Mholo,
Kudala ndifunda kwaye ndibhala kule reddit kangangexesha elithile ngoku kwaye ndiyigqibile injongo yam yokuqala yeNoFap eyayiza kuhamba iintsuku ezili-100 ngaphandle kokufota okanye iphonografi.
Andingombhali obalaseleyo njengabanye benu kwaye le ngxelo inde ngokwenene (kwaye ayihlekisi kakhulu ndiyavuma), ngenxa yoko ndigqibe kwelokuba ndiyahlule ibe ngamacandelo amathathu ngenxa yokucaca: kutheni ndiqalile, inkqubo, iziphumo.
Kutheni ndiqala i-NoFap
Esona sizathu sithe ngqo kum kukuba bendinamava e-ED kunye nentombazana ekunokwenzeka ukuba ikufutshane njengoko unokufikelela kwimfezeko kwisimo esingeyiyo se-porn. Ndiyintombi enyulu kwaye bendine-ED ngaphambili kodwa ndicinga nje ukuba kungenxa yeqabane lam endingakhange nditsaleleke kulo. Kodwa le ntombazana yayiyindlela yam, iswiti, umntu wokuqala endamvulela kuye. Ngapha koko, ngaphambi kwale ntombazana bendihlala ndisoyika ukusondelelana; Ndisoloko ndicinga ukuba andonelanga, andonelanga kwaye bendizivalela kulo nabuphi na ubudlelwane. I-ED yayisesona sizathu siphambili sokuba izinto zingakhange zisebenze nale ntombazana "igqibeleleyo".
Ndandikhe ndeva ngemiphumo emibi yokuphulula amalungu esini kunye ne-porn ngaphambili, ngo
amasuntswana kunye neqhekeza, apha naphaya. Ngaphezu kwesiqingatha sexesha ezizezi
ngokwembono yamaKatolika endiyikhabileyo, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha oku
iya kuvela kumthombo ongathathi hlangothi ngokupheleleyo ngokunjalo. Nam ndaqalisa
qaphela ukuba ukusebenzisa kwam iphonografi kunye nezihlandlo endiziphulula ngayo amalungu esini
inyuke kakhulu. Ndiyenza 5-6 amaxesha ngemini, kancinci KAKHULU. Bekuya kuba njalo
ndithathe uninzi lwexesha lam lokuphumla kwaye andithandi ukuchitha ixesha lam (okwangoku
ngokumangalisayo ndiyichithe kakhulu). Nam bendingenawo amandla angako okanye
gxininisa xa ndisekhaya kuba i-porn yayifumaneka ngamaxesha onke.
Oku, kudityaniswa ne-ED kwandinika isizathu esinamandla sokulandela iNoFap. Nge
okokuqala ndacinga ukuba yi-porn kuphela. Ngoko emva kokwahlukana ndayeka
ukuyibukela, okokuqala iveki enye, emva koko kukuzinkcinkca ngocwangco ngempelaveki;
emva koko iiveki ezi-2 ngaphandle kwe-porn, enye ukuzinkcinkca ngempelaveki. Ekugqibeleni a
inyanga kunye nokunye ukuzinkcinkca. Ngeli xesha lokuyeka iphonografi "ndalwa
umnqweno” ngokuphulula amaphambili ngaphandle kwephonografi. Eyona nto yayithetha ukuba mna
wayesaphulula amaphambili kakhulu. ANDIFUMANA NAZIPHI IZIPHUMO EZINHLE
NGOKUKWEHLUKA KWI-PORN YODWA kodwa uqhubeke nokuphulula amalungu esini.
Emva kwezi nzame zokuqala ndaye ndagqiba kwelokuba ndiyeke ukuziphulula amalungu esini. A
umhlobo wam wayendixelele (ngokungaqhelekanga) ukuba akazange aphulule amalungu esini
kangangeenyanga ezi-4 kanye kwaye oku kwandinika umbono wokuzama ngokunjalo. Xa ndi
Ndiqale ndaxelela i-3-4 yabahlobo bam abasenyongweni “Iiveki… ilungile
ibe ziiveki ezi-3” njalo-njalo. Ibiyinxalenye enika umdla yenkqubo ukubukela iintsuku
Yiya ngase. Oko kusizisa ku...
Inkqubo
Ndafumanisa ukuba ukulwa nomnqweno kwakungekho nzima kakhulu kodwa oku mhlawumbi
ngenxa yeemeko eziluncedo. Ndiqale iNoFap ngexesha elide kakhulu
unyaka wekholeji oxakekileyo. Kwafuneka ndihlale kwithala leencwadi imini yonke. Ndiyakhumbula
kwiiveki zokuqala ze-3 ndiza kufumana ukukhanya kwemifanekiso ye-porn ngamaxesha onke
kwaye iya kuba nomsindo ngokwenene. Kodwa andizukuyikhupha idipper yam
esidlangalaleni, ngoko izinto zahamba kakuhle. Oku kwadityaniswa kunye
Iingcinga ezinje “andizukuvumela i-ED yonakalise ubudlelwane kwakhona”… a
isizathu esinamandla sokuhlala endleleni. Kwakhona, into yokuba sele ndinayo
Ngaphambili wayeka ukubukela i-porn (ngelixa usaphulula amaphambili) unokuba nayo
ndincedile.
Ukuhlela : Ndikhe ndalala kancinci ngezinye imini. Ungaze ixesha elide
amaxesha (imizuzwana kakhulu) kodwa ngaxa lithile ndaphantse ndafikelela
i-orgasm. Oku akulunganga kuba i-edging ikunika ukungxama kwe-dopamine…
usaphulula amaphambili. Kodwa andizange ndiphinde ndiyimisele ibheji. Ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, andikayenzi
wayenomnqweno wokuqukuqela iiveki ezi-2-3 sele izinto zihamba ngokwenene
kuhle ngoku.
Iphupha elimanzi : Ndafumana mhlawumbi 6-7 emanzi amaphupha ewonke, nge 4-5
ukukhutshwa kwasebusuku. I was really excited to get these since my friends
bonke baye banamava oku kunye nenyaniso yokuba ndifumene i-nocturnal emission
indenze ndaziva ndiqhelekile noko. “Ekugqibeleni I am reset” ndacinga. I
uye waziva unetyala emva koku kukhupha. Amaxesha amaninzi i
amaphupha ahamba nawo ibiyimifanekiso yamanyala nyani kwaye bendiphupha
ukuba ndibukele i-porn kwinkqubo. Ukuziva unetyala kwavela
into yokuba ndandicinga ukuba ndibukele i-porn xa ndandizithembise
hayi ukuba. Le mvakalelo yokuziva unetyala ihamba ngokukhawuleza kakhulu kodwa kunjalo
yandikhathaza kancinci. Ukufunda kwiReddit kuncede kakhulu.
Iziphumo
Ewe, eli licandelo elinika umdla. Ngamafutshane iNoFap ikunika a
Imvakalelo yoxolo lwangaphakathi nto leyo ikwenza uzithembe ngakumbi. Ndaziva ukuba
Ndiye ndalungelelana ngakumbi kwaye isiphumo siyakhula kancinci. Pha
yi "ncopho / intlambo" eguquguqukayo: incopho yokuqala yayingamandla amakhulu endiwafumeneyo
emva kweeveki ezi-2-3. Le yimvakalelo ephambeneyo yokuphila kakuhle, ndaziva ngathi ndinjalo
kwiziyobisi. Abantu babendibuza ukuba ndiyazisebenzisa na iziyobisi. Emva kweveki eyi-1
amandla amakhulu ndibuyele kwisimo esizinzile kodwa ndihleli kakhulu
ngaphezulu "kugxile" kunokuba xa ndiPMOing.
Imiba eluncedo yeNoFap ayikayeki kum. Iyagcina
ukuba ngcono. Ndifumana iintlobo "zenqanaba eliphezulu" rhoqo ngeentsuku ze-20-40
okanye njalo. Ngosuku olungaphambi kwayizolo ndivuke ndaziva ngathi ndine-positive
itshintshiwe. Yimvakalelo ebambekayo kakhulu kwaye ihlala isakha kwaye injalo
kukhatshwa kukunyuka kokuzithemba.
Umthambo omncinci wokuqinisa ukuzithemba nokuzithemba kwakho:
nanini na ufuna ukwenza into kodwa ungayenzi kuba uyonqena
okanye woyike kancinci okanye umsebenzi awumnandanga, YEHLA IMPENDULO YAKHO KUNYE
YENZE NANJE.
Umzekelo, ukuba ndifuna ukuba ne-coke kwaye akukho nanye endlwini,
Ndizakuphuma ndiyithenge, nangona izondithatha imizuzu eyi-10 okanye ngaphezulu
nokuba ndikwinkqubo yokwenza enye into enika umdla
kwaye andifuni ukusuka esitulweni sam. Ukuba kukho into endiyifunayo, ndiyazinyanzela
ukuya kuyithatha.
Eli cebiso livela kwincwadi "yokuthatha" ngumfana ogama lingu-60 iminyaka
umngeni. Andiyiyo ne-PUA enqwenelayo kodwa ndifunde okuninzi
umbandela oxubusha loo mbandela ngaphandle kokuwusebenzisa. Uninzi lwalo lwalubonakala
eyilwe kwaye ayikho ngqiqweni. Iincwadi ezi-2 kuphela ezicofe ngokwenene kwaye zenziwe
Ndiyaqonda ukuba izinto zezona yiminyaka engama-60 yomngeni kunye noMarko
Incwadi kaManson, zombini ziyafana kodwa zihlola iinkalo ezahlukeneyo ze
ingcamango efanayo enkulu - ukunyaniseka. Ndicebisa ukuba ufumane enye ngeminyaka engama-60
umceli mngeni, nokuba njengam awucwangcisi ukwenza “izinto zokwenyani zePUA”,
yincwadi elungileyo malunga nokuba yindoda.
Faka le ngcebiso ngelixa usenza i-NoFap kwaye amanqanaba akho okuzithemba kufuneka enyuke ngokubonakalayo.
Ndithetha ngoku kakhulu: Ndiyathetha xa ndingathandi
into. Ngaphambili iimvakalelo zam zazingekho ncam kodwa mna
waba yinkosi yokucinezela nokubafihla kwaye kuya kuba njalo
ayisebenzi ngokupheleleyo kwi-95% yezinto ezindicaphukisayo. Ngoku ndithi
izinto. Ndiyenza ngabom kuba ndicinga ukuba yinxalenye yendlela eya
ukuba ngumntu oqhelekileyo kwakhona. Kodwa kwakhona kuvakala kulungile ukukuvumela
abantu bayazi ukuba awuyithandi le nto bayenzayo kwaye ungabi yile
ukwamkela “umfana olungileyo” ngalo lonke ixesha.
Uphuculo olungenammiselo:
- Ndayeka ukuluma iinzipho! Iyaphambana. Bendimane ndiluma iinzipho
oko ndandineminyaka emi-5. Bakhangeleka bembi ngokwenene. Ndizamile ukuyeka 3-4 amaxesha kodwa
andizange ndiphumelele, nangona kunjalo ukusukela ngomhla wama-88 okanye into enjalo nje
wayeka ukuyenza, NGAPHANDLE KOKUZAME. Iyamangalisa, andazi ukuba kutheni
kwenzeka kwaye ngethemba ukuba iya kuhlala. Le nkcukacha inye yandenza ndaqonda
ukuba uphuculo luya kuhlala luza emva kweentsuku ezingama-90. - Ndandinamathandabuzo ndingekho zingqondweni ngokukwazi kwam ukuzikhusela. Oku
kubonakala emaphupheni am: ndingabetha umntu kwaye ukubetha kuya kuba njalo
ndibuthathaka ukuba umntu angahleka okanye ndizive nyani
ndaxakwa kukuba uqhankqalazo lwam belunowimpy. Ndiyazi ukuba ivakala ingaqhelekanga.
Ingakumbi into yokuba ndineminyaka eyi-6 ngoku ndisiya ejimini, andiyi
jonga i-buff ephezulu, kodwa inkulu kunabantu abaninzi endibaziyo kwaye ukuba ndibethe umntu, ndiye
yazi izakuba buhlungu. Ukanti eli phupha lahlala libuya kakhulu. Ukususela ngosuku
50 okanye ngoko ELI PHUPHA LISIBILE. Enyanisweni ndicinga ukuba ngenye imini
Ndiphuphe ukuba ndimtshabalalise ngokupheleleyo umfana. Andiqinisekanga, nangona kunjalo
akazange ayibhale phantsi ngelo xesha. Gcina engqondweni ukuba andizange ndibe kwi
Umlo onzima ngaphambili kwaye ANGINGOMNTU onobundlobongela, ngoko akukho mfuneko yokufowuna
amapolisa. Kukukhula kokuzithemba ukuthetha. BOUYA. - Ndiqalile ukukhangela phezulu xa ndihamba.
- Andinangxaki yokujongana namehlo xa ndifuna.
Nangona kunjalo ndihlala ndilibala ukwenza njalo kwaye ndijonge macala onke njengoko bendiqhele ukwenza,
ngumkhwa wendele nzulu. Kufuneka ndibeke ingqondo yam ukuba ndiyenze ngakumbi
rhoqo. - Ndigxile kakhulu kwaye ndicinga ukuba ndifunda izinto ngokukhawuleza.
Ingqwalasela yi-100% yokwenyani. Ndicinga ukuba ukukwazi kwam ukukhumbula izinto kuye kwaba njalo
ngcono kodwa le inokuba yi-placebo. - Ndiziva ndiphumle ngokupheleleyo.
Iinjongo ezizayo
Injongo yam elandelayo kukufikelela kwiintsuku ezingama-250, ngoko unyaka, emva kweminyaka emi-2 emva koko
ndiyathemba ukuba ndiya kulibala malunga ne-fapping! Iziphumo eziluncedo zeNoFap
kubonakala ngathi kugcwala njengoko ixesha lihamba ngoko akukho sizathu sokuyeka! I
umnqweno sele kulula kakhulu ukulwa ngoku.
Enkosi kakhulu kuluntu lwe-NoFap, INGAKUMBI kubantu abaye bakwenza oko
seta kwakhona izinto zokubala zabo kwaye iposelwe ngayo. Ndiyazi ukuba oku kuvakala kancinci
engaqhelekanga/ithetha kakubi, kodwa ezo zithuba ziyayomeleza inkuthazo yam. Ndiyazicingela
“Andifuni ukuba ikhawuntara yam enkulu [isibindi sobudoda…] sibuyele kumhla woku-1
kwaye ube ngomnye waba bafana”. Ngethemba ayikhubekisi namnye kuni. Yiyo
idabi elinzima, ndiyathemba ukuba nonke niphumelele kwaye nifezekise iinjongo eninazo
zibekeleni nina.
Umzabalazo ufanelekile, ungavumeli ingqondo yakho ikukhohlise ukuba ucinge ngenye indlela.
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