Iyamangalisa. Andizange ndifumane i-PMO emva kobusuku obunentloni bokungabikho ngokupheleleyo kunye nomfazi endimthanda kakhulu. Kwakuyiyethu yokuqala (kwaye mhlawumbi yokugqibela) yamava esondo, kwaye ndaziva ndineentloni, ndihlazekile, ndididekile, kwaye ndisoyika. Andizange ndibe 'nokusilela ukuhambisa' ngokupheleleyo, nangona ukumiswa kwam kuye kwacotha kodwa ngokuthe ngcembe kwehla iminyaka embalwa.
Njengoko ndandifunda ii-akhawunti zokuqalisa kwakhona kwi-YBOP kwaye ndibonakalisa ukuziphatha kwam kwangaphambili, ndaqonda ukuba, nangona ndingakhange ndibukele i-porn yonke imihla, ndandixhomekeke ngokupheleleyo kwi-masturbation kunye ne-fantasy. Enyanisweni, lo mkhwa waqala xa ndandineminyaka eyi-12 okanye i-13 kwaye kwakungekho usuku oludlulayo xa ndingazange ndiF noF (fantasize kunye ne-fap) ubuncinane kanye ukuba akukho zihlandlo ezininzi ngosuku. Oku kongeza ukuya kwi-40 iminyaka ye-FMO (ifantasy, i-masturbation, i-orgasm) - nangona iminyaka eyi-10 yelo xesha nditshatile.
Kwiminyaka yakutshanje, ngenxa yokuhla kancinci kancinci kwe-virility (ukungakwazi ukukhupha, ukuthamba kwakamsinya, umthamo omncinci okanye ukukhupha i-ejaculate xa ndisiza, ukunqongophala kokuchama ngamanye amaxesha), ndiye ndangena kakhulu kwiividiyo 'zemfundo yesondo' (ngoku ndiqonda kakhulu. kwezi yayiyi-porn efihliweyo ngokwenene) kwaye kangangeenyanga ngexesha babeziqhelanisa ne-edging kaninzi ngemini, becinga ukuba oku kuya kunceda ukubuyisela i-libido yam (kwaye ndifunde malunga nokuhlelwa kwezinye iincwadi zeTantra). Impazamo enkulu - ngoku ndiyaqonda ukuba lo mkhwa nawo ube negalelo ekunciphiseni i-libido yam ngokuthe ngcembe - ngokuchasene noko ndandicinga ukuba ndenza (kunye noko kwakucetyiswa kwiincwadi).
Ngokukhawuleza nje ukuba ndiqalise ukufunda i-YBOP, ndaqonda ukuba i-fapping, i-fantasy kunye ne-edging - kunye nexesha lam (ngokuqhelekileyo i-1-2 amaxesha / ngeveki kodwa ngamanye amaxesha imihla ngemihla ye-4 okanye i-5 iintsuku ngexesha) ukubukela i-pornography kwaku-f-king up my. inkqubo. Wowu. Ngoko ngokukhawuleza ndaya kwi-PFMO - ikhululekile (i-Porn, iFantasy, i-Masturbation, i-Orgasm).
Namhlanje s imini 18 kwaye umahluko uye waba emangalisayo. Ndineminyaka engama-53, ngoko andizange ndiqalise ukukrazula kwi-Intanethi ye-Intanethi - ngakumbi njenge-Playboy / Penthouse centerfolds; kodwa ngokusisiseko ndiye ndafafa kwaye ndicinga nge-40 iminyaka. Ndanditshatile ishumi leminyaka, kwaye ndinezithandwa ezininzi, kodwa iF&F ayizange ime.
Ndiqaphele ntoni kuba akukho PFMO? Umgca omkhulu othe tyaba malunga neentsuku ezili-10, emva koko oku kurhoxa 'kwencasa' eyahlukileyo yomtsalane ngabafazi endiya kubagqitha nje ngokujonga okuphakathi. Ndifumana uhlobo lolonwabo olumnandi nje ngokuba phakathi kwabasetyhini endingazange ndibenalo ngaphambili. Kukho into encinci 'yokungazi' kwabasetyhini xa ndibabona - kufana naxa ingqondo yam ingayi kwindawo yefantasy, indlela endiyibona ngayo iyanda ngaphaya kwenkangeleko yangaphandle.
Ndizithembile ngakumbi xa ndinxibelelana nabasetyhini abanomdla kwaye ukuzithemba kwam ngokwesondo kuyanda - phezolo nje kwitheko encokolwa kwaye eqhulwa kwaye ebethwa ngomfazi obuhle bakhe kunye nokwabelana ngesondo kwiiveki ezintathu ezidlulileyo bekuya kundoyikisa.
Ndiyaqaphela ukuba uninzi lokungakhuseleki kwam kwezentlalo, ukucaphuka, ukungakhathali kunye nemvakalelo epheleleyo yokuba 'Andikho kulunga' - (endizame ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukuzisebenzisa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo zonyango-ingcebiso, i-hypnosis, iindibano zocweyo, ngakumbi) ngokuqinisekileyo yayiyinyani. ezinxulumene ne-dopamine dysregulation, i-fapping kunye nefantasy. Kuyamangalisa ngokupheleleyo.
Kufana nawo onke la mandla obomi kunye namandla kunye nogxininiso kunye namandla awayesuswa kunye namandla engqondo kunye nokugxila okwachithwa kwifantasy (kuba ndiza 'kuqokelela' imifanekiso yabasetyhini abakhangayo njengoko ndandihamba ngosuku endiya kuphuma ngalo. ukuya kuthi ga xa ndifika ekhaya ebusuku - yeyiphi inkunkuma ephazamisayo yengqondo-amandla) yafumaneka ngequbuliso kum ukuze ndiphile ubomi bam, ndifezekise iinjongo zam, kwaye ndifikelele ngendlela ephilileyo, yabantu basetyhini. Kusisiqabu esinje ukuba singakhethi buso babasetyhini kunye nokucima loo sekethi ezenzekelayo enokuthi iqalise ngokukhawuleza i-trailer yengqondo-porn xa ndibona umfazi onomtsalane! Ndiyazi ukuba ndise early kolu hambo; Ndinethamsanqa kuba ndandingenawo umkhwa wokungamanyala; kwaye, ndisenemiba yempilo yomzimba (ubukhulu becala i-testosterone ephantsi) enokuthi ibe negalelo ekubeni nganeno kunam. Kwaye, oku kuqonda kube sisiqabu esikhulu. Okokuqala ngqa kwiminyaka yam ye-5 ndiziva ndiyindoda. Ndiyazi ukuba oku kukuqala kohambo kwaye ndiyazi ukuba andiyi kubuyela kwi-PFMO. Wowu.
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