazi ziye zashiya oogqirha abangenakuxhotyelwa ukunyanga izigulane.

A uphando lweengcali kwi-2009 wabonisa ukuba ngaphezu kweepesenti ze-75 azive engakulungele ukuphatha ngokufanelekileyo abaxumi abavakalisa ukusetyenziswa kwezithombe zoonografi, ngelixa i-50 ipesenti zahluleka ukuchonga ukuyeka u-porn njengenjongo enkulu yonyango, kunye neepesenti ze-20 eziqhelekileyo okanye azizange zijongane nokusetyenziswa kwezilwanyana.

Ngaphandle kokunyuka kwezigulane ezifuna uncedo ngokuziphatha kakubi kunye neentlobano zesini, abaninzi abanomtshato kunye neentsapho zonyango zenza umonakalo of "umlutha we-cybersex," evumela ukuba izimvo zabo zoononophala zichaphazele ngokungafanelekanga iimvavanyo zabo. Nangona kukho amaqela enkxaso ekhethekileyo anje ngeSondo iziyobisi ogqithisileyo abaqeqeshelwe ukuxhatshazwa ngokwesini, kwiimeko ezininzi, abantu abaye bafuna uncedo kubaqeqeshi baye badikibala.

Ngethamsanqa, abanye abaphengululi babone oku kuza baza bazama ukulungiselela abo basebenzisana nabo.

Phakathi kwe-1990 yamayeza eyaziwayo emhlabeni wonke, uWendy Maltz kunye nomyeni wakhe uLarry Maltz, onomsebenzi wezentlalo unemvume ekhutshelwe ilayisenisi, waphawula ukwanda kwenani labathengi abasondelayo ngeengxaki ezinxulumene nezocwangco; Ubunono bobubomi abuzange busebenze njengesongezelelo sobudlelwane bezesondo kodwa njengamandla okukhuphisana. Baqhagamshelana nabanye abaphengululi kwaye bafumanisa ubungqina bolu hlobo, ngoko baqala ukucela izigulane ezinxulumene neentlanzi zoxilongo.

Kwi-2008, bapapasha incwadi ebhaliweyo, I-Porn Trap: Isikhokelo esibalulekileyo sokunqoba iingxaki ezibangelwa yi-Iconsography . Ngokuchasene nokuthintela ukuxilongwa kwe-imbroglio, abakwaMaltz bachitha isiqingatha sokuqala sencwadi bachaza indlela abantu abawela ngayo "kumgibe woburheletya," kubandakanya amabali athetha ngoqhawulo-mtshato, ukubanjwa kunye nehlazo. Banikezela yonke incwadi ekuphiliseni, eqala ngokuxelela omnye umntu malunga nengxaki yakho ye-porn, kwaye ushukumisele ekubhaliseni kwinkqubo yonyango, ukudala "indawo engenamanyala" ukuthintela ukubuyela umva, ukumisela ukuphendula, kwaye ekugqibeleni "ukuphilisa isini. ”

Ukususela ngoko, ezinye iikliniki ziye zathatha indlela yokuvuselela ngakumbi kwaye zenzele imodeli yokuxilonga entsha. Tal Croitoru, MSW / MBA, ubeka "umlutha wobugqwetha" kwinqanaba elifanayo ne-PTSD kwaye uye waba nguvulindlela we-EMDR (ukunyuswa kwamehlo kunye nokuhlaziywa) kunye nezigulane zakhe - ukulungisa "ukuxhatshazwa koononophelo" ngokubukela iividiyo ezibuhlungu nokuziphindaphinda - kwaye uxele iziphumo ezincumisayo. Abanye bakhuthaza uqeqesho lokuphela okanye indlela yokuziphatha kwengqondo yokuziphatha (nokuba kungoku inkqubo yekhompyutha) ukumisa "ukubuyela" kwakhona kwengqondo engamanyala kwaye ekugqibeleni ubeke endaweni efanelekileyo loo mifanekiso ngokufanelekileyo.

Okwangoku, kwabanye bethu, eyona nto iphazamisa iphonografi ngumtshato owenzayo phakathi kwethu kunye namaqabane ethu asondeleyo. Ekuqwalaseleni oku, ezinye i-psychotherapists zibonelele ngokubaliswa kweendlela eziphumelelayo ezisekwe kwizibini ezinyangiweyo.

Kwincwadi yakhe Amadoda kwi-Couch My, UGqirha Brandy Engler uchaza indlela uCasey ahlupheke ngayo "ngesazisi esaphukileyo" kubudlelwane bakhe nentombi yakhe uAmy ngenxa yokuba iingcinga zakhe eziphefumlelweyo ezingamanyala zaziziva ngathi zingcatsha kuye - ke wabazifihla. Ugqirha Engler wanceda esi sibini ukuba siyiqhawule imibutho yabo yothando kunye nefantasy yesini, ivumela uCasey ukuba aphalaze ihlazo lakhe kunye no-Amy baphonononge inkanuko.

Abanye abagxeki bezilwanyana zokuxhatshazwa kwezilonda zezilwanyana zonyango kunye ne-psychotherapy njengento ephikisanayo. URo Weiss, ingcali yezilwanyana ezixhatshazwa ngokwesini kunye nomsunguli weSizwe soKhuseleko lwezesondo, akavumelani kakhulu.

U-Weiss undicacisele ukuba unyango lweziyobisi zesiko ezinje ngokunyanga ngokuziphatha kunye nenkxaso esekwe kwiqela kunye noxanduva lokuphendula zibonakalise ngokucacileyo ukuba ziyasebenza ekupheliseni isimilo esingathandekiyo. Into acinga ukuba inyathelo lokuqala elifunekayo. “Izigulana zam ezininzi azikwazi kujonga iingxaki zobuntwana. Unyango ngamakhoboka alungiselela abantu unyango lwengqondo. ” Mhlawumbi ikhathaza ngakumbi, u-Weiss ubonile abaguli ebebekwi-psychotherapy kuphela, ngaphandle kongenelelo lokuziphatha, abaye bagxothwa okanye baqhawula umtshato ngexesha lonyango kuba bengakhange baphinde babe nemikhwa emibi.

Ukufunda konke oko kwakungenza ndiziva ndingacingi ngokwam obalaseleyo malunga nokuzikhethela kwam kink kunye nemiba yexesha elizeleyo nge-delayed ejaculation. Kufuneka abe ngumlingane wam ekunqobeni ihlazo lam, kungekhona ijaji kunye nejaji.

Ukuthetha malunga neefostile Njengoko oku kuya kujongwa ngakumbi, ngethemba abaphandi bazakufunda zonke iintlobo zonyango. Kodwa okwangoku, inye into wonke umntu avumelana ngayo-ukusuka kwi-Reddit's fapstronauts ukuya kubanyangi ngesondo- kukuba ukuthetha ngayo kuyanceda.

Kwisiqendu kaGary Wilson's "Ubunzima bakho kwiCybersex Jungle" inkqubo kanomathotholo, uWendy Maltz uxoxe ngokubaluleka kokophula ukuthula kwezobisi:

Eyona nto iphambili kukoyisa ihlazo kwaye uphume wedwa. Fumana umntu onokuthetha naye-inokuba yingcali, inokuba ngumhlobo, isenokuba sisihlobo, nokuba ngumlingane okanye iqabane. Ukuba oko kuvakalelwa ngathi kuyothusa inyathelo, buyela kancinci kwaye uzifundise malunga nephonografi yanamhlanje. Yahluke mpela kune playboy iimagazini zangaphambili. Imfundo inciphisa ihlazo. Uyaqonda ukuba awuwedwa kwaye le yinto entsha.

Nangona ukufunda malunga neziyobisi ezingamanyala kunye nokufumana uluntu ukuba luthethe ngalo kuye kwabakhulula abanye, ihlazo-eliya entliziyweni yeengcinga ezixhaphakileyo zeendima zesini kunye nokwabelana ngesondo- kugcine ukuthula. Le yenye yeempendulo endizifumene kumfundi obukele iphonografi njenge-S & M, iDiaper, kunye neFurry:

Njengendoda, ukuthetha ngalo mbandela kumhlobo wam osenyongweni kweza kuphela emva kokuba ndithathe i-MDMA kwaye andikhange ndikwazi ukukhankanya eyona nto intle yeengcinga, yi-S & M kuphela. Ihamba ngokuchasene nokuxabiseka kwendoda kunye nokulindelwa ngabafazi. Inokukhubazeka ngamanye amaxesha. Kuba ndingazi ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni andinokwazi ukunxibelelana ngako nentombi yam kwaye yasenza sahlukana.

Njengoko ndifumene iimpendulo ezinjengeli isiqalo sam sokuqala kwi-addicted pornography, kwaye njengoko ndandiqala ukwabelana ngebali lam ngokukhululekileyo nabahlobo, usapho (ewe, ndixelele abazali bam), kunye neqabane lam langoku, ndiye ndaqala ukuqonda indlela yokudibanisa engathethi ngayo-ukwahlulwa-kwaba ngamava okulutha kwi-Intanethi yamanyala sebenzisa.

Ukuza kwam okubalulekileyo "Andiyikholelwa into yokuba uyayithanda loo nto."

Njengenxalenye yenkqubo yokuvula iqabane lam libhekiselele kwi-pornography, sagqiba ekubeni sibukele i-porn kunye kunye. Wayengakaze abukele iifoto zangaphambili ngaphambi kokuba, kwaye emva kwevidiyo yokuqala, wayegweba ngokucacileyo ukuba yayiyihlazo kuye. Ngokukodwa imifanekiso yesikhwama.

Xa ndamxelela ukuba ezo zigcawu zaziyeyona nto iphambili kum, ukuba ndiza kukhawulezisa ndize kufikelela kuvuthondaba, akazange aqonde.

Ndizibukele ndinomsindo. Ndandididekile malunga nokuba buhlungu kunye nomsindo uvelaphi, kodwa ndandisazi ukuba bajolise phi - kuye. Kubafazi abanjengaye. Ndikhule ndinomsindo bendingakwazi nokuthetha.

Sasibukele umcimbi wentombazana enengulube elala nehagu kunye nommelwane wakhe omdala kunye neengcamango zentombazana ezisasaza kwintloko kunye nevidiyo: Yena ngekhe uthi amanyala ayinto elizothe. Yena ngekhe aphikisane nam. Yena ngekhe uthi hayi. Ndaphinda ndaphinda ndacaphuka kulutsha.

Ukuphakama kokubukela kwam iphonografi yayikukuba kwinqanaba lokufikisa - kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo- xa ulwalamano ngalunye luziva ngathi luluqhekeko kwibhulorho ende. Iphonografi ayikhange isebenze njengesixhobo sokukhathazeka kwam ngokwesondo; yayingumqadi omileyo ukubuyela kuwo.

Ke xa iqabane lam lalinikezela ngelithi laliwe, ubuso bam beemvakalelo babunobutshaba, unxunguphalo kunye nenkanuko. Ndibuyile. Ukuya kwixesha laxa le ntombazana okanye intombazana: ichwechwele ngobusuku besikolo ukuba iyokutshaya kunye nam kodwa bendifuna ukuhlala ndingabahlobo; ndithandane phantse unyaka kodwa ndingakulungelanga ukumkhulula ihempe; ngekhe ayeke ukundiphuza xa enxilile kodwa angaqali xa ephilile.

Ndandihlala ndiziva ndinetyala ngokubukela iphonografi kwaye bendifuna izinto endizisola ngazo. Kutheni le nto abafazi bengandinyanzeli ukuba ndiye phaya?

Umlingane wam uvale isiphequluli kwaye saba nesondo esibi kunazo zonke. Uthe ibikokokuqala ndakhe "ndambamba"

Ndiye ndaqonda ke ukuba isikweko sika "Maltz" somfuziselo besindifanele. Njengomntu oneminyaka eli-12 ubudala kunye ne-neophyte ye-Intanethi, ndaye ndangena kwi-loop efanelekileyo yokuphendula.

Iisayithi ze-Porn ziye zakhuthaza ukuziphatha kwamanyalazo kunye nezimo zengqondo ngokuphindaphindiweyo, kwaye ndabuya ngokukhawuleza ukuba ngumbono onobuhlungu obunobunono, obunobunono obunobuncwane, obunokuba bubuhlungu ngenxa yokuba kwakunjalo. Ngexesha elifanayo, ezi ziphatha zazingcikiva kwaye zatshutshiswa luluntu, ngoko ndandiziva ndingakwazi ukuthetha ngokuthanda kwam, ndiqhuba ukuba ndixhomekeke ngakumbi kwi-pornography yokwamkelwa ngokwesondo.

Ndijonge imagazini ethambileyo ye-Maxim kwaye bendisakwazi ukuthetha ngayo notata. Ndibukele i-hard-core POV ye-porn kwaye ndisenokwabelana ngayo kwiCD nabahlobo abasondeleyo. Ndabukela i-superhero yekhathuni ye-cartoon kwaye ndingathanda ukuya kwikhompyuter yam. Kwaye xa bendikunye nekhompyuter yam, kutheni ndiyeke apho?

Ikhompyuter ayikhange igwebe, ibonelela nje, kwaye yamkelwe: i-pimp, ihenyukazi, umama.

Ewe kunjalo, ukudibana kwam nabasetyhini bokwenyani kwakuxhonywe kukudana, okwenze kwalula ukubuyela kwezo ndawo zazicocekile ngenxa yobunzima bokwenyani bobomi. Khange kufuneke nokuba ndiyicinge- iyasebenza nje. Njengepilisi.

Le mikhosi inqamlezileyo yandityhalela phambili ndedwa. Kungenxa yoko le nto-ubuncinci kum, kunye nabanye abayichaze kwiiforamu ezijikeleze iwebhu- ukuthetha nge-porn kuye kwakhulula kakhulu.

Ukuba ndixelela abanye, ikhompyuter ayisiyiyo kuphela indawo endinokuya kuyo ndiziva ndinyanisekile ngokwesondo. Kwaye ukuba abanye bayandamkela, andiziva ndineentloni. Kwaye ukuba loo minqweno ayinamahloni, baya kuphulukana nomnqweno omnyama we-taboo, kwaye ndilahlekelwe kukuqina kwam komzimba kubo. Kwaye emva koko andiziva ngathi yiyo yonke into endiyifunayo- ndiyifunayo - kwaye ndingaphonononga isondo ngokukhululekileyo.

Ngaphezu koko, iinkumbulo ezinxulunyaniswa neemvakalelo ezinamandla njengehlazo zibhalwe kakhulu; ke ukubulala ihlazo kunokunika ezi mfihlakalo zimnyama kwezinye iividiyo endandizibukele njengomntwana. Yeyiphi ekulula kakhulu ukuyishiya.

Mhlawumbi ayonyani ukuba isini sijongwe njengoluntu, ukuxhaswa luluntu, kunye nokunxibelelana njengokudlala imidlalo okanye ukwenza ubugcisa, kodwa ndiyazibuza ukuba zithini iindleko zobumfihlo ezijikelezileyo- ngakumbi kwiminyaka ye-Intanethi.

Eli nqaku lifumaneka kwi-intanethi kwi:

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/06/coming-out-as-a-porn-addict/277106/