Inokukunceda ngokwenene ukwazi ukuthetha nomntu omthembileyo malunga nezinto ojamelana nazo njengoko uqala kwakhona. Ingakumbi abazali bakho. Nanku omnye utata ekubuyiseni kwakhe ngokwakhe ngokuthetha ngokuthetha nonyana wakhe:
Okwangoku ndijamelana nemiphumo ye-porn ebangelwe yi-ED kwaye ndineeveki eziyi-8 ndingafumaneki kwi-PMO. Kutshanje ndithathe isigqibo sokwenza unyana wam oneminyaka eli-18 ubudala azi ngeziphumo ezinokubakho. Kwaye yandothusa into endiyifunde kuye. Akumangalisi ukuba axoxe nge-intanethi kunye namaqabane akhe. Kodwa omnye wabo sele walala ngesondo kwaye wabaxelela ukuba ukhetha ukujonga i-intanethi kwi-intanethi kumava okwenene ngesondo! - kwaye oku kukwiminyaka ye-17/18. Ndibuze unyana wam ukuba uhlala enamaphupha amanzi (yayiyincoko yasimahla kwaye ilula ngaphandle kokukhathazeka kwangaphambili).
Uthe wayenephupha elinye elimanzi ebomini bakhe ukuza kuthi ga ngoku. Xa wakhankanya oku kumaqabane akhe bahleka bonke. Isizathu sokuba bahleke kukuba akukho namnye kubo owakha wahlangabezana nephupha elimanzi. Ndingayibiza le sisalathiso esicacileyo somphumo onamandla we-intanethi ye-intanethi-ukuphazamisa ukukhula okuqhelekileyo ngokwesondo kwabakwishumi elivisayo. Eli lixesha eliqaqambileyo elifuna ukuboniswa kakhulu.
Ukuba unomzali oxhasayo, kodwa awuqinisekanga ukuba ungawuthetha njani umbandela wokusetyenziswa gwenxa kwe-porn kunye nokubuyisela kwimeko yesiqhelo, jonga la mava abafana:
Umlutha uxelela abazali bakhe-kunye nempendulo yabo (ibali elimangalisayo, elihambayo)
Nangona abazali bam bengabona bazali baxhasayo kodwa, bendisoyika kwaye ndinamathandabuzo ukuthetha ngayo. Namhlanje ndixelele utata wam ukuba adibane kwivenkile yekofu kwaye ndimxelele yonke into malunga ne-porn kunye ne-masterbation addiction. Uphendule wathi, "awukhathazeki, ndinawe kule nto. Ndiza kukunika inkxaso epheleleyo ukulwa nale nto. Yenza isenzo sakho kunye kwaye udubule ubomi obungcono, obunempilo kunye nobunemveliso. ” Ndiziva ndilula kwaye ngoku uTata wam uyazi ngayo, ndiza kubeka i-200% yomzamo kule nto. Ndimele ndikhahlele lo mkhwa ebomini bam ukuze ndiziphucule.
Ndinencoko emangazayo notata wam. Kulula ngokulula, ndavuma yonke into kuye kwaye ndamcela ukuba abeke iphasiwedi kwikhompyuter yakhe. Kwafuneka ndibenemvume yokwenza oku, kuba nge-K9 wayehlala ebuza ukuba yintoni kwaye ufuna ndiyisuse lol. Isizathu sokuba ndenze oku, kungenxa yokuba bendifuna ukuba yi-100% ndiqinisekile ukuba indawo endikuyo yayiyi-100% yamanyala. Enkosi Thixo!
Ndamangaliswa yimpendulo yakhe. Xa ndandimchazela yonke into wayeyiqonda kakhulu, wade wathi "ewe kuyinyani ukuba ndibukela iphonografi ngamanye amaxesha, kodwa andizange ndikhule nayo". Kwakungathi sobabini sikwiphepha elinye! Ndacacisa ukuba ndiqale ukuyibukela ngakumbi xa ubomi bam ekuhlaleni bungekho bukhulu (sobabini besazi xa kunje), kodwa ukuba andibazi ubungozi bayo.
Ndiyikhuphe konke: indlela endandiziva ndingakhathali ngayo kubafazi, malunga nokuqalisa kwam kunye neempawu zam zokurhoxa, malunga noxinzelelo lwam ngokwesondo. Indlela endandiziva ndinexhala ngayo okanye ukungakhathali xa abantu basetyhini babendijonga ngamehlo okanye bebonisa uthando. Ndicinga njani ukuba kukho into engalunganga ngam: Ngaba ndiyisitabane? Ngaba ndine testosterone esezantsi? Ingaba mhlawumbi ndingomnye wabo bantu babuthathaka nje… Ezi ngcinga ngokuqinisekileyo azikho mnandi.
Ewe kunjalo, ndiziva ndikhululekile ngoku ukuba ndiyazi ukuba indawo endikuyo yi-100% ye-porn yasimahla. Kuthathe ixesha ngoba bendingenaso isibindi sokumxelela, kodwa ngoku sigqibile, ndiziva ndikhululekile. Wayemangalisiwe xa ndimxelela ukuba andizange ndibe neenkuni zakusasa ixesha elide. Utata ufundele ubugqirha, ke xa ndakhankanya oku wabonakala othukile.
Kwaye bathi amadoda awanakuthetha ngeemvakalelo, tsss. Nina manenekazi ningafunda izinto ezimbalwa kuthi! Wayengenakuphika ukuba yena nomama babezibuza ukuba kutheni ndingenantombi, kodwa ngoku uyayiqonda. Ndatsho ukuba ndinemibuzo malunga noku, kodwa ke ndafumana i-YBOP kwaye kwakungathi ndifunda ngam kwiwebhusayithi. unokuthenjwa, emva koko ngeendlela zonke ubaxelele! Baza kukunceda kwaye mhlawumbi baya kukuqonda kakhulu.
Ndamxelela ke umama malunga nesiyobisi sam esingamanyala, kwaye wayendamkela, endilindeleyo. Kodwa eyona nto inomdla endifuna ukubhala ngayo yiminqweno yam ye-porn. Ndikhe ndanqwenela ngamandla kwezi ntsuku zintathu zidlulileyo. yomelele kunangaphambili. Ndiyathetha ukuba neminqweno ebuthathaka kunaleyo endiqhekeze ngalo lonke ixesha elidlulileyo, kodwa okoko ndathi kumama, ndikwazile ukuzilawula kwaye ndoyise iminqweno. http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/2qi36k/told_my_mom_about_my_porn_addiction_looking_for/
Ndingumfana oneminyaka eyi-15, kwaye uninzi lwabantu lukulindele ukuba ube sisiporho esinganyangekiyo kule minyaka. Malunga nonyaka ophelileyo ndaye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndiza kuqala ukuzitshintsha ndibengcono.
Kwiinyanga ze-8 emva koko, ndafumanisa ngeNoFap kwaye ukusukela ngoko bendikhona hayi kuyenza. Uninzi lwabahlobo bam benza NoFap ngenxa yokuba ndixelele abanye abantu, kwaye yanda ukusuka apho.
Umama wamncoma ngokuzimisela ukuqhuba umsebenzi rhoqo kwaye wathi ufuna ukuba naye. Ndaqala ukuthetha malunga nendlela endigqiba ngayo ukutshintsha, kwaye ekugqibeleni ndamxelela ngeNoFap.
Wayebanjwe nxamnye nayo kuba sathetha ngokuzivocavoca rhoqo, ukutya kunye nokuphucula njengomntu .. Walahlekelwa ngamazwi ngomzuzwana omncinane kodwa wabuxhasa.
Khange ndicinge tu ngokuxelela abazali bam ngalento kodwa yenzekile ngoku! Ndiyangcangcazela kodwa ndiyavuya ndiyenzile 🙂
Ndayidla le bullet, kwaye ndatshela ubaba malunga nomlutha wam. Kwaye ndimele ndithi uye waxhaseka kakhulu kwaye isigqibo sokuba simxelele siyinto ebalulekileyo ebomini bam.
Ndixelele umama wam….malunga nokuxhatshazwa kwam Kwaye akazange adideke kwaye aqondwe ngokuphathelele imeko yam yangoku. Ndamnika i-fowuni yam kuba nje ngokuba ndibukela i-porn kwi-shit. Ufake i-K9 blocker kwi-laptop yami kwaye ndicinga ukuba ndifikelela kwii-90 iintsuku. UKUPHILA KWABANTU ABAKHULU !!!
UKUQALA: Ndineenkalipho zokumxelela malunga nale nto, njengama-butterflies kwisisu sam.
Ndixelele umama malunga ne-YBOP kunye nomlutha wamanyala kwiiveki ezimbalwa ezidlulileyo emva kokubuyela umva kakubi. Ndidinga ukuva elam ilizwi lisitsho izinto ebezivile ingqondo yam kwaye zaziwa ixesha elide. Ekuqaleni, waphendula wathi "Ngaba uyadlala?, Iphonografi ilungile!"
Ndamxelela ukuba andiyi kuthetha naye malunga nayo de yambona Ividiyo yeTedX. Emva kokuba eyibonile… waqonda. Wakwazi ukubeka iziqwenga ndawonye. Ukuqonda nje ukuba lungakanani utshintsho olukhulu ebomini bam. Kwaye wandixelela ukuba ndiyamangalisa ngokwenza into enje. Kwaye bendisendleleni elungileyo.
Emva koko siqhubeka nokuthetha ngayo malunga neyure. Ndamxelela malunga ne-ED, i-HOCD, indlela endenyuka ngayo ukuya kwiindidi zoononophala ezigqithiseleyo. Oko yayikwenza kwimpilo yam yengqondo… njl. Ndimxelele ngezibonelelo ezimangalisayo ze-nofap / noporn. Ndiluphilisile njani uxinzelelo lwam lwasentlalweni, indlela ebendingasenawo uloyiko kwakhona, indlela endiziva ndithembele ngakumbi ngayo, kwaye ndinamandla / amandla okuba ndiphume ndiye apho ndize ndithathe ubomi ngeempondo. Kwakungamava amnandi kakhulu, ndiyacinga. Akawuqondi umzabalazo, ukuba lo ngumlutha. Kodwa inyani yokuba uyandixhasa yiyo yonke into ebalulekileyo kum.
Ndixelele abazali bam malunga nengxaki yam ne-PMO. Ukuba ikwenza unetyala, ekungafuneki ukuba ikwenze oko, kodwa ukuba iyakwenza oko, kufuneka uxelele umntu! Izokutya ngaphakathi ngaphandle ukuba awenzi njalo. Utata wandinceda ngokufaka i-k9 ukhuseleko kwiwebhu kwiPC yam kwaye ungaze undixelele iphasiwedi. Ukuba WONKE uye wasilela kwiNoFap, ndiyakucenga ukuba uqwalasele ukwenza oku (nokuba kukumisela ngokwakho kunye nokufihla iphasiwedi). Iphazamisa ipateni yakho kwaye inyanzele ukuba uphinde ucinge, nokuba unokufikelela kwenye indawo. Kum isikhumbuzi esongeziweyo sokuba abazali bam babekhona benqwenela okona kulungileyo kum yayiyinkuthazo engakumbi yokunamathela kuyo. Izifundo Ukusuka Unyaka Ngaphandle Kwezingcamango
Kulungile ndimxelele umama. Unqabile ukuhamba ndide ndimxelele ukuba yintoni ingxaki ngoba bendithumele umyalezo wokuba ikhona into. Ke ndaye ndathatha ixesha lam, ndambonisa i-yourbrainonporn.com kwaye ndamxelela malunga neengxaki zam kunye nokuqalisa kwam kwakhona. Khange ndicinge ukuba umama angayiqonda. Kodwa wathi ukulungele ukumamela ngaphandle kwesigwebo. Khange ndisebenzise negama elithi likhoboka.
Ndiqale ngokuxelela indlela endiyifumene ngayo i-yourbrainonporn, kunye nendlela isiza esichaza ngayo malunga nokubukela iphonografi kunye nendlela etshintsha ngayo indlela osabela ngayo kumantombazana kubomi bokwenyani. Inxalenye yeziyobisi ayisiyiyo nengxaki iphambili; ziziphumo. Kubonakala ngathi ndingumbonisi 'oqhelekileyo' njengoko ndingakhange ndibenomnqweno wokubukela iphonografi emva kweenyanga ezintathu ndingabinayo iphonografi (ukuphulula amalungu esini kunzima kakhulu), kwaye iziphumo zazingokoqobo kum (ED, akukho mvuselelo ukusuka kumantombazana okwenyani).
Ndixelele malunga nendlela iphonografi ekhokelela ngayo kwiifom ezigabadeleyo, ezinje nge-gay porn. Ndamxelela ukuba andikhange ndiye kude… andimxelelanga ukuba ndiye kwi-tranny porn nangona. Ayinamsebenzi.
Waxelela ibali lakhe. Wayengobhala bezinye iingqondo zeengqondo iminyaka emininzi, kwaye ngenye imini isigulane saye saqhekeza ubulili kwaye ekugqibeleni safa kuyo. Ngoko wayesazi ngengcamango yokunyuka kwesondo.
Emva koko ndambonisa i-matrix ebhodini lam elimhlophe kunye nemihla yawela. Kwaba nzima ukumxelela konke oku, kodwa wayeyayiqonda kwaye eyayixhasa. Wayecinga ukuba unamandla kum ukwenza oku kwaye unethemba lokuba ndiyakwenza. Sa sabelana ngumbumba.
Kwakungaqhelekanga njengoko ndandingakwazi ukulungiselela utyelelo lwakhe .. kodwa mhlawumbi kwakungcono ngale ndlela. Ubuncinci ukwenzakala kwam emlenzeni kwakungelolize, kuba ngokungathanga ngqo kwandikhokelela ekubeni ndimxelele ngayo yonke le nto. Enye into ehlekisayo: Ndacinga ukuba ukuba ndakuze ndixoxe naye ngale nto, uya kuthi aqikelele kuqala kwaye buza ukuba ndiyisitabane.
Wenza 🙂
Ndiye ndaba nemvakalelo xa ndifunda ngendlela owabelana ngayo nebali lakho noMama wakho. Ave intle. Kwakunesibindi kwaye ndiyazi ukuba ukuxabisile ukunyaniseka kwakho ekwabelaneni ngento eyimfihlo nocelomngeni. Ngoku wongeze umntu onika inkxaso nothando kwiqela lakho, ekuncoma ukuba uphumelele. Ndiyazibuza ukuba ndingabelana na noMama ngale nto. Mhlawumbi utata wam. Unzululwazi kwaye unokufumana izinto zobuchopho zinomdla. Kodwa uMama wam, andazi. Umhle kangakanani wakwazi ukuvula le ncoko noMama wakho. Ndiyathemba ukuba izokunceda kwiimvakalelo zakho, usazi ukuba abo bakungqongileyo nabo bayazibona njengeenxalenye zokurhoxa.
(Phendula) Ukuba ucinga kunokwenzeka ukuba uxelele utata wakho, kungenzeka kunjalo. Yinike nje ezinye iingcinga malunga nendlela oza kumazisa ngayo kuyo. Injalo kanye indlela endenze ngayo, cinga nje ngombuzo 'njani'. Ndingabeka i-ybrainonporn.com njengesixhobo esinomdla malunga nento oyifumeneyo ekuchaphazelayo.
Akukho sidingo sokuxelela ngobukrakra kwangoko. Thatha nje ixesha lokuba uxele ukuba ukusetyenziswa gwenxa kwe-porn ngabafana besizukulwana sethu. Yitsho ukuba ufumanise ukuba iyayitshintsha indlela ophendula ngayo kubafazi bokwenyani. Into yokuqala endiyithethileyo kumama yayikukuba akufuneki ukuba akhathazeke kuba bendifumana inkqubo yokuphilisa. Emva koko ndambonisa iwebhusayithi.
Ndikhe ndacinga ngokuxelela umama ngamanye amaxesha, kodwa andiqinisekanga ukuba angayiqonda na. Kwiingxoxo, akabonakali exolela abo baneziyobisi kunye neengxaki zeziyobisi. Andiqinisekanga ukuba angakuqonda oku nakancinci. Kodwa ndinokuthi ukuba kufuneka sinxibelelane kakhulu njengawe kunyoko. Haha, ngethemba lokuba akacingi ukuba ulikhoboka le-porn ye-gay! Usapho lwam belusoloko lucinga ukuba ndiyisitabane ngasemva kweentloko zabo. Ukuba banokubona kuphela ukuba ndithe tye kangakanani na!
Ndibaxelele abazali bam ngokuchacha kwam. Utata wam akazange ayifumane, kodwa wayekholelwa kum (Uneminyaka engama-61 kwaye uyayithiya i-intanethi). Umama waqonda. Bobabini baxhasile. Kwakungekho kubi kangako, abazali bam bathi sele benombono kuba ndimncinci kwaye nonke. Kwaye yandimangalisa indlela abasabela ngayo. Ndixelelwe ukuba ndiyangcatsha ukuthembela kwabo kodwa kufanelekile ukuba kulindelwe.
Izolo ndithethile notata malunga nokulutha kwam. Ndaziva ndikhululekile ngokumangalisayo ukuba ekugqibeleni nditsho ngokuvakalayo "Ndilikhoboka lamanyala kwaye ndiyaqalisa kwakhona."
Ngoku, andazi ukuba uninzi lwenu lukhululekile ukwenza oku kodwa ndifumene impumelelo ngokuba neqabane elinoxanduva lokuphendula. Kwaye ndingacebisa ukuba iqabane elinoxanduva lokuphendula libe ngumntu ongasoze ufune ukudanisa! Eyam ibinguMAMA. Injalo loo nto… Ndimxelele ngale ngxaki. Yayisesona sigqibo sihle endakha ndasenza. Ngoba? Ewe kuba andizange ndifune ukuxelela umama ukuba ndihlaziye i-pornography ngexesha lomhla. Ndiyakholelwa ngokwenene kulapho kwenzeka khona into kum.
Kwakungekho mnandi ukuthetha malunga ekuqaleni kodwa ukwazi ukuba ndandisenomntu ongandithandanga ngokungathandabuzekiyo nangona kukho umlutha wenza konke ukuhluka ehlabathini. Wayenomdla kakhulu ngokubiza nokuthumela imiyalezo imihla ngemihla ukubuza malunga nenkqubela yam. Kwasebenza kakuhle, kodwa kwakunzima. Leyo nyanga yokuqala yayingesihogo! Emva kokuphindaphindiwe kweenyanga ezimbini, ndandizikhumbuza ii-8 ngeenyanga.
Ndixelele umama malunga nayo kwiinyanga eziyi-6 ezidlulileyo emva kokusilela ngokungapheliyo iinyanga. Waqala ukukhala hayi kuba wayekhathazekile kodwa kuba wayeyiva kwaye eyiqonda intlungu yam. Utata wam naye wayevuya kuba ndabaxelela ngesiyobisi sam. Ndakwazi ukuhamba iintsuku ezingama-42 ngaphandle kwe-PMO emva kokuba ndibaxelele ukuba yeyiphi eyona ndlela inde kakhulu kwiminyaka emi-2. Bandincede kakhulu ngexesha lenkqubo. Nangona becinga ukuba ndikhululekile, ndiyathemba ukuba ndiza kukhululeka ngeli xesha ngokwaphula elona gama lide. Umnqweno omhle.
Abazali bam bangamaKristu (njengokuba ndinjalo). Ndixelele utata wam. Kakhulu kuba uninzi lwam umzabalazo luyafana nolwakhe. Ndikhumbula ngokucacileyo ngobo busuku umama ehleli nosapho phantsi esofeni xa ndandineminyaka eyi-9 kwaye iinyembezi zazichaza ukuba ufumene i-VHS ye-porn kwigumbi elingaphantsi kweVCR kwaye wabetha umdlalo ecinga ukuba yimboniso bhanyabhanya awayengayigqibanga, kodwa oko yayiyi-porn.
Ndiselula, kwaye kwakunzima kwintsapho yethu. Wenzakele, uhlazekile, njl njll, kwaye wayefuna ukuba siyazi isizathu sokuba uya kuhamba iintsuku ezimbalwa (waxolela kwaye ubudlelwane babo bubhetele kunanini ngaphambili), kodwa ndicinga ukuba kwavula umnyango kumlutha wam kwi-PMO njengoko Ndandimdala.
Xa ndamxelela ngaphezulu konyaka ophelileyo, ndamxelela ukuba ndimxolele ngento ayenzileyo nosokolayo nayo, kwaye ndiyaqonda ukuba kunzima ukukhaba. Ukuba nokholo (ukholo oluyinyani) kuya kwalatha abantu kuxolelo nothando. Ndiyathemba ukuba ungabelana nabo. Kukhulula kakhulu kwaye kunceda inkqubo ihambele enkululekweni.
Ndinabanye abantu ebomini bam abazimisele ukundinceda- utata wam. Ndiyazi ukuba kuyaphambana- kodwa uthe uza kundinceda. Nguye owandixelela ukuba le nto yayimbi xa ndandisemncinci- kodwa andimamelanga. Ndicinga ukuba uyavuya kuba ekugqibeleni ndiyayiqonda into awayeyithetha kwaye ndiyeka.
Olunye ulwazi ngemvelaphi: Ndineminyaka engama-21 ubudala, ndisahlala nabazali bam, kodwa ndiza kufunda phesheya ukuqala kwiveki ezayo kude kube nguJanuwari.
Imbali yomuntu, yeqa xa ungenanomdla:
Bendisokola ukuba likhoboka le-PMO malunga neminyaka elishumi ngoku. Namhlanje ekugqibeleni ndiye ndasifumana isibindi sokuxelela umama ngale nto.
Ukusukela oko ndaqala ukubukela iphonografi, ubomi bam bezentlalontle bebusile. Ndifudukele kwenye indawo ngaphambi nje konyaka wam wokugqibela kwisikolo samabanga aphantsi. Kwakungekho bantwana kwindawo yam entsha. Andikhange ndilunge kwisikolo sam esitsha nokuba bendinabahlobo abaninzi kumdala. Kwakungoku ngeli xesha ndiqala ukubukela iphonografi. Ukukhawulezisa ukuya phambili kwiminyaka emithandathu, malunga nokuthweswa isidanga (ndingumDatshi, ke inkqubo yethu yamanqanaba inokwahluka kweyakho), kwaye ndiye ndangumntu ongonelanga ngokwasentlalweni nokuzithemba okuphantsi kunye nobomi obuhlwempuzekileyo ekuhlaleni. Ndandisele ndizibuza ukuba ngaba i-porno yayinento yokwenza nayo, kodwa ngelo xesha yayingeyonto ngaphandle kokuzingela. Ndacinga ukuba mhlawumbi ndine-Asperger's syndrome, kodwa oko kwakungabonakali kuyinyani xa ndijonga kuyo ngakumbi.
Yayingunyaka onesiqingatha kuphela eyadlulayo ukuba ndafumanisa olu luntu, kwaye ibisiqingatha sonyaka endizamile ukwenza into malunga nesiyobisi sam. Ngoku ndinobomi obungcono ekuhlaleni kunangaphambili, kodwa ngokweemvakalelo, mhlawumbi ndibuthathaka kunalo naliphi na ixesha langaphambili ebomini bam. Emva phaya bendihlala ndibonwa njengomntu ongaqhelekanga kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo, kwaye kwathiwa ndimbi rhoqo kwiminyaka yokuqala. Ndine-acne cystic eyoyikisayo kunyaka onesiqingatha edlulileyo kwaye emva kokuzama yonke into, ndathatha i-accutane, eyanyanga i-acne yam kodwa yadandatheka njengempembelelo yecala.
Ukuxelela umama
Ndiyekile ukuthatha i-accutane malunga nesiqingatha sonyaka odlulileyo, kwaye ekuqaleni ukudakumba kwam kwaphela. Kodwa indenze ndaziqonda ngakumbi iingxaki zam. Andiqinisekanga, ngakumbi malunga nokubukeka kwam, nangona ndisebenza. Andikaze ndibenentombi kwaye ndamanga enye kuphela intombazana ebomini bam. Ndineentloni, kwaye ubomi bam bezentlalo, nangona ngethamsanqa bungcono kakhulu kunangaphambili, ayisiyiyo le ndiyifunayo.
Uninzi lwexesha, ndiziva ngathi ndikhona, endaweni yokuba ndiphile ubomi bam. Umama waqala ukuqaphela ukuba kukho into engalunganga, ukuba ndiziva ndiphantsi, kodwa qho xa endibuza ukuba kwenzeka ntoni ndandisithi ndilungile kuba andikwazi kuvulela nabani na. Khawuthelekelele, yintoni eyenze mandundu ngakumbi. Ukuvulela abantu malunga neemvakalelo zakho, nangona zoyikisayo, yenye yezona zinto zibalaseleyo onokuzenza ukuze uvalwe kwaye uqhubeke.
Yiza kwiveki ephelileyo, eholideyini, xa bendisandula ukuqala ukuncipha. Ndixelele umama malunga nezinto ezininzi, kodwa andizichazanga malunga ne-PMO. Ndamxelela nje ukuba ndinomlutha we-intanethi. Ukufika kwethu ekhaya, ndaphinda ndabuya emva kokufika ukuza kuthi ga ngoku (ubuncinci kwimigangatho yam), kwaye ndaye ndabhabha. Ndandinomsindo kwaye ndidanile ngesiqu sam. Oku beku izolo ebusuku. Emva koko, wavele wakhathazeka kangangokuba kwafuneka eyazi inyani kwaye ndade ndamxelela. Ndamxelela malunga nokusetyenziswa gwenxa kwe-porn kuchaphazela ingqondo. Ikhokelela njani kuxinzelelo lwasentlalweni, uxinzelelo, imiba yokuzithemba kunye ne-shebang iphela. Ndamxelela malunga (kwaye ndambonisa) le subreddit. Kwaye ndamjonga ukuba abe nguGary Wilson Uvavanyo olukhulu lwe-Porn, ukuze aqonde isayensi emva kwayo.
Kwaye kufuneka nditsho, bekungekho nzima ukuyenza njengoko bendicinga ukuba iyakuba njalo. Ndinethamsanqa lokuba nomama ovulekileyo engqondweni. Wayeqonda kakhulu kwaye "wonwabile" ukwazi ukuba kwenzeka ntoni kanye kanye. Uloyiko lokuxelela umama ngobuthakathaka bam kunye nomkhwa wam oneentloni wawubi ngakumbi kunokwenza oko.
Ndikude ekunyangeni, kodwa ukuthetha ngayo nomntu kuye kwandivumela ukuba ndifumane ukuvalwa. Iya kwenza kube lula ukuba ndiqhubeke. Lixesha lokuba ndiqale ukuhlala. Ndingacebisa ukuba nabani na avule iingxaki zakho kumntu onokumthemba. Ekugqibeleni wamxelela umama
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