Kasance kan wannan kalubale tun tafiyar wannan shekarar! Na shiga cikin ƙoƙari da yawa jere daga kwanaki 4-5 zuwa kwanakin 10-12 tare da matsakaici a cikin kwanaki 19 sau 1-2! Na kasance cikin pmo tun shekara 13… amma mummunan ɗabi'ata ta haɓaka bayan shekaru 18 lokacin da nake da pc nawa a dakina.
Kuma har ma fiye da lokacin da na je kwaleji kuma na sami damar yin "abu"! Na kasance mai jin kunya yayin yaro da saurayi kuma ina tsammanin na sami mafaka a pmo (kuma wasu wasannin bidiyo a lokacin amma ba yanzu ba)!
2 shekaru da suka gabata an gano ni da rashin lafiya na asibiti amma ban taɓa shan ƙwayoyi ba tukuna (Ina fama da motsa jiki da abinci).
Abin da ke faruwa shi ne cewa bayan 21 na tuna cewa asalin farin ciki na kwanta kuma na kasance mai banbanci, mafi tawayar, rashin tausayi kamar yadda baya! Lokaci ne lokacin da na ke kadai a ɗakina a koleji kuma maimakon kasancewa da rabu da ni ko rataya tare da abokaina na PMOing akalla kowace rana (wasu lokutan 2 ko 3 sau)!
Bayan haka a 25 na rabu da budurwata kuma na rasa aiki kuma na TUNA BAYA cewa PMO na yayi amfani da shi ya karu sosai (jinsi da lokaci: wani lokacin nakan kasance tare da P na awanni 8-10, haka kuma ina yin hira tare da hirar Facebook da cam. ) !!!! Tun daga wannan lokacin na fara haɓaka bayyanar cututtuka kamar hare-haren tsoro (maraice), ƙarancin hankali da horar da tunani. Ina da buri amma rashin motsawa, tsananin damuwa, juyawar yanayi, rashin bacci da rashin bacci, babu itace na safe, ED a wasu lokuta, ba zan iya yin jima'i da robar roba ba, rashin nutsuwa da jin rashin nutsuwa a cikin wasu tufafi, jin komai, rasa abokai , har ma da damuwa mafi girma na zamantakewar al'umma, har ma da ƙananan ƙarfin zuciya, wuyan / tsakiyar tashin hankali da sauransu !!
A bayyane yake… Ina cikin damuwa na asibiti kuma tabbas na je wurin likitan mahaukata don yin magana game da wannan. Na ƙi shan ƙwayoyi kuma na fara bincika intanet don matsaloli na. Sannan sami yourbrainonporn.com da nofap kuma na fara yin yajin aiki (jere daga 4-5 zuwa 10-12) tun farkon 2014, tare da max a kwanaki 19. Tun daga wannan lokacin ina da wasu ranaku masu kyau, wasu matsakaita kwanaki da wasu kwanaki marasa kyau, hare-hare na firgita sun tashi daga sau 3-4 a kowane mako zuwa 1-2 a kowane wata, ciwon baya da na wuya sun fi kyau kuma ina tsammanin yanayi na ya fara zuwa hawa kadan kadan duk lokacin da nayi kokarin kauracewa PMO!
KWANA UKU 3 NA KARSHE INA CIKIN KYAUTATA DUNIYA A CIKIN SHEKARU 4 BAYAN! Ina nufin na farka kuma ban yi baƙin ciki ba, Ina da sake fata. Ina son zama tare da abokai, ina so in rayu, sha'awarta ta ɗan yi kyau, barcina ya ɗan fi kyau, Ina da mafarkai kuma! Ee Ina da wasu canjin yanayi a'a har yanzu ina da wasu alamu marasa kyau amma yana samun sauki da kyau!
Ina da burin da fatan sake !!!!!! Amma na san cewa ina da wasu kwanaki masu wuya a gaba (kamar janyewa: baƙin ciki da halayyar yanayi) kuma yakin bai gama ba!
SO ga duk wanda yake tunanin cewa yana da rauni a asibiti ko kuma yana cikin damuwa gabaɗaya: da fatan za a bincika halayenku, da fatan za a fitar da batsa daga rayukanku domin a halin da nake ciki na fara yin kisan kai kuma haskakawa ga rayuwa ta tafi gaba ɗaya - amma yanzu ina da fara rayuwa / shiga cikin duniya kuma !!
GUYS YA KUMA KUMA KUMA BUKATA DA KUMA BAYA DA DA KUMA KUMA KUMA KUMA KUMA!
by n3v3rland
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