Ake ngiqale ngokusho ukuthi ngishaye indlwabu ku-porn iminyaka engu-8. Kungaba kanye ngosuku, kabili ngosuku, noma ngaphezulu. Ngangingomunye walabo bantu ababedlulela ezintweni ezeqisa ngokwedlulele. Ngishaye indlwabu ezintweni zobungqingili eminyakeni embalwa edlule, futhi kwaze kwaba ezinyangeni ezimbili ezedlule lapho ingqondo yami yazibuza, "Ngingumlingani?" Lokhu kubangele ukukhathazeka okuningi ne-OCD ukuthi kwenzeke. Ngisenakho lokhu, kepha hhayi ngezinga ebengikade nginalo.
Uma umuntu ehlangabezana nento enjengale, iseluleko sami esihle kakhulu kungaba ukuyeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile. Ngilwile ukukhathazeka ngokwenza into engenze ngakhathazeka kakhulu; ngizitshela ukuthi ngingungqingili. Ngaziphoqa ukuthi ngihlale phansi ngicabange ngemicabango yezitabane. Futhi, bangivuse kakhulu esontweni lokuqala. Kepha, kulawa masonto e-3 asanda kwedlula, ngibonile ukuthi le micabango isibe LOT LESS LESS. Ngisengavuswa yibo, kepha kudinga umzamo. Uma udidekile ngokuthi ungubani, kufanele uzibuze, “Ngake ngaba nale mizwa ngaphambi kokubuka izithombe ezingcolile?” Njengoba ngihleli lapha ngithayipha lokhu, ukukhathazeka okuncane kuyangishaya. Kepha emasontweni ambalwa edlule bekukubi ngendlela emangalisayo.
Ngingaluleka noma ngubani ohlangabezana nento efanayo yokuzindla, ayeke izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, futhi aziphazamise ngomsebenzi. Futhi, ungalwi nemicabango. Ngokuzimisela, ungakwenzi.
Lokhu akuhlangene nokuya ocansini. Ihlobene nezithombe zobulili ezingcolile nokuthi zisithonya kanjani. Ubuchopho bunepulasitiki. Iyashintsha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Ngikholwa ngenhliziyo yonke ukuthi abantu bazalwa benjalo. Indaba yami injengezinye eziningi ezilwa ne- "HOCD." Yize, leli gama liqanjwe ngokungalungile, ngokuyisisekelo likhathazeka ngokweqile ukuthi ngabe umuntu uyisitabane noma cha. Ngokunjalo, kunezimo lapho abantu abayizitabane bengathola khona "i-SOCD" noma bakhathazeke ngokweqile ngokuqonda.
Kungani lokhu kuyinkinga? Kuyinkinga ngoba le micabango ibangela ukukhathazeka okukhulu futhi ayihambisani nesimo sethu sangempela. Nayi indaba yami. Impilo yami yonke, bengingene kubantu besifazane. Ngingabala ama-crushes angama-30 engake ngaba nawo esikhathini esedlule kwabesifazane ekhanda lami. Ukuqothuka kwami kokuqala kwakuseTinkerbell lapho ngineminyaka engu-6 kuphela ubudala. Lokho kwakubuya lapho ngangingazi lutho ngothando. Kuyo yonke leyo minyaka futhi kuze kufike esikoleni esiphakathi, esikoleni esiphakeme, kuze kube manje. Angizange ngibe nokuchoboza okukodwa, noma imizwa yobulili kunoma imaphi amadoda engangiwazi.
Uyabona inkinga? Phakathi nalesi sikhathi esiningi, ngangishaya indlwabu ezithombeni ezingcolile. Ngaba nentshisekelo ezintweni eziningi ezingafuneki, ukuthanda kwami kwanda futhi kwanda. Ekuqaleni, kwaqala ngezithombe ezithambile, kwabe sekulandela izithombe ezingcolile zobungqingili, bese kuthi ezinye izinto ezimnyama nezisindayo angifisi ukuzifaka ohlwini. Kulo nyaka odlule, nakwezinye izikhathi ezimbalwa ezedlule, ngashaya indlwabu emicabangweni yobungqingili. Kwakuyizinyanga ezimbalwa ezedlule lapho ngema khona ngazibuza, "Ngingumlingani?" Yilapho izinto zaphuma khona zingalawuleki.
Abantu bavame ukuthi, “akukuhle ukucindezela imizwa yakho!” Lesi sitatimende siyiqiniso, kepha angikaze ngicindezele lutho. Ngizihlanganyele ngokugcwele kule micabango yezocansi, hhayi empilweni yangempela, kodwa ekhanda lami eliye labathulisa. Ngiziphoqelele ukuzibiza ngongqingili okwaletha ukukhathazeka kwezitabane. Ngifunde futhi ngabuka izindaba ezibhalwe ngabantu abebeyizitabane. Lolu hlobo lokuchayeka lubizwa ngokuthi ukwelashwa kwe-ERP okusetshenziselwa ukuqeda ukukhathazeka ezigulini ze-OCD. Ngokwenza lezi zinto, uzokwehlisa ukwesaba okuza nemicabango engathandeki. Futhi, yebo. Bebelokhu besebenza.
Njengoba kuthunyelwe kokuthunyelwe kwe-OP, le micabango ayisabangeli ukukhathazeka noma ukuvusa okukhulu. Injabulo yazo iphele cishe ngokuphelele. Ngakho-ke, yini eyaletha le njabulo kwasekuqaleni? Thatha ukuqagela. Mhlawumbe, kungenxa yokuthi ngingungqingili noma ngithanda abesilisa nabesifazane yize ngingakaze ngibe nemizwa yamadoda esikhathini esedlule. Noma, mhlawumbe kwalethwa ngokunye. Mhlawumbe okuthile engiziveze kukho kwakukusha futhi engingakaze ngikubone ngaphambili. Imvelo yami yokuzijabulisa ayizange ihlangane kahle nalokhu. Ngikhulele emndenini owamukelayo, wonke umuntu lapho ngihlala khona ukhululekile. Akukho ukucwaswa lapho ngihlala khona. Ake ngikucacise lokhu. Futhi, akumthathi umuntu ngaphezulu kweminyaka eyi-15 ukuthola ukuthi ubulili bakhe bukhanga kubuphi ubulili. Ake sibheke olunye ucwaningo olwenziwe ngezifundo ezibukeziwe zontanga nokuthi imibhalo ishintsha kanjani lapho ivezwa ezithombeni ezingcolile.
Ngesikhathi sokuvezwa okusha, i-dopamine iyithuluzi elibalulekile ekutheni lokhu kuvezwa okusha kuyinto efanele ukukulandela noma cha. I-Dopamine ikhemikhali elisebenzayo ebuchosheni bakho elikhishwa lapho sizwa injabulo. Ngesikhathi sobusha kanye nezikhathi ezibalulekile zokufunda, sivezwa izinto ezintsha lapho ingqondo yethu isabela ngendlela ehlukile. Ngemuva kweminyaka yokuphelelwa yithemba ngenxa ye-porn, i-dopamine ebuchosheni bethu izokonakala ngemuva kokubuka izinto ezintsha.
Lokhu noma kunjalo, akunjalo kuwo wonke umuntu. Ngifuna ukusungula lokho. Yingakho, unabantu abangakhuli ekusetshenzisweni kocansi, nalabo abakwenzayo. Njengabanye abantu bangaphuza ngokulinganisela, kanti abanye abantu abakwazi. Into ethokozisayo ongayifunda i-porn abesifazane abakhetha ukuyibuka. Abesifazane abaningi babika ukuthanda izithombe zobulili ezingcolile. Nayi ingxoxo encane ngayo. https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/comments/23ny9b/i_am_straight_f_25_but_only_watch_lesbian_porn/
Kukhona okuncane okungekho ocwaningweni lokuya ocansini kanye nezocansi. Njengoba konke kusha. Kodwa-ke, ngichaze nje imiphumela i-porn enayo kuwe. Mina, nabanye abantu abaningi abaye babhekana nemiphumela evela ku-porn bayazi ukuthi kunzima kanjani ukubhekana nalaba. I-porn ingabhubhisa umazisi. Izilingo ezifakiwe zikhona. Kanjani? Ziletha injabulo lapho ufuna okuthile okusha. Kepha, ngokuqhubeka kwesikhathi, abantu bababikela ukuthi baphucwa njengoba bengabangeli injabulo efanayo ababeyenza ngaphambili. Ngingakubhalisa ezinye izindatshana eziyinkulungwane ezichaza ukuthi ukukhipha i-ejaculation ne-porn kuthonya kanjani ubuchopho. Kepha, ngithemba ukuthi uzolithola iphuzu.
imithombo: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3050060/ http://psycnet.apa.org/psycinfo/1995-44134-001 http://www.pnas.org/content/100/3/1405.full https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11252991 https://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/Pfaus_Sexual_Reward_2012.pdf
Futhi, ividiyo enhle yokuhlola umlutha wezocansi owenziwe i-ASAPScience https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ya67aLaaCc
LINK - I-Porn yangenza ngicabanga ukuthi ngingumama-gay
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