I-Cyber erotica: Ingabe amaphikseli anganciphisa ukulangazelela kokuziphendukela kwemvelo?
UScott Adams, ongungqondongqondo ngemuva kuka “Dilbert,” usanda kubhala ucezu olubizwa ngokuthi I-Crossover ye-Digital. Nansi ingcaphuno,
Lapho nje ucansi nomshado ezweni elingisiwe… ziba ngcono kunento yangempela, akekho ozozihlupha ngezindleko, ingcindezi nokuphazamiseka…. Abantu abasathandeki ngokwengeziwe kanti i-Intanethi iba umlutha ngokwengeziwe. I-crossover yabanye abantu isivele ifikile…. Njengoba i-Intanethi ifunda ukulindela futhi ukondla izifiso zakho ngokunemba okwandayo, umlutha wakho uzokhula.
Uqinisile ukuthi i-crossover isivele iyenzeka — yize kungenziwanga ngokuzikhethela. Indaba yale nsizwa iya ngokujwayelekile:
Ngineminyaka engamashumi amabili naphakathi futhi nginesifo salesi sifo esivele sivele esisha esikhungathekile se-21st Century. Ngibe namathuba amathathu okulahlekelwa ubuntombi bami ngabesifazane bangempela benyama negazi futhi ngihlulekile njalo (njengakuqala, laba besifazane babesembhedeni wami futhi belungele ukuhamba, begqokile, kepha angikwazanga ukukwenza. Sibe namanye amathuba, ngisho namanye amantombazane alala embhedeni wami, kodwa angizange ngithuthe ngoba ngangazi ukuthi ngangingeke ngikwazi ukukwenza… ngisho ngineminyaka ephakathi kuka-18 kuya ku-22). Ngeke ngingene emininingwaneni kepha isikhathi ngasinye ngangizizwa nginamahloni ngendlela emangalisayo, ngicindezelekile futhi ngicwiywa. Angiyena ungqingili nakancane (empeleni ngingumuntu ocasukile ocansini,) kodwa angikwazi ukulala nalaba besifazane.
Uma bengingakhetha igama elilodwa ukuchaza ukuthi kunjani lapho ngizama ukulala nabo, ngisebenzisa igama elithi 'umfokazi.' Kwazizwa kungumbumbulu futhi kungaziwa kimi. Kufana nokuthi ngithole isimo esihle sokuhlala phambi kwesikrini futhi ngisigxeka ngokufa yonke le minyaka ukuthi ingqondo yami ibheka lokho njengobulili obujwayelekile esikhundleni sobulili bangempela bangempela. Ngingaba nzima nge-porn, anginankinga, kepha hhayi ngempilo yami ngingakwazi yini ukuthola kanzima kowesifazane wangempela.
Kubasebenzisi abaningi, i-cyber erotica yanamuhla ifakazela lokho okukhuthaza kakhulu kunokucabangela ngamantombazane ase-sweaters aqinile ahlala eduze kwawo e-algebra. Noma kunjalo, zenziwe ngendlela efanele futhi ubulili beqiniso buyashintsha njengoba, uthi, ushokoledi kanye nesitrobheli? Mhlawumbe hhayi-ikakhulu uma umuntu evula ukugqugquzela ngokocansi kusukela ekukhuleni kuya phambili. Ubuchopho besibhakela / ubusha buguquke emoyeni kunoma yikuphi okuvusa ucansi. Ngasekuqaleni kweminyaka engamashumi amabili ubuchopho bukhona ukhishwe ngemuva kwamasekisi angasetshenzisiwe.
Empeleni, umsebenzisi osencane oshubile ocansini ofuna ukuba nomzimba wangempela ngelinye ilanga ukuqeqeshwa kwezemidlalo engafanele. Angakwazi ukuphela ngokungaqondile ngokungahambisani nalokho okushiwo ubuchopho nalokho okushiwo umngane womshado wangempela. Ngemva kweminyaka esebenzisa i-Internet porn njengomthombo oyinhloko wokufaka ucansi, abanye abasebenzisi badinga umzamo omkhulu, nezinyanga, ukwenza inkinobho kumlingani wangempela. Lokhu kwandisa izinkinga abanye abazozixazulula nge-inthanethi yocansi.
"Shift kuyenzeka"
Ukuphawula kuka-Adams kuphakamisa nokuthi ukuheha ngokomzimba kuxhunyaniswe ngokuqinile nokwaneliseka ngokocansi ukuthi ama-hot-2-D angcono kune-3-D hhayi-hotties. Ukuphishekela lo mqondo, uphetha ngokuthi uma ungeyena umfana okhangayo, ama-hotties ama-2-D yizinketho ezingcono kunanoma yibaphi abesifazane bangempela okungenzeka ulale nabo. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ubikezela ukuthi, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ngisho nabantu abanezinketho ezinhle kakhulu kwezenhlalo nezocansi bazokuyeka ukuxhumana nabantu bakuthokozele ukuthakazelisa okuphefumulelwe ngocansi kwe-Intanethi.
I-Exclusive, noma isindayo kakhulu, ukusebenzisa i-intanethi kungahle kuholele abasebenzisi ekuphethweni kokuthi ukushisa kungcono. Okokuqala, umsebenzisi oshubile wezithombe zobulili ezingcolile uthambekele ekutholeni ukwaneliseka kuphela ngokuqina nokulingana-hhayi ukwaneliseka jikelele. Kodwa abanye abasebenzisi babona umehluko omkhulu emva kokusetshenziswa kocansi uma kuqhathaniswa nezocansi zangempela:
Ngingumuntu oqondile othanda ukubona izithombe namavidiyo ezinqunu nezocansi kanye nabesifazane besifazane abenza ucansi, njengoba kwenza abangane bami besilisa abaningi. Kodwa-ke, anginasiqiniseko sokuthi bakwenza kuze kube ngamahora ama-3 ngasikhathi. Noma kunjalo, ngokwengqondo nangokomzimba ngizizwa kahle ngamahora ambalwa. Kodwa-ke ngizizwa ngikhathele kakhulu engqondweni, kwesinye isikhathi kufana nokuthi i-IQ yami isikwe phakathi futhi angikwazi ukucabanga kahle. Uma ngikwenza lokhu ebusuku kakhulu, imiphumela ngakusasa iba mibi kakhulu. Lokhu akukaze kwenzeke uma ngimane ngishaya indlwabu ngaphandle kokubuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile ngasikhathi sinye, noma ngemuva kokuya ocansini nentombi yami. AKWENZEKI noma ngenza ucansi lomlomo entombini yami futhi ngichitha isikhathi esiningi ngibuka izitho zakhe zangasese noma. (Kuyenzeka futhi ngezinga elithile uma ngibheka i-porn futhi angishayi indlwabu ngalolo suku).
Ukushisa okuqhathanisayo akusona ukuphela kwesizathu sokushiswa kuka-2-D okudlula abalingani bangempela. Kunesizathu esicashile ngokwengeziwe. AmaBrains aguquke (waya) ocingweni kunalokho aqinisa kunoma yini ayihlanganisa nokuhlangenwe nakho okuphakeme. Le nqubo yemvelo inciphisa kancane kancane ukugxila esikhathini esizayo nokuphendula, kusiza abantu ukuthi bazijwayeze izindawo zabo.
Ngokusobala, kubuyela emuva lapho izikhuthazi zokwenziwa ziphoqelela ngokwanele ukuba zinqobe izindlela zobuchopho ezithi "Sengiqedile", futhi zenze izindlela zokudla zingalawuleki. (Bheka Kungani Ngithola I-Porn Ebaluleke Kakhulu Kunokuba Ngumlingani?) Abanye abasebenzisi babhekana nezinkinga ezibuhlungu:
[Umfana wokuqala, unyaka we-23] Ngangihamba ngombuso omubi kakhulu ngokukhathazeka kwemizwelo, imizwa yokungenalutho kanye necala elibi le-ED ukuthi ngidinga ukushaya indlwabu ngezandla zombili ngenkathi ngibheka i-porn ukuze ngifinyelele kanzima, okungaxhunyiwe ku-23.
[Umfana wesibili, iminyaka eyi-20] I-ED yami iqalile ukuhamba kancane kancane kwe-2 - iminyaka engu-3 edlule. Futhi sesifinyelele kakhulu nakakhulu ngonyaka odlule. Ngifinyelela lapho ngangingaboni khona izinkuni zasekuseni futhi izingxenye eziningi ze-porn angeke zenze lutho kimi. Isikhathi sengizobe ngifake nge-dmp dick. Ngingachitha amahora amaningi ngifaka imodeli "eyashisayo" ngokwanele. Futhi "okwakushisa" namuhla kwakungathandeki kusasa.
I-Adams ingahle iqonde lapho siphokophele khona, kepha ukugibela kungaba kakhulu futhi indawo okuyiwa kuyo ingagculisi ngokocansi kunalokho akubonisile.
Yini, uthenge inkomo yangempela?
Endaweni yokuxhuma / yedijithali, ukulinganisela nobudlelwano obuzinzile akubalulekanga kakhulu. Kungani ungathathi zonke izinyathelo ongazenza, akunjalo? Eqinisweni, u-Adams uveza ukuthi ukuncintisana nabesifazane abasebancane be-cyber kakade "sebenyusa umdlalo wabo," akuchaza njengokwenza ucansi oluthe xaxa. Kunomcabango ocacile wokuthi ucansi olungathandeki luletha konke okufanele, mhlawumbe ngoba lulingisa kakhulu uvuthondaba oludingwa yi-Intanethi.
Noma kunjalo ukuqomisana / ubudlelwane obuseduze ekugcineni kungasiza ukuvikela ubuchopho ezingcupheni zokweqisa. Eqinisweni, kungahle kuvele ukuthi kungcono sibe nokuncane Ngaphansi ubulili kunokuba sicabange ukuthi sifuna (kodwa okuningi ukuthinta okuthandwayo), kunokuba sengozini yokuphefumula okungapheliyo.
“Ukuphazamiseka” kokuziphatha kokuqomisana kungaphinde kube nomthelela ekuphumeleleni, ukwanelisa ukubophela isikhathi eside, okungazuzisa inzalo nabathandi uqobo. Lokhu kungenzeka kuhlobene kakhulu nemiphumela ye-neurochemical yokuthinta okuvamile kothando nokusondelana okuthembekile, okuthembekile. Ukuze uthole okwengeziwe:
- Ingabe Uthando Lesikhathi Esidlula Ngaphezu Kwenziwe Isikhathi Esivamile? Uma kunjalo, Ayini Ama-Correlates?
- I-Oxytocin phakathi nezinyathelo zokuqala zokunamathisela okuthandana: Ubudlelwane nokuphindaphindiwe kokubambisana
- Izimbangela zokungabi nabuthongo: Imodeli yokuhlanganisa abalingani bombhede ukuba abe nokwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo yokulala
- Ukwaneliseka ngokobulili kanye nobudlelwane obujabulisayo eMidlife kanye nabashadile asebekhulile emazweni amahlanu
Njengoba sikhathele ngokushisa, sivame ukungaqapheli iqiniso lokuthi ubuchopho bethu buguqukile ukusivuza ngemizwa yokuhleleka kokushintshanisa ukuthinta okuthandwayo kanye nobungane esiyidingayo. Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho kusebenza njengemibuzo yokulwa nokukhathazeka. Ngokuphambene nalokho, ukugqugquzela ngokocansi kuphela kuhlinzeka kuphela nge-buzz esifushane, futhi okuningi kungasishiya sizizwe sibolile:
[Ubudala 29] Iminyaka engu-2 kuphela edlule bengilokhu nginabangane abaningi. Sasivame ukuphuma. Ngikhumbula indlela engazizwa ngayo lapho ngibona nje intombazane emgwaqweni. Angikaze ngidinge izinto zokuzijabulisa. Kwakuwumuzwa wangaphakathi… lawo mandla… amandla aluhlaza, angigcina ngihamba phambili kuzo zonke izinhlaka. Ukushaya indlwabu kwakuwumkhuba wami wansuku zonke. Futhi angikaze ngizwe miphumela emibi ngenxa yayo. Ukuzivocavoca umzimba… ukusebenza… ukudlala ngothando… ukuzethemba. Konke kwakuphelele.
Lapho ngingena kulo mkhuba we-porno eminyakeni eyi-2 edlule, kwakungewona umlutha; bekungusizo nje lokushaya indlwabu. Kepha kungekudala yanda yaya ezigcawini zokudlwengula, izilwane, ucansi olunodlame. Akunasidingo sokucabanga izigcawu zocansi nentombi yami kusukela kudala. Ngazizwa ngiziqhenya kakhulu ngokuthi bengingadingi ntombazane. Ngacabanga, “Ngiyazilawula. Abantu bayiziphukuphuku ngempela ukufuna ubudlelwane obuzibophezele. Imishado… !!! Ngibheke! Ngingumuntu wokugcina !!! Ngingahlala ngedwa. ”
Kodwa kwakungalungile ngokuphelele. I-Porn yayingidla ngaphakathi. Ngokushesha ngazizwa ngicindezelekile… inkungu yobuchopho… ukukhathazeka komphakathi… izinkinga zokugaya ukudla. Ingqondo yami yakudala yayixhunyiwe. Angizange ngikhule nge-porn. Kungakho ngibona umehluko ngokukhanyayo.
Ingabe sihlangabezana nezidingo zethu?
Naphezu kokubonakala, abantu ba izinhlobo ezimbili ezibophayo. Ngokungafani ne-97% yezilwane ezincelisayo esinomshini wobuchopho obubonakalayo osenza sithandane. (Bheka Okwenza iBonobos Yenze Amamodeli Angalungile.) Izilwane ezincelisayo ezizibambisene ngokuvamile zihlanganyela ekuziphatheni ngezibopho ngezikhathi ezithile-hhayi ubulili obuhlala njalo esikhundleni sokuziphatha ngokuzibophezela. (Bheka Ukuhlala Othandweni I-Monkey-Style.)
Imishini yethu ehlukile ye-pair-bonder imemezela ukuthi ukuphakama okuvela ocansini kuvela enxuseni yokuvusa futhi imizwa efudumele evela ekuthintaneni, ukwethembana, ukuthandana, njll. Lokhu kuvame “ukuziphatha okuzibophezelayo”Kuthoba ubuchopho (okusiza ukwakheka kwezibopho ezingokomzwelo), ngaleyo ndlela kukhulise ngokwemvelo umuzwa wethu wenhlalakahle.
Ngakho-ke nanku umbuzo othakazelisayo: Ngaphandle kokugqugquzela ngokocansi okungajwayelekile, ingabe ukulinganiselwa kwethu kwezocansi okwakhelwe ngaphakathi kungasisiza Uhlelo olungenalutho lokubambisana ngokuphumelelayo, usishiye Okuningi unelisekile jikelele? Lokhu kungukuthi, unamanani alinganiselayo ashintshwe ukuze asisize (okungaphezulu noma ngaphansi) kufakwe kumlingani osebenzisa ukuxuba kokuziphatha kobulili nokuzibophezela?
Ukunqoba ukugqugquzela ngokocansi kungabangela ukungathembeki futhi ukunganeliseki ebudlelwaneni ngoba izidingo zethu eziguqukile zingaphezu "kocansi nje" akuhlangatshezwana nazo? Lezi zindlela zingase zizwakale zingavamile, kodwa, empeleni, amaphesenti amakhulu abesifazane abika ukucasula okungapheliyo futhi izinyembezi emva kocansi. Amadoda, futhi, angabhekana nokuwohloka kwemizwa ngemuva i-ejaculation kakhulu. Lezimpendulo zingase zibe izibonakaliso ukuthi sidlula inani lethu elihle lokugqugquzela ngokocansi kanye / noma ukungenzi umsebenzi okwanele wokuhlangabezana nezidingo zethu zokuthinta abantu othandana nabo ebuhlotsheni bethu.
Ngokujabulisayo, uma othile ekhipha okhiye kusukela namhlanje i-novel ye-cyber eerotica futhi amathoyizi wezocansi, ubudlelwane obuseduze bungaba yindlela ephawulekayo kubantu abadala abaningi. Yiqiniso, lesi sinyathelo singabandakanya i- ukungathandeki kokungaqondakali kusukela ekudambiseni i-dopamine, "i-novelty-as-aphrodisiac”Isu elifundwe kuwebhu, kanye nokuzimisela ukubeka eceleni imibono ethile edumile.
Ngokweqiniso, ukuvumelana okukhulu akusho Ngaphansi ubulili, kodwa kungase kusho ukuhlola izindlela zokuthanda uthando okwandisa ukwaneliseka okutholakala ngezibopho zokuzibophezela ngaphandle kokukhipha izinga lokulinganisela kwe-neuroendocrine nge-jollies njalo.
Ingabe ukulungiswa okunjalo kuwufanele? Kuya ngokuthi ukhanga kanjani ukuthola ukuthi "I-Digital Crossover" njengendawo yokugcina ongafinyelela kuyo. Okungenzeka, isiko lethu lingaba khona ngokushesha kunokuba licabanga. Ngokusho kuka-Adams uma abantu,
qhubeka nomkhuba wabo wokuthola ukukhuluphala nokuphikisana ... i-Digital Crossover ingaphansi kweminyaka eyishumi ukudlula.
Kulula ukubukwa, ividiyo ehlelwe ngobuhlakani ngokunyuka okwethusayo kweJapan ku "asexuality" nendima engadlalwa yi "Dating Sims".
UPDATES
- Izimpawu zokulutha umlutha nokukhula kwezinto ezimbi kakhulu? Izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-35 ezibika okutholakele zihambisana nokukhula kokusetshenziswa kocansi (ukubekezela), ukujwayela izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ngisho nezimpawu zokuhoxiswa (zonke izimpawu nezimpawu ezihlobene nokulutha).
- Ukubheka iphuzu lokukhuluma elingasekelwa ukuthi "isifiso sobulili esiphakeme" sichaza ukulahla ucansi noma ukulutha ngokobulili: Okungenani izifundo ze-25 zikhohlisa isimangalo sokuthi ubulili nemilutha ye-porn "banesifiso esiphakeme sobulili"
- Izinkinga zobulili nezinkinga zobulili? Lolu hlu luqukethe izifundo ze-30 ezixhumanisa ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn / ukubheja kocansi ezinkingeni zobulili kanye nokuvusa okuncane ezenzweni zobulili. I fiziqu ze-5 ezingekho ohlwini zibonisa ibangela, njengoba abahlanganyeli beqede ukusetshenziswa kwezingcolile kanye nokuphulukisa okungavamile kocansi.
- Imiphumela yocansi ebuhlotsheni? Izixhumanisi ezingaphezu kwe-60 zixhumanisa ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn kuya ekungeneni kocansi nokuzaneliseka komndeni. (Njengoba sifana nathi konke Izifundo ezibandakanya abesilisa ziye zabika ukusetshenziswa okuningi kocansi okuxhunyiwe abampofu ubulili noma ukwaneliseka kobudlelwano.)
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