Izinto zokuqeqeshwa kobuchopho-ikakhulukazi ngesikhathi sobusha
(Qaphela: Bheka imibono eminingi ngezansi kwalesi sihloko)
Kujwayelekile ukuthi izingane zifune ukufunda konke ngocansi, ikakhulukazi ngesikhathi sokuthomba nasebusheni. Yilapho ukuzala kuba yinto ephambili ebuchosheni. Ngalokhu singabonga imininingwane ethile yokukhula kwengqondo yobusha.
Cabanga ngemidlwane yasehlathini esakhula ibuka elinye iqembu ngokuthakazelisa kangangokuthi (kwezinye izinhlobo) ishiya abangane bayo, futhi ikhuthazelele ukujikijelwa nemicibisholo yokungabi nabambisene phansi komunye umkhosi — konke lokhu Ithuba ukuze uqhubeke nokushisa okungajwayelekile esikhathini esizayo. Izinto izinto zethu eziphilayo ezenzayo ukuqinisekisa ukuhlukahluka kwezakhi zofuzo!
Manje, phambela phambili kumfana osemusha ethola intsha engqondweni ye-Internet eerotica:
Ngiqale ukubuka i-Internet engi-porn lapho ngineminyaka eyi-11. Ngavele ngaboshwa, futhi ngachitha amahora amaningi ngibuka izithombe ezingcolile. Ukubona nje amabele ambalwa obala kwakwanele ukungikhipha. Kepha ukuzithemba kwasheshe kwangena, futhi ngaqala ukukhula ngamathunjana ukuze ngithole okufanayo kwi-porn. Kwaqala ngezinhlanga ezahlukahlukene, kwabe sekubizwa ngama-lesbians, kwabe sekuba yizimpophoma zamanzi, emva kwalokho kwasakazeka / kwaba yibaseli / BDSM / tranny. Futhi ke noma yikuphi ukuhlanganiswa kokungenhla ukudala i-porn egulayo engaguli. Ngikhumbula ngihleli esikoleni ngicabanga nge-porn egulayo engingayifuna ngalobo busuku.
Kuthiwani ngobuchopho bentsha okwenza isipiliyoni salomfana singavamile? Impendulo: Ngesikhathi sobusha kukhula ukungalingani kwesikhashana kwezinzwa. Ingxenye "yobulili, izidakamizwa ne-rock & roll" yobuchopho isedrive ngokweqile. Ingxenye ethi “ake sicabange lokhu” isakhiwa, futhi ngeke ifinyelele ekuvuthweni kuze kube sebudaleni.
Le iresiphi yokuziphatha okungacabangi futhi okuyingozi ihlela kabusha obunye ubuchopho besilisa obusencane futhi. Kuyindlela yokuziphendukela kwemvelo yokushayela inkululeko yokuzimela izilwane ezincelisayo eziningi ezisencane eziyidingayo njengoba zifuna abalingani futhi zibaze izindawo. Ekuhlaziyweni kwezindleko zenzuzo yobuchopho, isikali sincipha kakhulu esiqondisweni se- imivuzo engenzeka.
Kukhona okhahlela kodwa. Amandla engane yethu yokufaka izintambo ezinhlanganweni ezintsha zezocansi amakhowe cishe ayi-11 noma ayi-12. Ngalesi sikhathi amabhiliyoni wokuxhuma okusha kwe-neural (synapses) enza amathuba amaningi. Kodwa-ke, lapho esekhulile ubuchopho bakhe kufanele buthene imijikelezo yakhe ye-neural ukuze imshiye ngokulawulwa okuningana kokukhetha. Ngeminyaka engamashumi amabili, kungenzeka angabi khona ncamashi wanamathela ngezimpahla zobulili awela phakathi nesikhathi sobusha, kodwa zingafana nezimpikiswano ezijulile ebuchosheni bakhe-akulula ukuzinaki noma ukuzihlanganisa kabusha.
Izindaba zokuchayeka ngokobulili-cue okuningi ngesikhathi sobusha kunanoma yisiphi esinye isikhathi empilweni. Manje, engeza kuleli qiniso elishisayo uketshezi olukhanyayo lwendawo yanamuhla engaphandle kwodonga etholakala empompini yomunwe. Ngabe kuyamangaza yini ukuthi enye intsha ithathe unomphela intuthuko engaguquguquki ye-cyber esikhundleni sabalingani abangaba khona? Noma uthinte ukuphendula kwabo ngokocansi ezintweni ezingahlobene nalokho abakuthandayo kwezocansi? Noma uphathe ukukhubaza ubuchopho babo-futhi ungene ngaphakathi umlutha wezocansi?
Ngokweqiniso, ingabe ungumfana okhumbula ubusha bakho — nokuthi ubungeke uvuthwe ngokwanele ngaleyo minyaka? Mhlawumbe ucabanga ukuthi i-porn ye-Intanethi bekungaba yinto emisha enhle. Uma kunjalo, funda lezi zihloko ezimbili: I-Porn, Inoveli kanye nomphumela we-Coolidge futhi Porn Manje Futhi Manje: Siyakwamukela Brain Training. I-Porn, okuqukethwe kwayo, indlela ehanjiswa ngayo, nemiphumela yayo ebuchosheni ishintshe kakhulu. Kubasebenzisi banamuhla, i-orgasm eningi ingaholela ku- ukwaneliseka kancane.
Ubuchopho bentsha buhlukile ebuchosheni abadala
Lapho semba ngaphakathi ucwaningo lobuchopho kwabaselula, sasimangazwa ukuthi ubuchopho bentsha engabonakali. Izinguquko ezinkulu emvelweni wezocansi zabathinta kanzima. Nazi izinkinga ezine ezihlukile kubuni bezingane:
1. Okuqine kakhulu “Hamba uyokuthatha!” amasiginali
Ukujikeleza komvuzo kungumgogodla wawo wonke amadrayivu (kufaka phakathi i-libido), imizwa, ukuthanda, ukungathandi, ukugqugquzela… nokulutha. Ebusheni, amahomoni ezocansi ahambisa lezi zijikelezo zasendulo ziye efasiteleni lokungasebenzi kahle, okuncipha eminyakeni engamashumi amabili yokuqala. Njengentatheli UDavid Dobbs uyachaza.
Sonke sithanda izinto ezintsha nezijabulisayo, kepha asikaze sizazise kakhulu ukwedlula thina ngesikhathi sobusha. Lapha sifinyelela phezulu kulokho ososayensi bokuziphatha abakubiza ngokufuna ukuzwa: ukuzingelwa kwe-neural buzz, i-jolt yezinto ezingajwayelekile noma ezingalindelekile. … Lolu thando lokuphakama kwamadlingozi eminyakeni yobudala eyi-15.
Ukuzwela kobuchopho ku-dopamine, i- "Gotta ithole!" ama-neurochemical crests, akhuthaza ukufuna okusha, akhiphe ukulawula okuphezulu, futhi asize ukuhlanganisa ukufunda kanye nemikhuba.
Eqinisweni, ubuchopho bentsha buphendula kunoma yini ebonwa njengokuthakazelisayo kabili kuya kwesine ukuvuselelwa kokuvuselelwa kwabantu abadala ngenxa yokuzwela kwabo kwe-dopamine futhi ama-spikes amakhulu e-dopamine. Zombili izinto ezintsha kanye nokucinga / ukufuna i-spike dopamine in konke ubuchopho bomuntu, kepha amathuba e-cyber erotica angapheli afakazela ukuheha okungenakuvinjelwa kwentsha eningi.
Ngesikhathi sokuqala ngibheka lezo zithombe ezishisayo umuzwa wawubonakala ungaphandle kuleli zwe, nje kungenakwenzeka. Ngokungazelelwe ngangazi ukuthi kunento efanelekile yokuphila, konke okunye kwakunzima kakhulu, impilo yansuku zonke. Ngabaleka kulo muthi wokufakelwa: i-porn kanye nokushaya indlwabu. Kwakungavamile ukubona i-porn ngamahora ngamahora.
“Ayisebenzi?” Yebo. Intsha inamathuba amaningi okuthi ibhalise ukuvuswa kocansi, nokunye okuphezulu, njengoba okungahambi kahle, okuhlangenwe nakho okukhunjulwayo. Lokho yingakho usakhumbula imininingwane ecwebezelayo yaleyo ndawo yokuqala ephakathi. Kepha kunobunye ubufakazi bokuthi i-hypersensitivity to thrills. (Chofoza ishadi ukuze ukwandise.)
Maye, ukuzwela kwabo okuphezulu kokuthola umvuzo ngokuzenzakalelayo kunikeza intsha ukuthambekela ngokwedlulele kunokuthi uma behlangabezana nenjabulo efanayo kamuva empilweni.
2. Kunciphise ukuzwela ukuphikiswa
Sichithe uLwesihlanu ebusuku sidlala i- "World of Warcraft" kuze kube ngu-4AM, ngenkathi sigeza izingcezu eziyisishiyagalombili ze-pizza nesikhwama seDorritos esinamaphakethe ayisithupha we-Mountain Dew, iqhawe lethu likulungele ukukwenza konke futhi ngoMgqibelo ebusuku. Ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi intsha kunciphise kancane ngezimpawu zokudlula. Ukuvuthwa kuwumsebenzi wokubuyisela umvuzo, futhi intsha ingakwazi ukuphatha amanzi amaningi ngaphambi kokuba i-circuits ilayishwe ngaphezulu
Ngaso sonke isikhathi uyazibuza ukuthi kungani Ama-Slasher + Teens (ubulili)2 = Ibhokisi le-Summer-Office Hit? Konke kufika phansi ezimangalisweni zika ubuchopho. Akumangalisi ukuthi izithombe zobulili ezingcolile abantu abadala abazithola zishaqisa, zithi “eeeew,” noma zinobudlova, zibhalise njengezithokozisa intsha ngokungajwayelekile. Futhi khumbula ukuthi intsha ayikwazi ukuthatha ezinye imizwa yabantu ukucabanga (ngisho nabadlali ababi).
Ngesikhathi ngingu-14/15 ngahlangana nezocansi [zobulili obufanayo] ngenkathi ngivula i-Intanethi. Ngisayikhumbula imidwebo yesikhangiso. Okuthile kuvele kwagqashuka ebuchosheni bami be-pubescent. Zonke izithombe zobulili ezingcolile eziqondile nezingungqingili engangizibuke iminyaka eminingana zazibonakala zijwayelekile. Inhliziyo yami yaqala ukugijima. Ikhanda lami laliduma, nokwesaba ukubanjwa… hhayi nje ukubukela izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, kodwa ukubukela lokho abanye ababengakubheka njenge-100% ye-porn eqondile… kwenza konke kwaba ukukhumbuleka kalula. Namuhla ngikhumbula ngikhala emva kokuqeda. Bengingazi ukuthi yini eze kimi. Ngangesaba kakhulu ngangifuna ukusonga ngibe yibhola ekamelweni lami. Kepha angiyekanga ukuyibuka. Ngangisakhangwa amantombazane, kodwa nge-porn [transexual], ngangikwazi ukukhipha i-orgasm ngokushesha.
3. “Yeka!” amasiginali
Ama-hormone ezocansi aqala ukuzwela kwentsha kumnandi ngeshwa awenzi lutho ukusheshisa ukukhula kwesikhungo sabo sokuzithiba kwengqondo. Ingqondo yentsha ifana nemoto entsha enenjini yeFerrari kanye namabhuleki eFord Pinto.
Ngesikhathi sokuthomba, "i-accelerator" esebenza ngokweqile iza ku-inthanethi: indlela yokugqugquzela imizwa yobuchopho, noma umvuzo womjikelezo, ongaphansi kwecortex enengqondo. It kwehlula “amabhuleki, ”I-“ CEO ”yobuchopho noma i-prefrontal cortex ebunzini, engeke ivuthwe ngokuphelele iminyaka eyishumi. Lesi sakamuva sihlola ubungozi, sicabange kusengaphambili, sikhethe okuhamba phambili, sinikeze ukunakekela futhi silawule izinkanuko.
Ngesikhathi esifanayo, intsha ivame ukusekela izinqumo zabo izifiso zomzwelo ngokungafani nokucabanga noma ukuhlela. Kamuva, lapho i-prefrontal cortex ivuthwa, kuzoba nezikhathi ezimbalwa “Angikholwa ukuthi ukwenzile lokho” izikhathi. Intsha yenza izahlulelo ezizwakala kahle futhi ilinganise imizwa, ihlele futhi ikhumbule kahle.
Okwamanje, intsha inenkinga yokubona imiphumela "yokukufuna". Futhi, lokhu akuyona ingozi. Ukuthambekela kwe-Daredevil ngesikhathi sobusha bakhonza izinhlobo zezinto eziphilayo okufanele zithathe izingozi ukuze zizishayele zona noma zithole abalingani. Endabeni yabantu abasakhula, ukuziphendukela kwemvelo bekungekho nje isikhathi sokuzivumelanisa nezingozi zezidakamizwa zokuzijabulisa, izimoto ezisheshayo, noma ukusetshenziswa ngokweqile kokudla okungenamsoco, ukugembula ku-inthanethi noma i-porn ye-Intanethi. Yingakho sinemiklomelo yeDarwin.
4. Ukusika ngokugcwele kulo lonke ubusha
Kulungile, phakathi kweminyaka engu-10 no-13, a isikhathi esibucayi sokuthuthukiswa, thina bantu sibheke ekuziphatheni okuhambisana nobulili obufanele. Sifunda ukuthi singadlala kanjani futhi sixhumane nabalingani abangenzeka. Lokhu kubaluleke kakhulu ngoba ngesikhathi sobusha ubuchopho bethu buzenza ngokwabo ukwenza imisebenzi yethu ejwayelekile kanye namaphethini okucabangela asebenze kahle. Ukuze sifeze lokhu, ubuchopho bethu buqeda ngempela ukuxhumana okungasetshenziswanga kwe-neural, kuyilapho kuqiniswa abanye.
Akumangalisi ukuthi ukushintshashintsha kwemizwa kuwuphawu lokuthomba! Ngokubambisana, izakhi zofuzo nemvelo kubumba ubumba lwecortex yangaphambilini yentsha. Njengoba ukusetshenziswa-noma-noma-ukulahleka-kuqhubeka, ubuchopho buzihlela kabusha futhi buzihlelele ngokwabo:
Imifula ye-cortex ishiya amasiphayithi amancane asetshenzisiwe, kuyilapho eqinisa kahle izindlela ezihamba phambili ze-neural. Ama-axon cell e-Nerve emigwaqweni ethandekayo ahlehliswa kangcono ne-myelin, okwandisa ijubane lezimvo zesisindo. Amagatsha amancane athola imiyalezo (ebizwa ngokuthi ama-dendrites) akhula njengemivini ukuzwa kangcono isignali engenayo. Ukuxhuma phakathi kwe-axons ne-dendrite (i-synapses) yanda kuma-circuits aqinile futhi ichithekile kulabo ababuthakathaka. Ekupheleni unezinkumbulo, amakhono, imikhuba, izintandokazi nezindlela zokubhekana nazo ezima ukuhlolwa kwesikhathi. (ibid., iDobbs, ukugcizelelwa kwengezwe)
Emibhalweni encane ekhanyayo, sinciphisa izinketho zethu-ngaphandle kokuqaphela ukuthi ukhetho lwethu olubucayi lwaluphi ngesikhathi sokukhula kwethu kokugcina, kwe-pubescent, neuronal. Ngokusho komcwaningi Jay Giedd, (Bheka le nkulumo - I-Teenage Brain: UDkt. Jay Giedd weNational Institute of Health Mental nguJay Giedd)
Uma osemusha enza umculo noma ezemidlalo noma izifundiswa, lawo ngamaseli nokuxhumana okuzobe kusebenze kanzima. Uma belele kusofa noma bedlala imidlalo yevidiyo noma i-MTV [noma i-Internet porn], lawo ngamaseli nokuxhumana okuzosinda.
Lesi ngesinye sezizathu zokuthi ukuvota kubuze intsha ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn kwe-Intanethi kuyithinta kanjani akunakwenzeka ukuthi iveze ubukhulu bemiphumela ye-porn. Izingane ezingakaze zishaye indlwabu ngaphandle kocansi azazi ukuthi zibathinta kanjani. (Kufana nokubabuza, “Ukuba ngowesilisa kukuthinte kanjani wena?”) Akukho abangakuqhathanisa nakho. Khumbula ukuthi abasebenzisi be-porn asebekhulile kaningi abaxhumi izimpawu zabo ezihlobene nocansi nokusetshenziswa kocansi okunzima-noma ngabe bakhula ukuhlukumeza ngokocansi okubangelwa ucansi (PISD). I-Porn ihlale ibonakala ngathi "ikhambi," ngoba noma bengakwazi ukuyikhuphula ukuya ocansini, imvamisa bangayithola uma bebuka i-porn eyanele ngokweqile. Singalindela ukuthi intsha ikuthole?
Inkinga efanayo ngokubabuza ngemiphumela ye-porn kwimood. Abasebenzisi bahlala "bezizwa bengcono" lapho besebenzisa, noma ngabe basebenzisa kakhulu, i zimbi nakakhulu jikelele. Ngakho kungani ubonwayo bungabonwa njengenkinga? Ngaphezu kwalokho, uma abasebenzisi bezama ukuyeka, ngezinye izikhathi babhekene nezinsuku zokuqeda izimpawu ezinkulu, ngakho-ke ukulawula ukusetshenziswa kungaphazamiseka inkinga esikhundleni sesisombululo.
Iqiniso ukuthi, abasebenzisi abasindayo kakhulu abazoshaya udonga kusuka ngokweqile, abakwenzi lokho kuze kube yiminyaka engamashumi amabili — cishe ngesikhathi lapho izifunda zabo zemiklomelo zinciphise ukuzwela kwazo. Isibonelo, ngokuba mdala, ama-dopamine receptors kumasekethe womvuzo ancipha kancane nge-a yesithathu noma isigamu. Manje, izinjabulo azithandeki kangako, futhi nemiphumela yokudlulela ngokweqile iyaphazamisa kakhulu. Lapho unyawo lwemvelo selucishiwe ku-accelerator yomvuzo, sekuyisikhathi sokuthi umzingeli-mqoqi ahlale phansi futhi akhulise abanye abancane.
Azikho izinyoni noma izinyosi, amaphikseli nje sicela
Phakathi naleso sikhathi, ubuchopho bentsha zivuthiwe isiphepho esiphelele njengokuzingelwa kofuzo kwezinto ezintsha kanye nokushayisana okungalindelekile ne-erotica engapheli ye-Intanethi. I-Web-surfing ye-Hypnotic-engadingi mzamo kodwa ukuskrola nokuqamba — ithatha indawo yokushiya isizwe sakithi ifune i-savanna ukuthola abalingani abavundile.
Lapho ngineminyaka engu-18, ngaya ocansini okokuqala ngqa. Lapho ethi "uphansi yonke indlela", ngagijimela esitolo esiseduze ngiyolanda amakhondomu sengathi ngangiXoshwa nguMvuni. Ngemuva kwesenzo, imicabango yami ibithi, “Hmm… ayizwanga yehlukile kangako ekushayeni indlwabu, futhi ibidinga isihogo somsebenzi omningi! UMeh, ngizonamathela ezithombeni ezingcolile futhi angizihluphi ngentombi. ”
Omunye umfana waphendula,
Imicabango yami NGEMPELA. Ubuhlungu nje emuva, ubunzima bemisipha, ukuphefumula, ukujuluka nokukhathazeka kokusebenza. UKUNCINDEZELA okuncane kokuqhekeka okukodwa nje, futhi uthole i-'Iron Fist' yakho ekukhipha kangcono kunaleso sangasese sangempela. Akugcini lapho, uhlala uthola 'ukubukwa okuhle' 'nentombi yezocansi.' Ungayibona yonke leyo migqa yomzimba emihle ngokukhanyisa okuhle, amabele n 'butts n' amathanga abukeka ekhazimula, futhi * abonakala njalo. Empilweni yangempela lokho akuvamile ukwenzeka. Isikhathi sokuqala lapho ngakwenza khona, angizange ngikuthokozele ngempela (yize sobabili safika okuningi). Isikhathi sami sokuqala bekufanele ngabe ngizizwa ngingu-TRIUMPH, kunikezwe ukuthi 'iphumelele' kanjani, kepha kwazizwa kungenzi lutho. Ngaleso sikhathi ngase ngiya khona kukhona mhlawumbe okuthile okungahambi kahle. Ubulili engqondweni yami bebukeka buhle futhi bujabulisayo. I-sex * yangempela engangiyenayo kwakuyizimboni ezinkulu futhi ezingenayo. Akukuhle.
Intsha yanamuhla kwesinye isikhathi ifaka ucingo lwayo ekuvuseleleni izithombe ezingcolile zobulili ezingcolile ze-Intanethi isikhathi esingangeminyaka eyishumi ngaphambi kokuba zizame ukuxhumana nabalingani bangempela. (Bheka amakhasi we- ukuzibika Ukusetshenziswa kocansi kobusha.) Lesi simo siyingozi kakhulu uma ukuphishekela okungenacala kwama-jollies kwentsha kuholele ekushintsheni kobuchopho okuyisisekelo, okungukuthi, Ukuba umlutha wezithombe. Futhi, intsha ikhona Okuningi banokudakwa ngokweqile kunabantu abadala, ngenxa yomvuzo wabo wokushisa okungahambi kahle kanye nokulawulwa kwesigungu esiphezulu.
Inhlekelele enhle
Okubaluleke nakakhulu, ngenkathi igxiliwe esikrinini sakhe (ama), insizwa encane ikhona hhayi ukufunda amakhono okuthandana. Ngokufanelekile, akasebenzisi isikhathi ezungeze abangane bangempela bomshado — yona kanye imisebenzi eye yavela ebusheni bomsuka. Ingqondo yakhe hhayi ukuncoma ubulili bakhe ngokudlala ngothando, ama-pheromones noma abalingani abathathu abalingani bokulingana okuvamile okuhlinzeka ngokufanisa okuvamile. Ezinsukwini ezidlulile, izinsizwa ezesabekayo zaqhuma nge-one-on-one, i-vanilla ngocansi ngaphambi kokuqeda i-kama sutra. Manje, intombazane eneminyaka engu-17 ubudala iqala ukuqala ngothando lwakhe lokuqala njengoba ehilela abangane bakhe ababili, izingodo, i-strap-gear kanye nesamba esikhulu se-lube.
Futhi ngeke iqhawe lethu likwazi ukuchazela umngane othandekayo ozayo ukuthi ukuntuleka kwakhe okubonakalayo kunesibindi, ukulungiswa kwakhe kanye nokukhwabanisa ikhondomu, noma ukuzama kwakhe ukuzama ukuhlala kanzima ngokucabanga ngakho ukubukela umuntu enza ucansi. Akanalo ulwazi lokuthi kungani engaphenduli, noma ukuthi angawenza kanjani ukulungisa umonakalo. Nontanga yakhe.
Ngiyesaba impela ukuthi njengoba bonke ubuchopho bami bazi ukubuka izithombe ezingcolile (lezi yizona kuphela iziwombe ezimbili engike ngaba nazo, futhi zombili zehlulekile ngokuphelele) ukuthi ngonakalise ubuchopho bami soooooo kakhulu ukuthi angisoze ngibe ngcono. Ngisho, konke okuhlangenwe nakho kwami kocansi kusukela ebusheni bami kuvela ku-porn. Eminyakeni eyakha kakhulu empilweni yami, bengilokhu ngithandana nocansi. Yilokho kuphela ubuchopho bami obaziyo. Ngabe ngiyokwazi ukuyivusa nowesifazane ojwayelekile? Ngabe ngiyoke ngikhangwe ngumuntu wesifazane ojwayelekile ngendlela engikhanga ngayo kulawo mapikseli asekhompyutheni yekhompyutha? Nginovalo impela lokuthi ngiziphazamise ngokuphelele. Ngingashintsha?
Maye, abangane bomshado abaningi badideke kakhulu noma balimale kakhulu ukuba bangazindela ezimweni ezidumaza kangaka. Umphumela wokukhathazeka ngokusebenza wenza isimo seqhawe lethu sibe sibi kakhulu. Ngabe lokhu kungachaza ukuthi kungani amaphesenti ama-36 abafana abancane baseJapan namaphesenti ama-20 abantu abasha baseFrance abanawo akukho nesithakazelo kubalingani bangempela? Noma kungani amazinga okuzithiba eMelika ziyanda?
Namuhla, izindlela zomuntu oneminyaka engu-13 zobulili ziqoshwe nge-hardcore porn, amawindi amaningi, nokuchofoza njalo. Ngokuphambene nalokho, ubaba wakhula waba ngumakhelwane kaSally kanye nomcabango wakhe ovundile. Ekuqaleni, samangala ukubona abanye abayimilutha yezocansi bekhulile belulama ku-PISD (ukukhubazeka kocansi okubangelwa ucansi) ngokushesha okukhulu kunentsha. Ngabe kungenxa yokuthi amashumi amathathu- namashumi amane-ama-somethings ayesungule kahle izindlela zobuchopho eziphathelene nokuxhumana nabalingani bangempela kusuka ezinsukwini zangaphambi kwe-Intanethi? Uyacelwa ukuthi ubuke le nkulumo kaSepthemba 2015 TEDx yensizwa edinga isikhathi esingeziwe futhi ibuye ibuye / iphinde ibuye ukuze inqobe i-ED eyenziwe nge-porn kanye ne-anorgasmia:
Izindaba ezimnandi ukuthi ubuchopho bugcina i-plasticity ethile nangemva kweminyaka yobusha. Lapho umfana eyeka ukusebenzisa izindlela zokwenziwa ngokocansi (noma ukuzicabangela) izinyanga ze-2-3, ukubuyiswa komvuzo wokuthola ubuchopho bakhe kuqala 'ukubheka nxazonke' ngezimpawu zocansi eziguquke ukuzithola. Ngemuva kwakho konke, okubaluleke kakhulu ukudlulisa izakhi zofuzo, ngakho-ke ifuna isenzo. Kancane kancane ifaka izintambo izifunda ze-neuronal zezinkomba zemvelo ngokuqinile esikhungweni senjabulo sobuchopho. Intombazane yakwamakhelwane ibukeka inentshisekelo.
Uthi umfana oneminyaka engu-21 oneminyaka engu-3 ngemuva kokuyeka izithombe zocansi / ukushaya indlwabu:
Ngikhumbula ngithi entombini yami, phakathi nezinsuku zami ezimbi kakhulu zokusetshenziswa kocansi nokukhubazeka kwe-erectile okuhlobene nocansi, ukuthi akuzange kube sengathi ngiye ocansini okwamanje. Wayengaqondi kahle, futhi angikwazanga ukuzichaza. Kepha izolo ebusuku, i-OMG izwakale kamnandi kakhulu. Ngangizwa yonke into, futhi kwakukuhle. Ukuzwela kwami kwe-penile kwandise imithwalo. Ngokokuqala ngqa empilweni yami, kuba sengathi ngilahlekelwe ubuntombi bami.
Omunye umfana:
[Kwangamashumi amabili okuqala] Usuku lwe-43 manje, ngibona intombazane njengomsuka wokuvusa kwami manje, kunokuba ngimbonise njengesithombe engingasigcina ukuze usebenzise kamuva. Ngibona intombazane eshisayo manje bese ngicabanga ukuthi 'Yilokho engikufunayo', bese uzama ukuthatha izinyathelo zokumhlangabeza. Kube ukuphenya kancane kancane kweswishi. Cishe cishe ngingu-90% lapho, kepha ngiyakhumbula ngingu-10%, 20% njll.
Namuhla, isilinganiso samaNtshonalanga asemancane basuke benomkhuhlane ukuhlakulela uxhumano lwe-neuronal phakathi kwazo zonke izinhlobo ze-porn ze-Intanethi nempendulo yabo yezocansi. Ngeke sisakwazi ukuthatha kalula ukuthi ukuvuswa kwentsha kuvela kokunye okuyimfihlo, komuntu ngamunye, okungashintshi, okuyisisekelo sobunikazi bobulili. Ngenxa yesifiso sobuchopho bengane esingapheli sokufuna ukukhulula isithukuthezi somnikazi waso, enye intsha ikwazi ukufaka izintandokazi zocansi ezibangela ukuthi zingabaze ukuziphatha ngokocansi okuyisisekelo.
Izigcawu ezimbalwa
Ubusha yisikhathi esiyingqayizivele sokukhula kobuchopho. Endaweni elungile, iyasebenza kakhulu futhi iyaguquguquka. Kungakhathaleki ukuthi intsha engabazingeli-abaqoqi yayizimisele kangakanani ukufuna izinjabulo, futhi yayifana nabashayeli bezimoto ezihamba phambili. Babenamathuba ambalwa okufaka ukuphendula kwabo ngocansi kunoma yini engale kwezindawo ezishisayo ezingomakhelwane.
Ubuchopho bezingane zanamuhla bufisa ngokulinganayo, nokho bajabule ngokuvusa inkanuko evusa inkinobho yazo zonke: izinkanuko zobusha, ukujabulela izinto ezishaqisayo, amandla okudlula ukusutha okujwayelekile, kanye nesifiso semfundo yezocansi nge-cachet "yabantu abadala".
Abantu abadala bavame ukucabanga ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kocansi kwe-Intanethi akulimazi ngoba "i-porn kudala yaba khona." Kepha bangaki abesilisa abazalwa, bathi, e1960 baqala ukusebenzisa i-porn nsuku zonke cishe ngo-1973? Ikakhulukazi i-hard-core, inoveli engapheli Izithombe ezingcolile zikhona manje?
Izingane zanamuhla azikwazi ukuzibamba ngokwazo:
Sekuyiminyaka, kusukela ngineminyaka engu-11 ubudala, bengilokhu ngibheka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile nokushaya indlwabu. Angikwazi ukumelana nayo futhi ngikwenza kakhulu manje. Ngifuna ukuyimisa manje. Ngineminyaka engu-15 ubudala futhi ngifuna ukukuyeka ngoba ngicabanga ukuthi kuthinta impilo yami yezenhlalo, ubudlelwano, namamaki esikoleni. Ngima kanjani?
Abantu abadala futhi bavame ukucabanga ukuthi izingane zizoshiya ngokwemvelo isimilo lapho sezikhulile. Ngempela, ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi izingane ezineminyaka yobudala basekolishi zivame ukudlula ukuphuza ngokweqile, ukusetshenziswa kwebhodlela, njll. Noma kunjalo, imikhuba yezocansi ye-Intanethi ingahluka. Ngabe abantu abadala abangaphansi kokusebenzisa kabi izidakamizwa baqale ukusebenzisa ukuphuza / ibhodlela nsuku zonke lapho beneminyaka eyi-11?
[Ubudala 35] Lapho ngiseminyakeni engaphansi kweyishumi nambili futhi umama wami ayesiyisa emtatsheni wezincwadi, ngangishesha ngithole inoveli evusa inkanuko. Ukukhuluma / incazelo yowesifazane nje kungenza ngihambe. Nkulunkulu, ngilangazelela kanjani lezo zinsuku futhi i-LOL. Namuhla, ungathola 'ukuxoshwa' ku-porn. Ezigabeni zokuqala bekuyinto entsha futhi kunzima ukuyibamba. Eminyakeni embalwa edlule, i-porn ihlala itholakala empompini. Manje sekudingeka kunokuba kujabulise / umvuzo. Kubuhlungu kanjani lokho? Anginakho ukuphikisana nokuziphatha okuhle kwe-porn. Empeleni kuphambene impela, kepha uma ufika esifundazweni sami, akusekho okuqondile, kuyiphiksi enkulu nje. Ihange elikhulu, elinonile entanyeni yami.
Khumbula, ukufunda ukuphuza ngokweqile noma ukukhuphukela phezulu akuyona into ebalulekile yokuziphendukela kwemvelo ebuchosheni; ukuzala kuyinto. Imikhuba yokudla ingaba ukufanisa okungcono. Ngabe izingane ezineminyaka engama-22 zishintsha ngokungazelelwe ukukhetha kwazo okwejwayelekile kokudla? Manje njengoba ukudla okungenamsoco kutholakala yonke indawo, abantu abadala baseMelika abahlanu kwabayisihlanu bakhuluphele ngokweqile. Cishe uhhafu walabo abakhuluphele (okusho ukuthi, uxhunywe ekudleni). Ingabe bayakushintsha ukuthanda kwabo okugxilile kwezocansi? Mhlawumbe hhayi ngaphandle kokuthi bashaye udonga lwe-PISD.
Imiphumela yesikhathi eside
Ngokusobala, ukubuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile ze-Intanethi kusukela esemncane akusho ukuthi umsebenzisi uzogcina ephambukile. Noma ocansini kakhulu, noma onodlame kakhulu kubalingani. Yize abanye bengakholelwa ukuthi kuyinto ejwayelekile ukuthi abalingani bobulili bajabulele "ama-facial" ngenkathi begcwalisa zonke izinto ngezinto. Ngeshwa, noma kunjalo, iphesenti labasebenzisi lizogcina selilutha. Futhi lelo phesenti lingaphakama kunalokho esicabanga, uma kubhekwa amazinga okulutha kwe-Intanethi asevele ethinta intsha. Amanani angama-6-18%, kuya ngokuthi i-Italy, China noma iHungary ilwenzile yini lolu cwaningo.
Kwabaningi, imiphumela eqhubekayo yokusetshenziswa kwe-porn eyeyingozi ye-intanethi cishe iyofana nemiphumela kuma-gamers ase-intanethi. Ukuchithwa kwemvelo kushiya ebuchosheni nge-a isidingo sokuvuselela okukhulu (ngaphandle uma kubuyiselwa ngokuzwakalayo ubuzwe obuvamile). Eminye imisebenzi ibonakala ibangele uma iqhathaniswa. Kule nkulumo emfushane ye-TED, I-Demise of Guys? Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo esidumile uPhilip Zimbardo sichaza imiphumela emibi “yokuluthwa” okuvamile.
Imiphumela enjalo ithinta ubudlelwano. Intukuthelo ehlala njalo ingenye yezizathu eziyinhloko ze-Internet i-Internet iyinhlangano ephakeme yezobuchopho. Ukuqeqeshwa kobuhle okuthembela kulo intsha njenge-aphrodisiac kungabonisa abasebenzisi ukuthi labo abalingani abajwayele ukulahlekelwa ukushisa-ukuvala abasebenzisi abathintekayo kuya ezingeni elijulile. Futhi, izici ezingezona izingqungquthela zobulili (ukuxhumana kwesikhumba kuya kwesikhumba, ukumanga, ukudonsa okududuzayo, ukuziphatha okudlalayo, njll) kungase kungavamile futhi kungabonakali ukuze ubhalise njengenzuzo ejabulisayo. Ngeshwa, lezi yizona eziziphatha kakhulu ezithobisa ubuchopho nokusiza imibhangqwana iqinisa izibopho zabo.
Umuntu wokuqala - Mhlawumbe kungukukhululeka nobuntofontofo bokuhlala nje phambi kwekhompyutha yami ngigxumela ezithombeni engingafanele ngizijabulise. Ngingahamba ngejubane lami futhi angidingi ukukhathazeka ngazo. Ukuba nentombazane yangempela embhedeni wami kungiphazamisa.
Umfana wesibili - angisebenzisi i-porn, kepha ngihamba nomlando wami wezithombe, ngiyabona ukuthi kwesinye isikhathi ngibheka izinkulungwane zezithombe ngehora. Ngifuna leyo ntombazane elungile noma isithombe [esingenza ngifinyelele kuvuthondaba]. I-Porn akuyona into ehlukumeza ukuphendula kwami ngokocansi; Ngicabanga ukuthi i-Internet yami enkulu yabafazi.
I-Brain plasticity education
Mhlawumbe akekho umuntu okufanele akhululwe emhlabeni namuhla ngaphandle kwemfundo ephelele ngemijikelezo yomvuzo wobuchopho kanye nayo ukukhubazeka okuyingqayizivele ngesikhathi sokukhula. Yilapho ihlaselwa ngokudla okungenamsoco, izidakamizwa, imidlalo yevidiyo, ama-i-Phones kanye ne-online erotica. Kungani ungafundisi izingane isayensi eyenziwe lula ngemuva kwemiphumela engaba khona yesikhuthazo esibi ebuchosheni? (Bhekisisani Izinto Ongazazi Nge-Porn, ukuze uthole imibono efanelekayo ye-10-13-ubudala ubudala.)
Namuhla, intsha ingakwazi (futhi yenze) ukufaka izingqondo zayo kuma-caricature angahleliwe amadlozi okhokho babo abangakaze bacabange, ingasaphathwa eyokubukwa ngokucophelela iminyaka ngaphambi kokukhwelana. Abasebenzisi bangazi ukuthi i-cartoonish ye-2-D yezithombe zobulili ezingcolile cishe ayinangqondo njengoSanta. Kodwa-ke labo abafaka ucingo lwabo ngokungaqondile amandla abo okuvuthwa kwezindikimba zocansi ze-gonzo kwesinye isikhathi bayethuka. Abaningi bayesaba ukucela usizo ngoba bacabanga ukuthi bangamambuka angenathemba. Abanye baze bazibulale.
Abeluleki abangawuqondi umehluko phakathi kokuziphatha okuyisisekelo kocansi nokutholwa ngokungahleliwe, ukuthanda kwepulasitiki kungakhuphula i-angst yentsha. Ngokudabukisayo, bambalwa ochwepheshe abazi ngokwanele mayelana nobuchopho beplastiki ukusiza izingane zibuyele, okuholela kwezinye iseluleko esibuhlungu. (bona - Abasebenzisi abasha abasha abadinga usizo olude ukuze babuyisele uMojo wabo)
Njengoba ubuchopho be-pubescent buzoqala ukujoyina ukuthanda izinto zobulili noma kunjalo, nikeza abantwana amaqiniso kanye nokwaziswa okucacile abafuna-ngaphandle kwezimo ezingenakwenzeka lapho abenzi bezithombe zobulili ezingcolile kufanele bathembele ukuheha ababukeli abanezinkinga zabo i-numb numb ukuzithokozisa izinjabulo zocansi. Fundisa izingane umehluko phakathi kokuzibandakanya ngokocansi kanye nokuthandwa kocansi, futhi ukuthi lababili bangasakaza kanjani ukuvumelanisa nokusetshenziswa okuvamile kokugqugquzela okukhulu. Futhi, bafundise ukuziphatha-izimpawu zokulutha umlutha ukubuka, futhi indlela yokuguqula lezo zinguquko.
[Ubudala be-17 bufike ngezindlela ezibuthakathaka, futhi besabonisa izimpawu ezilinganiselwe zempilo ye-erectile ngeSuku 50 lokunganaki i-porn / ukushaya indlwabu] Usuku lwama-76: Ukuzizwa umuhle, ujabulile futhi unamandla futhi unendlela yokwenza i-libido. Ukhuni lwami lwasekuseni namhlanje lwalungenangqondo — empeleni lwalungeke lwehle okwemizuzu engu-20 ngisho nokusukuma! Ngizoyinikeza izinsuku ezingama-90 ngakho-ke sengenze izinyanga ezigcwele ze-3 bese kufanele ngibuyele kokujwayelekile futhi ngilungele ukuzama ukuthola umlingani. Ngakho-ke ukukhululeka lokhu kuyasebenza.
Ngingu-27 futhi nginemfundo yesayensi neyezokwelapha, futhi ngikholelwa ngokuqinile ukuthi lo mbono wobuchopho be-plasticity mayelana ne-porn ye-Intanethi udinga ukuphuma laphaya. Silahlekelwa yithuba lokufundisa izinsizwa ezinezinkinga zomzimba ngaphakathi kobuchopho bazo. Ngokuyisisekelo, ngifisa ukuthi ngabe ngafunda ngalokhu eminyakeni eyi-15 edlule.
ISIPHUMA SESICELO
Lokhu okuthunyelwe kuthola umqondo wokuthi kungani uJohnny kungafanele asebenzise i-porn ngesikhathi sobusha
Ngiqale ukukhathazeka ngina-15 futhi ngaqala ukubuka i-porn ngineminyaka eyi-16.
Bengilokhu ngiyibuka futhi ngigijimisana nayo ngokungaguquguquki kusukela lapho, eminyakeni eyisi-7 eyedlule.
Eminyakeni embalwa edlule ngazama / r / nofap pretty obsessively, ngakho ngathola / r / izithombe ezingcolile futhi ngabona ukuthi leyo kwakuyinkinga ebaluleke kakhulu; ngemuva kwalokho, ngaba i-anti-porn kakhulu, ngenkathi ngangingakwazi ukugubha lo mkhuba-yize nganginezinyanga ezi-6 ezihlanzekile, ngangihlala ngibuya njalo.
Sekuyisikhathi eside, kuze kube manje empilweni yami endala, ngibonakalisa njenge / r / ngaphambili, futhi icishe i / r / incel, noma kungenjalo kulokho okweqisa. Inhlanganisela yokukhathazeka ngomphakathi, ukudangala kanye nezinkinga ezinkulu zokuzithemba kanye nokuzithemba kwabangela kimi ukuthi ngibe nesizungu kakhulu, ngokwesaba, ukuzenyanya, ukucasuka, umona, futhi ngezinye izikhathi ukuzilimaza komuntu osemdala.
Lokho kwakungukuphila kwami, lokho kwakungukuthi ngingubani, futhi yilokho engangiyoba khona kuze kube usuku engafa ngalo, mhlawumbe phakathi neminyaka emihlanu noma leminyaka elandelayo lapho ngizoqeda isibindi sokuzibulala ngesikhumba esisheshayo, esikhundleni senqubo encane yokuphuza nokuzihlambalaza futhi ukwenqaba ukuzinakekela mina.
Ngemva kwezinyanga ezintathu ezedlule, ngaphandle kwalapho, le ntombazane yabonisa empilweni yami eyashintsha konke.
Manje sengilashwa kabili ngesonto, ngifunda ukuthanda nokuzamukela, nginempilo yomphakathi, futhi ngiqinisekile ukuthi ngithandana nalo wesifazane. Umdala kunami ngeminyaka engu-12 kodwa akubonakali sengathi unjalo. Uziphatha njengomncane, ubukeka emncane. Futhi ungitshele ukuthi ngibukeka futhi ngenza izinto ezindala kunabafana abaningi abangontanga yami. Saba abangane ngokushesha futhi ngokushesha saba ngabalingani abanesibopho esingokomzwelo esijulile. Sobabili sibhekane nobunzima futhi sobabili sifunde ukubhekana nakho ngezindlela ezihlukile. Ungikhombisile ukuthi ngenza impilo ngokungalungile nokuthi ukuphila KUNGABA yinto ejulile egcwele injabulo, isimanga, ukudideka, injabulo, nobuhlungu nokuhlupheka ngezikhathi ezithile kodwa okungenakugwemeka. Angisafuni ukufa. Ngifuna ukuhlala, futhi ngifuna ukujabulela impilo naye.
Kepha lolo daba oludala engazakhela lona eminyakeni edlule… alusekho. Kusekhona namanje, futhi kuyangidla. Angidingi ukukuchazela nina bantu ukuthi izithombe zobulili ezingcolile zibuqede kanjani ubuchopho bami, ngemuva kokuncishwa ukusondelana nokuxhumana ngokomzimba eminyakeni yokuqala ye-23 yempilo yami, ngoba nonke niyazi ukuthi kusebenza kanjani. Bengazi, ekujuleni kwenhliziyo, ukuthi bekuphambanisa nombono wami, kukuhlanekezela futhi kukuhlanekezela nxazonke kube ukwakheka okungaziwa, kepha kuthathe ekugcineni ukulahlekelwa ubuntombi bami, kulo muntu engikukhathalelayo ngokujulile futhi angikhethwe nje kuphela ngokomzimba, kodwa ngokomzwelo, ukuqonda ngokugcwele ukuthi unembeza wami wonakaliswe kanjani eminyakeni ye-porn ye-intanethi.
Ukukhathazeka kwami okukhulu ngokulahlekelwa yi-v-card ukuthi ngizoqeda ngokushesha okukhulu. Okuphambene kwakuyiqiniso. Angikwazanga ukuqeda, nhlobo. Bekumele ngiyenze ngokwami. Wayephole ngokuphelele ngayo, futhi wayeqonda, ngoba wayazi ukuthi ukuhamba yedwa kwakuyinto engangijwayele ukuyenza, kepha akazi ukuthi kujule kangakanani. Ngikhangwa nguye ngokujwayelekile, lapho egqokile, kepha lapho izingubo seziphumile, kukhona okuguqukayo ekhanda lami. Ngokungazelelwe ngiyabona nje ukuthi akayona enye yalezo zinkulungwane zamantombazane ezithombeni ezingcolile ezinemizimba engenaphutha, ungumuntu wangempela. Futhi ngiyamthanda. Ngiyabuthanda ubuntu bakhe, ngiyamomotheka, futhi ngithanda umphefumulo wakhe. Ungikhathalela kakhulu futhi uhlala esho ukuthi uthandana kanjani nami, nami ngokunjalo, ngaphandle kwengxenye yokuheha ngokomzimba.
Ngempela angikwazi ukuhlala ngivukile ngesikhathi socansi. Ngihlale kanzima ngaphandle kwenkathazo enkulu, kepha bengingangeni kukho. Futhi angizwanga lutho. Hhayi ngesikhathi sokuya ocansini, hhayi ngesikhathi sokubamba izandla, hhayi ngesikhathi somlomo, kodwa ngesikhathi nangesikhathi KUPHELA ngesikhathi sokushaya indlwabu. Kwakufanele kube YIMI, nesandla SAMI, futhi okubi kakhulu, ukucabanga KWAMI ukwenza wonke umsebenzi. Akunandaba ukuthi wenzeni noma wathini, noma ngabe ngangimbheka kangakanani futhi ngizama ukubonisana nami, ngangingezwa lutho. Bengimane ngihamba ngeminyakazo, ngingenawo umuzwa.
Ngigcine ngiqedile, kabili, futhi zombili lezi zikhathi bekuvela ekuzikhuthazeni, futhi zombili izikhathi bengingenaye engqondweni, bengiya kwenye indawo, ngishintsha phakathi kwamathebhu avulwe kuzinkumbulo ezibekiwe, izithombe nokulandelana nemisindo evela ngokwesabekayo i-database enkulu yamaphikseli ishiswe ebuchosheni bami. Ngehla kanjalo-ke. Kwakudingeka ngibuke izithombe ezingcolile ekhanda lami.
Kuyabheda lokho.
Kukhona lo wesifazane omangalisayo osho okuningi kimi kunanoma ngubani noma yini enye kulo mhlaba, osindise impilo yami ngokuba yingxenye yayo, engimthandayo ezingeni elijulile, elicishe libe ngele cosmic, yingakho inamandla amakhulu. Ungumngane wami omkhulu futhi ngiyamthanda futhi ngiyamkhumbula njalo ngomzuzwana anginaye. Kepha kukhona le ngxenye yekhanda lami engathandeki engancamela amanye amantombazane ayi-100 phezu kwakhe, amantombazane amancane futhi ahle ngokwengeziwe, amantombazane angenandaba nami, amantombazane angingawanaki. Mhlawumbe kungenxa yokuthi angikalitholi ithuba lokuba nomunye umuntu, noma ukuzwa noma ikuphi kwalokho, kodwa ngiyakulangazelela.
Leyo yinto engenza ngingaqiniseki ngokuba naye, ukuzinikezela kuye nakuye kuphela. Ngisazizwa ngiyintsha enama-horoni evuthayo egwinya amathe phezu kwabo bonke abesifazane abashisayo abayibonayo, futhi ifuna ukubenzela zonke lezi zinto, izinto ezi-kinky futhi kwesinye isikhathi ezilulazayo ngokususelwe kulokho engikubonile-engikubonile, engingakuthandi- eminyakeni iminyaka yokubuka i-porn. Konke kuyabonakala. Zonke lezi zinto ezingivulela indlela futhi zihambe, lezi zithakazelo ezithile kanye nezimbangela ezingifaka kanzima futhi zingisuse, konke kuyizinto ezibukwayo. Akukho muzwa ohilelekile, akukho ukuthinta, akukho phunga, akukho ukunambitheka, akukho mizwa. Okubonwayo nemisindo nje, kepha ikakhulukazi okubonwayo. Futhi yileyondlela ubuchopho bami buzixhumanise ngayo manje.
Akuyona neze indlela engangikucabanga ngayo, lapho empeleni ngisesikhathini, ngikuzwa ngokoqobo, ayikho injabulo, akukho ukuvusa inkanuko, akukho ukujabula, nje… ukungabi nalutho, ubuze lapho kufanele kube khona okuthile okukhethekile. Ngizizwa nginqanyuliwe futhi nginamahloni nami manje ukuthi ekugcineni ngisebenzisa umzimba wami ukuthola engikufunayo iminyaka, futhi ukuphela kwendlela enginganelisa ngayo izifiso zami, njengoba bengineminyaka eyisi-8 edlule, ukukwenza mina. Futhi lapho ngikude naye futhi ngiqala ukuyifuna, ngiyazi ukuthi kufanele ngiye kuphi. Ukuphela kokufanele ngikwenze ukuvula i-laptop yami, isithandwa esisodwa esihlale sikhona kimi.
Noma kungenasikrini phambi kwami, izithombe zisekhona. Ngingababiza futhi ngibabize ngentando futhi ngibasebenzisele ukuzenza ngibe mnandi, ngenkathi ngibheka intombi yami emehlweni, ngenkathi enami ngaleso sikhathi, futhi ngiya kwelinye igumbi lokulala elingaziwa noma ekhishini noma yokugezela nomunye wesifazane engingasoze ngahlangana naye. Ngizizwa ngigula kimi. Ngempela kuzwakala njengokukhohlisa. Ngibuke izithombe zobulili ezingcolile emizuzwini engama-30 edlule futhi ngagxuma futhi ngagxila futhi ngazizwa ngimangalisa futhi ngiphelelwa amandla futhi ngidonsa ngokomzwelo ngendlela ehlala yenza ngayo, futhi intombi yami iphume edolobheni ezinsukwini ezimbalwa ezizayo, futhi ngifunga kunkulunkulu, ngizizwa ngathi Bengingathembekile kuye. Ngimthanda ngayo yonke inhliziyo yami, kepha ubuchopho bami bunamehlo abo bonke abanye abantu. Ngiyisiqeshana somuntu.
Ngemininingwane efanelekile:
- (Isifundo) “Ukuvezwa kwezingcolile zobulili ngaphezu kwenkambo yokuphila kanye nobukhulu bezenzo zocansi: Imiphumela yokulingisa kanye ne-cathartic”Ukuvezwa kwentsha kwenza izephulamthetho zibe nobudlova nokululaza kakhulu kunokuvezwa kwabantu abadala.
- Ukufaka okuningi? nguRobert Taibbi, uLCSW
- Ingabe i-porn ihlupha phakade? (Salon.com)
- I-Teenage Brain: UDkt. Jay Giedd weNational Institute of Health Mental
- (Ividiyo) ngaphakathi kobuchopho bentsha - I-Talking Point noDkt Jay Giedd
- Insight Into Brain Teenage: U-Adriana Galván ku-TEDxYouth @ Caltech
- Ingqondo yobusha: Umsebenzi oqhubekayo (I-Fact Sheet) NIH
- EBANDLENI - Isizathu Esisodwa Intsha Esabela Ngokwehlukile Emhlabeni: Isifunda Esingavuthiwe Sobuchopho
- ENGAPHAMBILI- NGAPHAKATHI KOBUCHOPHO Bentsha (Idokhumenti)
- I-Brain: Inkinga Ngezinsizwa
- Ukufundwa: Ukukhathazeka kwandisa ukuvuthwa kocansi (1983)
- UkuThuthukiswa kocansi kwabantu kuhambelana nokufunda okuyisikhathi esiyinkimbinkimbi Ukufunda: Impikiswano yoMlutha Wezocansi, Ukwelashwa Ngokwezocansi, kanye Nokukhulisa Abantwana
- Umthelela wokufinyelela okungavinjelwe ekukhulisweni kwama-etica kuma-adolescents 'nasezintweni ezincane zabantu abadala ngokuqondene nobulili
- Ucwaningo lwe-Brain lwembula ukuthi intsha ifunda kanjani ngokuhlukile kunabantu abadala (i-2016)
AMAKHAYA:
Isethulo se-YBOP: Ubuchopho obusakhulayo buhambisana ne-Porns Highspeed Inthanethi (i-2013)
Isifundo - I-genital Cortex: Ukuthuthukiswa kwe-genital Homunculus (2019)
Ngokungafani nezinye izitho zomzimba, izitho zangasese ze- "sensory homunculus" zikhula kakhulu ngesikhathi sokuthomba.
Siyazibuza ukuthi ingabe ukubunjwa kwesitho sangasese ngokuhlangana kokuqala kwezocansi kunomthelela kwisisindo sawo esikhulu se-mnemonic kanye nemiphumela yaso enamandla ekuboneni ubulili bomuntu siqu. ...
Uhlu olufanele lwezifundo:
- Ukulutha kobulili / ucansi? Leli khasi libala Ucwaningo lwe-50 lwe-neuroscience (I-MRI, i-fMRI, i-EEG, i-neuropsychological, i-hormonal). Bonke bahlinzeka ngokusekelwa okuqinile kwemodeli yokulutha njengoba abakutholayo bebonisa okutholwe yi-neurological ocwaningweni olubhekiswe kwizidakamizwa.
- Imibono yangempela yezobuchwepheshe ekubhekaneni nocansi / ucansi? Lolu hlu luqukethe Ukubuyekezwa kwezincwadi ezingama-25 zakamuva ze-neuroscience & imibono ngezinye zezazi eziphezulu zezinzwa emhlabeni. Bonke basekela imodeli yokulutha.
- Izimpawu zokulutha umlutha nokukhula kwezinto ezimbi kakhulu? Izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-50 ezibika okutholakele zihambisana nokukhula kokusetshenziswa kocansi (ukubekezela), ukujwayela izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ngisho nezimpawu zokuhoxiswa (zonke izimpawu nezimpawu ezihambisana nokulutha). Ikhasi elengeziwe nge Izifundo eziyi-10 ezibika izimpawu zokuhoxiswa kwabasebenzisi be-porn.
- Izinkinga zobulili nezinkinga zobulili? Lolu hlu luqukethe izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-40 ezixhumanisa ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn / ukubheja kocansi ezinkingeni zobulili nokuvusa okuncane ezenzweni zobulili. The Ucwaningo lokuqala lwe-7 ohlwini lubonisa ibangela, njengoba abahlanganyeli beqede ukusetshenziswa kwezingcolile kanye nokuphulukisa okungavamile kocansi.
- Imiphumela yocansi ebuhlotsheni? Izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-75 zixhumanisa ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn kuya ukwaneliseka okuncane kwezocansi nokwabelana ngokobudlelwano. Njengoba sisazi konke Izifundo ezibandakanya abesilisa ziye zabika ukusetshenziswa okuningi kocansi okuxhunyiwe abampofu ukwaneliseka ngokobulili noma ngokobudlelwano.
- Ukusebenzisa i-Porn kuthinta impilo engokomzwelo nengqondo? Izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-80 zixhumanisa ukusetshenziswa kocansi nezimpofu ezingokwengqondo-ezingokomzwelo nemiphumela empofu yokuqonda.
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Abasebenzisi base-UK kumele bangene ngemvume ye-porn web
Amazwana kusuka ekuhlanganiseni: iPhuppy Love vs. PMO
I-puppy Love vs. PMO
Amandla we-Porn wokubopha ukuthuthukiswa kwengqondo
Kulungile-
Sekunesikhathi ngifunda zonke izindatshana namazwana akule sayithi. Njengamawebhusayithi amaningi, angivamile ukwenza umzamo wokwenza i-akhawunti ukuze nje ngithumele inani lamasenti ami amabili. Kodwa ngenxa yokuthi ababhali nabasebenzisi bale webhusayithi benze umsebenzi omuhle kangaka wokwehlisa imiphumela yezocansi ekukhuleni komuntu ngokocansi, ngizizwe ngidinga ukukhombisa amaphuzu amaningana isayithi elidansayo kodwa aliphumi futhi lisho. Mhlawumbe okwami okwedlule kukhanyisa le miqondo ngokucace kakhudlwana kimi kunakwabanye abantu.
Lapho nje ngiba neminyaka engama-21, ngahlangana nentombazane enezinwele ezinsundu, enamehlo aluhlaza esifundweni sokufundela umsebenzi ekolishi. Ngenyanga yokuqala, lapho uthando lwami lokuqala luqhakaza, angizange ngiphawule ukuthi kwenzekani. Khona-ke, ngolunye usuku, njengokungathi ngishaywe umcibisholo, ukuba phambi kwakhe kwangenza ngazizwa nginyama futhi ngishiselwa, ngacishe ngahluleka ukuzibamba. Iminyaka emibili eyalandela (emva kokwenqatshwa nguye) ibe isihogo esimsulwa. Unyaka wokuqala wawuhlanganisa nokungakwazi ukulala nokulala. Ngaphathwa ukushaya kwenhliziyo, ukuqwasha, ukuncipha okukhulu kwesisindo nomzimba, ukuthuthumela, ukuphaphatheka, imicabango ephithizelayo. Kunjengokungathi ngibhajwe ephusheni; lapho ngilwela ukubaleka, iphupho lalingidla ngamandla. Wayengene ebudlelwaneni besikhathi esifushane nomunye umfana cishe izinyanga ezimbili, futhi izithombe zaphakathi kwamabili soirees zagcwalisa ingqondo yami kanye neso lengqondo. Ngangihlushwa imicabango yobulili engangibubona ezithombeni ezingcolile, futhi kwangiphazamisa ezingeni elijule kakhulu. Njengencasakazi imfundo yayo yocansi isukela ku-porn ye-inthanethi kuphela, umbono wokuthi uthando lwempilo yakho lwachitha ubusuku nemini ubhekana nomfana ayengazi ukuthi ungithumele onqenqemeni.
Kulo nyaka odlule, bengilokhu ngihlaziya ukuthi yini engahambanga kahle, futhi ngifuna izimpendulo zemibuzo eminingi edidayo. Kungani ngiqala ukuthandana ngineminyaka engu-22, njengoba kwakubonakala sengathi ontanga yami babhekana nalokhu kusukela beneminyaka engu-16 ubudala? Kwenzeka kanjani ukuba ngingazange ngithande muntu ekuphileni kwangempela kuze kube yileso sikhathi? Kwenzeka kanjani ukuba kungabi khona muntu kuze kube yileso sikhathi sangidonsa amehlo, futhi kungani ngingathandi abantu abaneziqu, njengoba kwenza abanye? Kube sengathi kuvuliwe iswishi kungazelelwe ebuchosheni bami-kwaba umphumela wokuphendula konke noma lutho.
Kunengozi efika nakho konke lokhu kucabanga. Kokukodwa, ngithuthela endaweni engakwazi ukukalwa noma ukuqinisekiswa, noma okungenani engalinganiswa nganoma iyiphi indlela ethembekile/evumelekile. Akekho owaziyo ukuthi ubuchopho buma kuphi futhi nengqondo iqala, ngakho-ke kuzo zonke izifundo ze-neuroscientific laphaya mayelana nokulutha kwezithombe zobulili ezingcolile, okuwukuphela kwemali yangempela enginayo kule ndaba ukwethembeka okuphelele nobuqiniso. Angikwazi ukufakazela izimpendulo zale mibuzo, kodwa ngingathembeka futhi ngibe neqiniso ngangokunokwenzeka. Yikho konke enginakho.
Uma ngibheka emuva, manje ngiyazi ukuthi *ingxenye* yesizathu esenza ngehluke kwabejwayelekile ukuthi ngangiwumzala osemthethweni osemthethweni, njengoba kwakunjalo nomama nomalume. Kwaze kwaba yilapho ngiba neminyaka engu-18 ubudala, ngangikwazi kuphela ukuvuselwa ubulili amantombazane ashisayo ngempela. Amantombazane ashisayo kakhulu–ku-PlayBoy, ezocansi, njll. Akekho umuntu empilweni yangempela ofinyelele kuleli zinga eliphezulu ngendlela engenakwenzeka. Futhi ngezikhathi ezingavamile lapho benza khona, kwakungekho mfutho wokwenza* noma yini ngabo (okungukuthi, ukuqabula, ukugona, ukucwala, ukuphulula, ukugoba). Ngavele ngaqhanyelwa yibona. Manje, ngase ngikwazi ukubheka amantombazane amahle futhi ngibone ngobuqotho ukuthi ayathandeka. Kodwa wawungekho umehluko wangempela emzweni ngaphandle kokuqaphela ngokuhlakanipha indoda ebukekayo. Ayefana nakimi.
Ezinyangeni ezimbili ngaphambi kosuku lwami lokuzalwa lwe-18th, nokho, izinto zashintsha. Amantombazane amathathu ekilasini lami angikhanga, futhi ngaqala ukuthatheka kuwo. Angazi noma ungakubiza nge-crush. “Ukuthakasela” kungase kube igama elingcono. Kodwa lezo zikhathi ezidlulayo zashabalala, futhi ngaya ekolishi eliqhele ngamakhilomitha angu-3000 ukusuka ekhaya, ukuya esikoleni se-Ivy League.
Unyaka wokuqala ekolishi awuzange ube nesithakazelo emantombazaneni. Ukube impilo yami yocansi/yothando bekuyikhabethe, ubungeke uthole lutho ngaphandle kwamakhilikithi, ubulembu, ukuthula nobumnyama. Abangane bami babezibuza ukuthi ngabe ngiyisitabane yini…kodwa babecabanga ukuthi anginabulili. Angizange ngicabange kangako ngakho, njengoba ngangigxile kakhulu esikoleni nakwezinye izinto. Lapho ngineminyaka engu-19, ngaqala ukuthatheka ngempela, engangingazange ngikuqaphele nangaleso sikhathi. Ngathi iningi lemizwa yokungenqaba komuntu yabangelwa ukucindezeleka nobusika obubandayo baseNew York. Ngakho-ke, akukho kulokhu okubhalisiwe nami.
Ngemva kwalokho, akukho lutho eminye iminyaka emibili. Ngalibangisa ngokusemthethweni emaphethelweni omphakathi.
Ukuhlukahluka kuwumqondo wokuziphendukela kwemvelo kanye nezifundo zesayensi yemvelo ezisiza ukukhuthaza ikhono lohlobo lokuzivumelanisa nezimo nokuphila. Ngamanye amazwi, sonke senzelwe ukuhluka, ngoba ngaphandle kokwehluka kwethu ngeke sikhule futhi siguquke. Kodwa ngaphansi kwawo wonke lowo mehluko, ungazi kanjani uma kukhona okudinga ukulungiswa? Umuntu ukuhlukanisa kanjani ukungasebenzi kweqiniso nokungajwayelekile nje?
Ngemva kokuhlangana nentombazane emhlophe, ngaqala umkhankaso wokuthola izimpendulo zeminye yemibuzo yami yokuthi kungani ngangingenasithakazelo sangempela emantombazaneni kwaze kwaba yilapho ngineminyaka engu-22 ubudala. UHelen Fisher waba usosayensi wokuqala engazithela kuye; ucwaningo lwakhe ngobuntu lunikeze ukuqonda okuthile ezimpendulweni zemibuzo yami. Isibonelo, waphawula ukuthi okukodwa kwezimo ezine eziyisisekelo zengqondo yomuntu (umqondisi/umphumela we-testosterone) wayengenaso isithakazelo sangempela sokuqomisana. Izingqondo zabo eziqinile zaziqondile futhi ziqondile; akukho abakwenzayo akunanhloso ethile. Konke kuwumncintiswano nabo. Izithakazelo zabo zijulile futhi zincane, ngokuphambene nokuba zibanzi kakhulu futhi azijulile. Bangabantu ababukhali kakhulu, abathatheka kalula (ngezinye izikhathi bathatheke) ngokuthile okubathakaselayo. Okufanayo kuhambisana nokuqomisana, uthi. Abanaso isithakazelo kakhulu ukuphola abayitoho, ngoba akuwenzi umqondo kubo. Kodwa lapho bethola umuntu abamthandayo, abami baze bathole lokho abakufunayo.
Ubumnene bami, ngokusekelwe emidlalweni yakhe, yiloMqondisi.
Ngakho-ke ingxenye yesizathu ngikholelwa ukuthi angizange ngihlanganyele ebudlelwaneni bokuthandana kuze kube ngu-22 kwakuyindaba yobuntu bami. Angiyena nje umuntu olula kakhulu. Ukwengeza kulokho, ukuqhakaza sekwephuzile kwasekuqaleni.
Kodwa kukhona okwengeziwe ngakho. Ukuba sothandweni kwami kwangiphazamisa ngandlela thize, ngoba angikwazanga ukuqonda ngokuzumayo engangikubona ku-porn. Ngingayenza kanjani into eyehlisa isithunzi kumuntu okuthi, njengoba uRobin Williams esho, “iNgelosi eyabekwa emhlabeni nguNkulunkulu uqobo”? Ngendlela efanayo ingane ibona izimo zokubulala emafilimini asabekayo kodwa empeleni ayilahli ubuthongo ngenxa yesipiliyoni ngoba ingxenye ethile yayo iyaqonda ukuthi ibukela amaphikseli hhayi iqiniso, nami angizange ngicabange okuningi ngezocansi engangizibonile. Akuzange kungifikele ngempela ukuthi lokhu kwakuyinto engokoqobo eyenziwa abantu emhlabeni wangempela. Wonke umuntu, ikakhulukazi. Futhi lokhu kuqonda kwangiphoqa ukuthi ngiqhamuke nezixazululo ezingokomzwelo/ ezengqondo zokuxhumanisa kwangempela enginakho mayelana nocansi. Nazi izinto engiziqaphelile ukuthi akekho ongathi azisho.
1. Impilo yangempela abathandanayo ababoni njengamasaka enyama. Izingane ezikhuliswe ngezocansi ukuze zifundiswe ngocansi aziqondi izinto eziningi abantu abadala abacabanga ukuthi “ziziphiwe” nje. Lapho insizwa ibona ucansi ekhasethi okokuqala ngqa, njengami, ayiqondi ukuthi abantu abalala ocansini ngokuvamile banemizwa ngomunye nomunye. Akaqondi ukuthi “akubonayo” kuhlukile kulokho abahlanganyeli “abakubonayo,” ngomqondo wokuthi babona into ethandwayo, kuyilapho ebona into yocansi futhi acabange ukuthi abahlanganyeli bayayenza, futhi. Kumuntu ongakaze athatheke, kodwa abuke amanyala ngokungaguquki, ngakholwa ukuthi uma ubheka umuntu wesifazane ofuna ukulala naye, kufanele umbone NGEMPELA njengeqatha lenyama. Ngaqala ukukholelwa ukuthi abantu baba nezifiso zobulwane zokuququda inyama, ngaphandle kokuqaphela noma ukuqaphela ubuntu bomunye umuntu. Lona umqondo onzima kakhulu ukuwuchaza kubantu, ngoba uma ngithi “ucezu lwenyama,” abantu abaningi ngokunganaki bacabanga ukuthi okungenani ngiyisingathekiso esincane. Kodwa iqiniso liwukuthi ngangicabanga ukuthi amadoda nabesifazane abenza ucansi baba izilwane imizuzu engamashumi amathathu osuku lwabo futhi babe nesifiso esinamandla sokufaka izitho zangasese emlonyeni wabo ngenxa yabo. Isenzo, ngacabanga, sasingenayo nhlobo incazelo ejulile; kwaba, emehlweni ami, ezingeni lokuzikhulula, ukuchama, noma ukudla ama-chips amazambane. Bekuyinto nje oyenzayo. Ukuvinjelwa kwakuwukuphela kwesizathu sokuthi ngicabange ukuthi wonke umuntu akalali nomunye.
Lokhu kubeka i-tint embi kakhulu kukho konke okuhlobene nocansi, ikakhulukazi kunsizwa enengqondo njengami. Kukhona iwebhusayithi echaza ukuqonda kwami okusha kwalokho okwenziwa abantu abaningi abahloniphekile ekamelweni, ebizwa ngokuthi makelovenotporn.com. Ku-porn evamile, angikaze ngikubone ukuqabulana, ukubamba, ukugona, ukuwotawotana nokuthandwa. Angikaze ngibone amahora namahora okucindezeleka ngokomzwelo okuhilelekile ngemva kokuhlukana. Noma iminyaka yokwabelana okuyimfihlo okujulile. Noma izinto ezicashile njengokuvuswa inkanuko ubuhle bezandla zowesifazane, noma amehlo akhe, noma ukumamatheka kwakhe. Ukukhula ezithombeni zocansi kwangenza ngabona ucansi njengento ehlambalazayo nengenalutho, hhayi isenzo sothando. Akekho ongaqonda uhlobo lomonakalo ongokwengqondo obangela ingqondo encane. I-Porn iphendula okuwukuqabula okukhulu kube ukushaya okunodlame.
2. Izithombe zocansi = ukuvusa inkanuko yocansi; ukuphila kwangempela = imizwa evuthayo nejulile yothando. Uma ubuka i-porn, umuzwa owutholayo AKUWONA umuzwa owuthola ngocansi lwangempela. I-Porn ngandlela-thile ihlukanisa uthando nocansi. Njengoba nje izingane zingaqondi ukuthi abahlanganyeli esenzweni banemizwa ejulile yenhlonipho nothando ngomlingani wabo (njengoba kushiwo ngenhla), baphinde bacabange ukuthi ukuvuswa kocansi okumsulwa ABAkuzwayo ngenkathi bebuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile nakho kuwumuzwa ofanayo abawuzwayo. uzothola ngesikhathi socansi lwangempela. Lokhu kwandisa nokungaqondi kahle mayelana nokusondelana ngokocansi. Kungenze ngakholelwa ukuthi bekufanele ngizwe into efanayo kumuntu empilweni yangempela njengoba ngenzile ngenkathi ngibuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ekugcineni okwehlisa ubuntu.
3. Ukuvuka kwenkanuko ku-porn kunamandla angu-400X ngaphezu kokuvusa inkanuko empilweni yangempela. Iningi lokuvusa inkanuko okuzwakala ku-porn lithathelwa indawo empilweni yangempela imizwa yothando efudumele kakhulu.
4. Izinto ezenziwa ngabadlali kwezocansi, abantu abaningi abazenzi empilweni yangempela. Abantu abaningi abahloniphekile banemingcele empilweni yangempela. Ngiyazicabangela lapha, kodwa angikholwa ukuthi abantu empilweni yangempela banomfutho wokumunca i-ejaculate embotsheni yomlingani wabo bese benza i-rectum nabo (i-felching), bahambise ulimi lwabo embotsheni yomunye (i-rimming), i-face fuck. othile, enze isidoda somlingani wakhe (ibhola eqhweni), noma enze owesilisa kuphela afafaze ubuso bakhe ngesidoda (ubuso). Ensizweni engaliqondi igama elithi “ukusondelana” lezi zenzo azibonisi uthando kodwa ziyalulaza futhi ziyehlisa isithunzi.
5. Uma abantu empilweni yangempela BENZA izinto ezibonwa insizwa ku-porn, ngokuvamile bazenza ngezindlela ezihluke kakhulu. Akukhona ngempela ukuthi LEKHO abakwenzayo lapha okubalulekile njengokuthi bakwenza KANJANI. Abantu emhlabeni wangempela bangase babone ucansi lomlomo njengesandiso nje sokuqabula abalingani babo, yonke indawo. Ku-porn, ama-blowjobs mabi futhi alulaza futhi afana nezilwane. Inqwaba ukushayela in porn in okuthakazelisayo futhi kumnandi; empilweni yangempela, kungenzeka ukuthi akukhululekile futhi kuyabangela amahloni.
6. Izithombe zocansi zihlukanisa umbukeli ngokwengqondo, zikhiphe ubungqabavu engqondweni yakhe. Uba ngabantu ababili, umlindi kanye nomhlanganyeli. Empeleni ukuhlukana naye kumphuca ikhono lakhe lokwenza izinto ngezifiso zakhe zothando.
Kunendikimba ewumsuka kuwo wonke la maphuzu mayelana nezithombe zocansi, okungukuthi ezocansi zihlukanisa uthando nocansi. Empilweni noma abantu ababili abathandanayo baya ocansini kodwa benza lokho abebezokwenza ukube bebethandana. Abantu abathi bajolela amantombazane ashisayo kodwa bathandane nezintombi zabo empeleni bazama ukusho ukuthi okokuqala ukuqabula okungabonisi uthando, kepha lokhu okulandelayo kuwuthando. Ukuqabula ukuqabula. Zimbalwa kakhulu izindlela engingazicabanga zokwenza kube nodlame. Okufanayo kuya ekuphileni kwangempela ngenhlonipho, ubulili obuvumelanayo. Ngakolunye uhlangothi lwe-spectrum, obunye “ubudlelwano” bungase bube ngokobulili kakhulu kunobuthando (okungukuthi, “abangane abangani”), kanti ngakolunye bungase bube bothando ngaphezu kocansi (okungukuthi, “u-Romeo no-Juliet”). Kodwa kunoma yikuphi ukweqisa, abukho ubuhlobo bangempela obungenalo nhlobo uthando noma inkanuko. Zonke ziyinhlanganisela yazo zombili. Intsha kufanele ikuqonde lokhu, ukuze amakhampasi ayo okuziphatha angashaqeki njengoba kweyami.
wamukele futhi ubonge ngokuqonda
Amaphuzu owalethayo (i-1-6) yizimpikiswano eziyinhloko ezibhalwe ochwepheshe abaningi abakhathazekile namawebhusayithi "aphikisana nezocansi". Esinye sezizathu esingazihloli ekugxilweni kwengqondo ukuthi iningi lamanye amasayithi nabachwepheshe benza. Umsebenzi wethu ukubhala ngalokho esikwaziyo futhi sifundise umphakathi nge-neurobiology yokulutha.
Okwesibili, izifundo ezimbalwa (ezakhiwe kabi) ziphakamisa ukuthi i-porn ayikwenzi okuchazayo. Uma siveza amaphuzu akho avumeleke kakhulu, abaphikisi bamane babhale izifundo ezimbalwa ezibuyekezwa kontanga ukuphikisa lawa maphuzu.
Yazi, ngicabanga ukuthi ungaphezu kokulungile. Yimibuzo yemibuzo engenamagama angalivezi iqiniso. Ukubuza osemusha ukuthi bacabanga ukuthi i-porn ibathinta kanjani ukuthanda inhlanzi ukuthi bacabangani ngamanzi. Iqiniso libonakala kangcono kulezo zinkulungwane zezinsizwa ezilulama ekuluthweni kocansi, noma ekusetshenzisweni kocansi.
Sikhathazeke kakhulu ngokushicilelwa kwengqondo. Kukhulu kakhulu. Isayithi lami lixhumanisa nokubonakala kuyo yonke indawo. Ngifunde izinkulungwane zemicu, eminye inezinkulungwane zokuthunyelwe, okuvela cishe emazweni ahlukene angama-30. Ngingakuqinisekisa konke okushilo.
Ayikho inkinga
Ngemva kokufunda impendulo yakho, ngangena ku-Google "i-porn imprinting psychological" futhi ngaqala ukufunda lonke ucwaningo. Kuyangimangaza ukubathola besho izinto engizishilo, ngezinye izikhathi ngisho nangolimi olufanayo. Angiqiniseki ukuthi ngingayihlukanisa kanjani imiphumela ye-porn kubuntu bami bemvelo noma amahomoni. Ngisho ukuthi, wonke umuntu usabela ngendlela ehlukile. Lapho ngiqala ukubuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, kwangicacela kakhulu ukuthi engangikubuka kwakuhleliwe. Kodwa njengoba izinto ziqhubeka, umugqa phakathi kocansi olwakhiwe nolweqiniso ku-tape waqala ukufiphala. Amanye amavidiyo abonisa abantu obekucaca ukuthi ababona abadlali, kodwa ngokusobala babazi ukuthi aqoshwa omunye umuntu egumbini.
Kungani i-porn ingithinte ngendlela ehluke kangaka kunabanye kuseyimfihlakalo. Kungenzeka yini ukuthi ihlobene nokuthi abanye abafana baqala ukuwela amantombazane ngesikhathi esifanayo baqala ukubuka izithombe ezingcolile? Lokhu kungamelana nanoma imiphi imibono eyiphutha abanayo ngobulili bangempela. Mhlawumbe banobuntu obungaqinile kangako, noma mhlawumbe abacabangi ngokujulile. Kungani i-porn ihuqa abanye abafana hhayi mina? Ngemuva konyaka wami wesibili ekolishi, ngavele ngayeka ukuyibuka ngaphandle kwezinkinga. Akuzange kudingeke ukuba ngigweme ngomzamo; Ngisanda kuphuma kukho.
Okuxakayo ukuthi uma izingane zifuna ngempela ukwazi ukuthi yini okufanele “zizwe” lapho zifuna ukwenza uthando nothile, kungaba ngcono uma zibukela amafilimu afana ne-“Titanic,” “Good Will Hunting,” noma “Forrest Gump.” Izithombe ezingcolile zocansi zigqamisa futhi ngandlela thize zihlubula uthando oluboshwe ngokungenakuvinjelwa nobulili bangempela, obuvamile noma cha.
Enye imbangela engenzeka yazo zonke lezi zinkinga ngabesilisa ababuka i-porn ukuthi kunenkathi yesikhathi empilweni yendoda lapho ucansi AKUKHO othandweni, lapho ukuvukwa kwenkanuko akuzwayo kungenalo nhlobo uthando. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ucabanga kangakanani "ngothando" akakwazi ukuvuswa. Kumelwe acabange okuthile okuqondile kanye ne-visceral ukuze avuswe. Le ndida phakathi kothando nocansi akuyona into abantu besifazane ababhekana nayo, angicabangi. Lokhu kungichazela ukuthi kungani abafana bengavamisile ukuthuthukisa “ukuchotshozwa” njengoba kwenza okwamantombazane. Lokhu kuphinde kuchaze ukuthi kungani abafana bekwazi kakhulu ukuya ocansini nje kuphela kunabesifazane, noma kungani abafana bekwazi ukuvuswa kalula ezibukweni, kuyilapho abesifazane bedinga uhlobo oluthile lwephepha lomzwelo ukuze bafinyelele kuvuthondaba.
Amazwana kusuka ku-yourbrainrebalanced.com
Amazwana kusuka ekuhlanganiseni kabusha ibhulogi
Kuthunyelwe ngu- I-Westminster93 NgoThu, 2012-05-10 13: 49
Kusuka kulokhu okuhlangana kabusha okuthunyelwe - Umphumela ocacile we-porn inthanethi
Imemori enhle kakhulu? Kungenzeka uthathe isinqumo njengomuntu osemusha
Amazwana: Sakha izinkumbulo ezinamandla ngesikhathi sethu sokukhula
Julayi 20, 2012 ku-Psychology & Psychiatry
“Inkumbulo enhle? Kungenzeka unqume njengomuntu osemusha. ” Julayi 20, 2012. http://medicalxpress.com/news/2012-07-memory-youre-teen.html
Ingxoxo eyalizwa ebhasini yangenza ngizizwe kabi kuwe
"Ukuthumelelana imiyalezo ngocansi" kuxhumene futhi nobulili obuyingozi phakathi kwentsha
"Ukuthumelelana imiyalezo ngocansi" kuxhumene futhi nobulili obuyingozi phakathi kwentsha
By Genevra Pittman
ENEW YORK (Reuters Health) - Oyedwa kwabafundi abayisikhombisa baseLos Angeles abanomakhalekhukhwini uthumele umlayezo noma isithombe esithinta ezocansi, ngokusho kwemiphumela yocwaningo lwango-2011 oluthola nokuthi “abantu abathumelelana imiyalezo yocansi” kungenzeka babe sengozini ukuziphatha kocansi.
Ocwaningweni olusha, intsha ye-LA eyayithumele imibhalo ye-racy yayinamathuba aphindwe kasikhombisa okuzibandakanya ocansini kunalabo abathi abasoze bathumela imiyalezo ngocansi.
“Akekho umuntu ozothola isifo esithathelwana ngocansi ngoba bathumelelana imiyalezo yocansi,” kusho u-Eric Rice, umcwaningi wokuxhumana nabantu wase-University of Southern California eLos Angeles, owayehola lolu cwaningo olusha.
“Lokho ebesifuna ukukwazi ngempela ukuthi, ingabe kukhona ukuxhumana phakathi kokuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi nokuzibeka engcupheni ngomzimba wakho? Impendulo ingu-yebo ocacile, ”utshele iReuters Health.
Ucwaningo olwenziwa eHouston, eTexas, esikoleni esiphakeme ekuqaleni kwalesi sihlobo sitholakale esisodwa eminyakeni eyishumi ubudala selithumele isithombe se-naked ngokwabo ngomyalezo wombhalo noma i-imeyili, futhi labo bantwana bebaningi kakhulu amathuba okuba nobulili obuyingozi. (Bheka indaba ye-Reuters Health kaJulayi 2, i-2012).
Ukuthola kukaRice, okushicilelwe ngoMsombuluko ephephabhukwini i-Pediatrics, kusekelwe kubafundi abayi-1,839 abasezikoleni eziphakeme zaseLos Angeles, iningi labo okwakunguLatino. Amakota amathathu kubo babenomakhalekhukhwini ababewusebenzisa njalo.
Ocwaningweni oluxhaswe yiCenters for Disease Control and Prevention, ngaphezu kwamaphesenti angama-40 entsha eneselula ithe iye ocansini, futhi cishe izingxenye ezimbili kwezintathu zisebenzise ikhondomu okokugcina lapho zenze khona.
URice uthe izinga lokuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi yentsha eHouston kungenzeka ukuthi liphakame kancane kunaseLos Angeles ngenxa yokungafani kwabantu - kodwa kukonke le mibiko iyahambisana.
"Endaweni ethile maphakathi mhlawumbe ukulinganiselwa okuhle okwenzeka kuzwelonke," kusho uJeff Temple, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo nomcwaningi wezempilo wabesifazane waseThe University of Texas Medical Branch eGalveston obesebenza ocwaningweni lwaseHouston.
Ucwaningo lwakhe luthole ukuthi amantombazane ikakhulukazi abethumele izithombe ezinqunu maningi amathuba okuthi azibandakanye ocansini oluyingozi, abe nabalingani abaningi bezocansi bakamuva noma asebenzise utshwala nezidakamizwa ngaphambi kocansi.
"Ukuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi kubonakala kuwukukhombisa noma inkomba yokuziphatha kwezocansi," kusho uTempel etshela abeReuters Health.
"Abakwenzayo ezimpilweni zabo ezingaxhunyiwe kwi-inthanethi yilokho abakwenzayo ezimpilweni zabo eziku-inthanethi."
Ilayisi lavuma ukuthi lokho kwakungukuthola okubaluleke kunakho konke okungasusa kulezi zifundo zombili. "Lokho kungaba yinto engekho engqondweni kwabanye abazali, kepha kungabethusa abanye," kusho yena.
"Lokhu kungukuziphatha okwenziwa yidlanzana lentsha, kepha lelo qembu elincane lizibandakanya neqembu lezenzo eziyingozi zokuya ocansini… hhayi ukuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi kuphela."
Ngokuthumela imiyalezo yocansi, kukhona nokukhathazeka kokuthi izithombe ezinqunu zizophela ku-Intanethi futhi intsha izohlukunyezwa online, noma ukuthi abafundi abathola imibhalo ecacile bangabekwa icala lezithombe zocansi zezingane.
Abaphenyi basenemibuzo eminingi mayelana nokuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi, kufaka phakathi ukuthi iziphi izitshudeni ezingathumelelana imiyalezo nemiyalezo yocansi nokuthi yiziphi ezinye izindlela zokuziphatha noma zobuntu ezingase zivame kakhulu kwabathumela imiyalezo ngocansi. UTemple nozakwabo njengamanje basebenza ocwaningweni ukubona ukuthi yini eza kuqala kuqala phakathi kwentsha - ukuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi noma ucansi.
Okwamanje, uRice uthe abazali nothisha bangakwazi ukusebenzisa ukusakazwa kwabezindaba ngosaziwayo bakamuva noma osopolitiki abathumelelana imiyalezo yocansi nokuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi njengesihloko sokukhuluma nentsha ngokuthumelelana imiyalezo yocansi kanye nocansi lwangempela - ikakhulukazi ngoba bobabili bahlobene kakhulu.
"Ukuthumelelana imiyalezo ngocansi kungaba yingxoxo elula kothisha ukuqala ukuxoxa nentsha kunengxoxo egcwele eqala ngokuthi, 'Asikhulume ngocansi,'" esho.
SOURCE: bit.ly/jsoh2P I-Pediatrics, ku-intanethi ngo-September 17, i-2012.
Konke esikwaziyo, njengoba thina
angakaze ngizwe ngisho ne-intanethi kuze kube yonyaka wami wokugcina
KUFUNDWA; Ukuguqulwa kwedijithali kanye nobuchopho obusha bokuziphendukela kwemvelo.
Ukuguqulwa kwedijithali kanye nobuchopho obusha bokuziphendukela kwemvelo.
Umthombo
Isigaba sokuCabangela Ubuchopho, Igatsha Lengqondo Yezingane, Isikhungo Sikazwelonke Sempilo Yengqondo, Bethesda, Maryland, eU.SA.
abstract
Intuthuko ephawulekayo kwezobuchwepheshe enika amandla ukusatshalaliswa nokusetshenziswa kolwazi olunamakhodi njengokulandelana kwedijithali kwama-1s noma ama-0 kushintshe kakhulu indlela yethu yokuphila. Intsha, emidala ngokwanele ukuba nobuchule kwezobuchwepheshe futhi isencane ngokwanele ukwamukela ubusha bayo, ihamba phambili kulolu “shintsho lwedijithali.” Isisekelo sokwamukelwa ngentshiseko kwengane kulezi zinguquko ezinkulu yi-neurobiology eyenziwe yimililo yokuziphendukela kwemvelo ukuze ibe nekhono ngokweqile ekuzivumelaniseni nezimo. Imiphumela yokujwayela kobuchopho ezifunweni namathuba enkathi yedijithali inemithelela emikhulu kongoti bezempilo bentsha.
Ishicilelwe ngu-Elsevier Inc.
Ukuphila okukhohliwe abaningi
I-GUY 2)
I-GUY 3)
ukuhlambalaza ngokocansi mayelana nabalingani be-2nd behlukumeza
Amazwana asuka ku-50 unyaka ubudala
Amazwana asuka ku-45 unyaka ubudala
Akusekho umuntu owaziyo ngobukhulu besilisa
Ukushaya indlwabu nge-vibrator esemncane kubangele ukuthi u-ED unomphela
Abazali bami banginike ukuphathwa kwe-0 ngamakhompyutha
UGabe ukhumbula ingxoxo nomnyaka we-15 ubudala
U-Re: Gabe (yobudala 25) noGary baxoxe ngokuthola ukutholakala ku-ED eyenziwe ngocansi
Okulandelayo kubhalwe nguGabe Qala kabusha isizwe. UGabe uvame ukukhuluma nentsha, futhi lokhu kukukhumbula kwakhe ingxoxo nomnyaka we-15.
Impendulo yalo mbuzo:
-Yebo, abanye babo bayakwazi akwenzayo. Akangenanga ekutheni basabela kanjani, kepha wathi lo mfana akanandaba.
Nansi ingxenye yenkulumo yethu yangempela ehlanganisa lokhu:
Mina: "Ngakho wonke umuntu esikoleni sakho uthola i-laptop yakhe ngqo?"
Intsha: "yebo"
Mina: “ingabe bavimba u-facebook no-twitter ukugcina i-y'all ingabikhona usuku lonke, ibhalwe ukuthi isikole sinesithukuthezi kangakanani, noma ufisa kangakanani ngabe ubudlala ekhaya ubiza umsebenzi? (umdlalo wevidiyo) ”
Intsha: "haha bayazama futhi, kodwa wonke umuntu uyazi ukuthi angayithola kanjani indawo, bathi uma sibanjwa (nge facebook) uyathunyelwa ehhovisi, kodwa akwenzeki ukubuyela emuva. Bathi bazosebenzisa i-akhawunti yomunye umuntu abangabangane neqembu labafundi futhi abone ukuthi ubani o-intanethi uyazigwinya, kodwa akenzanga. "
Mina: "Yeka indlela okwakungathi ngayo futhi lapho i-Xanga ne-MySpace kuqala kuqala. Sizicabange ukuthi singaphila amabhlogo abo ezinsukwini ze-2. Kuthiwani ngamafoni, ngiyazi wonke umuntu usefonini labo lonke usuku futhi angazithola ku-intanethi kubo? "
Intsha: "Oh ngokuqinisekile ngiyathanda, ngithi ezinye izingane zithatha ifoni yabo, kodwa iningi lezikhathi abasicela ukuba siyibeke. Sithi yebo mam bese imizuzwana engu-5 ibhalela i-tweet mayelana nekholi yokuvala "
Mina: “ake ngikubuze lokhu… bangaki abafana esikoleni ababuka izithombe zocansi kuma-iphones abo, noma kuma-laptops?”
Intsha: "O muntu, amathani. Akuyona yonke into kuma-laptops kodwa cishe wonke umuntu kumafoni awo. "
Mina: "yebo yilokho engangikucabanga ukuthi uzokusho, ngikubheja ukuthi bayakwenza kahle phakathi kwekilasi ilungelo?"
Intsha: "konke ... isikhathi ... isikhathi. Akekho uhlaya lo mfana oyedwa uhlezi emva kwami futhi nje ebuka efonini yakhe ekhanda lakhe lonke iklasi libuka amavidiyo. Akanandaba nokuthi ubani ombona. "
Mina: "linda, ngisho noma amantombazane embona?"
Intsha: "yebo wayengakhathalela kancane uma intombazane ibona, yena nabangane bakhe bacabanga ukuthi kuyamangalisa."
Mina: "Kumele kube nzima klasini ukulalela uma wazi ukuthi kwenzekani eceleni kwakho."
Intsha: "Ngempela! Ngifana nomngane, unamantombazane amahle ahlezi nxazonke zakho, futhi uhlezi lapho efonini yakho eqala esikrinini, akunakwenzeka. "
Mina: "haha akukho akushoyo, ngabe uneminyaka emingaki lapho uqala ukubona izithombe zobulili ezingcolile?"
Intsha: "Yebo, bekuyihlobo ngaphambi kwebanga le-5th lapho ngaya endlini yomngani; wayeneqembu lakhe ku-Xbox yakhe. "
Mina: "Yebo-ke ubudala obuphakathi beminyaka engama-10 ubudala manje kubafana, kuyaphambuka. Kwakunjani isikole esiphakathi, ngoba amaphones ayekade eseduzane okwesikhashana manje. "
Intsha: "Isikole esiphakathi sasinjalo, mhlawumbe sibi nakakhulu. Kwakukhona izikhathi ezimbalwa ebangeni le-7th lapho abafana bezobeka ifoni yabo phakathi kwetafula lesidlo sasemini futhi wonke umuntu wayezosizungeza futhi abukele. "
Siphakathi kwesifo esibulalayo izigidi zabantu, umgomo wami ukwenza isayensi ye-neuroscience ngemuva kokubuka ulwazi oluvamile lwe-porn.
ngincane kakhulu ukuthi ngingacansini, kodwa ngithole izithombe ze-intanethi
Kuzwakala sengathi angisoze nganeliseka ngize ngizame izinto ezikulo
ukuvuselela ingqondo yami kancane, ukunciphisa ukuphikisana kwe-wome
Ngemuva kweminyaka engu-6 yokungazigcini ngokobulili ezingcolile zobulili,
Angikaze ngihlose ngempela ukwabelana nganoma yini engibhalele, kodwa mhlawumbe lokhu kuzosiza umuntu.
Yini evamile futhi?
Ngingu-27yo Ophoqelelwe Ukubuka I-Porn Kusuka ku-4-6yo
Incwadi yokuxolisa
ukukhathazeka emva kwezinsuku ze-20, kodwa ukubamba umfowethu esenzweni sokusiza
Lapho ngineminyaka engu-10 ngaqala ukuphequlula i-intanethi, ngibheka phezulu amagama
I-Porn yangifundisa ukuthi ukuba ngumuntu kwakuyi-orgasm.
Ngaphambi kokuthi ngiqale konke lokhu, ngibheka indlala ngokufana nezocansi
Kukhona umehluko ohlukile phakathi kokubuka i-vanilla esec
Ukulutha kabi ngocansi kungokoqobo, ngithembele abantu
Manje ngifika kuZINYE. Gore, i-snuff, i-hardcore anal, i-prolapses
Izinyanga ezingu-2 ezikhohlakeleyo mahhala! Kulabo abakucabanga ngokusebenzisa
P akuyona yangempela.
Bengizama ukuyeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile
KUSEBENZISWA NGOKUSEBENZA
Re: Ingabe i-porn yakushintsha ubuntu bakho?
Re: Ingabe i-porn yakushintsha ubuntu bakho?
Lokhu, lokhu nalokhu.
hhayifefeelingit
Ngaphambi kocansi
Bengingacabangi ukuthi ngiyisigqila
kodwa bonke babeyisigqila, futhi bazi ukuthi kudingeka bayeke.
Lokho engikufunde ku-pornography
Lokho engikufunde ku-pornography
by ukudubulaizinsuku 21
Krowgizinsuku 37
Ungakhohlwa "omunye" umphumela omubi we-porn.
Noma yibaphi abahlengikazi abayishumi nambili abaqala i-nofap? Awuwedwa
wayengekho umlutha, kepha kungithinte ngayo yonke enye indlela
Ngingowesifazane oneminyaka engu-26 ubudala (ukuphawula ngamadoda amancane, izithombe zobulili ezingcolile kanye nobulili)
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/reader-comments/p/comment/link/43647381
Ngineminyaka engu-15 ubudala futhi idrayivu yami yocansi inciphile
http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/1vlk0o/kids_access_to_porn/
Ukubuyekeza. Yisiphi isenzo socansi esithinta ubuchopho bethu.
Ubudala 16 - I-Porn Akuyona Ingxenye Yempilo Yami futhi
Amathebhu nokulandwa kanye nokuhamba okunye nokunye njll njalonjalo njalonjalo
kusuka ku- r / nofap
Kungani ngimise (i-17 yo)
Kungani ngimise (i-17 yo)
Le shit ishintshe ngempela ubuchopho bethu futhi konke kunengqondo
Ubulili bobulili obungcolile bufaka i-Real Sex ekamelweni
Ubulili bobulili obungcolile bufaka i-Real Sex ekamelweni
Ngemuva kwesikhashana uyekile, ubona umonakalo obangelwa yi-Porn
Umonakalo weP engiwubona manje
Izinsuku ezingu-40 ku, ngicabanga ukuthi ubulili bebulekele mina ngu-PMO
Izinsuku ezingu-40 ku, ngicabanga ukuthi ubulili bebulekele mina ngu-PMO
I-Porn ijwayelekile namuhla
… Angikaze nangini ngitshelwe ukuthi i-porn yayimbi- yayamukelekile / yamukelekile emphakathini, noma kulindeleke, ku-PMO. Amahlaya ahlala njalo emithonjeni yezindaba ejwayelekile aqinisa umbono wokuthi konke bekujwayelekile. futhi njengomuntu okhulele esizukulwaneni sokuqala sabasebenzisi be-porn be-intanethi, angazi okuhlukile. izithombe ezingcolile zijwayelekile.
Ngicabanga ukuthi ngangazi kahle ukuthi i-porn eyonakalisayo yayiyisikhathi eside kangakanani. Ngangizibheka emva kwamahora wokuhlela izithombe ezingcolile zobulili, futhi ngizizwe nginamahloni. ngangizithola sengilele namantombazane ephethe ingquza yami exhuzulayo ngesandla, ngiyaxolisa-- njalo nginezaba (ukuphuza kakhulu, ukungalali ngokwanele, isisu esingenalutho.) ngigcine kanjani lapha? ngisukaphi lapha? benginemibuzo kuphela ngaphandle kwezimpendulo….
http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/2hpqo3/90_days/
Abantu bakhathazeke kakhulu nge-pornography!
Abantu bakhathazeke kakhulu nge-pornography!
Abaneminyaka engu-16 akufanele babe nobulili njengabantu abaku-porn.
Into enzima engake ngiyithayiphe. (Kuzokugqugquzela)
Usayizi wePenis lwangikhathazeka kakhulu
Usayizi wePenis lwangikhathazeka kakhulu
Ngangicabanga ukuthi ngiyi-asexual.
Ngangicabanga ukuthi ngiyi-asexual.
Umlutha wesihlanu wezilonda zocansi
Umlutha wesihlanu wezilonda zocansi
I-PMO ibuyisa amakhono akho omphakathi
I-PMO ibuyisa amakhono akho omphakathi