Sekuphele isikhathi esingaphezu konyaka ngibuyele kule webhusayithi. Angikholwa ngenqubekela phambili esengiyenzile… Sekuyiminyaka eyi-2 nohhafu kusukela ekubukeni kwami kokugcina, nomfana, izinto sezithuthukile. Ikakhulukazi emnyangweni ongezansi. Noma kunjalo, ngizokwabelana ngamafuphi ngendaba yami bese ngikutshele bafana ukuthi injani impilo yami yansuku zonke kimi manje.
Ngaqala ukubukela ngineminyaka eyi-10 noma engu-11, futhi ngahle ngazifaka ezigabeni ezimbi kakhulu. Ngangifaka i-3-4 izikhathi ngosuku, cishe nsuku zonke, cishe iminyaka eyi-8 phakathi nempilo yami yangaphambi kobusha nentsha. Ukwenza indaba ende ibe mfushane, kwakukuhle kabi. Angizange ngisebenze emnyangweni ongezansi noma yini (i-ED eyedlulele), futhi bekungabonakali ukuxhuma nabanye abantu kahle.
Ngayeka ukubuka ekolishi, futhi ngiye ngathuthuka kancane kancane usuku nosuku kusukela ngaleso sikhathi. Kuthathe ukuphikelela okukhulu; kucishe kufane nokugijima ibanga elide. Ngaba nokuhoxiswa okubi kakhulu lapho ngishiya futhi. Ukudlulisela phambili ngokushesha namuhla, ngingakuthola ngomyalo. Ngingakhuluma nabesifazane kalula kalula, futhi izinkinga ze-ED seziphele nya !! Ngibe ku-M binge kancane, futhi kubonakala kungangilimazi kakhulu, kepha nakanjani ngibona imiphumela emibi emibi ngokuzethemba nokuzethemba, okuvame ukubuyela kokujwayelekile ngemuva kwezinsuku ezimbalwa. Ngikwenza ngokuphelele ukuzizwa, futhi noma ngikwenza kaningi ngosuku angikatholi i-ED. Kucishe kufane nokuthi ngingumuntu nje ojwayelekile manje.
Abanye benu kungenzeka ukuthi bayazibuza ukuthi umuntu ohloniphekile kufanele ahlale kanjani ne-PMO mahhala isikhathi eside. Yinye into eqinisekile: Angizange ngiyenze ngedwa. Selokhu ngayeka, ngajoyina i-Alcoholics Anonymous futhi ngabona ukuthi ngazalwa nginesifo sokuluthwa utshwala, okuyisizathu esenza ukuthi ngiyeke ukubukela isikhathi eside kakhulu. Uhlelo lwe-AA lunginike impilo efanelekile. Ngithole ukuthi ukubuka iP akuyona inkinga, yimina okuyinkinga, nokuthi ngidinga usizo. Ukubuka i-P kwakuyisibonakaliso senkinga yami, hhayi inkinga. Ngiyazi ukuthi kunabafana kule webhusayithi abalwela ukubuyela emuva njalo, behlala behla futhi bengakwazi ukuphinda bavuke. Ngiyazi ukuthi kunjani ukuba nesifiso esinamandla sokuyeka ukubuka futhi ngibuyele emuva noma kunjalo, incazelo yokwehla kwamandla emvelo okungaqondakali. Umuzwa wokungafuni ukubukela, kepha ukungakwazi ukuzivimba ekwenzeni lokho bekungumuzwa omubi kakhulu emhlabeni. Kunoma ngubani ofunda lokhu ohlushwa yile nto ye-PMO: Ngiyakukhuthaza ukuthi uye kuwebhusayithi ye-AA, ufunde Incwadi Enkulu, bese ushintsha igama elithi “Utshwala” ufake elithi “PMO”. Ishintshe impilo yami. Ngiyazi ukuthi anginamandla ngaphezu kwe-PMO'ing, futhi ngaphandle kosizo, ngigxilwe kakhulu. Ukube bengingalwenzi uhlelo lwe-AA, bengizobuka futhi. Ngiyakwazi nje.
Noma kunjalo, bafana benhlanhla! Impilo yami ingcono kakhulu namhlanje, ifanele wonke umzamo engiwenzayo. Zizwe ukhululekile ukungithumelela imiyalezo nganoma yimiphi imibuzo, ngingakujabulela ukukusiza.
LINK - I-800 + Izinsuku ze-PMO Umbiko Wenqubekela Phambili
NGU - Dominic
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