Hhayi-ke bafana, ngikwenzile. Ukuqalisa kabusha kwezinsuku ezingama-90 kwenze ucansi lwajabulisa kakhulu. Inselele yami yokuthi ngiyeke i-porn. Manje nginezinsuku ezingama-91. Ukuze nje ngiyikhiphe endleleni ngiyeke kuphela i-porn. Angikho ebudlelwaneni obuzinzile.Ngisanda kuphuma ebudlelwaneni futhi ngiphola futhi. Lokhu kube ukulungiswa okukhulu ngemva kweminyaka engu-6 LTR. Kodwa-ke, ngisecansini phakathi nalezi zinyanga ezintathu, izikhathi ezimbalwa nabantu abangu-4 abahlukene.
Ucansi lumnandi kakhulu
Ngicabanga ukuthi akukho porn kungisize kakhulu ngokuba nokushayela okuningi ezintweni eziningi. Kuhlanganisa nogqozi lwami lokuhlangana nabesifazane. Futhi, angikwazanga ukujabulela ucansi kakhulu ngaphambi kokuyeka futhi ngemva kokuyeka akuwona nje ucansi olujabulisa kakhulu. Ngiyakwazi ukwenza izinto zocansi ebengingakwazi ukuzenza isikhathi eside. Ucansi lujabulisa kakhulu ezindaweni ezahlukene, futhi ngiyakwazi ukusheshe ngifinyelele umvuthwandaba. Into eyodwa engangingakaze ngikwazi ukuyenza ngaphambili okwakuwukuba ngifinyelele kuvuthondaba nomuntu ngosuku lokuqala. Kukhona ukwanda kokuzwela kwelungu kanye ne-girth.
Manje sengiyakwazi uku-M kuya ku-O ngaphandle kokubheka u-P, okwakuyinto engangingacabangi ukuthi ngingayenza. Okungakwazanga ukwenza lokho kusukela eminyakeni yobusha. Ngineminyaka engu-41 manje. Ukulibaziseka kwe-ejaculation yinto ebengilokhu nginayo, engicabanga ukuthi iyabhebhetheka futhi mhlawumbe ibangelwa ukusetshenziswa kocansi.
Singakwazi ukwengeza isifinyezo esithi PIDE ukuze sihambisane ne-PIED? I-PIDE ihlukile ku-ED ngoba ukuhlala kanzima akuyona inkinga kodwa ukufika kuvuthondaba kuba nzima ukukufeza. Ujwayela ukuzimisa kanye nemininingwane ye-porn. Ngicabanga ukuthi ukugqama kwe-porn kukwenza ungabi namizwa ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo. Lokhu kudala umkhuba wokujaha i-dopamine wokushaya indlwabu okungapheli. Uma ukhetha isikhuthazo esibonakalayo sokushaya indlwabu uziqeqeshela ukuncika kulokho. Uma usuyikhipha kamuva, uthola ukuthi awukwazi ngisho nokushaya indlwabu ngaphandle kwayo. Izikhundla nesivinini esisebenza ngempumelelo sigxila kunethiwekhi yakho ye-neural futhi ekugcineni awukwazi ukujabulela ukuhlukahluka. Lokhu kuyadabukisa, kuzwakala sengathi uyakhawulelwa esikhundleni sokukhula njengomuntu ocansini. Kuyamcika futhi umlingani wakho futhi kumenze azizwe engavikelekile.
Ukuba umlutha wezithombe zobulili ezingcolile kufana nezinye izilutha
Ngiyazi ukuthi kukhona izingxabano mayelana nokuthi i-porn kanye nocansi zikhona noma cha ngokwengqondo efana nezidakamizwa, angisho ukuthi ngiyazi isayensi kulokhu, kodwa kunengqondo ngokwesayensi futhi ngingafakazela ngokuhlangenwe nakho ukuthi noma yimuphi umsebenzi ojabulisayo ungakha umkhuba, futhi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi leyo nto iyini inani lenjabulo oyithola kuyo iyancipha. nemvamisa. Lokho kufana nezidakamizwa nokudla. Kungakho abantu befuna okwengeziwe nangemvamisa eyengeziwe ukuze bathole imivuzo efanayo, lokhu kuyisayensi ye-dopamine eyisisekelo.
Ngakho-ke i-porn akufanele isebenze izindlela ezifanayo ze-neural njenge-crack ukuze ibe umlutha. Kwafakazelwa ukuthi ukungena othandweni kwenza ubuchopho busebenze ngendlela efanayo ne-crack. Ukulutheka kwezocansi, umlutha wothando kanye nokuba umlutha wezithombe zobulili ezingcolile akushintsheki kahle. Kodwa-ke, enye ingawela kwenye lapho eyodwa noma enye ingatholakali. Uma ulahlekelwa ukufinyelela ekubeni umlutha wakho lapho-ke kungenzeka ukuthi ukushintshe ufake okunye. Izidakamizwa ziba ne-sugar toothy ngemva kokuyeka ukwenza isibonelo.
Ngaphambi kokuyeka i-porn notshwala ngachitha izinyanga ezimbalwa ngizikhipha. Ngingasikisela ukwenza lokho. Uma "unokuphinda" mhlawumbe kulula ukukumisa kabusha njengenkathi yokulunyulwa. Lokho kungaphambi kokuthi uyeke unomphela.
Amagagasi e-anhedonia
Selokhu ngayeka angizange ngibe nezifiso ezinamandla zanoma yini, kodwa ngingumuntu ocindezelekile ngiye ngezwa amagagasi e-anhedonia. Ukuqwashisa ngokuthi i-anhedonia iyini kusiza ukuthi unganqotshwa ukuphinde ubuyele emuva ukuze nje uyisuse isigamu sehora. Ayikho indlela yokuphuma ku-anhedonia ngaphandle kwesikhathi, mhlawumbe ezinye izivivinyo zokuphefumula, ishawa ebandayo, ukusebenza kanzima, noma mhlawumbe ushokoledi omningi obangela i-oxytocin. Ngaleso sikhathi sesibuyele ezintweni njengezindlela zokubhekana nazo, ezingakusizi isikhathi eside. Kodwa ngiyavuma ukuthi ngisebenzisa ushokoledi ngokucophelela ukuze nginciphise izimpawu zami zokuhoxiswa ezenzweni ezimbi ezinamandla. Kufanele nje ngikhumbule ukuthi ngingaluthwa ushokoledi futhi. Iminyaka yami iphinde ibe nomthelela ekhonweni lokunqanda izifiso, ngenxa yokuncipha kancane kwe-libido okuza ngokwemvelo, ngakho-ke ngibashayela ihlombe abantu abancane ngokukwazi ukwenza noma yiziphi izinselelo ze-NoFap. Bekungaba nzima kakhulu kimina ukwenza njengensizwa engashadile.
Hhayi aphume ehlathini
Esihlokweni ngithi angiphumi ehlathini, Izinyanga ezintathu azikude kangako futhi lokhu ngikubona kuwukunqoba okuncane. Nakuba ngiphumelele ukuyeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ukuphuza, ukhula, ukuluma izinzipho, futhi ngathola imikhuba enempilo efana namavithamini nsuku zonke, ukujima, ukunwebeka, ukuzindla kanye nezikhathi zokufunda, ngisenezinkinga zemizwa. Ngezinye izikhathi ngisezwa i-anhedonia, futhi ngisazishaya. Ngiyohlale ngilindele lukhulu kimina kodwa, ngithemba ukuthi ngizoba umphathi wesizinda sami ngokwemizwa kanye nemikhuba. I-codependent encane. Okukhangayo futhi okuyigugu njengomuntu olinganiselayo.
Olunye lwezinsuku engangisanda kungichitha ngalo ngokuphelele, ngenxa yokuthi ucansi lwalujabulisa kakhulu futhi lumangalisa, nganamathela kakhulu futhi ngabambelela evikini elilandelayo futhi ngamethusa ngokuphelele. Izinhlelo ebesinazo zosuku lwesibili zaphonswa umoya, ngoba ngangingapholile ngokwanele futhi ngangihlanganisa umbhalo.
Ngadlula ku-rollercoaster yomzwelo engangingagwenywa ukube ngangingavikelekile kangako. Ngenhlanhla, angizange ngibuyele ezindleleni zokubhekana nezimo ezingenampilo, ngaphandle kwezinga eliyisisekelo eliyisiqalo sokusebenzisa okubi, okuwukucabanga ngokweqile, ukucabanga komhlaba wonke, kanye nokuntuleka kombono, ukwesaba okungaziwa. Ngalahlekelwa umbono wemizwa nesikhala sakhe ngoba ngangifuna ukwazi okungaziwa, ukuthi yayiyini imizwa yakhe ngami ukuze ngiqinisekiswe futhi nginciphise ukwesaba kwami nokungabaza kwami ngemva kosuku lokuqala.
Ingane elimele engqondweni yami
Angikuhlanganisi lokhu ku-porn njengesizathu, kodwa kunalokho i-porn nezinye izenzo ezimbi kwakuyizindlela zami zokubhekana nengxenye yami egcwele ukwesaba, ubuhlungu bezinkinga ezijulile zokuzethemba ezivela ebuntwaneni obunomzwangedwa, izikhathi lapho. Ngangihlukaniswe ngokwedlulele, ngivame ukuxhashazwa, ngenqatshwa, futhi ngineminyaka yokucindezeleka nokudideka ngabantu lapho ngikhula.
Sonke sinalezi zingane ezilimele ngaphakathi emiqondweni yethu ezikhalela ukunakwa bese siwakha ngamafosholo amakhemikhali ukuze ziziminze. Kufana nokunikeza ingane yakho yangaphakathi i-pacifier kodwa ingashintshi inabukeni engcolile. Uma sesiyisusile leyo mikhuba emibi singaqala sizilalele, kubuhlungu kangakanani lokho. Ngemva kwalokho singadambisa ukwesaba kwethu ngokuziqinisekisa, ngokuzihawukela, kanye nemikhuba enempilo esenza sibe namandla ngokwanele kangangokuthi ukwesaba ngeke kukwazi ukuqhuba umbukiso.
Ngokusobala ngisasebenza kulokhu, kodwa njengoba ngizibophezela ekukhuleni, ngithola ukuzethemba okwengeziwe kwakheka kancane kancane. Ngokuzayo uma ngihlangana nomuntu engimthandayo mhlawumbe ngizofika kuleyo nyanga yesibili. Phila futhi ufunde, bese uvuka uzame futhi ngolunye usuku.
Ukubaluleka kokuxhumana
Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana nomphakathi cishe kuyisizathu esiyinhloko sokulutheka. Izenzo ezimbi esizenzayo zingama-hacks wokusutha kokuncika kwamakhemikhali emvelo akhona ukuze asenze sibe nesibopho futhi siqhubeke nezinhlobo zezilwane. Wonke umuntu udinga ukuxhumana nomphakathi kanye nokusondelana, futhi inkathi yethu yesimanje yakha kabusha lonke uhlaka lwesiko nomnotho mayelana nokwenza inzuzo ngokuzanelisa ngokushesha. Izinkampani zisinika ukwaneliseka okusheshayo okusikhulula ngamakhemikhali emsebenzini onzima kakhulu wokwakha izibopho zomphakathi. Asinikezi nje imali yethu kulezi zinkampani kodwa isikhathi sethu kanye nezindawo zethu zokuhlala. Uma sikuvumela kakhulu kuba yizingane ezilahliwe ezingakwazi ukuthatha izinqumo noma isisu noma iyiphi inqubo yokuthola esikufunayo.
Izithombe zocansi zikusuthisa ngengubo yokungabadingi abantu. Abantu bangizwise ubuhlungu ngakho ngithola indlela yokungabadingi, ngasika elijikayo kwaze kwaba sekugcineni kohambo lonke lokwenza abangani, ukuthola ubufakazi bokuxhumana nabantu, ukujabulisa umuntu wesifazane nokusondelana, futhi ngimane ngizisuthise ngemicabango ecacile ucansi. Kufanele uthembele, kufanele uzame.
Nginethemba ngekusasa
Nginethemba lokuthi ezinsukwini zami ezilandelayo ezingu-90 zokuziphatha nokuzilawula ngikhululekile ezihlahleni ze-anhedonia, ngingalulama ngokushesha ekuphoxekeni, ngiphathe isikhathi sami kangcono futhi ngenze izinqumo ezinzima mayelana nendlela yami yokuphila ngokuqiniseka okwengeziwe. Ngichithe sonke isikhathi ngabe ngibuka ama-porn ngibuka amavidiyo nge-neuroscience. Isifundo sokucindezeleka, ukuphakamisa ukudlidliza kwami, izinzuzo zokuzindla, ubuBuddha be-zen, nezinye izihloko eziningi ezingisiza ukuba ngiqinise ikhono lami lokugwema imizwa yokuphelelwa ithemba ebangelwa ukuba ngiyehlukanisa futhi ngicindezelekile. Ngenxa yalokho, akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi ucansi lujabulisa kakhulu ngizizwa sengivele ngijulisa ukuxhumana nabantu engibakhathalelayo futhi ngenza ukuxhumana okusha. Lokho kuwumgomo wami omkhulu, ukuba yingxenye yalo mhlaba, ukunikela nokwamukela uthando olungapheli.
Ukuchuma.
LINK - Ukuqalisa kabusha kwezinsuku ezingama-90 kuqediwe, kodwa angiphumile ehlathini.
Ngu - u/wervil
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