Uma kukulawula kunokuba ulawule
NgoDisemba 14, 2012 nguRobert Taibbi, uLCSW
I-Porn iba yinkinga evame kakhulu futhi ekhulayo. Abalinganiselwa abangu-20-30 baseMelika (cishe abantu abaningi) babheka izithombe ezingcolile nsuku zonke. I-saturation ne-porn iyabangela intsha yabantu abadala (yebo, amadoda futhi) badinga i-Viagra ukuze ibhekane nokungasebenzi kahle kwe-erectile ngenxa yezinguquko emakhemikhali abo obuchopho. Okuphazamisayo nakakhulu kuyimpembelelo ezinganeni (ezinye ezincane njenge-10) ezibuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile futhi zidala izinguquko ezinkulu ebuchosheni babo ngenxa yobudala bazo futhi ngoba izithombe ezingcolile ziza ngaphambi kokuba zibe nobuhlobo obusekelwe ngokoqobo nomunye umuntu.
Okokugcina kukhona ukulutha kwezidakamizwa ezingaphazamisi kuphela ubulili bobulili obubambisene kodwa ngokusobala nohlangothi lomzwelo. Futhi njengotshwala noma izidakamizwa, kukhona umugqa omuhle lapha phakathi kokuthembela nokulutha.
Ukuxhomeka kuyisidonsa, ukulangazelela - ukuhlola ikhabhinethi yotshwala ukuze uqiniseke ukuthi ngeke uphume ngoLwesine noma ubheke phambili ngo-4 ntambama nge-cocktail yokuhlwa. Ngomlutha lo muthi ungumphathi wakho. Uyakha nxazonke, awukwazi ukuyilawula, ukweqa akuyona inketho, ngisho nomcabango wokwenza ngaphandle kudala ukwesaba.
I-Porn iyimbonga enamandla kakhulu kwi-intanethi. Njengoba nje i-heroin umlutha noma ukubekezelelana ngokweqile kwandisa, kunjalo nalabo abatholwa yizocansi. Ngokwemvelo noma ngeshwa kunezinhlobonhlobo ezingapheli zezinhlobo namasayithi, ukulungele ukugcwalisa noma yiliphi izinga elisha oyifunayo - awulokothi uphumelele.
Futhi ekugcineni sinakho oxytocin. Yilokho imitholampilo yokulutha kwabafana. U-Oxytocin yi-chemical esiza omusha abazali isibopho sabantwana babo, kubangela imibhangqwana ethandana ukubophezela komunye nomunye. Nganoma yiluphi usuku olunikeziwe izinga le-oxytocin labesifazane lingase lilingane nezikhathi ze-10 eziphakeme kunomuntu. Ngalokho akusho ukuthatha okuningi (ngokungazelelwe ugeza izitsha, ulethe izimbali) ukuze azwe sengathi uxhumekile. Yini eyenza i-oxytocin yamadoda? Uyaziqagela - sex, ikakhulukazi i-orgasm. Njengoba abantu bebuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile bavame ukuba nama-orgasms (ngenxa yezibuko ze-neurons kanye ne-interactive nature wezingosi ezingcolile) ezandisa i-oxytocin yazo bese zibopha izithombe ezingcolile. (Ukuze uthole isifinyezo esihle se-porn nobuchopho hlola i-Oct '12 Men's Health)
Ngenkathi konke lokhu okwakhiwa kwamakhemikhali kanye ne-physiology kuqhubeka, kukhona futhi ingxenye engokwengqondo. Njengezinye izinkinga, i-porn yisisombululo esibi kwezinye izinkinga. Ziyini lezo zinkinga? Abanye abasolwa:
Ukucindezeleka. Lapho ukucindezeleka kudlula amabhange ayo, kulula ukuthuthela ezindaweni ezingavunyelwe ukuthi singayinaki emanzini, amahora omusi. Ukucindezeleka kuhamba ngokuzivikela kwemvelo. Kwabanye kuphathelene ne-porno, abanye abanye baphuza noma bahlanganyele, noma bethenga nge-inthanethi ngezicathulo. Khetha ubuthi bakho.
Ukukhokha. Ukuvama kwesibindi kuvame ukuvela emithonjeni ye-2 - ukugcwaliswa kwempilo yakho nge "amahlombe" amaningi kunokuba ufune, nokuntuleka kokugqugquzela. Ngezimfuno Ngisho ukwenza lokho okumele ukwenze kunokuba kudingeke ukuthi kuthatha umphefumulo wakho kanye nesifiso sakho. Uma uhamba ngezinyathelo zokugaya ama-hamburgers e-McD's kungenzeka ukuthi kufanele-umsebenzi, hhayi ukukhathazeka kwakho - futhi ungashesha ngokushesha. Ungase ube nesithukuthezi kancane uma kukhona ukukhuthazwa - osebenza naye ukukhuluma ngeveke lakhe noma umsebenzi walabo abakuzungezile ngesikhathi sokudla kwasemini. Thatha kumuntu osebenza naye noma ekuphuthumeni kwasemini futhi uzoba nesithukuthezi. I-Porn inikeza ukuvuselela okuningi uma uzizwa ungenelisekile futhi ungaqinisekisi.
Intukuthelo. Intukuthelo ixubana kahle namafomu. Uma wenza lokho okufanele ukwenze ngoba othile (noma lelozwi elibucayi ekhanda lakho) uthi, kulula ukuthukuthela ekugcineni ukwakha. Uma ikhula ngokwanele, ukuthambekela ukukwenza ngoba ufanelwe. Ngakho-ke ugoqa ku-intanethi emsebenzini wakho ku-4 pm ngoba ukhathele ngokomzimba futhi ukhathele ngokomzwelo ngalokho okwenzile usuku lonke. Uhlehlisela ku-intanethi ngo-11 pm ngoba uzizwa umkakho ulokhu ekugubha kusukela usufika ekhaya, futhi uzizwa ufanelwe, ngoba kungenye indlela eyinqaba, ukubuyela kuye (ngisho noma lokhu konke kusengqondweni yakho futhi akazi lutho ukuthi ucabangani).
Ubulili. Noma ukuntuleka. Ungacabanga ukuthi lokhu kufanele kube phezulu ohlwini, kodwa ngokuvamile akunjalo. Kodwa kusobala ukuthi kukhona lapho. Uma uzizwa ucansi, unqanyuliwe, ucindezelekile ngokobulili, izithombe zobulili ezingcolile ze-intanethi kubonakala sengathi ziyisixazululo esikhulu - njengokungathi uqinisile njengoba ungathola ngaphandle kweqiniso.
Inkinga futhi yilezi zingabangela ukuhlukumezeka futhi uma usuxhomeke ezithombeni ezingcolile ukubhekana nabo, uthola isisindo, ikhompiyutha yobuchopho idlulela, futhi usendleleni eya ekubhebhethekeni.
Indlela yokuphuma? Njengamakhono amaningi okulutha okudinga udinga ukubhekana nezici ze-2 ngesikhathi esisodwa. Ukuziphatha kufanele uphule iphethini. Yini enconywa kulabo abathuthukisa i-ED akuyona i-Viagra kodwa i-turkey ebandayo - ukuziyeka - ayikho i-porn, ayikho into yokushaya indlwabu (ngoba uvuselela kalula i-intanethi amafantasi ngenkathi i-masturbating) izinyanga ze-6 noma ngaphezulu (ungathola amawebhusayithi lapho abantu bazimisele ukukhuluma ngalokhu) ukusiza ukuphula umjikelezo nokulawula kabusha ubuchopho bakho.
Okunye ukulungisa inkinga eyisisekelo. Uma kumayelana nokwenza lokho okufanele kodwa hhayi okufunayo, thola izindlela zokwandisa okufunayo empilweni yakho. Uma kumayelana nokukhuthaza, thola ezinye izindawo ongazilinganisa nokuthi 4 pm uhudule uhambe kude nekhompyutha yakho. Uma ukucindezeleka, ditto. Uma ukucasukela abanye - umphathi wakho, umlingani wakho - zama ukuthola ukuthi yini ofuna bayishintshe bese bekhuluma - badinga izabelo eziyinselele kakhulu, badinga isikhathi esithile sokudideka lapho ufika ekhaya. Uma kumayelana nocansi, yenza okufanayo - thola ukuthi ufunani bese ukhuluma.
Akudingeki ukuthi ukwenze kahle, vele ukwenze ngokwehlukile. Ukubalwa kwezinyathelo zezingane, vele uqale. Uma uqhubeka wenza into efanayo uzoqhubeka uzizwa ngendlela efanayo.
Ekugcineni, ngiyabona ukuthi konke kulula ukukusho, kodwa ngokuvamile kunzima ukukwenza. Ngakho thola ukwesekwa - kusuka kumlingani, umngane, ochwepheshe. Thola usizo ukushintsha okwenzayo ukuze ushintshe okwenzayo.
Mhlawumbe sekuyisikhathi sokudonsa ipulagi.
Xhumanisa esihlokweni - Ukuhola kakhulu?
Amazwana: URobert Taibbi, ngudokotela owaziwayo, umbhali nomlobi wezincwadi zabaeluleki nabaphathi babo. Kulokhu okuthunyelwe kwe-PT uchaza i-ED eyenziwe ngocansi, futhi uphakamisa inyanga ye-6 ngaphandle kocansi kanye nokushaya indlwabu kungadingeka.
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